How do I stop being in love with a girl? The story is quite long and I don’t want to bore you with all the details, but the fact is that she made it clear to me, in no uncertain terms, that she is not romantically attracted to me. Fair enough. The thing is, I still like her.For about two months, I had managed not to see her anymore, and my feelings had started to fade a little. But last week I happened to run into her by chance. She stopped me to say hello and ask where I had disappeared to, and that alone was enough to undo the progress I had made over those two months.I don’t want to keep having these feelings for someone who doesn’t feel the same way and with whom I have no chance of having a romantic relationship. I would like to forget about her and move on with my life, but I can’t seem to do it.Do you have any advice?
>>34712189By understanding that you are not in love with her and never were. Love is not a feeling, love is a rational acknowledgement that both people have mutual feelings and they both choose to commit to each other. If you are 'in love' with someone who doesn't love you back, that's not love at all, that's called infatuation.
>>34712194Honestly, I’m not really convinced that the value of a feeling depends on how others perceive it. But regardless of what we want to call it, how do I actually stop being infatuated with her?
>>34712253Just allow it, it will pass, the longer you fight it the longer it stays. When you allow it that means just understand it's infatuation and that's all, if you wanna feel the feels then let yourself feel then even the shit ones. That's how you process it
>>34712189>For about two months, I had managed not to see her anymore, and my feelings had started to fade a little.you already know the recipe. the other way is alcohol, but you zoomers can't drink
>>34712965Not seeing her is very difficult for me. These past two months I managed to avoid her because it was a particular situation. From here on out, whether I like it or not, I’ll be forced to see her.
>>34715091You need to understand and internalize the fact that she really _doesn't_ care about you the way you might about her. For all you care, she might as well hate you completely. Other than that, just be friendly to her in a way that shows inner fortitude doesn't project either neediness or resentment, you really can't do any better than that. then who knows, she might even come around. the key is that you have to not really _care_ even if she does!
Replace her with a pretty potato
>>34715108Okay, but how do I stop being interested in her? I really want to tell my brain, "Hey, from now on you don’t care about her anymore" but I can’t… I understand what you mean, but I don’t know how to put it into practice.
>>34712189You are probably too isolated. Try to find a social group you can be a part of and other people will fill that gap.
>>34715605She is part of my second group of friends
>>34715609That's why they say don't shit where you eat. You might have to leave that group.
>>34715609Then hang out with group 1 and forget about group 2
Have a huge fight with her that permanently alters the way you see her forever... At least that's what worked for me when I had an FP.Otherwise, try to find things that you disagree on fundamentally. Could be small stupid petty shit but you need to get your brain used to thinking of her in a non-perfect light. If I had to guess, you have really bad limerence.
>>34715641>>34715679I can’t and I don’t want to leave that group. I’d rather feel bad every time I see her >>34715683>If I had to guess, you have really bad limerenceYes, I guess so. I’ll try to put effort into seeing her flaws and not idealizing her
>>34715697>I can’t and I don’t want to leave that group. I’d rather feel bad every time I see herYou have no choice but to cope.
