i dont know ive never had sex

i love when im having sexy time but i hate the rest of the time when they just talk and complain and whine and consume and smell bad and take your precious free time and ultimately contribute very little
now i get to do whatever i want whenever i want

>>34724626
What about the sex, do you have the ability to get hookups after that relationship, or do you stuck to hookers/masturbation?

Yeah I'd say worth it. Fond memories and you got to touch walls. Would do it again if I knew a good one. I don't feel like it's that hard to get a girlfriend it's just hard to find one worth it.

Test

>>34724602
Getting girls is insanely easy but when i was an incel something just wasn't clicking in my brain but really I just hated myself and once I loved myself I had the capacity to love someone else and be loved

I can't go back to being an incel after feeling a lot of love from women. Like I'm starting to see women as human beings who struggle like most people. Why should go back to such an angry hateful mindset that only made me crawl into more hate and misery?

>>34724627
completely dry, i dont go outside anymore tbqh, i just goon to stave off the horny

>>34724602
it's only worth it if you find the right person. A bad gf or wife will ruin your life and it's much better to be alone. I had a bad gf. I had a lot of fun going out and seeing the world with her. But I didn't get to have much sex. I probably have more anxiety about it now than I did when I was a virgin. Overall I guess it was better than being a terminally online gooner for that time. But if I had been locked in on exercise and career goals, I would be much better off today.

>>34724709
what does loving yourself mean? Can you put the feeling into words?

>>34724831
Think about the feeling whenever you play your favorite video game from childhood but its about you and everything about yourself. Even the bad stuff you accept in a way. Not that you excuse but youre able to chill out and say "im ok" once youre at that point women will like you because they see by the way you handle yourself that you are capable of being liked.

>>34724602
Eh

>>34724826
This. I've had three relationships, and then I've been an incel for five years. It's easy to find "a girl", but it's hard to find one that will genuinely add something to your life, and if you're there just for the hole you'll get bored of it very fast and it's going to be annoying as fuck.

>>34724831
It's about being a best fren to yourself, accepting yourself and also trying to become a better version.

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I'm currently 36 and literally JUST found a gf for the 2nd time in my life. My first one was at 29 (met on tinder) and that lasted just under 2 years. This one I met in a fucking online chat room of all places, and she isn't even a tranny (I wouldn't have turned one down, love girl cock). Anyway, I was a born again incel for 5 or so years there. I'm already kinda missing it, kinda not?

In the time between I have come to accept some things, like being single is *mostly* a me problem. (Mainly that I have a very specific taste in women, rare personality type and not looks wise.)

Looking back, being an incel does have its pros. Mostly having to do with free time. Almost all of your free time is dedicated to keeping her happy. It *can* be fun for you too, but most of the time I just wanna fucking browse 4chan and eat doritoes. Luckily she is currently visiting family so I have a few days to be my old self.

Maybe in time I'll get used to it? If this relationship falls through, at least I'll have bought myself a few more years before I go crazy. I think getting laid at least every few years is necessary, just to remind yourself you aren't human garbage? Maybe I'll try to forget about finding my "type" and just fuck whoever like a chad does?

Tho another good aspect of a gf is just being respected more. For some reason anyone even remotely close to you (coworkers, neighbors, and family) wants to know your relationship status. Now at least I can say I'm seeing someone. People are somehow disgusted if you say you're single? Like, youre a pariah. "Single? Whats wrong with that guy?"

>>34724831
Its bullshit single people say to make themselves happier. Like a rich person saying "money doesn't buy happyness."

>>34724602
Yeah, it was pretty fucking awesome. Basically felt like my life was a movie for a few months

To add to OPs question, but has anyone here managed to actually have fun with women?
As in , not latch onto the next best rando as a high school stlye gf but to have fwbs, hookups and so on.

>>34724602
How does one "go back to" being an incel? I mean I know it happens, I just don't understand how.
Like, doesn't getting a woman once prove that you can do it again if need be? I was under the impression that for most of you just getting that first one is the big hurdle.

>>34725673
Incelism is most often the result of mental issues. Not getting laid is just the symptom, not the cause. Generally they slip into wifeguyism and enter some reddit marriage, or it turns out that getting laid for a bit doesn't do anything to fix childhood trauma or whatever.

>>34725882
What the fuck is wifeguyism and a Reddit marriage? Speak English you dumb nigger.

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>>34724602
Hey, that's literally me
No, it wasn't worth it. Fuck "It's better to have loved and lost," the truth is a lonely heart is better than a broken heart. I might have had sex but I was left with nothing but memories that don't mean anything anymore and psychic damage.
The obvious best thing is to find a woman to share your life with and try to hold on, because going through multiple relationships isn't really great for men either. Failing that, just stop hyping it up in your head or getting disappointed about "missing out" because you're just spoiling what could otherwise be a peaceful and still satisfying life.

>>34726188
True. Sometimes it's not better because the fallout can be a disaster on multiple levels.

>>34725667
your love has to die

>>34724602
Sex doesn't matter much but real love completely transforms your life.

its better to live than not live. Just try not to let the hoe derail your life completely. That does happen. You are going to fall in love way too deeply and its going to hurt when she leaves you. But this is the only way you learn about women. You cant learn about women from books or talking online you have to experience them. They are not like us. They are NPCs to a degree that you would never believe possible. They are not people. They are driven by biological instincts which they do not question. They rarely even know why they feel the way they feel or why they do what they do. The tail wags the dog indeed.

>>34724602
i got a 9/10 gf however she was a complete hoe starved for male attention. She left me after 3 months of constant fighting, and i didnt make a lot of effort to gain her back. Yeah I'd say its worth it for the fantastic sex alone. Im dating a new girl now, nowehre near as hot but she isnt a crazy ass bitch like my last.

>>34726623
I am you bro.

Same story but I fought this bitch for 3 years. The emotional damage was huge. Now that I have another girlfriend im constantly shocked that she is not evil and does not start shit with me all the time. We have been together over six months and literally never had a single fight. There was one disagreement on an issue and that was resolved in like one day. Life can be so much fucking better when you are not with a crazy retarded bitch. Though my new gf is not nearly as hot as the old one, my quality of life is much better.

>>34726623
also the breakup was one of the most painful mental experiences ive ever had. For the first days i couldnt eat or sleep. the next 3 weeks it got better but I was thinking about her all the time. Its been 2 months now and realize how lucky I was that this breakup happened. Hope she grows out of her hoe phase out and find a good man.

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demoralization astroturf spam

>>34726635
yeah its a shame how the psychos are always insanely great at fucking.

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>>34724602
>Those of you who were incels, then got gfs and had sex lives, but then went back to being incels....is it worth it?
absolutely 100% without a doubt

when you truly have no exes, or no experience even knowing what a relationship dynamic feels like, you are totally isolated from other people and their discussion in a way that's instantly alienating and ostracizing

like did you ever grow up and at school there were the Christian kids that grew up with their grandparents and weren't ever allowed to watch South Park or the Simpsons? they might be totally nice but they just have nothing to do but look at the floor when certain topics come up in the group?

if you've never had sex or a partner that is how you come off to normal people because they can sense the lack. when they bring up "oh you know how it's like when you invite someone over and they XYZ?" and it's awkward because you really genuinely do not know?

getting a gf, even just once or twice in life, even if it never happens again until you die, is absolutely worth it just so you have that human experience in common with people

>>34724709
can you get into what you wrote there more? i recognize what you're saying but i don't see my way out. girls really just do not want me and won't go on dates with me

>>34724602
you don't really know until you try.
yolo etc. living a full life is recommended.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=FgxacX72snA&ra=m

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>>34724602
>is it worth it?
I got to experience love and that was worth it. But if you are over 25 just lose it to a prostitute to avoid wizardhood. Women are only worth it if they love you and social media / dating apps has completed warped their expectations to the point where it is impossible for them to actually appreciate your existence.
I see too many of my IT co-workers in 'respectful' for overall loveless marriages where the wife clearly doesn't fancy him and just uses him for resources. I compare this to my soccer team mates and they have wives who show up to soccer games to cheer them on and support them with genuine affection. It's a night and day difference in relationship quality.
The reality is that unless you lucked into it at university, you will never get to experience what Chad gets to experience.

>>34724709
It's crazy how people say you have to love yourself to be loved. Might as well tell anyone who wasn't blessed with perfect parents and friends to give up

>>34725882
>Incelism is most often the result of mental issues. Not getting laid is just the symptom, not the cause.
That makes perfect sense to me, but it's interesting because a lot of them will vehemently deny this and insist they'll be fine once they finally get sex. Which is ridiculous, of course.
>>34726174
>What the fuck is wifeguyism and a Reddit marriage?
I think by wifeguy he means a guy who never got play before (an ex incel, basically) who lucks into a marriage and then goes way too hard with making being a husband and family man into his whole identity and personality, even if his wife is an ugly bitch. I've seen it play out with people I know irl more than once.
By reddit marriage he probably meant the guy is getting cucked lol.

>>34727236
You need perfect parents and friends just to value yourself?

>>34727257
Seems that way

>>34727302
That was a rhetorical question I was asking you anon. The real answer is no, no you do not.

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>>34724602
>Those of you who were incels, then got gfs and had sex lives, but then went back to being incels....is it worth it?
Yeah. Everyone who says yes is correct for their assortment of reasons. I'll give you one more, it helps to have a least a little bit of foid nagging in your life to help you leave your comfort zone and unlearn neurodivergence/meme-inflected retardation. Also, not that blackpill this or redpill that is true or false but you really will not 'get' all the advice you hear about women until you experience the sting of not understanding it firsthand.

>>34727313
Nobody's ever given me workable advice for how to do it so I assume it's something you either have or you don't. It's advice given by people who already love themselves and can't imagine what it's like not to.

>>34724602
'Tis better to have loved and lost (Captain Jean-Luc Picard)
Than never to have loved at all (Of the Federation Starship)

>>34727463
>workable advice
I stop reading every time I see this expression used. And I'm pretty sure it's the same anon over and over in different threads, FOR YEARS, because I've never seen it used anywhere else.
Absolutely no one is going to spoonfeed you, but I will say this much: I used to absolutely hate myself, and I had to re-learn to love myself and build myself back up from the ground up. And I have a loving mother too, so to your earlier comment about needing perfect parents to love yourself, you're actually doubly wrong. Because not only do you not need it, sometimes you'll actually have it and still not love yourself.

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>>34724602
Yes, it's worth seeing what you're missing at least once. Seeing that
>It's fine, it's mostly just an ego boost and feeling like you fit in thing, the act itself is aight
>hot take but
>1. jerking off is basically always more stimulating and
>2. the reason birthrates are falling are because the internet and computers let us build entertainments much more enjoyable than sex
People seethe about this but it's true.

That said, it's worth seeing with your own eyes, pic related to understand how to get there.

>>34724626
it's okay to be gay or asexual too, some people just don't like women.

>>34724606
It's pretty good. 7/10

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>>34727463
>Nobody's ever given me workable advice for how to do it so I assume it's something you either have or you don't. It's advice given by people who already love themselves and can't imagine what it's like not to.
NTA but this is one of those problems that doesn't have a 'workable' solution. The solution, such as it is, is just slogs misery and lots of trial and error and failure. If you have no self worth the only fix is lots of small victories and incremental improvements that add up and after a few years you wake up one day and realize 'oh yeah this is better'. Minor improvements to your health, routine, skills, etc day by day week by week. If you're neurotic and high time preference expecting to immediately feel good after working out for a month or something like that you're just fucked and need some serious introspection. If you genuinely tried after years and have marked improvements in your life but do not 'feel' better you have something wrong with you mentally or physically.

tl;dr the solution for decimated self worth is not something you read in a 4chan post, integrate, and solve the next day it takes unsexy inglorious work over periods of time

>>34727564
>I used to absolutely hate myself, and I had to re-learn to love myself and build myself back up from the ground up.
What did you do

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>>34724602
It definitely is, and I'm saying this as someone who got the shit end of the stick. Honestly the only thing that truly makes me happy are women. I only had a girlfriend for a couple of months and I really enjoyed having someone there, and then I e-dated a girl for a couple of months and that too felt great. Being alone is the worst feeling on this earth imo.

But anyways I've only had a taste of it. It seems I don't get far, and my relationships crash a burn and make a giant fireball that only leaves me feeling worse.

>>34724602
Honestly no
Having close relationships with friends and raising pets has been much more fulfilling and satisfying than any woman I have dated and/or slept with
That's just me I'm most likely retarded tho obviously your mileage may vary

>>34727632
I raised a dog with my gf and the dog outlived the relationship and the girl and was alone with me for years but they don't live long either so it all ends up sad

>>34727661
Yeah everything has to come to an end at some point.
At least when a pet dies, I can buy another one.
They won't be the same, but the process of caring for them, loving them and receiving unconditional love from them is worth everything.
I would imagine raising a child would be more fulfilling, but dealing with women is just nowhere near worth it to me

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>>34724602
Nah. Im 40, haven't had a real gf since 26. Before that had two threesomes, 3 gf. After not giving a shit about women had its advantages. I saved so much money that I was able to invest, retire with 3m at 35.
Society hates single older men though. Your friends disapear as they all have kids. Your alone and people look at you dirty.
Dating was pretty easy at 32. I should have taken advantage of that. Also by 37 I wish I had a kid.
Hypothetically if you knew how to talk and get women than being a incel from 17-32 or 35 had huge advantages. After though it just gets worse and worse and I very much do not recomend it.
I know it sucks but if you are 32 reading this, put in the effort bro. I promise you its less painful than being single at 40.