Went to my family dentist today because one of my teeth has always bitten slightly inward compared to the others. It isn't painful or anything, it just bothered me enough that I wanted to ask if there was a simple fix. He's been friends with my family for years, so I've known him for a long time.The dental part of the appointment was really short. He basically said the only real solution would be full braces, and since it's such a minor issue I decided it wasn't worth it.But then he started talking about my life instead. For context, I finished school last year and took this year off to study at home because I honestly don't know what I want to do yet. He's asked me before what my plans are, and my answer has always been "I don't know."He spent a while telling me that I focus too much on small problems, using my concern about that tooth as an example, and that I need more direction in life. He kept saying he was speaking "as a friend, not as a dentist." I mostly just listened.Before I left, he asked me to promise that for at least one week I'd wake up by around 8 AM, spend an hour walking around town, observing things or sitting in a park, then go home and do whatever I wanted for the rest of the day. He said it was advice he'd learned decades ago and that it would help me. He also said he'd check in with me after the week, either by calling me or otherwise asking how it went, and then we'd see whether to continue.I agreed because the conversation had already gone on for a while and it felt awkward to refuse. Now I'm regretting it.What would you do in my position? Should I feel obligated to follow through just because I agreed in the moment, even if I only agreed because it felt awkward to say no? If he contacts me after a week, am I an asshole for just saying I changed my mind or ignoring it altogether?
>>34729286I'd have told him to just tend to my teeth, that I'm not paying him for life advice. I'd remind him he didn't know he wanted to be a dentist for sure at a young age, no one knows what they will end up doing by age 40. Then I'd talk with my parents and confront them since they obviously put him up to it
>>34729286He's creepy and you are annoying. Maybe he's grooming you? Stop going around acting so neurotic and vulnerable or it will keep attracting weird overbearing creeps like him. Never ask doctors little open-ended questions, you should go to them knowing exactly what you want, or else you just annoy them or they'll give you misinformation or other undesirable awkward outcomes. E.g. asking AI if a dentist can fix something about your teeth is unironically better. .
>>34729286You're really going to stress about changing your whole day schedule around because a dentist told you to? Your dentist is a customer service worker, he's there to serve you, you are the boss, it's his job to serve you, to do what you say, not vice versa.
>>34729287>>34729350I don't think my parents put him up to it. They've never mentioned anything like this before, and he has known me for years, so I think this was just his own idea. The thing is, I would not have reacted the same way if this had been some random dentist. He's been friends with my family for a long time, has been to our house before, and I've known him for years. That's why I felt awkward saying no.>>34729341Why annoying? But I think there's probably some truth to what you're saying about being too passive in situations like this. Looking back, I agreed in the moment because it felt awkward to refuse, not because I actually wanted to commit to it. If it had been a random person saying this, I probably would've just said "I'll think about it" and left. I'm unsure now whether it's fine to just tell him I changed my mind if he actually follows up, since I only agreed in the first place because I felt put on the spot.
>>34729287>>34729341>>34729350You guys are kinda annoying. >>34729286You are an idiot. You basically made an entire thread to ask if you should take a walk. How old are you, 18? If you lack the introspection to filter advice from some boomer then taking long walk may help you in some way.
>>34729407>You guys are annoying >Proceeds to give the same advice as people he found annoying
>>34729286I would say listen to him.
so you dont have a job in this gap year? whats the harm in walking around town for an hour early morning? would build a decent routine, get some sunlight. I cant see downsides to this or why its an issue. Walking is good to figure things out.
He is both correct and means well. That's all solid advice. You need direction, and you have no time to spare. Your 20s will be over soon and you will be lapped by people who spent their time well. You won't get the time back.
>>34730209not OP but im in my 20s and how do I know if I'm spending my time well? I worry I'm not but when I'm not working I'm engaging in physical exercise, hobbies, socialising with gf, but how do I know if any of what im doing is time well spent
>>34730242I'm really more talking about people who spend their 20s flunking out of college and then binging various anime, or working low level jobs and not challenging themselves at all and just coasting like life is always going to be their 20s forever.
>>34729566>>34730209Are you guys forgetting it's a fucking dentist? Is modern parenting so shit that kids no longer get guidance at home they have to find it in the streets like at the dentist office? Jesus.Well intentioned as that dentist may be, social boundaries are social boundaries and I don't think we should welcome the idea where the dentist gives lifestyle suggestions or deep life advice. What's next you want the milkman to give marriage advice?
>>34729286I think you need to spend a few more years living and gain some perspective, or get anxiety meds, not to take a walk. The advice he gave you works for people who aren't mentally ill. Doesn't work if you have an anxiety disorder. Really not sure how waking up at a certain time and wandering around for an hour without a plan then doing whatever is supposed to give you "direction".
>>34730289He's also a family friend. It's more like getting life advice from that dude you only see when he comes to your parents 4th of july party. Still awkward and lame but like, not a social faux pas exactly.
>>34730289We should all be professional. Nobody can be a human being worried about a young adult in their community with no goals and no job and no direction. Offering unsolicited advice is Verboten. We should live in a box. Commute t to work in a wheeled box we call a car. We should work at the widget factory and go home so we can eat food out of a frozen box and we can stare at an electric box with moving punctures. At no point should anyone be a normal human with messy things like concern for our fellow man. We should allow everyone to wallow in the hells of their own making.
>>34730310Good point, I forgot about the fact he was a family acquaintance of OP.>>34730370>At no point should anyone be a normal human with messy things like concern for our fellow man. We should allow everyone to wallow in the hells of their own making.You're naive. You will stop singing that tune the minute you have a kid and your local service provider starts telling them retarded shit they think is good life advice but is either shit or even degenerate.Take this board for example. Remember all the shit retard advice you saw? Now imagine your local butcher or postman or bus driver chirps the same shit to your dependents like a teenage son. "Concern" is cheap. Remember that your local troon is "concerned" that you don't enjoy the idea of having your kids listen to their queer bedtime stories at school.
>>34730392I have kids but they're too small to get shit advice. My goal is to be on top of it so they're never to that point. I was given horrifically shit advice from out of touch boomers all throughout my teenage and young adulthood years. It never mattered.
>>34729286You accepted challenge. Now don’t be a pussy.
>>34730415Yeah same, I got kids too. Let's make a pact then, I agree not to give your kids advice, you agree not to give my kids advice and we're even. We will create a deal of mutually assured shit advice nukes if one of us breaks the pact. Deal?
>>34730443What specifically happened to make you so incredibly ass pained about unsolicited advice ?
Idk take it as guidance, prolly saw himself in you and was just trying to give you some advice to help out. Worse thing that happens is you walk around town and see something new. Take the time to think retrospectively
>>34729286It's not terrible advice. It just means "Take some time for yourself, to free-associate and let your mind wander, to see where it goes." It's a simple variant on meditation or yoga. Try it if you want to, or don't if you don't.
>>34730242paths of mastery and success - one or botheither pick a skill/craft to work on or a career/business to build up (or both)you will get lifemogged by someone who dedicates their 20s to those thingsi picked cyber security, music and yoga (and lifting) at the start of my 30s and i think all the time how much i'd mog my current self if i'd just invested the same effort at the start of my 20s
>>34730242>>34731643to actually answer your post think along the lines of "where will i be in 10 years if i keep spending my time how i do at the moment" and if that's impressive, then keep it up
First time on /adv/ and wow, you guys sure are a special breed (not talking about OP)
>>34729286Sounds like a family friend just trying to be helpful. At your young age, it'll seem like he's interfering but he means well. Spending a week waking up early and seeing a part of your town you might not normally see isn't the worst thing. It's like a nice way of saying touch grass. Try it out. It beats being told to floss more every damn time.
