I have a friend who is a girl. She has a lot of guy friends, she is the nerdy autistic type.I am beginning to like her. This is bad because I have no idea how to dilleniate whether or not this feeling is reciprocal, because of the fact that these feelings have developed over the course of us hanging out, as friends do, and as she does with her other guy friends from time to time.My friends think she likes me as while she does hang out with her other guy friends, she has been making time specifically for me a LOT recently. And planning a bunch of future "hang outs" too (dinners, events etc.) Not in a group setting, either.I do not want to ruin our friendship, but I also genuinely don't know how to parse this.Have any of you been in situations like this? How can you tell the difference? Keep in mind, nerdy autitstic type. She has dated guys that started out as friends before as well, but again, no idea how to parse if this is different from where I am sitting.I'm being told "yeah it's kind of obvious she likes you" by my other friends but they are more normal so they misread the autism. Maybe AudHD is more accurte. Still. I don't know.What the fuck do I do.
*accurate.I never, ever make typos. That's how I know I'm frazzled.
Oh my God, another typo: the nerdy, *autistic type.I'm so fucking cooked.
>>34729323Ask her out if she is the shy autistic type. You could ruminate on a massive essays worth of nuance in what to say to her, you could verbally spam her with small hints and double meanings to hope she gets your intentions all day long, but if she is autistic it is going to go in one ear and out the other, it won't register in her brain. Autists, both male and female are socially blind as shit. They go their whole lives getting flirted with, hit on, passively signalled, and they go home and think "no one wants me.. I'm too boring." When reality is they had dozens of fucking people throughout life making indirect moves either verbally or with body language and they just can't see it or register it. When you sit them down and tell them explicitly that it happened and you break down the social logic they say "it sounds nice and encouraging.. but I can't bring myself to believe it, it's not realistic.. at least not for me." (The autists idea of 'realistic' is they wanted a human to behave like a movie character and dramatically fall into their arms and exclaim "Oh how I love you! You are so desirable oh you absolutely rule my heart!") And because that doesn't happen they don't see any actual realistic social signs.So if you want her, go and say "I like you. I want to go out with you on a romantic date. Here is the date and here is the time and here is the location."Done, simple, direct, straight forward and unmistakeable that's how you get through to nerdy autist types. If you try to play the normie way, they get too caught up on "what if?" Catastrophic anxiety spirals and ends up sled sabotaging by isolating themselves from trying
>>34729381>>34729323Unfortunately your success will hinge on her friend group, her male friends. I got no clue why she has a pack of guys swarming her, but once you date her and build something, they will need to go bye-bye, because if she has autism she will have zero read in the fact that the guys are angling to fuck her. She will be in complete denial. That's gonna be a pain. Another obstacle is because she is autistic, she will do "reassurance seeking". Where they gossip and over share without intending, they just can't trust their own evaluation of a social event (like being asked out) and what she will do is she will ask her guy friends about you. She will show them what you said or texted, and then your success hinges upon the approval of a pack of dudes who may or may not want to fuck her. It really depends on the type of guys they are. Some autistic girls can be unlucky and so socially blind that a group of guys agree to just keep her around as a living sex doll basically, they all notice she can't read people and just take turns with her politely.
>>34729394And I know that possibility of getting passed around like a blunt and used sexually by a lack of men is demoralising but that's just one of the shitty things autistic women run into socially, statistically they are 70-90% more likely to be sexually assaulted or abused in their life than the average woman (20 - 30%) due to their latent inability to tell friend from foe. This doesn't mean her friend group are doing that, but it's a reality you gotta brace yourself for if you decide to date the autist girl, she will walk into social dangers constantly and if her ear belongs to people who want to watch her get fucked up, she will compulsively listen. You see it in /adv/ all the time I've seen femautists over share about their relationships and the story is she has a decent boyfriend they just have a minor inconvenience and they will spend dozens of posts agreeing with and listening to coomers who tell her to destroy her relationship and just find someone else to fuck.So as cute and nerdy as she is, just remember to prepare yourself for what you're getting into. If she were a lone shy autistic girl who preferred being by herself, that's doable. If she's got a swarm of dicks around her, you might wanna evaluate the situation before asking her out
As long as she trusts me over all else, just as she promised,and she has not actually betrayed us and we have each other just as that sat forward then we are set.
>>34729323Females don't have autism. She is aware she's using you all for favours.
>>34729381>So if you want her, go and say>"I like you. I want to go out with you on a romantic date. Here is the date and here is the time and here is the location."
>>34731517Got a problem, nigga?
>>34731517Lmao unironically yes, autists would say yes to that boondocks nigga>I like you, and I want you, and I am speaking in the romantic variety and the sexual persuasion. I would like you to attend this [location] at this specific [day] at this particular [time]. We will have this specific [food] and we will pay for it in this precise [method/splitting the bill or I will pay]. Afterward we will go to a [specific hotel] at this [specific time] and we will engage in what is known as [coitus]. But after that we will play with Legos or perhaps stack boxes arranged by size or color. Perhaps on the next date you could help me arrange my library alphabetically.
