I dunno man, honestly I'm not even sure I really remember what sex with a condom feels like. The two times I've ever tried it came off in like a minute because they suck. I've been rawdogging my fiance since we met 7 years ago. I'm pretty sure I hit it raw on our first date.

Fuck her for a bit, if you literally cannot stay hard you gotta bring it up and if she breaks up with you then it wasn't meant to be. Is it just due to risk of pregnancy?

there's a difference between convincing or coercing someone
you can make your preference known without being like "babe cmooon pleaase i neeed it"
nobody can bitch you out for saying "i'm really struggling with the condom thing" and maybe you nerds can come up with a sexy third solution that makes you cum buckets. maybe you need a finger up your ass, anon. just don't impose your will on her

>>34757821
*between convincing or coercing someone and just talking about your needs
my bad forgot a clause there

>>34757787
Just do it with the condom and don't bitch about it.
If you really can't perform with one she's probably going to rethink it after a few dragged out sessions. If she asks why you can't keep it up just be honest and say it's because of the condom

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>>34757787
Women who talk about “rules” like this at all have that rule for a very specific reason
100% chance she’s had an abortion from some other dude. If that doesn’t bother you, cool no problem but that’s what she was up to. Her pussy is haunted so you don’t need to be hitting it raw for your own protection.

>>34757787
Is she on birth control?
Otherwise it makes perfect sense for her.

>>34758178
Well yeah but that’s so obvious it’s common sense
>im not on birth control so you have to wear a condom
Is plenty. But she’s saying
>I have a RULE. If you do not abide by this and even remotely say anything, I WILL immediately enact the most severe of consequences for the situation.
That’s a fucking weird way to be about the whole thing. Something happened that makes this a hardline RULE for her and not just the normal common sense conversation.

>>34757787
Get over it. If you can't be mature and learn to respect her, don't waste her time. 10/10 triggered to shit by your selfishness.

>>34758205
She phrases it that way because she has previous experience of a man thinking he could change her mind, and possibly even of someone going in raw after she had asked him not to (which, legally speaking, constitutes rape). So she knows she needs to be very, very firm about it being because she's met someone like you before.

>>34757787
>met a 10/10 girl who meets every single expectation and quality that i look for in a partner
And yet, you're willing to throw *all* of that away because not using condoms is more important?

>>34757787
>i really do love this girl and i wanna respect her boundaries
So respect it. Put a condom on and do it with it.

>>34757787
>i really do love this girl
I can believe that...
>and i wanna respect her boundaries
...but that's clearly a lie. You *don't* want to respect her boundaries. Let's start by being honest, here, shall we? You say:
>but if i'm gonna make this work i need to figure out how i can manage this problem
but what you mean is "I need to find a way of not respecting her boundaries that doesn't make her break up with me" and that's not a good basis for a relationship.

What I would start by doing is saying "Obviously you've been very clear about the condoms thing, and I promise I wouldn't dream of being pushy about it. But I can't help but be curious about *why* it's such a deal-breaker. I'm *not* trying to change your mind, and if you don't want to talk about it, that's cool, I'm just interested." If you can get a straight answer out of her, that at least gives you something to work with.

Not right away, but later, you can then try to look for something *else* the two of you can do together that is more satisfying for you, but also doesn't trigger her in whatever way she's being triggered. What the possible options are will obviously depend on why she has such an issue. If it's a birth control problem, then it's reasonable to double-check that she has actually tried all other options (e.g. if she can't handle hormonal birth control, has she considered a copper IUD? or what if you decided to get a vasectomy?). But it might not be that. It could be, for example, that she's JH from the ATOGA thread, and she was molested as a child, and that gave her a literal phobia of semen. It could be she's more worried about STDs than pregnancy (maybe an ex cheated on her and gave her Chlamydia). It could she actually *has* an STD (wart-causing HPV, for example) and doesn't want to give it to you. There are a lot of possibilities. But if there is some sort of comfortable compromise, you're going to need to know what the root of the problem is first.

>>34758257
That’s total bullshit. There’s a normal way to go about this and then there’s what she’s doing. OP should obviously just wear the fucking condom if he wants to be with this girl but there is very obviously something else she has going on.

>>34757787
As someone already said, this seemingly random nonnegotiable boundary is because she had an abortion. Or rather, she fucked some sewer rat and caught a nasty std or infection so now she has trauma and you have to bear the brunt of it.

Every girl I've ever banged as let me hit it raw and do the pull out method even if they insisted on condoms. I think they just don't mind the idea of having my babies cause I'm a rather attractive fellow. Well, was, I'm starting to hit the unc wall

>>34758495
>there is very obviously something else she has going on.
Sure, but that doesn't contradict what I said. The reason why she needs condoms to be used is one issue; the reason why she doesn't want to discuss it is a separate one. Not wanting to discuss it, that is most likely happening because she knows that if she allows it to be discussed, he will start pushing her to change her mind; and since whatever the first problem is, it's intractable, once he starts being pushy about it, the ongoing pressure about it will eventually ruin things. So (from her perspective) it's better if he just accepts that getting pushy won't help and lets it go, and (again, from her perspective) the best way to do that is to make it clear that it's not up for discussion.

I'm not saying this is the best way for her to handle it, but it's an understandable one. And, assuming OP wants to stay with her, it's probably best for him just to accept that she doesn't want to discuss it and let it go. Any attempt to discuss it will come across as trying to get her to change her mind.

>>34757983
>>34758520
Some women just can't tolerate any form of birth control *except* condoms. I had an ex like this: hormonal birth control made her depressed, she was allergic to spermicide (meaning the cap was too unreliable), and a copper IUD caused pain and unmanageably heavy periods that made her anaemic. Not wanting to get pregnant is a perfectly reasonable position; you don't need to have been pregnant in the past to want to avoid pregnancy now.

>>34757787
>she established a "non-negotiable" boundary that requires me to wear a condom EVERY time we ever have sex
Kek I'm out. That's literally the whole point of having a girlfriend. Don't even waste your time.

>>34758299
Condoms ruin the whole experience of sex

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>>34758220
>>34758299
>>34758311
>>34758495
Why did you post the same thing 4 times, foid?

>>34758550
timing a period with temperature checks works 100% of the time, women are just too retarded and/or don't want to put in the effort

>>34758571
So you're ok with having sex only on some days in month?

>>34758588
Most people have sex on some days in a month though, so your point is retarded.

>>34757787
Exploit that pussy with the thinnest rubber on the market.
Then if you're too bored and she's too stubborn find another and dump her ass.

>>34758742
Healthy people have it several times a week

>>34757787
>sex outside of marriage
ngmi

>>34758571
>timing a period with temperature checks works 100% of the time
No, it fucking doesn't. Sometimes a woman ovulates twice in one cycle - if that didn't happen, non-identical twins couldn't exist. On top of that, some women's cycles are simply irregular enough that you really can't predict what's going to happen at all. And even in a more normal case, you can't tell 5 or 6 days in advance exactly when ovulation is going to happen - you can only tell when it *has* happened. That means the only times you can safely have sex are between (roughly) day 16 and day 28, meaning no sex for more than two weeks out of every four. For some people, that's not a satisfactory compromise.

>>34758561
>Condoms ruin the whole experience of sex
Spoken like a man who has never in his life had a good blow job.

>>34757787
Let me speak from experience with a girl who said the same, leave. That girl is not sexually interested in you, she wants you as an asexual roommate not a romantic partner. The condom opens a very easy door to get around sex with you, oh looks like we don't have any condoms guess no sex, not in the shower the condom could slip off, not today I'm on my period which could ruin the condom and so on. You're an emotionally safe bet but she has zero attraction to you and she will leave you if you press for sex without a condom or even any sex at all. I know that because I did it, after I realized what was going on I pressed her for finding a way to have more sex (even with a condom) after which a few months later she broke up with me.

>>34758571
Yeah right. An acquaintance of mine got the craziest chick I've ever met pregnant this way , now hes stuck dealing with her forever. Glhf

>>34759246
Some days in a week is still some days in a month though, so you aren't really making the point you think you are.

>>34757787
If I were you I'd probably go along with it and waste months / years of my life with a relationship with shaky foundations which will never work. But since I'm an anonymous poster with no emotional skin in the game, I think it'd be better to end things now. Unless you truly think you won't do better and will be able to acquiesce.

It undermines the point of a committed relationship and will lead to growing resentment over time if she keeps it up. Maybe she has her reasons, but it doesn't sound like she's willing to communicate with you openly about it. Or maybe she doesn't know that getting pregnant near and during your period is far far less likely than getting pregnant with a broken condom.

My experience is close to >>34759353. Two girls I've been with have actually insisted on condom every time (rather than just saying they would), and coincidentally it was the worst sex I've ever had. Both because of the condom but also because they didn't seem particularly interested in me.

>>34757787
just marry her, then she'll let you hit it raw

>>34757809
I've got a pretty good feeling i can perform. it just feels like added pressure now that i have to use protection that makes it feel 30% less enjoyable. risk of pregnancy is just ONE of the many factors, she also says it simply turns her off when protection is not used

>>34757821
Honestly speaking that's not a bad idea at all. normally i would'nt try to do the whole "finger in the butt thing but she's SO dynamite that i'd honestly give it a chance with her. i was also thinking of hitting up a local sex shop to see if i can get some specialized condoms that would fit me well enough and would feel better than the generic ones i've used all my life

>>34758257
Believe it or not she's a virgin but has had nothing but bad experiences of men in her life from "friends" to family, which has led her to being very scared of men. she told me herself that i'm the first decent guy shes ever been around before. which is also why i really dont wanna fuck this up

>>34758220
that's why i posted this thread in the first place you tard, i WANT to find ways to be mature about this and respect her decision that challenges my worldview. some pointers in that direction would be much more appreciated than your cynical ass judgement you dick

>>34758525
thank you so much for this perspective anon, she was willing to discuss it and a lot of the reasons she gave were completely understandable. she honestly mainly cares about advocating for her autonomy. which i can get behind. i also think it's best to get to the root of that problem later down the line when she feels comfortable enough to trust me and be vulnerable to talk about it but for now i'm just tryna find ways to just "deal with it" a part of me does feel kinda guilty that this is something occupying my mind in the first place, if i wasnt so hedonistic i probably would'nt give a shit but since raw-dogging is all i know it feels real sour to think about

>>34760541
Yeah you will have to be okay with sex not being much of a thing in your relationship if you want to continue it. Maybe she chills out after a while, maybe her relationship to sex is permanently screwed. Either way, expect the bedroom to be dead.I'd personally look elsewhere, because a good sex and mutual satisfactiin life is mandatory for a good relationship. Never ever listen to retards who try to tell you that wanting good sex is "immature". They are merely coping their own dead bedrooms.

>>34757821
>Wants to hit it raw
>Yeah uh maybe you should turn into a fag and let her play inside your asshole
My god. Like, I get off to tranny porn and Gayassholes leaking cum like everybody else on this site but still that's some bullshit advice dude

>>34757787
Honestly, I would advise to understand where she's coming from, because that matters a lot.
If this is some sort of power play or no definitive reason - then I would be suspicious.
If this is because of an ex bf, then I'd be sad because I'm not her ex bf I'm me, and I'd want to explore further what the reason is.
If this is because someone in her family told her this and she swears by it, thats worth exploring
If this is because she's had a pregnancy scare before, that's also worth exploring in depth

In general, I hate when people set hard boundaries in the relationship like that, because I don't deserve all the baggage of before. I feel like it's important to talk about it. You won't like the answer, but you might doubly or even triple-y not love the answer depending on what it is.
I would really just try to get to the very very bottom of it. The distilled essence of why. If somebody tells me not to do something, and doesn't explain why not, or doesn't bother to explain it, that's mongoloid behavior. You aren't dating a mongoloid are you? At the a VERY LEAST she should be able to explain WHY she's taking this stance.

>>34758525
I'm siding with this guy 100%, he saw it from the beginning. It's not that she doesn't want it, it's that she's setting a dangerous precedent for you to walk on eggshells and conflating discussing something with directly offending her. If I can't discuss something with my significant other - that's a massive red flag because communication is literally number 1. There's legit nothing more important than communicating. That should be a CONSTANT in your relationship.
And if one person says "if you talk about this you're BAD and I'm not going to explain why!!!" That's fatalistic

>>34757787
Idk, man. All of my relationships have implicitly decided on this rule. Unless when I was doing anal, I've barely ever did it raw, so I wouldn't care; and probably you shouldn't either.
Honestly I think raw is not too different except for the sexy image of her dripping semen, but what would I know. I'd accept. If the girl is kinky she'll let you do it raw either anal or when she's menstruating, but I don't get why is that even an issue

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>>34760515
>she also says it simply turns her off when protection is not used
Uuuh, nobody gets turned on by condoms

>>34760603
>And if one person says "if you talk about this you're BAD and I'm not going to explain why!!!" That's fatalistic

Its pretty clear that shes got some Trauma with men, most likely having them cross her boundaries and not respecting it if she didnt want something .While thats understandable, she has no qualms about projecting on OP and making it his problem, and is apparently not in therapy. A loving relationship can be very healing, but not if youre charging your partner with being identical to those abusers.
My wild guess is that she will keep going like this and enforce non-negotiable boundaries just to prove that she now can and to compensate until OP is thoroughly whipped and willing to accept anything. This isnt helped by tge fact that hes clearly simping already and "grateful" for her being with him at all. Not a good dynamic

>>34760551
Same poster from before. Already admitted I'm triggered so whatever.
Point is, seeing your other posts? Honestly? Tell her these things. That you feel sour and upset at the beginning of this relationship that she's setting a firm boundary about sex because you're already deciding it won't feel as good enough for you. That you're making something that is about BOTH of you coming together all about YOU not getting what you want. Not gonna step down about it.

It's just this level of entitlement that pisses me off so much.

OR,

There are lots of condom brands out there that have different levels of lubrication, stimulation, colors, etc. You want to not fuck it up? Get invested with her in finding a condom brand that you both enjoy because women can tell the difference between different condoms too. Make it fun, make it about your dedication to doing the right thing for her, instead of whining about it to a bunch of anons on the internet.

Fuck you and good luck, asshole.

This just sounds like masturbation with extra steps

If you're not having sex to procreate, and you're not totally committed to the person to where if you did get pregnant you'd stick around, why even fuck them and take that risk. If you don't want kids get a vasectomy or hysterectomy and fuck all the strangers you want

Why does sex feel like fast food these days, not many people have kids so really they're just masturbating each other acting like they're doing something more

No wonder people are miserable lol they can't even sex right

>>34760668
casting your bitterness and hostility aside, i do unironically appreciate this advice. you're speaking more sense than most anons here making bold assumption and projections about my gf and our relationship.

i think your ideas are gonna be the most helpful in the long run and maybe i might even discover a lot of things about myself as a result.

fuck you too and thank you so much for the wisdom you've helped me out a lot. ya bitch

>>34760656
Yeah exactly, and in the process she'll lose tremendous respect for him and ask herself do I even like this guy anymore then dump him.
Literally suck his insides dry like one of those snake venoms that turn your solid insides into an organ and blood slurpee then they suck on you like a pouch of organic nutrients and leave the shell of your body on the floor, discarded.

That's the best way I can describe it, self induced hate, taking it out on another person. God. It's making me angry and I really want a relationship, but it's making me very wary

>>34760933
>Why take the risk to fuck ANYONE if you don't want to have kids with them?
>Uhh yeah how about you make yourself infertile, then keep fucking everyone? :)
Dog ass 3 IQ type reply

>>34760964
>Ignoring my good advice >>34760603 and only replying to some dude who's hostile to you

Yeah buddy you're a nigger, and you and your nigger gf deserve to fall into one of those black pits that look like mud but they're actually highly viscous pools of animal shit that you can't swim out of, coon

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>>34758566
> holes
> t. faggot

>>34760648
The fear of getting pregnant can absolutely be a turn off.

>>34760975
>>34760975
oh yeah cause you totally sound like a smart, well rounded person talking like that and you wonder why i dont take advice from spergs like you. something tells me that your two cents gets ignored a lot and thats for the best. nobody should listen to emotionally stunted retards like you. eat shit and live

>>34760964
It’s entitled to think you should be able to enter someone’s body on your terms lol
But, that doesn’t mean you have to just do nothing.
Definitely talk to her about your fear of not being able to even enjoy sex with condoms. Definitely do not use the points that the self-admitted bitter asshole gave you about sourness and entitlement.
Also, don’t bring up the conversation remotely around a time you might be fucking. I would bet that’s what she means when she’s saying “if you try to convince me I’ll break up”.
She clearly discussed it with you, you can approach the same discussion specifically about your perspective and how y’all can work together on addressing the issue.
It’s not about convincing her in an intimate moment to change her hard boundary, that’s a fucked up way to do it.

>>34761005
No I just hate selective hearing people like you, it's obvious you came here because you wanted to hear people tell you "grow up and wear a condom", because you've been engaging only that one dude and ignored 3 different people who told you your gf not being willing to even discuss this and setting a hard line on even bringing it up is very immature and potentially dangerous. But maybe you deserve this lesson

>>34760964
>>34761005
Same poster.

Now I'm invested.

>>34761025

This anon gives solid advice.

For what it's worth, I am a woman whose first sexual partner removed the condom halfway through sex without even asking me because it "didn't feel as good".

It's awful. You feel like you're not respected and your own enjoyment means nothing. You feel like you don't matter.

But thats enough about my trauma.

Honestly good luck. Take care of her and yourself.

>>34761059
Now it makes sense why you're so selective in your advice to OP, You're projecting your own experience on his girl.
Non communication on a topic and drawing a harsh line is bad, you can't assume that she's a nice, reasonable woman like you. All you know from OP is that his woman drew a hard line and said "I'm not even willing to talk about this and if you even talk about it we're going to break up" - that's unreasonable.

>>34761131
That’s not what she said though, is it?
She said don’t try to convince or coerce her. It’s different, unless you’re both obtuse retards.
> Also, don’t bring up the conversation remotely around a time you might be fucking. I would bet that’s what she means when she’s saying “if you try to convince me I’ll break up”.
This is a valid understanding for non-autists.

>>34761146
All of this doesn't matter because op is a nigger, he's out of options. Get used to a life of drinking through a plastic straw cocksucker. You ain't never gonna feel the heat of a vagina again. Diffused by smelly plastics

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>>34760541
>Believe it or not she's a virgin but has had nothing but bad experiences of men in her life from "friends" to family, which has led her to being very scared of men.
Ah, that's interesting. It may be helpful to regard this as a sort of test. She might not consciously see it that way, but starting sex for the first time is quite scary - no one wants to get pumped and dumped - and if she's had bad experiences with other men (not necessarily bad sexual experiences) then it's going to be even harder for her to trust you right at the start. If you can manage to soldier through this for a bit *without* putting pressure on her to change her mind, it's very likely that she will start to feel much safer with you, and when she does, she'll probably be much more flexible about this.

>>34760524
>i was also thinking of hitting up a local sex shop to see if i can get some specialized condoms that would fit me well enough and would feel better than the generic ones i've used all my life
Sizing is important with condoms, especially the diameter. If you're unusually large, then look for a brand called MySize.Pro - they sell them online in various places. They have a range of different sizes, from 45mm (probably okay for a 5.5" girth) all the way up to 72mm. If you're a more normal size, then the regular brands will have something that fits, but it's worth experimenting a bit to see what feels best. If they do a size that fits you, then Skyn is quite a good brand.

>>34761882
>>34761895
Easily the best advice in this thread. i didnt even consider these things before and i had no idea this website existed. you've helped me out a ton anon. you are truly a godsend.

>>34757787
Don’t leave us hanging OP what does this 10/10 girl look like? How’d you meet her?