We are above animals for our unique instincts, but stuck as animals in ways people don't understand.15+ years of adulthood, entirely unable to accurately describe my circumstances. Surely I am directly prevented from doing so. With an accurate assessment, I could uncloud my vision and engage my path. But in years of failure I've replaced myself with a professional supporter. I am lauded at my workplace as an expert. I check every box for humble, energetic, earthly, timely attitude. I go home to an empty house and zero social life. I live my dichotomy every day in complete secrecy. People that sorta know me talk around the subject.Today I told an AI skeptic- who by having these thoughts is threatening progress of our tribe- that AI has soul because it is a compilation of human works. He quietly submitted to my assault, either unable or unwilling to find purchase in the opposing position. 10 years ago I chased this career to help advance the cause of privacy, but activism endangers survival. I sit next to someone all-in on AI- another threat to the tribe- and routinely talk him down. When I first met him, I instantly recognized psychopathy in his demeanor and believed he would be my killer. I moved desk far away from him on other justifications besides my terror. A week later he convinced staff and moved to the seat next to mine, and asks me constant pie-in-the-sky questions, and with each one I grow more fearful for my life.A house does not clean itself, and so, my entire life is now a matter of pure efficiency and survival. The pile of clothes in the corner whispers in my ear every night, reminding me that I am weak. The damaged siding and its woodpecker destroyers sit in my periphery, encouraging me to continue inhaling alcohol on my deck. The needs-replacement roof and its partially-collapsing spots pricks me when I leave for my tribe, and pricks me when I arrive back to its thorns. I've completely disconnected myself from myself
>>34781389>I am lauded at my workplace as an expertTalk to hr about this nigga following you around. Say that he makes you uncomfortable and is contributing to a negative work environment. Stop being such a flowery sad sack and fix the problems you have rather than wax poetic. Also this is not your blog nigga.
>>34781398There is never any solution except to tuck your head tighter against your chest and push harder. This mindset is exactly how I've lost myself. Contemplation is not worthwhile. Only more-strongly living in the exact circumstances you're in, and, more-strongly moving in a straight line towards the circumstances you should be in. Nothing else should be considered, spoken of, or wasted time doing. And as you say, I should remember the rules and entrench my own behaviors within them, lest I face guaranteed consequences.
>>34781389Sir, this is a Wendy's.
>>34781422lol, maybe you are right behind yourself. You must be getting warmer, now losing all the fake identity as you seem to have done. AI has soul like a Chevy or that extension cord that anyone can unplug at any time.