I don't know if anyone else relates to this, but does anyone ever feel like they belong everywhere and nowhere at the same time?I've never really been socially awkward. I have friends. I get invited to parties, coworkers ask me to go out, people invite me to skate, and nobody treats me like an outcast.But I never feel like I actually belong.It's like I'm always present, but never someone's person. I'm part of the group, yet somehow still outside of it. Everyone else seems to naturally pair off or have someone they're close to, while I'm just... there. Existing.People will talk to me for a minute, then go back to the people they're actually close with. I'm not ignored, but I'm rarely the person anyone seeks out.After a while, you start wondering if you're the problem.The worst part is that when someone is genuinely kind to me, I sometimes mistake it for a deeper connection. Not because I'm trying to force anything, but because kindness feels so rare that my brain wants to believe it means more than it does. Then reality hits, and I realize they were just being a decent person while I had already built a completely different picture in my head.It's embarrassing to admit, but I think loneliness can mess with your ability to tell the difference between simple kindness and real emotional closeness.I've tried changing myself to fit in before, but I hated it because people ended up liking a version of me that wasn't real.So now I'm just... me.The thing is, I don't want more acquaintances. I don't want to be "that nice coworker" or "that guy from the skatepark." I just want to know what it's feels like to have someone who genuinely cares about me as a person, not because we happen to share a class, a job, or a hobby.Does anyone else experience this? If so, what helped? Or am I just looking at this the wrong way?
I think you're having excessively idealized expectations of what does "a deeper connection".What does "genuinely cares about me" means? What do you think it means? Is it merely about the volume of attention you receive? Or is it something else?
>>34781766Not attention but like, someone that atleast texts me first, or genuinely care. Someone that contacts me, without being something about a lecture or work or something else ykwim. Because after work, summer vacation, it gets so lonely that I don't get notifications from social apps if I didn't message someone.
I think you just have to come to terms to the fact that you aren't particularly interesting or charismatic. Don't take it as an offense, it's just a part of life, not everyone can attract attention reliably from the general public.Some are destined, or defined, to be more like "followers" people that are accepted but not particularly sought.Why is that? There are many factors at play, like beauty, influence, social intelligence and experience.What's wrong with being just you? Also, most people are tendentially passive in their endeavors, social stuff included, so as I said, don't take it too personally.
the only blokes I know that'll just call you just to have a chat, are gayeither make the effort to find and foster faggy connections, or quit acting like a woman>my head is already full of bullshit, i don't need yours too
>>34781758society has accepted you, it just doesn't have much to offer.https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Af-k9sTAYEQ&ra=m
Fuck, I'd offer some advice if I had any, but you somehow described my situation and feelings spot on
>>34781827i'd call you to just have a chat>>34781758hey op, i didn't read all that, but are you still at status quo or did any response help you?
>>34783478I'm kinda starting to accept it, someone up there said "Some are destined, or defined, to be more like "followers" people that are accepted but not particularly sought." I'm starting to give up on it I'm ngl. You never get everything you want in life.
>>34781758https://youtu.be/lqZehFAwoTM?t=32It's over as soon as you turn 18 and leave the school system without a well established social circle. You go to work, but you won't make any friends, just coworkers. You join a sports club, same deal. It's over, because everyone already has their social circles locked in since childhood. You'll be nothing more than a coworker, destined to be alone for life. Social life and relationships are like trains you have to catch at the quay, a race against time that takes place during adolescence. And by extension, logically of course, no social life and no women.But normies don't understand this because they are clueless normies who think you can walk into a bar full of strangers and magically form a social life like in The Sims. Only women can start from scratch and create a social life and get a boyfriend from scratch because of their status as women.Whether you're 30 or 40 it doesn't change anything, maybe for the normies, but for you and me Chud, a year is like any other, the sands of time flowing towards nothingness, nothing more.. nothing less.
