I don't know how to connect with people normally, but I feel so lonely. My mind is constantly racing with random thoughts. I even realized I shouldn't try to write normally anymore, and that I should just feed my thoughts into an AI to make them sound more human.Right now, I feel incredibly sad. I don't know what's right or wrong, or even what to think anymore. I just wish someone liked me. Therapy hasn't helped me at all.I feel happy whenever my parents accept me, but that rarely happens. I grew up in a really messed-up household. My dad used to beat me, and my mom would just tell me, 'He loves you in his own twisted way.' Because of that, I now crave being treated badly. I even developed a highly specific, random fetish before I even knew pornography or sex existed. I'm mentioning this just to give you an idea of how completely disconnected from other people I really was.I just want someone to love me unconditionally. I realize no one ever will, but I don't know what to do. I am just so tired. I keep trying to find a connection, and then I give up completely for weeks at a time, only for the desperate need for people to come right back again. I'm just so exhausted.
>>34784751Ever since the covid hoax I stopped interacting with the goyim cattle. I just look through them and pretend they don't exist. I don't even greet them or acknowledge their presence. I'm not staring either, I'm just looking straight through them as if they weren't there.My life has significantly improved. I am at peace
>>34784751since you didn't respond to the other anon i'm going to assume you're gone op. reply to the others if you want more feedback.
>>34784861>Look at me I'm so above everything that I feel the need to tell other people that I am above them.Nigga stfu bitch. Lmfao, bros really out here on /adv/ trying to aura farm. Get a fucking life. Kek.
>>34784751Sometimes its better to realize when things are hopeless and give up. Rather that than trying over and over again to feel loved and falling into despair everytime you fail.If you can accept that you will be alone. There is peace in that. For me, its easier to give up on love altogether than to lie and pretend it will eventually work out.
>>34785088i was asleep
>>34785118I won’t accept anything I’m not sure about. This feels like an elaborate way to feed my selfdestruction instead of helping me get better.> than to lie and pretend it will eventuallymanage your expectations and be realistic seek others opinionand im not asking for love, i just want a connection with friends or a partner
>>34785104lmao i thought it was kinda funny>>34784861you are everything i want
>>34785998hitherapy is a scam for people without friends to basically talk to themselves and have the therapist bounce your thoughts back to you, so it isnt too different than you using ai to normalize your thought processes.real friends will play ping pong with you and bounce your thoughts back but in a different direction to keep you adept and on your toes.if you want to meet other people like from here id suggest jumping to the other boards./soc/ though its more nsfw shit/vg/ has groups that play games togetheri think anime has watch parties as well.if you have a phone/pc there's vrchat just to talk and hang out with others. i suggest the pug world since its pc (and i think phone) only so it has much less kids. last i was there there was a guy going on a monologue with 10 people listening so it was very low investment. they even have church worlds so some place you're more in the background and can jump in when you want. its more of a similar cup of tea to this place and a way to practice talking/listening to others. if you fuck up you can always just delete account and start another so very low risk.some people in vrchat are very mentally ill though so be careful. theres groups in the game that hold more exclusive events for meeting people so pretty much everyone is in your shoes.4chan also has an unofficial dating/friend site called duolicious. its like 10 men to 1 woman but people have met through there especially if you're ambitious.im sure there's other suggestions im missing where you might find likeminded people to hang out with.there's irl ofcourse. groups/clubs are usually accommodating of new blood, since most people are doomscrolling on their phone all day
>>34784861>My life has significantly improved.how has your life improved? just sitting it out isn't better. have you met any other friends or gfs who also avoided the covid shot? do you have a job/money source that encourages you that you dont have to hide your true beliefs? life is a game, and you, and I, have decided to sit in one spot because the rest of the game is broken. is that really better? we're not going to off ourselves or we would've already, so now what? just look at the screen and wait for the clock to run out?
>>34786017>>34785998>>34784751are you the same person from a few days back?
>>34786009>This feels like an elaborate way of feeding my selfdestruction instead of helping me get better.>helping me get better.You've made it pretty clear that the only way you are getting better is if someone cares about you. And if you want that, your only real option is going to new communities until you eventually find someone who cares. But you have already said that you are tired. And that you are between desperately needing someone and being on the brink of giving up.You said giving up entirely is self destructive, but isnt being stuck in this state even worse? Do you want to hear that you should push on despite your exhaustion, or that there is some solution hiding behind the corner? Is what other people think of you everything you want out of life? And even if you got it, then what? No amount of love or affection will ever undo or make up for how your parents treated you. From what I read you show signs of attachment avoidance, always being in between needing people and shutting them out. Its clear you don't want this to feel loved or to be in love, you want to feel worthy and accepted. And if you go down this route, you will be dependant on other people validating you in order to be happy.TLDR: get a cat.
Does your mind often race with thoughts? If so does this cause you problems?
