Every single time I smoke weed I end up going over why I broke up with my family 9 years ago.I smoked THE TINIEST amount last night and swore I was going to just play games and not listen to my thoughts, but again I started writing down why we fought, what happened, trying to figure out how we went from a sometimes happy family to me leaving them.There was a lot of abuse over the years but I can't figure out how I came to change my mind about them. And this happens every time I smoke! And I only smoke crumbs of weed and it's like 3 puffs max! And once every 2 weeks max!Why does this happen? Can anyone else relate / had something similar happen? No matter how much I try, I always end up just chasing my thoughts and thinking about this when high, even when I'm not thinking about it day to day when sober.
>>34812575Weed isn't really a recreational substance. It can be but there's a 50/50 chance you get an experience like you described.
>>34813686It should only be used as a spiritual tool
>>34812575It seems like the only advice you need here is "Don't smoke weed".
>>34812575It’s trying to tell you you need to focus on healing, unsupportive family can cause tons of issues if you aren’t grounded enough. What can you do to recover some strong supportive relationships that can carry you and give love through hard times?
try delta-8 THC instead of delta-9, you may need to get it in edible form, it's the one that has huge doses like 2000 mg as opposed to 50 mg
>>34812575Your animal brain thinking about something is its way of trying to fix what it considers an ongoing problem.Something happened back then that hurt your feeling of self worth. It's not the abuse you went through but the feeling that you're still waiting for an apology.There is a problem that you still need to fix but the only way you can reclaim your sense of self worth is to make contact with your family again.
>>34813757You're a spiritual tool. If you weren't sick, you wouldn't need spirituality.
>>34813777Good idea.>>34813882No fuckin way. I'd rather die than do that. Contacting them years ago started half of this shit. But thanks for the other advice.
>>34814667Alright but consider the subconscious goal of you replying to me. Is that not your brain trying to stay on the same course, while also being curious about "what if"?You could have just ignored my post and taken the other advice, but you chose to bless my dopamine receptors with a (You)So since I'm a good person let me return the good deed and encourage you to at least consciously think through what your options are. For the record I think the other anon gave great advice but in my opinion you're pushing away an ongoing problem
>>34815024No offence, but you're an idiot.
>>34816732>what's two plus two and give me a proper answer not this "4" nonsense
>>34816987Sandwich
>>34812575Weed fills ur endocannabinoid system, makes u feel calm and relaxed like you're at home, perhaps you remember the broken feeling of safety from your familyDo you think that sound about right, anon?
>>34817571Nah, I just keep retracing my memories cos it's as if I'm remembering scenes from a film but can't remember the general story, so I'm trying to piece them together.>wait, why did that event happen?>how come the characters were in that setting then ended up in a completely different one again? What happened in between? >why did the protagonist make that particular decision ?Last session I actually pieced it all together and could remember why and how we went from horrible family to happy functional family to me freaking out and abandoning them. Somehow, I'd just kind of accepted the new happy family that magically transpired after I moved out the home as an adult and forgotten all the abuse that happened throughout my childhood which we all just let go and never acknowledged.Weird. It just all came back and I was like, "Hey wait a minute, what the fuck was all that?! "If anyone's been in an abusive relationship they thought was normal then later suddenly realised it wasn't, they may be able to relate.
I can relate op, I have issues with my family too and it’s easy to go down the rabbit hole of trying to determine things that have happened in the past. Ultimately I’m happier now but these things cross my mind from time to time
Weed is some weird shit bro. For me it gives me the same feeling after I just came. My body just heavy and full of this warm glow. But if I smoke just a tiny bit too much I get sent waves of unrelenting anxiety and get the same feeling I would have gotten as a child sent to the principles office. Delta 8 is amazing because it gives you this body high and spares you the anxiety. I would recommend getting some if you can because they are banning it in November.
>>34812575>I smoke weedFound your problem
>>34815024You insist he contacts his family assuming they’ll have the same heart OP does. There are vile family systems out there that create nests of shitheads that need to be avoided at all costs. All recontact will do is retraumatize much of the time
not OP but 2 months ago I got a bit too high and then I felt like the walls between memory and imagination became scarily thin. It didnt break but stuff was going through. As if I saw different versions of small events happen and I wasnt sure which one was real. Anyway since I stopped smoking but I still spiral like OP about stuff but sober
it just means youre a pussy nigga that cant handle a little mild ass weed
>>34827619Go back to school timmy
>>34812575You probably hold some subconscious emotional guilt behind that decision, probably caused by your upbringing less so than your own developed opinions and beliefs.
>>34828970says the middle schooler that can't handle weed, get some hair on your chest nigga
Sounds like a general mental health issue, weed probably doesn't help but it's not the weed causing these thoughts
If your thoughts are ruminating on this singular idea from your past. Instead of trying to push away the thought, let it come in. Ask yourself if this thought is serving/benefiting you, is there any new information, etc. Often there isn't, that's when you actively shift thinking into something productive- write, listen to music, dance, drink water, go outside.
>>34827619being able to handle a lot of weed is almost always a sign of low IQ lol Dumb fucks can just smoke blunts and never get freaked out.
>>34830191youre right, this little faggot is probably super smart!https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pfg1E9d8vH0
>>34812575Obviously there's something unresolved regarding your decision to "break up" with your family (um your family are not someone you "break up" with they're your family whether you want them to be or not)And obviously you should try and resolve the situation by potentially reconnecting with them to see if something can be mended and reconciled or to confirm to keep your initial decision intact of avoiding them
>>34816987source on image
