I am friends with an ugly failed normie out of pity. I am his only friend & he bore the brunt of normie sadism so I just felt bad for him. He is a failed normie bc he still tries hard to be like a normie. He repeats normie tropes/politics, frauds as a social butterfly, & is crippled with massive FOMO. He was always annoying & clingy so I stopped enjoying our hang-outs a long time ago. He wants me to drive us everywhere bc he is too germophobic to use the subway, is always mad/stressed abt something & spends half the night talking to his mom on the phone. He recently complained that we did not do anything for his birthday this month despite not even remembering mine almost a year ago kek. I let that slide since I knew he was not a bad person & because his life is already shitty. I don't expect much from him.I took him to a casino as his bday gift, since he always wanted to go with me. I paid for the ride there, for one of his drinks & even let him gamble with some of my cash. As we are sitting down, he is kind of tipsy & I get up to look at the floor below us. When I sat back down, he remarked that I had a bald spot. I did not mind at first, but he made a big deal out of it and I felt like he was trying to make me self-conscious. He asked when my father started losing his hair, and I said in his 40s (iirc) which is normal for a man. He said "Nooo thats not normal. That's not good. Me, my father and grandfather all have full heads of hair." He then asked if my siblings were balding. He had a tone of condescension and feigned concern when saying all of this. It felt like he was trying to make me insecure while puffing himself up. I was benevolent to him for years bc nobody else was, and all it took was a bit of alcohol for him to act like a normie sadist towards me of all people. Alcohol can reveal one's true colors, after all. He still calls/texts to hang out but I don't want to spend more time with him. Thoughts?
>>34842701All incels regardless of what makes them incels, are assholes. Ive befriended and got to know a lot of incels from r9k and the like. And they are all vile and mean when the moment comes, regardless of the friendship you foster with them. The difference between normies and these incels is that, normies understand the social cues of being nice, they understand it tarnishes their reputation and their friendships. Incels believe they are owed and that the way they talk about and to other people is justified for whatever reason they are incel(manlet, ugly autistic ect.).
>All incels regardless of what makes them incels, are assholesNot necessarily true. I have other truecel friends and I enjoy spending time with them. I honestly think the friend in my op is a clear-cut example of a truecel/failed normie who genuinely wants to be a normie to the point where he becomes a caricature of one (hence the normie sadism out of nowhere).
>>34842720>>34842811
>>34842811you're possibly on the money
>>34842701It took me until my late 20s for me to realize that every single time I’ve ever given another guy the benefit of the doubt and a chance at friendship, it was already over before it started. That is to say, when you both are on the same page and “worthy” of being each other’s friend, you jump right into being friends like you’ve always known each other. If that isn’t happening pretty much right away then there’s a reason and you were ignoring it because you wanted to make a new friend more than you were truly paying attention. At least that’s how it is for me.Last time I tried to do this, a guy down the street seemed pretty cool and I thought it’d be nice to have more friends close to home. Not even 30 minutes into chillin, he and his housemate are talking about their trans friend and how awful deadnaming is and just all kinds of shit. Which is truly crazy because we’re all very clearly biologically male. Then went on to talk about some other insane social issue stuff and I just smiled and nodded, maybe added a thing here and there, until it had been long enough that I could head home respectfully in correct timing. so that hopefully they didn’t notice their ridiculous opinions were why i was going. Maybe they realize now, I don’t give a fuck, but I didn’t want them to try to debate me when I just wanted to get the fuck outta there.I probably could have seen what this guy believed the first time I talked to him if I had been honest with myself, though.
>>34843375Were they assholes to you though?
>>34842701And let me ask you this - why are you so invested in this friend? What type of parasite are you? Be mindful that there are some people who have nothing going on in their lives so they parasitize on others as a means to feel better about themselves, they like having the moral high ground and being the judge, while having nothing going on for themselves because "this isn't about me it's about him"Well I'm calling you and them out - quit parasitizing on others and having your nose all up in their business and decisions. You're not his mom, and "friend" is a meaningless title - you're simply a person who exist in this universe and he's another person who exists in this universe and none of you have the right to bother the other, and if you are bothered by him you are encouraged to cut off communication respectfully, just tell him you're not interested in going out anymore and that you're going to take time for yourself. End of the line dude, you don't have to go into explanations and make it into a big fight because you don't matter in the grand scheme of things, life isn't a movie, you don't have to go Turkish drama and tell him you're breaking up with him. Do it the western way where you don't tell them it's them but they kinda know it's them and you don't give a timeline for when you're coming back and then just disappear from their lives. But quit being an asshole and parasitizing on another person's existence, that's toxic af behavior you coon
>>34842701I still don't get what a "failed normie" even is because from your story you sound a lot more normal than he does OP. Which is not an insult by any means. So I don't know why people here always want to race to the bottom with these labels.
>>34843943No and it was for that reason that I wasn’t an asshole to them. No snide remarks or rude faces on my part. I finished up and left amiably and will find other friends now. They deserve friends who are all in on them too. That’s just not going to be me.
>>34843984>why are you so invested in this friend? Like I said, I just felt really bad for him. But you know what, I am willing to concede that you have a point. I was perhaps getting off on the fact that I was a selfless savior. But trust me, if he disappeared from my life right now, I won't feel that bad. As for cutting off contact with him directly, I am honestly kind of afraid to do so. He is actually petty and spiteful when he feels wronged so maybe he will try to get back at me in some way.>>34843990It's a guy who failed at being a normie but still tries to be one.
>>34844098you're doing him a disservice by keeping up this act. you're just promoting bad behaviors.i didn't read your op but i wouldn't want to be your friend knowing you're putting this spiteful retard on because you feel pity for him.time to move on. what's the worst he could do to fuck up your life?if you want to help him, be upfront with his problems and tell him he needs to change. you're undercutting yourself by making compromises with behaviors of his you find pathetic.
>>34844107>i didn't read your opRead it then lmao
>>34844107Another thing I should mention is that this guy has a hard time taking "no" for answer. He is undiplomatic like that. I won't be surprised if he tries to make things a little challenging for me if I just cut ties
>>34844098>It's a guy who failed at being a normie but still tries to be one.Yeah gee thanks OP, I could have inferred that myself.What I mean is I don't see how it applies to your story. I guess it comes down to what you see a "normie" as...which is a cringe term I would never use to begin with.
>>34844131you're arguing with yourself and ultimately your 'strategizing' is going to lead you to playing playing limbo to meet his peculiarities.you're going to end up being the losergive him a dose of his medicine and be upfront and move on.you're fucking up this guys life by being a nice guy when he acts naughtyand you're fucking up your own by putting on the act.if an /adv/ thread needs more than 10 responses to set op straight, you're usually cooked anyways and incapable of help because you're too busy playing retarded games with yourself to have 20/20 vision on the issue.tell him he's an asshole and he needs to get his act straight or he's not worth being a friend.you don't have to play babysitter or red cross because he's had a shit life from some other brownie scout situation.stop making yourself out to be a bitch.>>34844111no. i don't need to read your blog to realize you're shooting yourself in the foot.are you wanting to even "help" this faggot by calling him out or just spare yourself an explosion for lying to him all these months? if it's just the latter, run for the hills and don't look back.
>>34843375I don’t particularly like trans people but asking people to use the name they prefer doesn’t seem like a monumental task. They’re like 1% of the population yet political discourse is centered around them and actual issues like affordability are ignored.
>>34844132It is an appropriate term for the guy in my op. He used to have some friends in high school and was somewhat sociable, however they all left him eventually and he experienced some bullying along the way. He accrued lots of insecurities and mental issues on top of already being ugly (he is a khhv at 29 and never went on a date). So now, he feels like he missed out on having a fun social life so he is desperately trying to regain that with me (and tries to flaunt our friendship on social media). He still enjoys acting and thinking like a normie despite being unable to achieve the fun life he wants.
>>34844163>spare yourself an explosion for lying to him all these months?Read op's post again. He has been putting on this act for years apparently lol
>>34844859you're implying i read it a first time.op's incapable of help since he fled the thread after this point.like i said, you're generally beyond saving if it takes more than 10 replies to screw your head on.he's gonna continue living in his self-sacrificial fantasy.he'll probably be back here in a year with a new thread.
>>34844163What if I just ignore him without an explanation, and give him bogus reasons why I can't hang out with him if ever asks?
>>34845266it's a pussy method, and it shows you really don't care about fixing his problems since he will be left confused.but it works and the method most people use today anyways, so play your own morale compass. but you should move on however you do it. you're 100% not benefitting anyone in your current position.
>>34845354>its a pussy methodAfter getting disrespected like he did, I don't think op has any obligation towards this failed normie. If someone disrespects you, ghosting them would be justified. This macho shit is cucked
>>34844179It’s not that it’s too difficult. I just don’t want to be around people who are that or support that. I don’t think they’re bad people, necessarily; I just do not at all want to be friends with them.
>>34845679I guess I can relate. I resented pretty much everyone of my coworkers at my animal hospital job. They were a bunch of annoying bitchy women. I ended up disliking the friendly numale who humored them too. The tism really sucks the joy out of everything huh?
>>34845582you're right. i forgot to account for modern testosterone depletion
>>34845836>The tism really sucks the joy out of everything huh?I’ve been wondering back and forth about this one. I do meet and read writing here from autists who seem entirely joyless. I wouldn’t consider myself that way but that’s because I’ve always enjoyed having fun with others and seeking thrills.But the tism does prevent certain things. For example, I can outwardly lay low when this kind of conversation comes up and get out of there. I can never lay low inside my mind and pretend I don’t hate it, though. I’m not really worried about the reactions of others because I simply will not tell them I disagree. If they started getting forceful, I could always switch to directly lying about it until I was out of the situation. I spend enough time on 4chan to know how to parrot a narrative and move on lmaoOn the other hand, it doesn’t feel limiting at all. The length of my life is directly limited and I don’t really want to spend it with lukewarm acquaintances. I’d rather spend my time finding solid friendships based on immediately mutual respect.Truly and honestly, the story came to mind simply because of how shocking it was to me. Even in silly woke-world, it’s not common at all to meet a group of fellow white dudes who want to talk about how bad white men are in private as a virtue signal to… nobody. I’ve never seen it at all before that, in fact.The biggest thing I was trying to express is that you’ll both know right away if you’re deeply compatible as friends.
I am a failed normie/mentalcel and another failed normie that I know rejected my friendship.Is it over?
>>34842701My sister is the same way, a pathetic failed normie. Any time we go out in public or a social situation together she gets super insecure and anxious and then throws me under the bus as some self-destructive defense-mechanism. She can't think of anything to say, so she starts "playfully" insulting and humiliating me to whoever is around and then laughs like a retarded narcissistic bully. I can't believe she still acts this way, she acted that way as a teenager so I just wrote her off and did my own thing. Now we're middle aged and she's still a retard. No husband, no kids, no friends, only people who are forced to have a relationship with her, i.e. family and coworkers. Now she's going through a midlife crisis and acts clingy and annoying and begs me to visit her or talk on the phone when she's been a c* to me my whole life.But it makes me feel good to remember that she's' a loser and nobody likes her. She has wandered through life like feeling like a reject and everyone is mean to her for no reason, or because she hasn't gotten enough plastic surgery or something.Anyway, the moral of the story is a lot of people are hopelessly personality disordered, it's not your fault, don't take it personally. Just avoid and cut them out of your life. Most of the time when I've tried befriending a "fellow" social outcast they end up being some twisted wannabe failed normie who is incapable of healthy relationships. Instead they just wanna drag down into their crab bucket of being a energy parasite clueless narc BPD type nightmare human.
>>34846080>Most of the time when I've tried befriending a "fellow" social outcast they end up being some twisted wannabe failed normie who is incapable of healthy relationships. Instead they just wanna drag down into their crab bucket of being a energy parasite clueless narc BPD type nightmare human.FINALLY someone who understands me. How did it go specifially?
>>34846118You're just looking for validation to hate on this dude don't you? Just stop man. You're being a dick. Let it go. And ignoring him because you fear retaliation is bad. Taking time for yourself is the best. You're busy, there's nothing special happening you're just focusing on yourself. Say that and move on, no fancy explanations, he will let it go eventually. Fuck. Stop being a retard, pleaseYou're becoming what you hate
>>34846080>>34846118I try to be nice to them, think of fun things to do, places to go out. Then if we go out they'll be like "aww, look at those retarded teenagers over there. I wish I was friends with them. I wish I was here with someone cool that brings me social status [instead of you]". Meanwhile I thought were having fun hanging out together.Try to watch a movie or tv show together and they keep making obnoxious negative comments. One chud nightmare human I made the mistake of befriending just kept ranting about a female character, about "why they keep shoving this trans stuff down our throats??" Meanwhile the actress was not trans, she was simply tall.The concept of being friendly and kind, and having chill fun just doesn't exist for some people. Instead they want mind games and drama. Gently correct something factually incorrect they said and all they care about is they feel embarrassed/ashamed for being wrong, and they get triggered and act like a dickhole because they always need to be right and have the last word. Facts and reality don't matter to them, just ego and neediness, and wistfully longing for illusory social validation from people they hate and fear.Just don't be naive. The more integrity and altruism you have your heart, the more shocking it is when you run into how messed up other people can be. Never forget that the goodness in you is not in everyone. Especially avoid people who are constantly putting themselves down. If you try to be nice them they see it as permission to energy vampire off you. They start unraveling and revealing new layers of how they are toxic nightmare humans, the mask comes off.
>>34846080>>34846193Kek, you work for the darkness. Or you are one of them. "Don't talk about how toxic people behave! [Though terminating cliches]" If you are not interested in the conversation eff off instead of being a condescending dismissive twat.
>>34846259I see. Thanks for sharing. The failed normie in my op always finds something to be pissed off about when we're out. He still raves against an ex-mayor for the condition of our roads kek. There was this one time where I was driving us home because I felt sick, and he was practically negotiating with me to not end the night. He even suggested that I go the bathroom at my home, then come out and drive to some restaurant as originally planned. When I said no, he was disappointed. I was the one apologizing lmfao. This is the moment where I knew something was up with him. Who negotiates this??? Other times, he felt really sick himself, and I told him I can drive him home or call him an uber. He refused because he did not want to end or "ruin" the night. He ended up vomiting at one of these moments. I think he is just so socially starved that he is willing to stay out with me no matter what, even if that means ignoring how we both feel.It's to the point where I don't think he even enjoys our outings. He is always huffing and puffing about something, yet he still wants to hang out often. Something is not right
>>34846433It doesn't get better. Just slow fade from his life. Be glad he's just a friend and not someone you are stuck with like a family member or roommate. Don't try to reason with him, nor try to make him understand himself because then they just get triggered and act even more nutty.Sounds like borderline PD. And even if it "officially" isn't, the same fundamental problem is there: crazy person lacks basic self-awareness, self-control, healthy sense of boundaries, ordinary events make them feel like they've been abandoned/they are going die. One moment they act clingy, and the next moment they hate you. People like that, their nervous system is damaged from childhood emotional neglect and abuse.
>>34842701Bro ur balding get over it. He said nothing wrong you just overly sensitive and insecure
