I'm M28, living in a big bad country on a low-mid paying job, which, at least, keeps me safe from being a cannon fodder for Uncle Poo. Been diagnosed with mixed anxiety-depressive disorder last year and since then been holding on prescripted meds and some activities that I've took through this period of time. Of course, this wasn't and still isn't enough to change anything, so, as I've read from all the usual sources, a therapy seems like an obvious way, unless there are any other things I could do here. I've tried CBT and IFS methods with therapists for 4 sessions each, and it didn't do anything but felt like an embarrassing waste of time and money. So, is there any other methods of therapy or self-help for my shit?
>>34910218How is your disorder holding you back in life?
>>34910218u madd
>>34910245The mood and mental energy is constantly low, can't enjoy pretty much almost all of the stuff that other people usually enjoy doing, even if those are on the same level, age and culture as me. The stuff that I like doesn't really last long in terms of fulfilment, and I have no desire to explore and try new things even blindly, because I can't help but expect them to be lame at best. So I have no real skills or talents to show to the world as well as any evident accomplishments. Because of this, the low mood my self-esteem is zero to none, and I feel alone and isolated among other people, them being parents, gametable buddies, coworkers or students that I work with. And I fear for my future, for I know that my current state of things will not last forever, but I will not be able to be prepared for these changes ahead, so at best I'll stay miserable or I'll fall down ever further than now.
bump
>>34910284>I can't help but expect them to be lame at best.>So I have no real skills or talents to show taken together, thats just cowardice masquerading as apathy. what caused it is unclear, but caring about having skills or talent means you place value on the idea of having both, but are too afraid of failure and disappointment to put in any effort to get either.Did you suffer a major failure, or watch someone else?
I'm finding that journaling helps. I'm writing two books with it. The first book I'm working on right now is me examining my symptoms, why I'm so messed up and exactly what my problem is, what caused it. Then the second book will be about what I think the actual solution to said problem should be, about working through a resolution.I don't know why but journaling makes it a lot easier to get clarity on what's wrong and helps process things. It also helps to write a portion of the book, stop writing for a brief bit, then reread the existing portions. Also being high off edibles while writing sometimes helps, because it gets the mind into a different headspace I think.
>>34911533> too afraid of failure and disappointmentYes, I am very afraid of those, and I think everyone is, or they just lie to themselves about it. I do consider myself a failure in life, because, as I've chose not to live like anyone else from the majority of people (otherwise I would be whining about that in any other thread here, lol), I have nothing to live by any other way.>>34911608> being high off edibles I see. Well, that stuff is illegal where I live, along with other narcotics.
>>34910218try ketamine
Bump
