How do you know what your true self is and what parts of you were shaped by what you were "forced" to become?I grew up as a tall, brown-ish tomboy. From a very young age, I was aware that I felt unattractive and beastlike from the other girls around me. I sometimes wonder whether that made me retreat further into more "masculine" behaviour and interests, because I had already internalized the feeling that I didn't really fit into the role of the pretty, delicate and feminine girl.Now I am an adult. I have physically changed and look different from how I did as a child. But I still have many of the same boyish tendencies. I get into physical fights with people. I instinctively carry things for smaller women. I have a strong desire to dominate and to be physically intimidating or never back down. My clothes are all baggy and I have own pair of shoes.I am wondering if I would have turned out the same way if I had been short and cute? Has anyone reflected over things like this and come to a conclusion?
>>34914474It doesn't matter. Don't focus too much on this "self" shit, it's mostly neurotic noise perpetuated by new-age inspired therapy culture. The bottom line is, you are life experiencing itself. Your body is female. Whatever you do in your life, whether that's things considered "feminine" or "masculine" doesn't matter, because you're going to always be seen as a woman doing them. A female dancer a female boxer a female singer a female electrician, no matter what you're female. The performance of femininity or masculinity is just performance. But it's based on reality, male and female. Humans perform in hyper masculine or hyper feminine ways, unconsciously, to attract mates. And that's it. The reason why the girlies were being super feminine and doing make up and trying to be all pretty princess-like was for two main reasons: To attract males & to wage intrasexual social war against other females. To make men simp and mog other girls, that's all there is to it. As loud and visually eye catching that sort of femininity is, it's arguably the shallowest form of it. So be thankful you are a woman with actual depth to your character. >T. Older man w/ wife & kids and has seen the 'self' grow from nothing
>>34914474>How do you know what your true self is and what parts of you were shaped by what you were "forced" to become?that's all nonsense. there is no true self. your sense of self is emergent and contingent on any number of things that change over time
>>34914485>>34914494But consider a man who is born weak and very short with a high pitched voice. He becomes a "femboy" or something along the line. Was that his choice if he had been the option right from birth to become or present as a normal, masculine man?
>>34914526>But consider a man who is born weak and very short with a high pitched voice. He becomes a "femboy" or something along the line. Such a man would be a retard. Because everyone is born weak, strength isn't magically bestowed it is gained through physical exercise, whether that's at a gym or through a lifestyle that naturally involves a lot of heavy lifting or work. The "femboy" is still a man, only a man with autism who can't understand the relationship between process and outcome.
>>34914526Neither of those outcomes matter, because both are incidental rather than essential. It's like asking "what kind of person would I be if I had blue eyes instead of green eyes?". Tomboy, femboy, normal, blonde, brunette, none of that matters because it's all purely surface level. A person's essence is their moral character, not the color of the clothes they wear.
>>34914754I do think it matters because if you never realize that this was your "inherent" personality and you got forced into a different path through circumstances... then perhaps going back into that direction would ultimately make that person happier.
>>34914474>I am wondering if I would have turned out the same way if I had been short and cute? Has anyone reflected over things like this and come to a conclusion?You likely would have been different, your sense of identity and inner being develops when you are younger and while it can change slightly overtime, it’s rare that it will change so drastically
>>34914474>How do you know what your true self is and what parts of you were shaped by what you were "forced" to become?There is no such thing as your "true self" in the way that you mean. There's just who you are. How who you are came about makes no difference. If you don't like who you are, then potentially it can be changed; but who you are is all there is.
>>34914474>I grew up as a tall, brown-ish tomboyIncredibly hot, perfect female archetype
>>34914850Wouldn't the true self be what emerges when one has freedom to explore all directions with no or little pressure?If a man grows up on an island with only other men, he likely will end up gay or bisexual. If there is no chance for woman ever or even no idea of women. Most people would argue they are kind of forced into that position. But if the same man grows up next to men or women - still picks men, then you'd say this is his true leaning.
Tall girls can't be tomboys.
>>34914896What do you mean? Tomboy just means a woman who dresses, acts and likes stuff boys typically enjoy or do.
>>34914802That framing doesn't line up well with reality. If there's such a thing as an inherent personality, then that personality would have to be ignorant, selfish, impatient and unjust, since that's the state that all mankind is born into. Man learns how to grow beyond his initial selfhood by pursuing an ideal Self. Or to be more accurate, as he grows wise he abandons self in favor of selflessness. Happiness is always found by growing beyond self, never by miring yourself in it.
