My mother has depression ever since I can remember, apparently she developed it when she was a teenager. She is also a hypochondriac believing she had cancer every now and then and going down many depressive spiralsMy dad being an alcoholic back then stressed her out even more so she insulted me by saying I was causing her sickness and killing her, essentially (to a 7 year old child, btw)When I confront her about this she just swifts the blame, says she doesn't want to talk about it, justifies it by saying I was a problematic child and upon asking her to elaborate she just said I didn't want to do my homework etc... she also dismisses everything by saying that I shouldn't dwell on the past despite the fact she still acts like this to this day
>>34914535Women.
>>34914535Be grateful she didn't murder you. You don't understand what it's like to be a mother. All mothers want to murder their children and deserve a trophy for spending so many years repressing the urge. Civilization rests on parents just keeping on keeping on passing down their demons to their kids.
>>34914535She will probably never change. My mother is similar, somewhat. I have tried to discuss things with her but she avoids accountability impeccably. Her menopause probably had something to do with it. Maybe if her depression gets resolved you would have some luck (my own mother was never depressed).Basically though you are never going to change the story of her life. She is the heroine. She might love you but your picrel is illustrative. She is not the kind of person who is empathetic and thoughtful enough to take your earnest feelings into real consideration so as to controvert the way she has justified herself. As evidenced by what she said to you at 7.The conclusion for me with my mother is to muddle my way through my relationship with her, with certain barriers, until she dies. I can't tolerate the thought of her dying completely alone, despite everything she did to me, so that's the dissatisfying compromise I've come to. You might find something better, or you may need to give up on confronting her and get on with living your own life. It's unjust, it's unfair, it sucks, but you might never have the kind of relationship with her that you want, and you might not even get a clean catharsis. And there's definitely no undoing what she did to you.
