I've known this guy since 4th grade. We were really close until after high school, when he moved away with his girlfriend. I'm a 29 year old autistic virgin, I've never had luck with any girls. Met an 18 year old through work and we just really clicked. She has a fuck buddy (age 27) and I confided with this friend and 2 mutual friends from work (32M and 29F) if I should pursue this or not. No one reacted with disgust, 32M even suggested I act on it. I knew it was a social taboo, but everything I Googled said "so long as you're both legal adults, it's no one else's business".We got to first base. She wanted to stay friends. I accepted it but felt shitty and struggling to move on. During this, my friend meets and talks with 32M. Apparently I'd never mentioned her age to him and he was disgusted by me even considering an 18 year old. He sent me a message an hour ago about how disappointed he was and left a group chat we were in.I sent a single long apology back: saying I didn't mean to keep the age gap a secret, why I did what I did (no one I confided in said otherwise) and Iām truly sorry and that if he needs space or doesn't want to associate at all, I understand. I feel so fucking shitty I don;t know what to do.
>>34972570kill yourself
>>34972570just remember to point out to everyone it's *technically* hebephilia
>>34972719Am I really such a shitty person/friend?
>>34972725Does your friendship need to depend on this guy's approval of whoever you're sleeping with?
>>34972764He's been one of my closest friends for years and he's supported me through so much. I valued him so much and maybe he's right: maybe I as a nearly 30 year old shouldn't be interested in 18 year olds?
>>34972783Dude. It's not about him being right or wrong here. Do you value his insight into your other relationships?
>>34972787I value his opinion. It has also got me worrying what other friends might think if they find out to.
>>34972790Then you have your answer. >don;t know what to do.You want your friend back
>>34972794I've sent an apology to him. Left it to him if he wants to talk/take distance/leave. I know I've done everything I can, but I don't know what else to do with myself. I feel like a shitty person.
>>34972783>>34972790Also, I'm scared what other friends will think of me because of said 18 year old.
>>34972812If your other "friends" leave over this, they were pretty shitty friends
>>34972804If he's also a sperg, he doesn't want an apology. There's an order to the universe spergs like to imagine real. They'll feel like liars if you try to get exceptions.Give him affirmation. Tell him that he's right. Then remind him that you didn't get with her. She's friend material instead of gf. >he was disgusted by me even consideringThat standard is not fair to you- especially since you're the one choosing friendship. Get your other friends on board. As long as you're accepted by them it'll be fine.I hope you weren't bragging about getting to first base because then idk
>>34972862My apology:>Hey Anon,I just wanted you to know I'm not ignoring you and want to apologise, it wasn't until reading this back that I realized I don't think her age came up with you. My intent was never to mislead you; it just never occurred to me. I'm really sorry to have not made that clear.I've only told you and a couple mutuals between her and I (ages 32M and 29F) and her fuck buddy is 27. No one shared any disgust at the time. Of course I knew it wasn't socially acceptable/taboo; but I genuinely didn't realize to what extent. You know what I'm like, I google shit when I'm unsure and it said "so long as you're both consenting adults". This isn't to excuse my behaviour nor to pin the blame on others as I am in charge of my own actions and mistakes. I just felt it important to explain why I did it, not that it was okay.Thanks to you, the above isn't a mindset I hold anymore and to be further honest with you, I decided I shouldn't associate with her going forward. It hurts to let a friendship go, but it feels like the right thing to do given everything that's happened. Speaking of friendships, I cannot emphasize enough how sorry I am to have hurt you. Not just letting you down but to have not told you the age prior, I can see how that would make you feel lead on/taken advantage of.
>>34972889I read it. I want to die.
>>34972892Too much?>I want to die.Me to, no job, no love life, living with parents with $45 in my account as I can't find a fucking job. Not where I want physically.
>>34972889>4chan told me not to want to diddle a childAre you sure you heard that correctly? She's *too old* not too young. Remember the best thing about high school girls is even though you keep getting older they stay the same age.
>>34972947>Child18 is an adult.
This is a troll thread.
>>34973134No, I was just genuinely an emotional wreck at the time. Having time to think about it, I realized I didn't do anything illegal and that it's a matter of opinion/ personal issue.I hope with time he'll accept me back. But I've made my apology and that's all I can do.
>>34972990not to a 27 year old
>>34972570your friend is a retardnext time go for the min age of consent
>>34972812It's a very large age gap, but not unheard of. There are plenty of long term or successful relationships that span 15 years.The question you need to ask yourself is where do you see this relationship going. It's probably early to consider but all relationships are a trade off. If this were 60 years ago, you'd be asking this question about a negress, kyke or something.Personally, 12 years is a bit much for me esp at 30, but at 40 and 50 it's a totally different question. Consider if you are 45, alone, want kids, and you meet a 30 year old. She's basically your best option. 40+ females are no longer child bearing and you're still fertile.Honestly, this type of age gap used to be incredibly normal because an older man can provide the financial security a young woman needs to rear children.That said, outside of raising a family, I wouldn't even consider it. Kids these days are fucking retarded and the generational gap is too much, unless you are also retarded, which might be the case. ymmv.
>>34972570He is angry because he is sexually repressed. It's perfectly normal and healthy to want to date a pretty 18 year old.
>>34973730Why does the law change if you're 27 nigga? Lol, lmao?
>>34972570Does your friend know you're still a virgin? I feel like he should cut you a lot of slack just for that. You still apologized for a relationship that never actually happened.I don't know anon, you did your best, but I think this friendship meant more to you than it meant to him.
>>34973921He does. Having the time to reflect, I'm not sure what I really apologized for; for a legal relationship that didn't happen? I talked to a couple mutual friends about it and they think he overreacted.
>>34974088It's pretty bad you're so controlled by emotional responses of other people. I should know, I was like you at 30. I finally got over it at 40. I'd fuck and impregnate a 18 year old. My family and most of my acquintances would disapprove, my friends (few old dudes) would not. However, I'm no longer interested in meeting people. I'm content with my own things.
>>34973785Why do women age like shit?
>>34974307Honestly I didn't want to lose such a long time friend, but thinking about it, did I actually do anything wrong?I didn't actually do anything and even then, we're both legal adults.
>>34972570its ok. sometimes people move apart
>>34972570UPDATE TO THOSE WHO CARE:Said best friend unfriended me on Discord and snapchat. I beat him to it on Facebook, steam, etc.More pressingly, my close cousin seems to have unfriended me on Discord. I sent him 1 back thinking it's an accident, the only problem being they're both good friends and currently at a convention togetherI'm losing everything because I showed interest in an 18 year old.
>>34974977These people weren't really good friends if they're gonna drop you over this nonsense. Their behaviour is absolutely over the top and you didn't do anything wrong.
>>34974977Brother. Listen.1. There is absolutely nothing wrong with dating an 18 year old. That's an adult.2. Normies are completely brainwashed about "predatory age gap relationships" despite the fact that there's nothing wrong with them, legally nor morally, as long as both are over 18.3. That dude wasn't actually your friend at all. An actual friend would say "DUDE FUCK YES!!" when they heard about you smooching up at 18 year old.4. You're not losing anything. The trash is being taken out. Let them take themselves out. They were never your friend.In the future though, just keep the age secret, don't let these pompous uppity normies know. They'll clutch pearls because it's extremely trendy at the moment.
>>34972570they're not your friends. 18 is old enough to die in war or be arrested but not love a man? fuck that. fuck them. they were never good friends.
>>34972719It's not even technically ephebophilia, let alone hebephilia.
>>34974977Cousin added me back. Not sure what that was about...I get that losing a "good friend" isn't the end of the world. But I've been having all these other things (no job, lonely, aimless) and this bombshell really hit me hard when I was already down.
>>34976267>this bombshell really hit me hard when I was already downHe 100% knew you were down and still kicked you anyway. Guy sounds like a total snake.
>>34976272I was about to argue otherwise. But he knows I'm unemployed and on anti depressants for a reason. I hate that things ended this way, but the more I think about it the less sympathetic towards him I become.
This is all I'm planning to say about this. As far as I'm aware, we're no longer friends. Even if they try to reconnect, I'm not sure I want to.He told a mutual friend of ours; said friend reached out to be about "pursuing an 18 year old?" We talked it out; making his discomfort with the age gap known. But I'm still friends with this guy. My cousin also didn't like the large age gap, but we're still on good terms. I've decided not to pursue relationships with 18 year olds going forward. I don't think I've really done anything wrong, but it isn't worth the hassle.What hurts me isn't that my (ex) best friend didn't support the idea of dating an 18 year old but rather that's all it took to end over 20 year friendship overnight. That I'm a "disgusting predator" who has "disappointed" someone I once cared about deeply. Despite being in a bad place, I've never killed myself purely because I don't want to hurt the people I care about. But when someone you valued deeply cuts contact with you because he sees what you did as so wrong, you start to worry what other friends will think. I was the closest ever to killing myself because he made be believe that everyone would hate/leave me and that my last reason to live would literally be gone. If my dad wasn't here, I might have gone through with it.Never thought I'd say this on 4chan of all places, but thanks for helping me see I'm not a bad person for being rejected by someone of legal age...sound dumb, but I needed it.
>>34977059Glad you could see the light and get through the shitty situation anon.Im a new poster in this thread, but I read through, and you did literally nothing wrong. That guy who's angry seems like he's trying to socially destroy you. And for what? For going on a date with an adult female? Is he a psychopath? I genuinely dont understand the reaction of him or your cousin who unfriended you at all. Iirc without rereading, youre 27, right? Imagine if instead of 27 and 18, the age gap was 29 and 20. Two years older. I think in these people's minds that would sound much better just because there's a "2" now, even though the age gap and maturity level is still nearly identical. With this comparison you can see how ridiculous theyre being.There are obviously problems in your life that you need to fix (you said youre poor), and you sound dependent on other people for validation due to a lack of self confidence. Those are the real things you need to focus on in your life anon. Don't worry about these retards who were never good people. Being content with yourself is ultimate freedom. You sound like you have a good soul and a good head on your shoulders. I believe in you.
>>34972570This shit has gotten so weird. No one used to care. You wanted to shag an 18 year old. Was she hot? If so then yeah it's completely bloody normal. You went for it. Was she mentally retarded? If not then you did nothing wrong.
>>34972889You need to genuinely kill yourself. Your friend is not some moral authority and if he's going to shit on you and his friendship was conditional, then he's not a real fucking friend.
>>34974977They weren't real friends, lol.
>>34977059>I've decided not to pursue relationships with 18 year olds going forwardYou don't need to cuck yourself out of that.
>>34972570>. I feel so fucking shitty I don;t know what to do.He's a brainwashed faggot. I say that as someone who only has interest in women older than myself.There's no evil penis magic that makes it suddenly rape.Holy fuck why are zoomers like this
>>34972570>I followed my biological urge to engage in sexual activity with a consenting adult and my friend is heckin maderino about it>>34972889Wow I almost felt bad for you but holy shit you genuinely need to kill yourself. You don't need to justify these actions to anyone, nonetheless come groveling like a begger for forgiveness. You should have just stuck your ground. Even better you should have just not even acknowledged it because, again, you just engaged in adult things with another adult. He's gone forever but that's good.
