>Should I get back together with the mother of my children?hello frens; I am a 34m with a 32f who is the mother of my 3 children 11,9,7 we had a troublesome breakup where i felt it necessary to cut contact for nearly 2 years I only saw her at court twice, in the last 5 years ive only seen her 4 times and have not had an in person conversation with, I never lurker her social media or messaged her. however I moved to a new apartment and since then she began to invade my dreams, slowly since june she has been increasingly pleasant to me over our co-parent communication app, I spoke to a friend offhand comments she made which I felt were to annoy me, they thought they were hinting that she wanted to get back together..skip to tonight, she messaged me a few very long messages asking a hypothetical question about her friend, who has children and was thinking about wanting to get her family back together she asked if i thought something like that was possible? it feels like she is strongly hinting she wants to get back together, I dont know how i feel, is it worth it so i can see my children grow up ? or do somethings dont go back together again? I dont even think she still loves me, or is just missing the past or something... I keep having this dream I end up at a random restaurant and the waiter brings me to a table and its filled with people and shes there and she asks me to sit down, om a chair next to her thats covered in coats and purses, so i try to walk out the restaurant but walking on level ground is like climbing up a mountain.
>>35017004Do you really wish to go back to someone who was fucking other men while you were away? Might as well disown your kids at this point if they're going to stay with that whore.I understand that you yourself may've had a mom with a whore past, so embracing whoreish women in your life may seem like a nothingburger just as it may've been the case for your father. But on the offchance you did have a good ma and pop, do you really wish to cuckmaxx?
>>35017057>Might as well disown your kids at this point if they're going to stay with that whore.Opinion rejected. Children should never come into the crossfire of their parents bullshit and be abandoned. Sounds like you abandoned your kids in the first place anyways OP and are only thinking of pussy instead of them so no don't get back together. Die alone.
>>35017004>troublesome breakupThis in itself would be disqualifying if you didn't have kids.>feels like she is strongly hintingShe's asking, straight up, though not necessarily for direct reasons.>I dont even think she still loves meThen no.Your children have already suffered and then acclimatized to the separation. Getting back together with her *just* for your kids, if she doesn't love you, will just make them suffer all over again when problems reemerge. And you yourself will be hurt, too, if she doesn't love you.>worth it so I can see my children grow upDo you not see them very often right now?>dreamsThat's not exactly a pleasant sounding dream.Ultimately you have no idea why she is approaching you again or what the past five years of her life have been like. People can change a lot in that time, and also may stay exactly the same in a lot of ways.A lot depends on the nature of what "troublesome breakup" means, but also on what she's been doing for five years and why she's suddenly approaching you now. I don't think you should make any overtures yourself. Let her be more clear before you decide whether to even entertain the possibility. If you don't think she loves you, don't do it, regardless. If the problems during the breakup are likely to recur or can't be moved past, then don't do it.
>>35017176you sound like you came out a vagina that 100s of men had used for fun after fucking the buttholes of pigs, dogs and donkeys.
>>35017233Go back to /gif/ disgusting degenerate
>>35017280My bad. Never knew I was actually talking to a literal child of whore who'd slept with over 9000 different entities, from bipedal street shitters to quadrupedal street shit munchers.
OP Here, I decided to post the messages for context. I don’t really want to be with her I just want to be around my kids, too be honest.. but is it worth it to try for my children’s sakes?? I try to just live my life separate from her and see my kids biweekly 1/2
>>35017495I don’t know what she’s talking about, is this a veiled way of gauging my willingness to go back?2/2
>>35017495This is a direct question she's asking you, it's not even veiled or implied. And you should say no, because I believe you're too autistic to be in a relationship with a slut.
>>35017497Dude just run. You're not ruthless or Chad enough to even begin to work with this. Do you pay child support? Do you see yojr kids?
>>35017057The whore that is turning your brain to mush is you
>>35017498Thank you for the candid response, I agree, although I will admit, I have had other relationships and women since our relationship ended. >>35017500I see my kids every other Saturday, the child support I pay is basically negligible, just under 200$ USD a month. I have been invited to come with her and the kids to see my daughter’s cheerleading competition. Is there a way I can 3rd option this as being friends that we can enjoy our kids events together without having to have a relationship or is that impossible with vvomen
>>35017517Being "friendly" in a sterile way, and going to the kids' events is not a bad thing. The kids will appreciate that and will probably do somewhat better in life as a result. I would recommend not "catching feelings" for the ex wife though, and don't make any promises or hints to the kids about where this is going because the ex lady's behavior is out of your control and you guys broke up for some dramatic reason already
>>35017527Thanks for the pragmatic advice anon
>>35017517I would want to be more involved in my children's lives than every other Saturday.At the same time you cannot just stumble back into this especially if you have no interest in her, though it seems you know that.If you've been with other women, then you're probably stable enough not to immediately catch feelings for her even if you were to see her.There's no definitive answer to this without knowing who she's become since you last knew her. Keeping in mind that in any initial meetings with her she'll be trying to impress you.There's also no way to know that this isn't some weird cynical manipulation on her part.I think that if you want to be more involved with your kids, you should try to do so, and getting along with her is probably the only way. You don't need to get *with* her, and if she makes that a condition for more access then it's a good sign that you shouldn't do so.
>>35017004Yes! Get back together. You can always break up again.
>>35017004At the end of the day OP, you need to put the kids aside when you're considering this, and consider your wife as a woman. Why do women tend to go back to exes? Generally, it's because they fail to find anyone better. If your (ex) wife could find a head and shoulders above you upgrade, I'd guarantee she'd never be making these overtures. She wants you back because you're the best she can do, she realized it after spending a few years out in the big bad world with strange dicks, and she's using your feelings for your kids to help sway you back which is kind of fucked up. But that's just how women are, they're emotional manipulators and won't see it as a big deal to get what they want. Ultimately OP just explore legal options for seeing your kids more - can't you appeal this in court or something?>>35017517The fact that you can only see your kids only one day out of every 14 is fishy to me, no offense OP but it sounds like you're leaving out some details about your contribution to the divorce. Even a halfway-decent strip mall lawyer should have gotten you at least weekly custody if not more. The only times I've seen custody this badly reduced is when the parent is a liability, either from drinking/drugs, domestic abuse, or something else bad. Soooo what's going on?
