When I was in 8th grade, I had a huge crush on a girl who turned out to be a gigantic bitch. I asked her to dance with me at a school dance and she rejected me rather harshly. Back then I was unpopular and massively socially awkward. I hated being alive, but she mesmerized me with her personality and beauty. I guess I had failed to see her less fortunate qualities. I was such a dumb kid.Anyway, after being rejected by her, the most beautiful and popular girl in the school and her best friend, also a beauty and quite popular, asked me if I wanted to dance with them. Heartbroken, I politely declined, but I forever after loved the both of them for the kindness they showed me in one of my darkest moments. We never really hung out afterwards, because I had my own group and friends and was generally very busy with them, but I saw the most beautiful one a year later at my new school. She was in tears and told me she was pregnant, then wandered off before I could collect my wits and respond. Her boyfriend had gotten her pregnant.I felt very bad for her.I saw her later at a grocery store. At least I think it was her. She seemed ok, but was with people so I avoided bothering her.I found out decades later that she had died just a few years after that. I never knew.I never got to say goodbye or thank her for being there for me and apologize for being such a socially awkward kid that I didn't have the nerve to say anything I really wanted to say.So here goes. I hope she can see this from Heaven.Magon...I'm sorry for my failures. I am grateful to have known you. You were the best person I ever knew. I will always love you for the kindness you showed me. If you can see me, please forgive me for my failings and mistakes. You were the best, most decent woman I ever knew.
My dearest love isnt even lost yet,but I'm already grieving like it's over. I dont know if I'm even coming home. You told me yesterday you wouldnt be ready to talk until Nov1st. Now I wont be ready by then, maybe never will. You were so kind, funny, affectionate, happy in the beginning. But that stopped as soon as the baby came and I needed help. Maybe I didnt ask in the nicest way, but rolling your eyes wasn't nice. Calling me names wasn't nice. I dont think you're a bad person, I think you need help discovering what your values are - finding your self worth. I have my own growth to work on.It feels like we're in a bottomless ocean and we're dragging eachother down. I'm trying to find the shore and I hope you get there too. I thought I could help you, but I have to help myself first.
Halloween is my favorite weekend of the year
>>35050650Whose baby is it?Who is the father?
>>35050703My husband. He's like basically everything I ever wanted in a parter - He's the whole package and more. Tall, dark hair, healthy/not too sporty, smart, nerdy, has a career, house, fun/funny. But he chooses behaviors that hurt me and I'm too burnt out and pregnant to even try anymore.
everything is grey and there's no hope that it'll change
>>35050736Tell him in a well written letter.
>>35050835It wouldnt matter. Showing my vulnerability to him has always been detrimental. I wish i knew how to help him want to change. I think the damage has been done, we've both hurt eachother and it's time to just coparent. I feel relieved in a way he's not (hopefully) disappearing from our lives completely. I worry me leaving is going to cause him to do something regrettable but these are his choices. He's almost 40 and I'm not making him do anything.
probably not right for this thread but she flaked again today so now it’s done as far as I’m concerned
>>35050126I met a girl and it was love at first site. We were both madly in love with each other. It was a long distance relationship but not too far.It ended because we saw each other so rarely and it was always so sad. All I had to do was get my fucking license, so dumb.She was so kind and beautiful, and I know it sounds shallow but I never slept with her despite getting the chance because I was such an idiot and I regret it. It's not just that I missed out on that experience with her, I missed out on the opportunity while all my friends were doing it and it made me self conscious for years, not to mention I missed the chance to do it for the first time with someone I was crazy about.It really hurts now because I was such a creepy loser when we broke up and there's no chance of reconnecting. It's been 14 years and I still think about her. It doesn't help she's still single and beautiful and kind. I want to message her so bad but that's just the retarded loser inside of me.I think back then I was severely autistic and I've gained just enough self awareness to realize everything that happens and be tortured by it now. It hurts so bad, still. It feels like that was my last chance for a normal life.
>>35050995it's not on you, man. trying to start anything long distance is incredibly difficult. but it still crushes you all the same when it falls apart.
>>35050126In my early childhood, I was dealt bullshit card after bullshit card. Eating sleep for dinner, sleeping in our car at random highway rest-stops, being abused by my stepdads, having a broke mom that robbed me of any childhood savings I could scrounge so that she could buy cigarettes. As an adult, my parents mellowed out, and started to do moderately well, lower-middle class. At the age of 30, I now look to the future. I'm giving up my dream of being a game designer in this AI slop economy, boys. I'm about to go enroll to work a trade. Wish me luck.
it's over.
>>35050650>I'm trying to find the shoreMike is her shore
>>35050736He abused you and from what you said he did to the infant is worthless trash person.
>>35050995If this is a larp then don't worry, m still love you m.
Back on the godpill. Kinda just realized you probably want to be left alone, and that’s fair. Call me if you need me
