Exposure. Be around people, observe how others do it, try shit yourself, fail, try again, improve. Etc.

I learned all that shit as an adult sperg at work too and I burned out hard trying to fit in all the time. Some people can learn it and not burn out, so I don't want to dissuade you from trying. Just saying it's important to not be too hard on yourself and take good care. Do NOT ignore warning signs.

Can you explain why you can't do those 3 things you mention? Do you try? What do you feel when you try? Do you fuck up when you try? Do you prepare or just wing it?

>>35073129
>Do you try?
I just fucking lock up lol
my brain short circuits and then I either wait for them or find an exit
I always assume it's some extension of a fear of rejection (eg. I ask how someone is -> "why do u wanna know u fucking freak?")
it's irrational, baseless, and catastrophizing which makes think it further spirals into overall anxiety issues
I loathe the idea of anxiety meds (already take adderall begrudgingly) and am working on some things to try to address that (decreasing caffeine intake, quitting nicotine, quitting weed) but I feel like there must be more I'm missing

>>35073129
also completely forgot the other questions, getting sleepy my fault
>What do you feel when you try?
already touched on it a bit but just anxiety, fear of embarrassing myself, etc
>Do you fuck up when you try?
also touched on this but the handful of times I haven't choked have been perfectly fine hence why I call it baseless
>Do you prepare or just wing it?
I've noticed every time I try to prepare saying specific things I just fuck it so I'm trying to train myself not to

>>35073129
>>35073532
I wrote this like 5 times already and keep starting over. 3am now so I'm just gonna dump it on you. Note that I'm just a sperg, not an expert.

1. I didn't use meds because I believe there are no shortcuts. I could be wrong though. >>35072747
is definitely right.
2. Scripting conversations is BAD, but banking up basic lines is GOOD. Probably even necessary. Categorize them like initation ("morning y'all", "hi", "Frank!"), replies (some lie about what you did in the weekend), and exit strategies ("gotta go, talk later", "I'm off maybe we'll talk during lunch", "not now dude I gotta focus"). Just make sure you don't chain them together when you prepare or practice, then it becomes scripting again. Reuse them.
3. Never think when somebody asks how you are, just say good/swell/great. Never answer in the negative even if you were just diagnosed with ass cancer on your dick.
4. Don't start a conversation to give a compliment. Only do it in passing, like when you're leaving the meeting room "thanks for the help in there" literally as you're walking away. Not every remark has to be a convo. Also don't give big compliments, just small shit like that. Big compliments ("I really appreciate what you've done for me") always get weird.
5. Don't be too intense. I tried to come across as disinterested or bored to compensate for actually trying really hard. Look away at a passerby while talking to sometly all the time.
6. "what are you up to today" is more intermediate as that's an open ended qestion which is more difficult. Try starting with "morning Frank did you have a good weekend?" and not "morning Frank how was your weekend?". Then work your way up to the more open ended stuff.
7. For the love of God if you start sleeping less, have more trouble solving problems, stress out more etc. Take a big fucking step back. Stop trying for a while. Take a few days off. Call in sick. Anything. Don't burn out. Look up autism burnout, it can destroy you for years.

>>35073757
I fucked up point 5. I tried saying something like
>For example, when talking to someone its ok to look away at a passerby for a few seconds before you look back at the person or their screen or whatever.
>Don't talk too fast, don't reply instantly, don't go high pitch
I fucked up there. But I'm sure you get the point.

>>35073516
You have to realise that there are dickheads out there who WILL act like you're a freak, but it says more about them (asshole, probably snooty upbringing, potentially unlearned themselves), than it says about you (still learning the ropes). You'll learn after encountering these types a bunch of times how to brush them off and shit on em in a dignified way.

>>35073757
"Morning Susan, how's your sex life?"

>>35073757
>I tried to come across as disinterested or bored to compensate for actually trying really hard.
heh I'm also extremely guilty of this one
I have some of the more basic aspects down (like I can handle eye contact and keeping it short enough to not be weird) but
>but banking up basic lines is GOOD
has unironically never crossed my mind, I've always toed between fully scripting what I say or just fully blind
useful info here, thanks anon

>>35073992
that's the worst part is that I'm not even especially bad at actually dealing with bad interactions
it's like it's easier to cope with that than it is to hold my shit together in a positive one

>>35074684
Well then it's about just making any excuse to start and continue a conversation for as long as possible. Then a smooth closer for when you run out of conversation.