I'm 23m, and I've been struggling with my relationship with my mother and my family environment for around six years.For a long time, I've felt undermined, dis-enabled, and constantly attacked, almost as if I were living in a state of war. I felt like my life was being steered toward chaos and failure, with little room to make my own decisions. The emotional exhaustion eventually turned me into a husk of a person, almost like a zombie.I decided to move out and live on my own. It was something I wanted for years, and I genuinely felt I needed it for survivingSince moving out, I've started feeling like myself again. I've found some peace, regained control over my daily life, and experienced a sense of freedom I hadn't felt in years. It's almost as if my colors are finally coming back, and a part of my personality that had been dormant for years is waking up.Yet maintaining distance has become a struggle of its own. My mother has been trying to reach me through relatives and friends, asking about where I live and attempting to re-establish contact. Other family members and friends keep pressuring me to reconcile. I've even changed my number and blocked or ignored many relatives, yet the pressure continues.Sometimes I give in and make contact, only to deeply regret it after. It brings back overwhelming emotions, anger, and distress. Even hearing someone mention my mother or suggest reconciliation can trigger me and make me go crazy.I almost feel a hint of guilt. But I experienced some borderline machivilian sociopathic malicious acts from her (ask me about it you'll be surprised)and the coldness I experienced definitely left me scarred for life.I sometimes wonder whether I'll ever escape this emotional cycle, but I keep reminding myself how different I felt during those first weeks of getting away from her.I'm genuinely looking for anyone who experienced something similar or just an opnion. How would you act in my situtauon?
>>35098844>I'm genuinely looking for anyone who experienced something similar or just an opnion. How would you act in my situtauon?continue trying to take steps to be more self-reliant, and ideally build a circle of trustworthy people who enhance or improve your life & vice versathe more self-reliant you become (materially, psychologically, etc.) the easier it will be to have good judgment & avoid making contact with your family if it's a bad ideait's a snowball you need to keep rolling, the hardest step was moving out in the first place so good job, keep taking steps it will become easier over timeimo
