I need advice from 4chan. I know I’m retarded. I’m social and can pick up girls and go on dates, fuck junkies and bitches but the second I buy a phone and get numbers I turn into a needy depressed loser faggot who needs constant validation due to years of bad relationships. For this reason I stay away from phones. How do I not be a needy bitch and ruin most relationships I get. I just want genuine love marriage and kids. I’m asking here because you guy’s probably know what I’m going through and some got over it. I’m 30 M and if I magically have a kid today by the time I’m 48 I can buy them a beer it’s really fucking depressing. I just fucked up a relationship with a hot moral Christian girl someone who hates drugs and disloyalty and who loved me because of my gay needy depression, I don’t know what to do…
I knew her for over a year and dated her for two months, not long I know, I needed a phone for work and everything went to shit. Longest relationships I had was 8 month’s continuously and 10 years on again off again between two girls one a whore, the other a junkie.
Both of who hate me now, the whore because of my jealously and depression (fuck that bitch) and the junkie because I treated her like shit and got into constant fights about her drug abuse, mostly crack and speed.
I’m genuinely thinking of signing up to a foreign military (won’t say who) and going to an active war because suicide if for faggots. This is the next best option.The whore fucked my best friend after we broke up last, I won’t forgive her or him for that no matter how many apologies. The junkie is a dysfunctional mess and I watched my mother die from heroin addiction, she used speed 2. I fucking hate it.One time 10 years ago I tried to hang myself, a different ex of mine saved my life, cool chick she’s married now with kids. I can still feel the rope around my neck and wish to die, I’m not going to kill myself but I am genuinely thinking of going to war because I don’t have a wife, kids, am officially old 30, and have nothing and no one to live for. Might as well die in some foreign conflict.
I hate my country it’s a liberal hellhole and we’re being taken over by Muslims and Indian rape rats, most our women are godless liberal whores and I can’t stand them.
Any advice is welcome, even if it’s shit posting telling me to man up, kill myself, or stop being a faggot. I’d prefer real advice but I understand where I am. Thanks.
>>35099137>I just fucked up a relationship with a hot moral Christian girl someone who hates drugs and disloyalty and who loved me because of my gay needy depression, I don’t know what to do…might be worth trying to salvage if possible
>>35099148>I’m genuinely thinking of signing up to a foreign military (won’t say who) and going to an active war because suicide if for faggots. This is the next best option.that's literally just as gay if not moremodern "wars" only exist for glowie or social engineering purposes basically, ur giving your blood and it's being used for some absolute faggots in suitsgive your life for something meaningful if you must
>>35099162I’ll give her time, I don’t know if I’ll be able to. >>35099166I was thinking of Russia because Ukraine is being turned into little Israel. I’m orthodox.
>>35099148>The whore fucked my best friend after we broke up last, I won’t forgive her or him for that no matter how many apologies. The junkie is a dysfunctional mess and I watched my mother die from heroin addiction, she used speed 2. I fucking hate it.>One time 10 years ago I tried to hang myself, a different ex of mine saved my life, cool chick she’s married now with kids.jesus christ dude>I’m not going to kill myself but I am genuinely thinking of going to war because I don’t have a wife, kids, am officially old 30, and have nothing and no one to live for. Might as well die in some foreign conflict.dont' fall for that shit, ur still obviously reeling from everything that's happened & it's making you tend towards uppity/drastic thingsyou have plenty to live for whether you recognize it or not"muh age 30 my life is over" shut up retard
>>35099174Even though I do t support Ukraine it would be fine 2 I really don’t care anymore. I’m not a very good orthodox I know.
>>35099174>I was thinking of Russia because Ukraine is being turned into little Israel. I’m orthodox.i don't know much about the topic but from what i understand, both countries are pretty thoroughly jewed at this pointif you want to improve the world you'd probably be more useful doing other things than going to some gay """theater""" of war, it probably just seems cathartic to imagine but that's a trap to get you to neutralize yourself imo
>>35099179Even though I don’t* support Ukraine auto correct fucked me.
>>35099179i think there are plenty of drastic ways to change your life, suicide/drugs/war are 3 which are a bad ideai don't know what it's like going through what you did but if you can lose yourself in some arbitrary task or goal it might be goodi really don't know man, i'm retarded right now
>>35099184The point is to neutralize myself just with more steps. >>35099176Kek I appreciate you. Maybe 30 ain’t as bad as I think it is. Idk.
>>35099193We all are retarded, it’s okay fren.
you could probably have a good effect on the world by dedicating yourself to a church, perhapsif suicide feels gay/selfish you could do that instead of war, and try to see it as forfeitting your life in the same wayi don't know much about different types of churches or if you could find one which would have much of an effect on the world, but i know "war" will do less than nothingthe real warfare is done against civilians by glowies"the pinnacle of warfare approaches the formless"- sun tzu
>>35099207Based anon this is probably the best response, I’m still weak and want to experience war though.
>>35099217My goal was to marry this Christian girl have kids and go to war anyway without telling her. The only reason I haven’t left yet is because I wanted someone to continue my bloodline. I never had a Christian background I converted to Russian orthodoxy a few years ago.
>>35099235I hate nato, and hate Zelenskyy,!I love Russia but most of my friends don’t n the Russian church are Ukrainian. Either side would do honestly but I think Russia is in the right.
>>35099184Russia isn't as jewed as Ukraine and the entire Western world combined. It's true that it's still far from having predominantly conservative legislation and a truly traditional society, but I believe the Russian administration is on the right track, despite Putin's incredible shortcomings and overall flaws.
>>35099267I’d rather die for Russia than die in Canada without a wife kids or life. My government hates me and wants me arrested or dead so our people can be raped by Indian and Muslim demons.
>>35099148Whyd ya stay with the hoe and druggo for 10 years instead of wifey up cool chick? Kinda on you for making shit decisions