>>5167350
Not climbed into the tiger cage.

>>5167351
hindsight is 20/20

File: 1760919224454334.mp4 (1.2 MB, 620x990)

1.2 MB MP4

>>5167350
I do the ol' spray and pray.

>>5167350
Not taking a literal retard to the zoo is a good first step
Failing that his wranglers were just as retarded for leaving him alone too long

I wouldn't have done anything, I would have listened, because thats what nobody did

>>5167356
What kind of person willingly becomes a tard wrangler anyways? They cannot be fully right in the head either. Especially if it´s men. And women don´t have the physical strength to control a fully grown retard.

>>5167369
I the UK we import "skilled workers" to sit on their phones all day near the tard and not interact with them in the slightest.

>>5167350
Tiger can't attack if you're facing it

>>5167350
>the guy actually died
huh, from the video it seemed like the tiger was too retarded to know how to kill prey, guess it got its shit together after all

>>5167350
I'd just dodge or parry whenever the tiger tries to hit me and then punch it when I see an opening. Not sure how anyone could job to a tiger but I heard the guy was retarded or something so I guess that explains it.

>>5167354
damn, how can you beat that.

Video?

id simply have just shot him while he was climbing the fence and saved everyone time and heartache

>>5167350
Another victory for the Chow Rebels

>>5167389
Apparently at one point the tiger clamps down on the lads neck and drags him off, i hear this was the coup de grace

>>5167354
Need Dale Gribble screaming "POCKET SAND" as the hippo sharts itself and it would be comedy gold...

>>5167350
Honestly if I ever found myself in a situation like that is probably get up off my ass as soon as I could to make myself bigger and be able to move, and punch the tiger in the nose or poke at its eyes to either piss it off more so I die faster or hurt its feelings so it goes away and sulks...

>>5167350
I would just give up lowkey

>>5167350
Definitely do not cower. Tigers are solitary animals which puts them in a different realm of predators. They do not let things go. They will give 110% to something seemingly impossible and accomplish it. I believe the only option is to attack it first, as in run at it looking big and try to make it think it should fear you. Playing dead won't work. Mountain lions are my only frame of reference, and you have to scare them. Cowering is just going to get you killed, but it's a fucking tiger... I don't know how you wouldn't.

>>5167350
Not being an American

>>5167354
This video is AI btw.

File: Untitled.png (1.18 MB, 817x865)

1.18 MB PNG

The tiger is gonna be the new star of the zoo

I feel like if people would bumrush the enclosure so that there's a big horde of people, the animal attacking the person would probably flee and the keepers could get things under control without either having to harm the animal or just let the person die.

>>5167464
Okay, you'll be the first one to charge at a tiger. Don't worry, we're right behind you :)

>>5167440
the perfect crime...

>>5167350
Ask the tiger if it ever worked with Michael Mann and die as I lived - an annoying movie guy.

>>5167350
what else can you do when some idiot prey offers itself up as a free meal? I'd dig in and enjoy.

>>5167350
Don't turn your back on it, throw incredibly vicious single punches as you are backing away toward how you came in and shouting aggressively in its face would have done it. Oh and not be retarded ofcourse

I'm so glad the tiger is alive and well

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>>5167481
>>5167440

I don't really understand all the people online being like "I'm just glad the tiger is okay" or "I hope they don't punish the tiger". It's not an out of control dog, there was never a question of whether it would eat someone if it got the chance.

>>5167485
see >>5167482

>>5167486
I literally have no idea what that heat map is, which is maybe why you're posting it. For some reason it's making me think specifically of the ones you could access on the old Bungie website for Halo 3 maps. I suspect it isn't that.

So what is it?

>>5167434
No, leopards can actually do an instant 180 with their bodies like that

>>5167487
Sure you don't.

>>5167490
I image searched it and it's a "meme" about politics and empathy. I still don't know if you're saying I'm expressing too much or too little empathy, and whether it's towards the chap who was eaten or the tiger itself.

The point I was making was that the zoo management weren't going to suddenly go "oh shit! tigers kill people!?" and have it put to sleep like it was a child devouring pitbull. I don't know what that has to do with politics or empathy. I don't think you do either, which is why you're getting all coy and embarrassed. You can just say you made a snap judgement, we might even get on with each other afterwards.

>>5167485
Except it's not an out of control dog, but a wild animal behaving exactly as expected?

Yeah I feel sorry for the guy but killing the tiger won't bring him back, just cause more damage.

>>5167485
A tiger in a zoo adds more to society than some retard kid, is more valuable, and is endangered. It's a no-brainer really (like the kid)

>>5167497
Yeah, that's exactly what I was saying.

>>5167498
Jeez, you're so edgy and hardcore. Do you wear ripped jeans and dye your hair black or do you let your wallet chain do the talking?

>>5167440
Tigerchads win again

>>5167501
ah nevermind, I misread the post

>>5167501
I will take your ad hominem to be a concession and a display of a complete lack of ability to refute my points which comes as no surprise as I have provided a waterproof line of reasoning and proofread it myself. Thank you anon, I enjoyed the battle and revel in victory.

>>5167505
>proofread it myself
kek

>>5167505
tard-hugging redditor BTFO

>>5167505
holy shit you ate him harder than the tiger ate the other... challenged learner

>>5167505
possibly /an/nihilation of the year, put me in the screencap

I would have tamed it, and then the tiger and I would become best friends.

>>5167505
bodied that freak

>>5167505
I don't feel much need to "refute" the notion that we should feed people you don't like to tigers. It's an adolescent and churlish idea that would only ever be greeted with eye-rolls and baffled looks irl. It also displays that you don't care about wildlife beyond it's ability to entertain you, calling into question any sense of affection and responsibility you might claim to have for tigers or other animals.

>>5167505
there's only one way back from this for you >>5167501 and that's to challenge him to a mog-off. Post body.

>>5167512
words can't cut it at this point, post body

>>5167482
>>5167486
I'm generally pretty conservative and far closer to the center of that chart, but I still care about the tiger more than some random actual retard who voluntarily jumps into the tiger's enclosure.
If anything caring about a random tourist retard over "your" tigers and your local zoo indicates you're out in the upper right of the heat map. And if it isn't your zoo it's not even applicable to the chart at all, because neither the retard nor the tiger are within your immediate sphere of concern and caring about either one in that case would again put you in the upper right of the heat map.

>>5167515
I care about my volk and my race over the lesser species we have conquered, mere beasts of the wild. Mankind is divine, and takes priority above all else. Antinatalists like you will be gutted and hanged in the streets on DOTR.

>>5167519
cringe

>>5167515
Also what would even be the point of killing the tiger? i can understand if you kill it to save the retard but if the retard is already dead then there's no reason to kill it

>>5167523
to own the libs

>>5167523
For the benefit of the living same reason we still have capital punishment for people. It's not an effective deterrent (for retards)

>>5167523
To remove a dangerous predator from society so nobody else can fall victim to it, now that it has gained a taste for manflesh.

>>5167482
the retard climbed in, he chose to be prey

>>5167560
I still care about mankind more than beasts of the jungle that we have put into zoos and hunt for sport.

>>5167389
The tiger was kind of afraid to catch what the retard had if he ate him.

>>5167498
Wanna hear some crazy shit?
There are more tigers in captivity than in the wild.

>>5167562
The retard was a genetic dead-end.
What if 50% of mankind became like him?
Society and the gene pool is better off without him
And I'll even wager that secretly his parents are relieved that their ordeal thats been dragging their lives down since his birth is over. (Ill bet thats something you want to cry about but you'll never adopt a retarded orphan).

>>5167575
End yourself, antinatalist.

>>5167581
>i have nothing to say against that, but i disagree
>i just do
>how do i deal with my cognitive dissonance
E-end yourself

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>be tard wrangler
>take tard to zoo so he can watch the aminals and screech like a pterodactyl
>tell tard to stay at table while you go get some food
>come back
>tard is gone
>see crowd screaming that a man is getting attacked by tiger
>you hear his blood curdling pterosaur screeches
>oh fuck.jpg

>>5167351
fpbp

>>5167350
Believe it or not I would simply not have jumped into the tiger pen

>>5167351
>>5167716
What are you gonna do, time travel? The premise is that you already ARE in the situation

>>5167696

imported African "social workers" are notorious for not giving a fuck, she was probably babbling on the phone the whole time

>>5167519
People like you know 0 folk dances, don't own traditional clothes, and have only a meme understanding of your own history and culture.
You will not be gutting anyone. You will die alone and forgotten.

>>5167729
post body

>>5167731
I accept your defeat.

>>5167734
I didn't know we were playing make believe

>>5167736
You should have realized that when you were samefagging agreement with yourself half a dozen times

>>5167742
audible kek I've never been BTFO this hard, you're a sharp one. There's unironically no coming back from this

>>5167523
to let all the other animals know that killing a human has serious repercussions

>>5167350
Offer sex in exchange for life

>>5167369
Former tard wrangler, here. I was straight out of college and needed a job quick. They paid well, had excellent benefits/insurance, and two of my tards were immobilized. The third walked a lot and had that eat-yourself-to-death disorder where he never felt full. I had to monitor him constantly outside of the tard center, he would eat out of trash cans and off the ground. Never had a major event with my tards, but someone else’s grabbed a small goat at a petting zoo and started dry humping it. Weird job, but not too difficult for the money, while I looked for a career in my degree field.
You have to know your tards. If I had one that could climb or had furry tendencies, he wouldn’t be near a tiger cage of that style without my hands on him. Definitely a handler fuck up.

>>5167478
>on the internet, nobody knows you’re a tiger.
You outed yourself, mate.

>>5167506
>>5167507
>>5167508
>>5167509
>>5167511
Cringe samefagging. Fucking retard at least space out your replies so it's not all in the span of 5 minutes

I would have looked the tiger straight in the eyes, done 2 or 3 slow blinks, made a big yawn, and then pretended like I was otherwise occupied and did NOT want it to sit in my lap.

>>5167767
I was in a hurry

cat was just playing with him. its a well fed kitty that probably gets kisses and is hand fed behind the scenes. if it wanted to kill the guy it could have done so in a split second.

>>5167350
Without laughing.

I think I can fuck up a tiger with bare hands

I practice MMA for 7 years now, boxing in parallel for 6 years, I could.
Not to count strength training at the gym for 4 years, 6 ft 1 1/2 for 189 lbs.

I have an insane speed, reflexes similar to my speed. I just have to wait for him to charge me, dodge his attacks, and throw good punches to his head. I won't stop, and at the smallest mistake he does, the tiger is finished.

You'll always have virgins from here thinking that it's impossible.

First, nothing is impossible with will, my friends, and 2) that's not with your weak ass bodies that you'll do anything.

Any man with a minimum of training can beat a tiger with a knife anyway.

With bare hands, that is not necessarily more complicated, it just requires technical skills.

>>5167773
>if it wanted to kill the guy it could have done so in a split second
it did kill him

>>5167783
Post body

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>>5167350
Seduce her

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2.22 MB WEBM

Can I get a qrd?

>>5167350
What could I have done? Sedate the man before he got into the tiger enclosure?

Imperialist England should return these poor, captive animals to the indigenous cultures they stole them from. This is an outrage.

>>5167794
mute autist that communicates with sign language escapes handler at uk zoo

he climbs fence and starts autistically signing at siberian tiger

tiger leaps on his back and mauls him to death in front of hundreds of onlookers

t. watched the webm on /pol/

>>5167800
Damn that's fucked up. Reminds me of the vid where that Indian retard did the same.

>>5167783
ahi

>>5167545
What? The tiger didn't hunt down a person. Its just a wild animal, kept in a cage for a reason, and some dumb ass jumped in its cage. It did what it naturally does. Theres nothing wrong with that.

>>5167800
>t. watched the webm on /pol/
a link for a poor sir?

>>5167812
Nta but when I heard the news first I went on pol to see if it had been posted, there's the one posted everywhere and another with it biting down on its neck. Might want to check the brit/pol/ archives.

>>5167765
Not in the UK. In the UK, you get less money than you get for stacking shelves in the supermarket, and most of the staff are illegal immigrants who can't speak English and can't read.

>>5167389
I think it was honestly just confused at how retarded he was behaving.

Shit like this is exactly why zoos need to be shut down.

>>5167851
because people are retarded?

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>>5167350

>>5167718
Well first I wouldn't be a retard and try to play with a 500 pound apex predator. Putting aside the fact that not being retarded wouldn't even land me in that situation in the first place, make myself look big, be loud, look it in the eyes, and act aggressively.

>>5167855
People?

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>ask what you would have done in this situation
>everyone in the thread answers not get in that situation
But how would you feel if you DID eat breakfast this morning?

>>5167350
T-pose and fuck the biggest tiger to assert dominance, or die I guess.

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>>5167864

>>5167783
Lmao seems like the tard wrangler lost another one boys yeah we'll do the lauighing.

Go play with a housecat, see if you can avoid being scratched. You'd look like a serial rapist coming out a nail salon and that's just a house cat.

A crackhead with a a single rusty knife will own you, this thing is born with a face and every limb covered in knives, you weigh 189lbs? This fucker carries a thousand pound animal up a tree.

You think a knife will help you? HAHAHAHA you might hurt it, but theres no way it lets you get close to its vitals, the moment you try to posture on it, it jumps you four claws into every limb tearing you apart jaws taking your MMA trained head clean off.

Try to catch a feral cat head on and you will see how tarded you're iNsAnE reflexes are.

>>5167505
#rekt

>>5167505
fucking destroyed that tranny

The law of nature doesn't care about autism. If you're autistic and you don't know the difference between a cat and a tiger, then too damn bad mother fucker

>>5167863
Would you rather have 100 identical posts going "nothing you're fucked," because that's the answer.
Like MAYBE you tuck into a ball and protect your neck and head and hope he gets bored before you get opened up, but otherwise there's not much you CAN do.

>>5167879
An unarmored space marine could easily kill a tiger with his bare hands.

>>5167350
Realistically? Punch it in the nose. If that doesn't work then ggs, I'm dead

>>5167354
Fucking hell. I was rooting for the leopard

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>>5167863
If you somehow ended up in a tiger enclosure I think your only option would be to draw attention to yourself and try to be rescued, in the hopes that the keepers would lead the tiger away to its holding pen. Otherwise you'd have to hope you could hide or climb something that the tiger couldn't reach but it would be unlikely since a tiger enclosure realistically would be designed to be accessible to a tiger. If that autist wasn't retarded I think he actually could've had a better shot since a big cat in a zoo would be well-fed and inexperienced enough with hunting that it might not even want to kill you, like pic related. I'd be more afraid of being trapped in an enclosure with chimpanzees or large herbivores like hippos or elephants if we're describing hypotheticals since they're much more trigger-happy. The retard literally sat on the ground next to the tiger, he could've at least stood up and tried something that would make him seem like he wouldn't be worth the effort.

>>5167389
the tiger was 30 stones (420 lb) it doesn't need to be all that smart to take down a sitting tard who's busy trying to bollock it in tard sign language

>>5167898
what if my stone weighs 10lb and my friend's stone weighs 50lb

>>5167350
scratch it under the chin, behind the ears, then go for a nice long bellyrub.
when it dozes off, slowly and carefully back off and look for the door.

>>5167900
then you're not British and do not have a loicense for your stones

>>5167811
You asked. Killing things that kill us makes us feel better. Does it really have to be more complicated? Why and how don't really matter to the sentiment. Countless feuds have started over and cities have burned over what is to any impartial observer justifiable self defense. This trend continues even into this current decade. Feels = reals when it comes to this stupid species we call mankind.

>>5167933
*tips fedora*

>>5167933
So its just revenge?

>>5167936
>revenge is ... LE BAD

>>5167936
More or less sanctioning it and making a 3rd party pretend do it is how we pretend it's not

>>5167898
Tigers have enough instinct to just go for the neck and break it. Doesn't need much intelligence beyond that.

>>5167948
what if you have no neck?

>>5167951
Tiger will probably stop and sniff around the body until it finds something else to bite

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>>5167953
tiger's bane

>>5167350
Don't act stupid and don't climb into its cage.

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>>5167790
You know that's not an option

>>5167350
>Realistically speaking, what could you have done in this situation?
Not get in the cage.
>B-but you're already in the cage!
Then death will come for me, and I will do nothing, because I can do nothing.

>>5167350
Make sure my last recorded words are "pspspspsps" and "Imma get that cat belly!"

>>5167892
>climb something that the tiger couldn't reach
Bruh, they're jungle cats. Pretty sure there is no where you could climb to that a tiger couldn't get to.

>>5168072
I know but I was grasping at straws trying to actually answer the hypothetical.

So how did it kill the guy?
>mauled
Yeah but get a little more specific. Was it a bite to the neck? Did he just bleed out? The stuff I saw made it look like the tiger was very inexperienced in killing anything.

>>5167696
Dude was apparently a child actor for a bbc show in the past, why tf did he think doing this was a good idea? Like I can't find anything saying he was retarded or on drugs or insane yet...
>>5167800
Is that so? I keep reading he was alone and asked a stranger to photo him playing with Altai the tiger. I'm baffled at the concept of the man just deciding to jump in the enclosure, crawl towards death's claws to sincerely play with a 500 pounds predator... Someone playing dumb with the chimps, I can understand where the stupidity comes from, but a tiger? Seriously? An eyewitness described seeing him wearing headphones and "pacing around" near the enclosure before he went in and was attacked. Police confirmed he was visiting the park on his own...

>>5168098
Suicide by cat. Many such cases.

Why did he climb into the cage?

>>5168095
Neck bite
>>5168098
I thought he had asked her to take his picture (with the tiger in the background) with his phone before he jumped the fence.

Anyways, he appears to have begged the tiger to interact with him before the mauling started (some sources describe this as him praying to the tiger, I would say pleading with, but who knows what frootloops think?). I haven’t watched any version of the mauling with sound, so IDK if he regrets his choices once the violence starts, but I would also call it suicide by tiger.

>>5167790
This.

>>5167351
FPBP
I'm good with animals, but that retard never bothered to earn that tiger's trust and violated its territory all willy nilly like a jeet.

>>5167350
Timmy the Tiger took out that honorary jeet.
Jeets are usually suicidally stupid.
We've all seen the hundreds of hilarious videos of retarded jeets earning Darwin Awards.

>>5168095
Bite to the neck from what I heard.
>>5168118
We don't have confirmation but it seems he was autistic and did sign language to Altai (he isn't mute) and he wasn't receptive to people telling him to get out or play dead. He didn't have a handler at the park, he went to the zoo alone. We don't know if home he was alone or had a caretaker there. It's a bit confusing on what happens before he jumped, but he danced to music with earpods, asked a couple for a picture and went in the enclosure. Yeah might be genuine autism there because he was apparently telling the tiger "no"... Like, chastising it. Which isn't going to work.

>>5168129
So...according to you...all jeets are autistic then.
Good to know. When do we lock them all up?

I don't understand why people say the tiger shouldn't be euthanized. That tiger has already tasted human blood, it should be put down.

You can't put an animal's life above human life. That is just wrong.

>>5168156
>You can't put an animal's life above human life.
watch us

>>5168156
explain how killing the tiger will bring back the guy

>>5168159
It's not about revenge or rehabilitation or dissuading future perpetrators. It's about eliminating a clear and present threat from existence so nobody has to think about it again.

>>5168164
The tiger was allways a dangerous animals. You have no reason to assume it became more dangerous.

>>5168167
It's gained a taste for manflesh now.

>>5168156
Guess what we are.

>>5168182
bet you thought that epic gotcha was a lot more clever in your head huh