You ever just have those times where your chest feels like its filled with acid and your stomach is turning every day. all you can do is try to hold it in or else you will just scream and start destroying things. all i can do is brace myself and try not to murder people for reals.I'm getting worse off and things will never get better, I just need a few shots of vodka to feel like my older self againit doesn't matter if I work hard or am lazy, if im kind or if im evil. nothing changes the outcome anyways and people dispostions are basically the same no matter how I change things up.
>>24470998Relax
>>24471029Should I drink some vodka today? I only have a little left unfortunately
>>24471032Uh, it depends, “don’t force yourself to like something that you don’t really enjoy, or you are likely to end up an addict because you’re sending your body signals that you really need to do something like it’s good for your health/survival” If you do drink don’t do it with such vigor and deep seeded need, try to unplug and observe yourself in the moment, pretend you’re floating on a body of water or something
>>24471052>try to unplug and observe yourself in the moment, pretend you’re floating on a body of water or somethingRight. I should just imagine myself smelling roses while I rot in the same fucking predicaments I have been in over and over again.
>>24471059Might be nice to stop for a minute and smell the rosesMight give you some fresher legs and a perspective to get back to dealing with the issues later Any little bit you can muster are like seeds where it will expand later
>>24471064You reach a point where your problems start infesting you from the inside. It's not like how I used to experience it where I could just take my attention off with something nice and forget everything. It's eating me from the inside, in my dreams, in my waking life, when I eat, when I go to the bathroom, when I am trying to watch something, when I do anything. and it never goes away unless I drink alcohol
>>24471070I’ve been there and the suffering is part of the high And learning what it feels like to be healthy again is hard I’m not saying it’s easy but baby steps. Hang in there, you’re gonna make it
>>24471070If you do reach for a little vodka exercise some portion control and don’t beat yourself up about it, things can start to get better anyways It’s okay
>>24471077I don't feel anything from you saying any of this. I just feel worse. I don't trust you, I don't know you, and I can't recognise you.normies love to say "you're gonna make it"while their lives are completely disconnected from yours. you have zero stakes in my life. i could fucking die tomorrow and yours would be fine, i could have the worst period of my life and everyone will look away.thats the most frustrating thing. i could be mean to a person or i can be good to them, their attitude and disposition wont change it will never be anything different it's like being stuck in a game with npcs. after i insulted my sister years ago vs when i gave her money she needed later on. her attitude and dispostion never changed. no matter how much i change, no matter how much the world change, no matter what happens to me everyone else are just completely static and completley happy and have no sense of actual real to them.everyhting is getting more and more alienating and foreign to me. soon enough everything will be completely unrecognizable.>>24471084nothing is guarenteed
yeah when I have a case of the shits
>>24471097Give yourself a name so when I lose it completely one day and murder a bunch of people I can tell them you inspired me to do it. they will need your name
>>24471102yeah my name's *BRRRAAAPPP BRRR PPFFRRT* oh shit sorry *BRRRAAAPPP* hold on I gotta go
>>24471117I pray for the day you have a horrible death.Are you still in that occult server? Should I make a sigil where i wish for you to have a horrible death? it would be funny wouldnt it?
>>24471131yes you should
you ever think that making all this sigil shit is why your life shit? maybe the reason you left jesus is why you messed up. think about dat.
>>24471160>left jesuskek. I was never a christian believer to begin with.average christian is dumb as rocks and have the spirit of a dog that just blindly follows anything they are told while wagging their tail.Jesus saved some random brown whore thousands of years ago, but arent saving christian kids from cancer today
>>24471145with all your talk of shit you are going to accidentally manifest yourself dying to something related with shit, if you somehow died like that, it would be fucking hilarious. not like i would be there to see it
>>24471163i seen some satanists get whupped so bad dey die horrible deaths, dat got me thinkin bout if dere any truth to dat metaphysical shiet. of course dere ain't, but it's funny you be down some rabbit hole, tryna crawl out but you stuck, and you up there in da north doin dat sigil shit on amerifarts
>>24471174I don't even know who you're talking about, schizo, lol
>>24471178It's poetic how the most insane horrible punishments are inflicted by believers of holy religions>dere ain'tyou wouldnt know dumb fuck. kys>>24471181take your bipolar meds
>>24471189all i know bout it is dat you witnessing da metaphysical be 'cause you abuse da drugs and alcohol. dey got a perfect chemical explanation on why you had your third eye opened.
>>24471192Metaphysics is underrated not that I know much about it, but you seem to just assume low iq people take interest in it, that it's just crystals and smoke incense. In reality the smartest people in history had genuine interests in it and there is something to metaphysics, it's just not really provable like a science.
>>24471200the smartest folks in da world had interest in metaphysics 'cause they had no access to scientific inquiry like in da post-industrial world. they didn't got no equipment to actually examine da world through scientific means so they had to resort to da metaphysic mumbo-jumbo shit.
>>24471202>metaphysic mumbo-jumbo shit.Implying the edge of modern physics isn't the same. You reach a boundary where almost everything becomes theoretical. Not too different from metaphysics in the past. clearly counciousness exsists and so there is something to metaphysics.
>>24471210the problem of consciousness ain't solved yet but yall been askin other questions and they got answered some time ago, so stop actin like we just woke up to dat shiet.give it a few years scientists gon find out what the fuck consciousness is. me personally i dont even believe dat shit exists. its fake.
>>24471215You are retarded if you think scientists can solve everything given time. There is genuine proof that there are unsolvable things in math. Physics is getting more and more limited by infrastructure and budget. of course you don't believe in a counciousness, I doubt you have a soul
>>24470998not really. its more of a demotivating and self-destructive thing. not even alcohol works at this point
>>24471238I will take you out of your misery by gutting you. let me kill you
>>24471241gutting sounds sort of painful but something of that sort would be really nice of you thanks
>>24471248stare at the sunset while I gun you down from behind.
>>24471252please..
>>24471281Im gonna kill you and grant you pass to gay heaven where you get a harem of buff daddies to take care of you
>>24471292that would be so nince..