>>25269481nice try pigger
>>25269481I bribed government employees once.
>>25269481What's the most retarded data mining thread that you ever made while thieving my tax dollars via an SSI check?
>>25269481I stole spice from the Hutt cartel. Some Rodian bounty hunters are after me.
>>25269481It is sin of living alone Watching on internet people with out pants diddle genitals I eat cookies from grandmas jar and never admit itIn my sweetest dreams I walk with a gun and killing jews
I spanked my monkey
>>25269481not paying for a plastic bag
>>25269486>Reddit spacing >Complaining about women not hooking up with him. >Violent fantasies >Memeflag >Broken englishSaaaar
planning the murder of the greek spammer
stole a balloon
>>25269481Called a fed on 4chan a nigger and told him to tounge my anus.
I illegally downloaded an album for free a day before it went up on streaming. SOMEBODY STOP ME
>>25269481Suicide.
Drive stoned, now I'm cyberstalked by masons. The two thing's aren't related at all
>>25269481Breathing.
Dont respond dipshits
>>25269481Was on the FBI's radar for cyber threats.
>>25269491kek a hot air balloon?
>>25269481Stealing in a hardware store.
>>25269481>posting nudity on blue boards>racism outside of /b/ and /pol/>trolling
>>25269481i tore the tag off of a matress once.
something bad happened to me and i cursed God like never before and i regret it every day
>>25269502MMMMMMMMMMMMMMOOOOODDDDDDDDDDDSSSSSSSSSS
>>25269481For some reason when I was <5 years old, I used to just walk into people's homes. I never stole anything, I was just curious. Broke into the landlord's house and he was obsessed with these little stone angel statues.
>>25269481Drove over a cyclist
>>25269490can i come
>>25269481Shoplifted stuff worth atleast 50k+ over the span of 5 years. Food mainly.
>>25269481IT GLOWS SO BRIGHTMY EYEEEEES AYEEEEE
>>25269502savage
>>25269481I haven't thought about it in years and I feel like I actually didn't do it and it was in a dream.I'm not going to say what it was.
I shot Kennedy, it was me.
>>25269481When I was 7, I ate a gummy worm without paying for itI felt really guilty for a year straight and acted in my best behavior in all other regards. Then I admitted to it a year later and my mom was like “tell the truth sooner next time and you won’t have it rat you up like that”
>>25269481I'm an economic terrorist and have murdered hundreds of video games, movies, and tv shows by not spending any money on them. I WILL strike again>ps greek niggas need to kill themselves
>>25269481Nice try, FBIhttps://youtube.com/shorts/zeQ8Xb-Hbw0?feature=share
>>25269481I destroyed the entire universe and reset time so that nobody would know.You won't believe me so I can admit it.
>>25269481>Firing off my Glock 19 on my property in my backyard on the 4th of July, everyone thought it was just a firework, no police came to investigate the gunshot. I shot up into the air towards the sky.
None
>>25269481They forgot to charge my chips and drink for my Chipotle meal, so instead of it being like 20 dollars i only paid 13, didn't say anything and walked out
>>25269481I used to drive escorts and I beat the shit out of a trick that slapped on of them bitches. Bounced a 24 of crown off his head and we gtfo. >all of this is satire btw
>>25269507hell yeah the more the merrier when it comes to murdering the idrama labs faggot
>>25269481>burglary (stupid but justified and completely confined to minecraft)>assault (justified, and in minecraft)both in late teenage years
Apparently insulting pajeets on 4chan is against US law. This shithole is filled with shit eating pajeet jannies and mods.
>>25269481I have 64gb of RAM, but I'm only utilizing some of it.
>>25269481In the UK. I borrowed my friend’s pocket knife without a license. Still kind of freaked out with myself to this day.
>>25269481I sometimes don’t put the shopping cart back and just leave it in the parking lot
>>25269501>erbärmlich
>>25269526"Hate has no place", they said."Hate only begets more hate", they said
>>25269528To be fair we need to deposit a dollar coin in the cart and I forfeit when I commit my crime
>>25269481you don't get away serious crimes unless you're a psychopath or something similar and lesser crimes are just rules for slaves and if you follow all of them there's something wrong with you
>>25269489nice try kike
I said nigger on the internets
>>25269526untermensch piece of shityoure probably brown/mutted
>>25269481I post off topic threads
>>25269481Decades ago (long past the statute of limitations) my friend hotwired an excavator and a front-end loader and we drove them around.
I piloted one of the planes on 9/11. The one that was supposed to hit the White House. I turned it around and got back home instead.
>>25269481STILL haven't paid for WinRar or mIRC
If I told you, it wouldn't be a secret.
>>25269481Hi FBI
>>25269481I shot a man in Reno just to watch him die.
>>25269481Not really a crime per se but in high school a party i was at got busted and I started a foot chase with two cops. Apparently I was running backwards berating them for being too fat to catch me. I dont remember it much.
>>25269541I have always wanted a chance to run from the cops on foot.
A plastic bag flew out of my hand on a windy day and I was too fat to go chase it down
>>25269481Allowing jews to win. A crime I didn't even know I was committing.>evil wins when Good men arent taught shit by their slave community who is invested in all the wrong shit. Sportsball. Church. jew education. Etc.But sadly, I had to figure shit out on my own too late in life.
I shot a man before throwing him out of a plane.He didn't fly so good
>>25269481
>>25269543I always chase down my litter. I actually spend a of time picking up trash. Now that I think about it, the most serious crime I actually committed was picking up a bag of trash someone had thrown from their car window when I was running and throwing it back through their sunroof. They got out of the car and threatened to shut me lol
>>25269481I’m white, so I guess this thread is not for me.If you’re white and does not abide by the rules of civilization, you’re a shitskin nigger and deserve death.
>>25269487>I killed a bunch of people once https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0mghbVdoQv8
>>25269481The worst thing I ever did wasn't technically illegal. I gave someone advice that, at the time, was perfectly sound...or so I believed. My cousin according to my relatives was in a bad relationship with some guy who they believed was an asshole. I had no reason to not believe them.They asked me to convince her to move back home and leave the guy.I did.Later she drove my uncle to work and got into a fatal accident. She died. My uncle lived.I wish I had never listened to them.I wish I had stayed out of it.They knew she would listen to me.I should have refused.I know it wasn't really my fault, but I can't help but blame myself anyway.
>>25269481i ran a red light once, it keeps me up at night
>>25269542It's a 10/10 coming of age milestone, doing grafitti and going to house parties as a youth gives you a lot of opportunities
>>25269481I was waiting at a red light to go straight and saw the left turn signal turn green out of the corner of my eye and for a second I thought the light to go straight turned green so I let off the brake for a moment to get ready to go forward before realizing my light was indeed still red but my front tire crossed slightly over the white line. I lose sleep over it every single night, I'm considering turning myself in to the police just to finally deal with this nerve wracking guilt I feel 24/7.
>>25269481Back when eBay was a thing. I listed a Quomio laptop for $3000. They paid and I deleted the listing and my account. Did this a few times until the FBI came knocking on my parents door
>>25269481I dreamt I had committed a murder once and woke up believing I actually did it. Turned out i was just generally stressed out at that point in my life. Engineering school can be quite stressful.
>>25269553 bruh, why you copy my answer? are you indian or something?
>>25269550I'm sorry. I can understand why you blame yourself but you have absolutely no reason to do so. It would be like a chef blaming themselves because a patron choked on chick pea or something. The loss of life is always hard, and it's exponentially harder for loved ones, but it is not your fault.
>>25269481stealing your heart<3
>>25269481killed somebody
>>25269481Killed and raped hohols in Bucha
>>25269481Rape.Not a joke.
>>25269481I've been driving without a license for 25 years. Often drunk.
>>25269481Bribery
>>25269488DUDE WHAT THE FUCK
>>25269561Didn't we all
>>25269542You don't need to have committed a crime to do it. You can just start running when you see them and imagine that they're chasing you. I suspect none of the chases with cops I remember from my childhood were real we just ran away because we felt guilty and were scared shitless.
>>25269541I used to know this raging alcoholic mess of a dude and one time he led the police on a foot chase, and when they finally caught him it turned out he'd run away for no reason and they'd only chased him because he started running.
>>25269481I killed a CIA nigger by running him over on 9/9/99. I was being followed by agents and freaked out. It's okay to run-over space aliens.
>>25269481fishin without a license
I downloaded a car.
one time i went through the burger king drive thru and they forgot to take payment hehe
>>25269481Apparently, insulting transsexuals violates the law.
>>545324394Even so. She was my best friend. Probably the only person in my entire family that genuinely understood me or at least tried to.Now that she's gone, I'm alone. Even surrounded by those who love me, I'll always be alone without her in my life. She truly was my best friend.
