Share crime stories and currently relevant opportunities ITT. IRL shit, not online scamming.Inb4>muh bankers muh politiciansWow, very funny, what an original joke
>>62393307I fucked your mom.
12 years ago my first job was in a supermarket. I randomly decided to steal a candy bar for no reason, but i felt so guilty that I confessed to my supervisor a day later and offered to pay. She said it was okay, and nothing happened.
>>62393319This guy paid me $50 so he could fuck your mom.
>>62393319>>62393326Guys, guys.. OP is talking about crime, not having legal fun with mothers.Follow my example for what a real crime is. I am a candybar bandit.
>>62393326>>62393322>>62393319Gay
>>62393307I steal 30 minutes from my employer every day, making it 125,5 hours stolen during the year. That's 5,2 days of free time.
>>62393331being gay is not a crime in my cuntry.
>>62393351Wow you're such a funny guy>>62393349That's hardly crime at allI meant more like torturing someone for crypto, armed robbery etc
>>62393307I didn't do this but I know another guy that did. I worked in a major chain pharmacy while in college and worked with a guy that would have another friend phone in prescriptions pretending to be a certain doctor that often called in to the message line and leave prescriptions on our message recorder (which is legal). Most of the prescriptions were for xanax and such, and he would ring them up himself and then sell them to pill junkies. I only found out about it when I filled in another few stores and saw the same thing there. I asked him about it and he denied it, but I knew and didn't tell anything to anyone.Anyway he did this for a while and when there was the 10k bitcoin for pizza came out, I remember him being super bullish about it saying he worked 'extra' to buy as many bitcoin as possible. He would even take diabetic test strips and just walk out with them...outright stealing. He would show me them and say '2 boxes equals 1 bitcoin' and laugh at me. I was like wagging my finger and saying 'you'll learn'. Fast forward to 2017 and I ran into him at a gas station literally driving a Lambo. He said I should have listened to him and the last thing he said was 'Crime pays', and that was the last I heard from him.
>>62393307I stole a fridge magnet from a cubbyhole at my daycare when I was 5 and I haven't ever not felt guilty about it.It had courage the cowardly dog on it.
>>62393424Now this is a QUALIY post
>>62393475QUALITY*
Bump
