>be me>work at corporate job>it's progressive so we have unisex bathroom>have IBS so I take frequent bathroom breaks>always get self conscious about the noises I make and try to be quick and quiet and make sure no one is in there when I go>one day I see a qt female coworker go into a stall after I'm about to leave>she's grunting and farting up a storm in the stall>think she has IBS too so I take my time washing my hands so Ican start up some small talk when she gets out>she comes out of the stall to wash her hands and I say to her "you too, huh?">she looks confused so I explain about how I have IBS>she didn't say much and leaves quickly>a week later HR calls me in to yell at me because I "harassed a female employee and made her uncomfortable"man I fucking hate women so much bros
You tried relating over poop lol what are you a toddler
>>62646231She will think about you every time she takes a shit, but you should have told HR they are discriminating against your IBS medical condition
The power move is not locking the door when you're using the unisex bathroom
>>62646239You guys never get it. It isn't about the poop itself, it's the principle of the thing. You can't even try to relate to a foid without it being the end of the world.
>>62646231This is my fetish so If I heard a woman "farting up a storm" my dick would've been rock hard all day. they would've had to do more than just report me to HR.
>>62646231lmao i love greentexts this is why i joined this site in 2015..good one op i kek'd
>>62646231I have hella farts while pissing and shitting at work and i bust out laughing.. if i heard a female having huge farts and shits in a work washroom I wouldnt be able to stop laughing at her
>>62646231Lmfao thank you for your turbo ‘tism story OP, you got some hearty keks out of me
>>62646231Damn you're a creepy weirdo.
Imagine some loser listening to you shit and then talking about it afterwards.
You made it to r/greentext, well done OP
>>62646231>talking to anyone during potty break>talking to a FEMALE during a potty breakI'm calling your shit out
>>62646231Bro contact an employment lawyer. They will salivate at this scenario. You are being discriminated against due to a medical condition. That won’t fly bro
>>62646285even Gigachad wouldn't be able to pull off a friendly conversation about a Foids shitting and farting that she just did like 10 seconds ago in the same bathroom that you are trying to talk to her in. You are fucking insane
>>62646231>Live in major Canadian cityWhere I used to work the meeting rooms were named after Rosie Parks, Nelson Mandela, "Abenaki filmmakers", and Inuit activists, etc. Not even joking. Lasted about 3 months there.
>>62646231now you have to confront her and ask her why she reported you to HR
>>62646231I work overnight in an empty office building so I can take a liquid shit anytime I have over 10 bathrooms to choose from
>>62649325Its a pasta though
>>62646231Funny, but do office restrooms like this really exist? I call bs on this story. That said, I did work at a small digital marketing business for a few months. Only like 15 employees. My computer broke, so I was moved to a new one in a small office right next to the woman's bathroom. It was basically just one of those small restrooms with just one toilet inside. And there was one particular younger woman who worked there who would often treat me to the sound of loudly audible farts and diarrhea. Nasty ass bitch. Normally I would be turned on, but she didn't quite cross the threshold of being attractive enough to warrant that. Though to be honest, I probably still would've banged her if the opportunity presented itself.
