Is there anyone at Nvidia he didn't fuck?
>>62896638I also had an affair with Jensen Huang the CEO of Nvidia
I also let him fuck me. GPU prices are through the roof, i'm not proud of it, but i had to do what i had to do.
>>62896655are you me? I have also had an intimate affair with the CEO of NVIDIA
>>62896638Imagine being excluded from the secrets and Saliva swap on tho top floor
>>62896655The ceo of Nvida touched my asshole inappropriately
>>62896666Checked
>>62896655he tickled my pickle
>>62896638All of this shit is so fakeNo woman chinkoid wants Jensen's micropenis
>>62896638>>62896709*Jensen's chinkoid micropenis
>>62896638Will Ethereum dump another 5% on these news?
>>62896638At this point, there isn't much reason to believe these claims. Everyone at Nvidia now knows that joining in on the dog-piling of the ex-CEO is going to give brownie points with his successor.
>>62896638>the producers seriously named this guy "Huang"good joke, fellas
>>62896709idk, I've contemplated that if I were an attractive, woman, I might try to suck some rich guy's peepee so I could instantly "become rich". It's crazy to think about the kind of power you have when you have a vagina.
>>62896732women would never lie about something like that chud
>>62896781too bad they use that power for evil
>>62896709They don't call him jensen the HUaNG for nothing btw.
3 affairs is honestly king shit, yeah yeah nvda or whatever but honestly i aspire to be a sex god
>>62896638Now that he's out I feel like I can tell my story. But it's humiliating. I was an intern for Jensen and he used to leave a twinkie on my desk in the morning, and we both know that meant he expected me to fuck him on the floor of his office with my "big white cock"... which honestly isn't actually that big. But he would laugh and say "you make a twinkie out of me, white in the inside, yellow on the outside and filled with cream", to this day I don't know why I went along with it. I was young and thought I was bisexual. I'm a senior director now, and I still remember him sending me a message in teams " come to my office, open the door, get on the floor""everybody walk the dinosaur"
Back in 2024, I hooked up with Jensen Huang next to the grease trap behind a Denny’s off Highway 101.The whole time, he refused to drop his keynote stage persona. He kept the black Tom Ford leather jacket zipped all the way to his throat, sweating through the calfskin, and wouldn’t stop aggressively pitching me on sovereign AI infrastructure. Every time I tried to shift my weight, he’d grab my face with both hands, stare dead into my soul, and scream, "THE MORE YOU BUY, THE MORE YOU SAVE!" like he was trying to intimidate an antitrust regulator.Halfway through, he pulled a raw, unwrapped 12-inch silicon wafer out of his inside pocket, slapped it onto my bare back like a cooling pad, and demanded to know if I could "feel the Blackwell architecture scaling." He kept trash-talking the entire time, muttering about how Lisa Su couldn't generate half this thermal output and calling me a "legacy CPU bottleneck" while we were literally pressed up against a dumpster full of spoiled Moons Over My Hammy.When it was over, he abruptly stood up, zipped his collar tight, cackled like a man who just wiped out half the S&P 500 in a single earnings call, and clocked me square in the jaw as hard as he could. His frail billionaire knuckles bounced right off my cheek like a dropped GPU, nearly breaking his own wrist while doing zero damage to me, and he just sprinted into the fog muttering about CUDA cores.
>>62896638Notice how more women are eager to stab him in the back the more his net worth drops.
Meanwhile I'm still a virgin.Every time I read about someone having sex, it makes me feel sick.
>>62896886same lad
>>62896638>Is there anyone at Nvidia he didn't fuck?Both of his kids work there, but I'm still going with "no" to your question
>>62896638Why is everyone focusing on the fact that he had sex as if that's illegal? The only question people should ask is if he was in on the whole Chinese GPU smuggling scheme
>>62896873lmoa
>>62896873Finally some actionable due diligence here.BRB driving out to my local Denny's.
>>62896718If Jensen had sex with Vitalik (which he probably did)
>>62896638Tell me this one was at least in his or her 20s.
>>62896638Almost everyone in positions of power has affairs
>>62896655His cock is inside me as I type this
Honestly, what's the point of being a powerful billionaire if you can't fuck who you want? And are we seriously supposed to believe the wife didn't know about his shenanigans and was perhaps ok with it?
>>62896718>>62896810>>62896873>>62896972my fucking sides, best thread on /biz/ in a long time
>>62897111>the wifeLoris mills huang. That is a lady that will shortly be coming into a lot of money. All the other women that smell this will be out for blood. The disgrace and dishonour for the whole family is a fate worse than death. This is going to turn very nasty very quickly!
>>62896709No but they like money and this dork has alot of it to burn
