I've been subsisting almost entirely on Tyson chicken nuggets, Red Barron frozen pizza, Steel Reverse, and Vodka for the last year. Every time I try to cook anything more involved than boiling water I turn into that incompetent at everything guy from the as seen on TV commercials. I want to eat something different, but at the end of the day, I can't bring myself to do anything more than microwave some chicken nuggets.
>>22076637microwave burrite could be a nice solution
>>22076637You could get some hungry mens. Meatloaf and veggies or potatoes or whatever might be good for you.
>>22076637Try to make that French "chicken with 40 cloves of garlic" dish, that one always looked tasty
>>22076637Not a foodie. Even when I was a terrible drunk drinking malt liquor and hard liquor just like you I still had more ambition than that.Stuff for cold sandwiches, noodles and cans of tomatoes and butter and garlic to make simple pastas, eggs. I tried to make a run to a real store and get real food at least twice a month. They had great wine deals at bigger stores too.I ordered more pizza and ate more ramen and mac and cheese than i care to admit, but that was 20 years ago and I'm sober and slender.Start like I did with just some staple easy stuff. It's not a lot of work and you'll really appreciate it when you sit down to eat something that tastes good and isn't nuggets or frozen pizza, FFS.And cooking while drunk is fun and you're already going to be drinking.
>>22076637Assuming no larp, you are depressed, anon. I'd say you are 18-20 living at home with no prospect of a job and possibly flunking out of college. Cut your ties, thank your parents, and join the military and lay off the booze when you are done training. There's a better life out there, and sometimes you gotta sacrifice to get it.
>>2207675130, living alone in an apartment, work 3rd shift
>>22076751Cut ties? Why?
If you want to feel like a pro anon, buy one of those premade salads that you have to mix together, but also buy some extra stuff to add in. Carrots, avocado, bell pepper, whatever you like. Use a little extra dressing (or don't, sounds like you're already pretty unhealthy) and mix it in a bowl and wa-la an improved salad
>>22076751If he was living at home he'd at least be able to eat his mom's cooking. This anon is on his own.
>>22076776You're still young enough and could cut it if you aren't physically broken beyond laziness. The US Army is very comfy and would 99% take you if you aren't too fat. It's a good way to reset your life and regain some functionality. If you're lucky, you'll have a DFAC that does all the cooking FOR you. If you don't want to fight, join something non-combat related. There's a way forward, bro, and sometimes we need a kick in the proverbial balls to jolt us back into living.
>>22076794Cutting ties that are holding you back from doing some much needed self-improvement. Sometimes that shit is necessary, especially if you are being enabled by friends/family. You can always come back when you've fixed your shit and got a grip.
Here's my dinner today. Tyson Chicken Nuggets with Famous Dave's Devil's Spit BBQ Sauce, Buffalo Wild Wings Asian Zing, and Kraft Roka Blue Cheese Dressing; and vodka.
Sleep tight, steeler
>>22076637get some frozen veggies holy shit
>>22076637Check the freezer section of your grocery store for microwaveable frozen vegetables. Not going to be as good as fresh, but you just have to put them in the microwave correctly and heat them for several minutes. That’ll at least add some vegetables to your diet. Other anons suggest salad mixes which works too, and fruit also doesn’t take much preparation or cooking. One step at a time.
>>22076880Why are you drinking like this, little buddy? I'm no saint, but maybe have some water instead.
>>22076880>accidentally turns the End Of Cycle alarm on>scares the crap out of everyone when washer isI had to tape it to off because it happened so many times.
>>22076897I do drink water, usually several glasses in rapid succession after I wake up mid sleep.
>>22076808It's pretty pathetic zoggoys have to come to a cooking board to recruit meatslaves for israel
>>22076950Being a zogbot is better than being a depressed drunk living off tendies by every metric, thoughever
>>22076952You will inherit a smouldering bolder of a planet.
>>22076980I’m sure that sounded poignant in your head, but you’re coming across as a hysterical fag, bud.
>>22076950Nah, it's not for everyone. But if you have nothing to lose and live a pathetic life or you just like fraternal bonds, it's way better than eating microwave nuggets with a bottle of vodka in your laundry room. Is that where he hides the bottle?Also, basic training in the army is around 3 months + whatever job training afterward. Perfect time to detox and get sober while exercising every day. He could turn it around completely, but where he's headed now is rock bottom.
>>22076751>>22076808>just go die for Israel
>>22077054>t. commie soyjak in a polycule with a fat bulldyke and 10 other simps>>22076637You should really stop drinking and get some exercise, anon.
>>22076987Each dust Jew.
>>22076751>join the military and lay off the boozethe nigga’s going to be the biggest drunk in his family for a while before he eventually eats a bullet
Get yourself a slow cooker my dude. As someone that was following the same route you are, it really is the game changer to get yourself not just cooking but learning how to. Most of the recipes are just cut and dump but as you get a little more involved, you'll figure other techs to make some nice eats. A good roast in the slower is a hell of a hearty meal, stupid easy to make and it'll feed you for days.
