Hippopotamusly speaking if you resided in America in a less than legal way for the last 30 years and you were getting deported back to Europe in a few weeks, what food would you get your fill of during the rest of your time?
I honestly wouldn't miss any of it.
>>22183891Smoked brisket>>22183907Powerful
>>22183891You can make a lot of American good with European ingredients, so maybe like the Texas brisket, any tex mex food, Mexican food
>>22183891Dinner from the Machine Shed.
>>22183910>PowerfulNot really. It's just that, going with OP's examples: I can get • NY pizza anywhere• cheeseburgers anywhere• Americanised sushi anywhere and• steak anywhere andI can make• Tennessee Hot Chicken • cheesesteaks• chicken fried steak• lobster rolls andI don't like• smoked brisket None of this would be unavailable if I moved back to Europe except perhaps Texas brisket. Since I don't even like it, what's to miss?
>pennsylvania phillyjesus
>>22183891Milo?
Most underrated bbq food: smoked turkey
>>22183921Actually, I thought of something that I wouldn't be able to get that I actually like: American bacon. No other place makes bacon the same way as North America and I've never seen it back home so if I were deported tomorrow, it would become entirely unavailable to me and we have no equivalents. Even British streaky bacon is a different beast entirely. Pancetta, guanciale and speck are entirely unlike bacon. If I go to the Polish butcher and buy Polish bacon (boczek), that's also completely different.I don't eat it often and I'm not sure how much I would miss it but I would certainly miss it more than any of the OP examples.
>>22183937That’s the only way that Turkey is good desu
>>22183933Ooh, that's a good one.
>>22183891None of these foods are American, they are foods that are available anywhere in Europe. Americans just take an item, add a city or state to it and claim they invented it; Plus they tend to add lots of sauces and powders to cover the bland ingredients. I don't think Americans would miss anything if they moved to Europe.(except the cost and a few pounds in weight)
>>22183939There ya go
>>22183939>Even British streaky bacon is a different beast entirely.It's still the same belly pork but Americans just prefer it to be incinerated into oblivion.
>>22183891The only ones that truly have the American character are the TX Brisket, NY Pizza, MN Lobster.The rest are just food.
>>22183937Smoked turkey is excellent but I do not have the fucking patience to jump through the hoops to get it edible. I always opt to smoke chicken wings instead.
>>22184099It's really not. The American one is processed in an entirely different manner and they taste absolutely nothing alike. I like both and neither is better than the other but the flavours are incomparable.
>Nevada SushiI'm just gonna say it: AI is all of the A and none of the I
St louis cut BBQ ribs
>>22184071I enjoy these bot tier european comments purely because every euro that has come to visit me in the states for a few weeks has been summarily mindfucked out of these retarded opinions for the remainder of their lives. The only thing I really miss that was particularly pleasureable from europe were the ham and cheese sandwiches in Spain. Unfortunately that ham they have goes hard as fuck and is basically unobtanium here.
>>22184308As an euro who has been living in the US for decades now, I don't believe a single thing you said unless these euros are from some country with utterly dreadful culinary traditions like the scandies or Ireland.
>>22183921You can’t get Good NY Pizza everywhereDefinitely can’t get good Barbecue everywhereAlso, just because you like something, it doesn’t mean it’s actually Good
>>22183891>american foodI'd be glad that I'll get to eat real food for the first time in 30 yearsBut I guess Mexican or something? Idk about other parts of Europe but we don't really have any Mexican cuisine where I live
>>22184071You can’t really get Barbecue or very New Yorky pizza in Europe THOUGH
Cheesecake Factory buffalo blasts
>>22184309The thing my Italian Aunt misses most about her visit to Murica is the Vietnamese Food
>>22184315This is the real answerGood “Ethnic” cuisine is difficult to find in EuropeThe Mexican Food is hilarious, the pizza mostly sucks unless you’re in Italy, mostly, the only Asian Cuisine is hilariously bastardized “Chinese,” unless you’re in a country that had colonies (there’s good Indonesian Food in Holland, for example)Pretty much if you’re in most of Europe, you’re eating whatever country you’re in’s Cuisine, and not much of anything else
>>22184316I can. You live in some Slavic hellhole?To be fair American bbq is shit, poor quality meat slathered in sugar sauce. The Texas salt and pepper stuff is passable, but you can get better in other nations.
>>22183891we should take the cheesesteak away from philadelphia little by little. it’s a fucked up city inhabited by demons. start off by calling it a “pennsylvania cheesesteak”. then move to the “new england cheesesteak”, “american cheesesteak”, and finally “the western hemisphere cheesesteak”. imagine a future where those god forsaken people are going blue in face trying to convince our grandchildren that the cheesesteak came from philly and they just get a laugh and a middle finger in response.
>>22184331Kek no you can’tPost an example of Good Barbecue that you can getAnd no, Murican Barbecue isn’t “shit,” you’re clearly just a hilarious tastelet
>>22184346yeah I find it hard to believe that eating whole cow heads is actually some widespread thing in texas
>>22184309The vast majority of europe outside of France/Spain(including Portugal)/Italy culinary speaking is profoundly mediocre. The entire rest of the EU are failed states when measured in cuisine. I don't think there is a single european region I would choose over Chinese/Korean/Mexican personally so perhaps you could call me biased.
>>22184364if every european country’s cuisine was a huge cultural export instead of just like the top 3 then people’s opinions would surely be different. but most of us will never know what slavic or nordic is really like enough to judge, outside of trying it maybe once or twice. because we’re never exposed to it. I’m sure they have some meals I’d love but I’ll probably never find out.
>Nebreaska Cheeseburger????
>>22184373I think it is in everyone's best interests that the nords do not export their cultural cuisine. Slavic food is hit or miss some of it is what I can only describe as great depression core while some of it is bretty gud sloppa. Ironically what most of the non european world knows as "Italian food" is actually just Italian American food. If you get a pizza nearly anywhere on earth outside of Italy and many parts of europe you will be given an Italian American pizza 99.9999% of the time and there are a lot of other "european" dishes that fall under the same category. On pretty much any given day I am sub 20 minute drive from:1.) An Italian restaurant run by an Italian family making actual Italian food that most Americans cannot pronounce2.) 4 Italian American restaurants also run by Italians3.) 5-10 taco shops/mexican restaurants run by mexicans so illegal I need to understand spanish to order4.) At least 1 thai place run by an 80 year old thai grandma that refuses to die and speaks maybe 10 words of English while 3 generations of her descendant down to newborn mill around the restaurant5.) 4 but Chinese6.) 4 and 5 but Korean 7.) 4, 5, and 6, but Indian8.) A bakery run by someone who probably claims to be french trained but is probably not french so who knows9.) 2 southern bbq joints run by either a man named bubba or a man so black he could hide in the charcoal, both of which call me boss It's almost impossible to get a combination like this nearly anywhere else on earth outside of North American (including Canada). Strangely we have almost no German here in my smaller city which is unfortunate because I like Jägerschnitzel (which is how like 99% of schnitzel is served here for some reason). I know eastern european stuff is more common on the east coast while south/central american stuff is more common on the west coast but I'm more central and we have neither commonly.
>>22184312>You can’t get Good NY Pizza everywhereAnywhere. Mostly because it isn't.
>>22184412I want to call these fighting words but I'm not gonna lie both Chicago and Detroit style pizza mog NY pizza I'm afraid
>>22184329We have wenzhounese food in Italy because unlike the rest of the world, most Chinese in Italy are from Wenzhou. It's okay. I prefer other regions. But yeah, Mexican is a rarity and that's okay. I wouldn't miss it if I moved back home to the boot mostly because I rarely eat Mexican food to begin with and the few times I've had it, I was unimpressed.I wasn't exaggerating earlier when I said I wouldn't miss anything but maybe bacon. And actually, I thought of a second example: salty American junk food. American sweets? Fucking horrid. But your chips/crisps? Absolutely top notch. Honestly, chips in Italy are mostly bland. I would absolutely miss Sun Chips and taco Doritos. I eat neither very often but I would miss being able to get them if I want them. So there's two things. Bacon and chips.I wouldn't miss the drinks, sweets (because they're terrible), ethnic foods (because we have them) or much else.
>>22184420that’s insane. it’s honestly like Detroit saw what Chicago was doing with pizza and thought “how can we make this even worse?”
>>22184331For one, American barbecue, while not generally to my tastes, either, isn't shit. It's just not something I particularly enjoy but I can understand the appeal even though it doesn't specifically appeal to me. Secondly, meat quality in the US, while not stellar, is perfectly fine and serviceable, particularly the pork.And third, there are variants of barbecue that are entirely unsauced, sauced in mustard, sauced in vinegar dip, sauced in mayonnaise even and more. Not all of them are sugary, that's just the most common variant because the others are too polarising even for most Americans.I'm gonna be honest: they like their food sweet or cheesy here so food that isn't sweet is generally cheesy and vice versa. Those other barbecue variants are neither and that means they usually stay regional to where they originated. Not easy to find Carolina barbecue in Iowa or Alabama barbecue pretty much anywhere. >>22184364That's why I said the scandies and Ireland. As said in >>22184424, I'm from Italy so I'm one of those big three but I quite like Polish and Hungarian cuisines, too, and consider them criminally underrated. Especially Polish. Hungarian gets some respect but Polish? Practically nobody cares.>>22184411You pretty much describe my neighbourhood here in the northeastern US except it's more like a 20 minute walk and you can add Georgian, Kazakh, Greek/Turkish, Polish, Indonesian, Cambodian, Lao, Malay, ME/NA and Caribbean food, too. I like it all just fine, but again, I wouldn't really miss any of it if I moved back to Italy.
>>22183891>pizzaplease stop your burgers and meat are great
>>22184458Italian here.NY pizza is genuinely different.However it only makes sense if it's cheap. Else it's pointless.
>>22183891texas owns all of this. do not pretend.
>>22183891Ive often wondered this, why don't Americans eat much fish? With massive coast and largest rivers on the planet, i would've assumed fish and seafood to dominate, not beef
>>22184329You can get all kinds of ethnic food in major european cities nowdays. Keep in mind that europe is a huge place. It’s not that hard to make good pizza bro. I live in freaking finland and we have ”authentic” italian pizza places where my italian friend has said that the pizza was as good as in italy. American franchise pizza like Pizza Hut is almost frozen pizza level slop.>>22184316>>22184312I tasted supposedly good new york pizza in new york and it was just rather mid pizza. Whatever superiority of ny pizza is completely imagined by americans, a placebo.
>>22184424We have multiple authentic mexican places here in finland alone ffs. Loads more all across western europe.
>>22184424We also have good chips in northern europe. The food and specializations seem to vary a lot in europe.
>>22184532all the areas near the water eat a ton of fish. lobsters and crabs and chowder in the northeast, fish fry and crawfish in the south, oysters on the west coast. gulf coast has a lot of shrimp and generic seafood stuff going on and there's also Mexican/texmex/baja seafood in California, Texas.
>>22184532Fish literally is popular in every major population concentration, you can find a million sushi places every 50 feet on the west coast and lobster/fish and chips is extremely popular on the east. Down south seafood/crab/crawfish boils are one of the most culturally significant foods in the country. It's literally only rural interior US that accounts for like sub 10% of the population near the canadian boarder (the dakotas, idaho, ect as well as maybe some smaller parts of the midwest that have minimal fish because they're a thousand miles from an ocean. Beef is mostly just dominant because we have thousands of square miles of open plains in interior US that are perfect for raising metric fucktons of cattle. >>22184437I could destroy some pierogi and bigos rn
>>22184112You don't like to brine it for 24 hours then rub it under the skin and everywhere then stuff it with vegetables then smoke it for another 8?
>>22183891Fun Fax: Rhode Island has superior lobsterölle and seafood in general
>>22184898looks like shit just like your balding cranium and your dogshit slave-infested country
>>22184898Rhode Island exists for poor people, gambling enthusiasts, and the elderly.
>>22184902but anon I have thick flowing locks of pretty hair and you don't know as much as think you do :3
>>22184907post fursona
>>22184907I don't recommend replying to those posts there has been some weird cointelpro shit getting spammed on /ck/ lately and they're almost definitely some nation state bots
>>22184931there has long been a push in every corner of the internet to sow cultural disdain amongst westerners and it's usually incredibly obvious. it's a constant even pressure that just gradually changes the temperature and like frogs people think disdain and divisiveness are real but outside in the world it just isn't. they just start parroting the 50¢ army and russian botsany post that celebrates terrible things about your country, or causes you to distrust your countrymen, gov't, or cultural history, especially on big social media and places like 4chan, is either the decades old china/russia constant incursion or it's the mindless retards who start parroting itdone ranting now back to rhode island seafood
>>22184940post fursona
>>22184941how do I choose a fursona? or does it like, "choose me" or something?https://youtu.be/Q77sJT8O56E?si=FNNk2_Wa3pgI-Qci
>>22184949It's kind of like choosing a wand in Harry Potter but your erection will guide you.
>>22184355I'll be honest I'm a third generation North Texan and I've never even heard of that. Brisket, ribs, pulled pork, Texas Twinkies, and carne asada are kings here.They're not wrong about our seasoning. A lot of "traditional" Texas barbecue is meant to have enough salt and black pepper to blend with the smokey flavor of the mesquite/oak/hickory. You're supposed to appreciate the subtle flavors of the wood that was burned. I think most people just use whatever rub they made/bought nowadays, though.
>>22183891Is the Nevada suchi thing just a little bit of rage bait?
>>22185273It's more of a Tex-Mex thing.Barbacoa is made of head meat. I'm half mexican on my mom's side, and my white dad refused to go into my grandma's kitchen when she was making it because looking at it freaked him out.
>>22183921Incredible how even after 30 years the european still cannot expand his palate and retains the shit taste he was born with.
>what American foods would you miss?>Americans: I'm going to whine about Europe. A lot. Like a scorned little bitch.>I haven't been there - no, no. I haven't got a passport.>but, by fuck, I'm angry and it's making me all effeminate as usual!The height of cuckoldry. Pretty tragic to witness.
>>22184380It's AI, funny because it gives Oklahoma steak when Oklahoma is one of if the only state that has a burger named after it. The Oklahoma Onion burger, and it's incredible. Plus it's super easy to make at home, you should give it a shot.
>>22183921>Doesn't like smoked brisket Stopped reading here, also tastelet detected
>>22185356You nearly made it to the end of the post. Well done. Did you run your finger over each word as you read it out to make it easier?
>>22184572> We have multiple authentic mexican places here in finland alone ffs.
Only sonoran and baja style mexican food is good. If there is ground beef as an option at a mexican food restaurant, you should just leave.
>>22183921Brisket is good but it's too rich to eat a ton of. I prefer smoked hot links snd smoked turkey. That said texas bbq is in fact the best but I also like more rural kansas style where it's spicy and sweet. I dislike traditional kansas city where it's all just sugar. When I smoke meats I make it way more complex though with a ton of spices especially things like some clove, cinnamon, fennel, stuff that adds to the sweetness. I also do add ground celery seed and some cumin and then I use lump mesquite charcoal. I usually smoke just whole chickens or turkeys though because they make for good food after the fact. Mesquite smoked chicken quesadillas rule.
>>22184572>lutefiskarito>Spurdo asade>tikkos
>>22184308Every Euro I know who's gone to the US came back 5kg heavier and was shocked at the ubiquitousness of sugar. Sugary bread, sugary bacon, sugary jerky, bbq etc. I enjoy watching American BBQ videos and seeing the meat fall and rip apart after hours of slow cooking and I fear I'll never taste it, but I cope with knowing that half of that crust is sugar. I was very excited to try those honey beef jerky things you guys have and when I've been brought some they just tasted like aspartame. I have soft teeth as well- very poor experience overall.>>22184338kek>>22184890>You don't like to brine it for 24 hoursI hate that it takes 24 hours of my time to constantly be brining that fucking bird. When I lived at home I'd do it in shifts with my brother, but doing it while living alone is becoming quite the chore.>>22184411>If you get a pizza nearly anywhere on earth outside of Italy and many parts of europe you will be given an Italian American pizza 99.9999% of the time and there are a lot of other "european" dishes that fall under the same categoryNot even that. Italian American pizza would be what New Yorkers were doing in the 50s, what Europe and the rest of the world got was Pizza Hut colonization and there's nothing Italian about that.In Romania in the 90s and 00s they would sell "pizza" slices at bakeries or pastry shops, with pretzel dough or flat challah-type bread cut in half serving as the base, ketchup (because it was well Western, you understand) instead of tomato sauce, and all sorts of processed meats and cheeses, canned mushrooms and corn, peppers, olives etc as toppings. Slop of the higher degrees but I miss those the most. We're "civilized" now and use pizza ovens and actual pizza dough recipe instead of whatever leftover dough there was in the bakery. A shame.
>>22185637When I make smoked turkey on thanksgiving and christmas I just bleach clean a cooler and put it in the cooler with salt, garlic, pepper, a sack of ice, and vinegar the morning before. Then on christmas I have to wake up at like 4am and start smoking it so it will be done by 1pm. Ribs are so much faster because I just half rack smoke them and crutch them at 3.5 hours for 40 minutes.
>>22185655Yeah I was talking only about the bringing. Can't you do the whole turkey shebang the day prior and heat it up in the smoker less than 9 hours before serving? What do I know about smoking
>>22185676It's not as good as right out of the smoker. Freezing smoked meat also fucking blows. It's something to do for events really because of that, for all the effort it's good to feed a large group and have not too much leftovers. After 3 days of smoked meats your farts start to smell like smoke and you feel sick even thinking about eating more of it. I use an old school lump charcoal offset smoker as well which requires babying the temperature and smoke color all day as opposed to the osb pellet smokers that have a particle board hopper
>>22185678Yeah, I don't know. I'd never serve guests frozen food, but in my experience, most low-and-slow cooked meats are just as good reheated, and in some cases better. I guess in this case I wouldn't even see it as reheated food as much as I'd consider the first smoking a part of the cooking process and preparation, kinda like boiling and refrigerating potatoes the day prior to roasting them. Then again I've never interacted with anything even vaguely related to American style smoking so if you say it's bad I'll take your word for it. Smoking is an entirely different thing here. Last Christmas my dad built a teepee out of cardboard in the front yard and hung sausages from I think a clothesline and smoked his meats in there. We're silly like that
>>22185691So the distinction is often cold vs hot smoking and fat content. Poultry is always bad reheated after cooking because it dries out more. The whole point of the huge brine is to keep it from being dry. Sausages or large things like ham have enough fat that reheating it is fine and the smoking isn't the cooking it's more curing. There is also cold smoking where you separate the fire from the smoke chamber enough to basically just cure the food with smoke rather than cook it which is what smoked salmon is. American bbq is hot smoked and it is cooked right then, this isn't for curing the meat or food preservation. it's just flavor from the smoke. You smoke at like 225F for this while cold smoking for curing you want to be 50-85F, this keeps the fat from rendering during the process. Like if I were to make bacon I woul ld rub on salr, pepper, ground celery seed, cute in the fridge for 10 days, cold smoke it, then good to go. I would assume you are cold smoking in this way.
>>22184532I prefer fish over any meat, but I'm scared of how polluted our waters are. Maybe I've just been too throughly propagandized. On pizza, NY pizza isn't the best style of pizza. Thin pizza is bullshit.
>>22185637You have my condolences about the pizza for what it's worth we were racist towards them for a few decades at least
>>22185760>Poultry is always bad reheated after cooking because it dries out moreWhen I picture a Thanksgiving dinner I always imagine a big jug of gravy on the table specifically because such a big bird is hard to cook properly without drying out at least some bits. Yea, what can I say, sorry about your waking up before dawn in the middle of winter, sounds like no advice of mine can help you out of that.>I would assume you are cold smoking in this way.It's what we do, yeah, only during winter for some reason I can't really explain people prefer to cure not in the fridge out in the cold. I guess they double as Christmas decoration.>>22185849You'll find it in some cheap places but it's not the same. They don't use the lowest quality meat product and the mushrooms are sometimes fresh. A travesty.>we were racist towards them for a few decades at leastThem who? Romanians? You ought to be
>>22184571The “ethnic” food in Europe mostly sucks THOUGHMostlyPost some REAL Tacos or REAL Bo Luc Lac that you’d get in EuropeYour Italian friend was most likely a tasteletMurican franchise pizza is garbage, yes, but “mid” is literally ebonics stolen from the Weed Community
>>22184572Lol post some “Authentic” Finnish Mexican food it’s probably hilarious
>>22185882i have a feeling you forgot to post keys
>>22185819Neapolitan is the Best Style have PizzaYou’re a tastelet
>>22185872The Italians, fortunately the Romanians have not yet figured out the art of stealing aircraft
>>22185895Give it time. Gypsies have stolen airplane tires off of Charles de Gaulle airport before, and if they couldn't get them off, they'd just slash them open for the fuck of it. I can't find a source for this but so the people say. Wouldn't shock anyone.
>>22185882What I find risible is that this manlet cuckold hasn't got a passport and never has. He's also becoming increasingly effeminate.
>>22183891What sort of faggy semitic list is this? Where's the pig?
>>22183891Country ham. It simply does not exist in Europe. Jamon Iberico and prosciutto are inadequate substitutes for it. The only way a European can acquire country ham is if they own a pig farm and cure their own hams.
>>22186526>Country ham. It simply does not exist in EuropeSpeck is the closest equivalent, differing only in the seasoning and wood used for smoking. The process is otherwise identical.
>>22186142Jews aren't allowed to eat cheeseburgers, cheesesteak, or lobster rolls.
>>22186551Good
>>22186539>The process is otherwise identicalNo it isn't. Country ham is often cured for longer periods of time than speck is. Also, speck is deboned and divided into smaller pieces before curing, whereas country hams are cured whole with the bone in. Speck is typically served uncooked, while country ham is always cooked before it is eaten.
>>22184071Anywhere in Europe I can walk down the block and get a philly cheesesteak? damn that's crazy. the things I'm learning today
>>22184898everything in that picture looks like it came out of a plastic bag
>>22186721You're a gullible rube. I know you're being childish and sarcastic this time, but that's how you usually 'learn' about the outside world. You hear one thing an, having no analytical skills, take it as gospel.
>>22183891Glowie thread.
>>22183957>Forncus Sweet Tea?
>>22183891That should be Detroit pizza.
>>22186933its famous you knob
>>22186935more like... denigga pizza
>>22187125Can you explain more please?
>>22183891there is no such thing as an Oklahoma steak
>>22183891Sup milo
>>22184355Whole head? No. Cheeks? Yes. That's what barbacoa is from. This is less of a typical barbecue joint item and more Mexican. Tongue occasionally gets used for tacos but is definitely not a texmex thing.Both can be found at HEB but are located with the other unusual items like chicken hearts/livers/feet.
>>22183939Would you like my bacon recipe? That way, when we do deport you, you can have something to remember us by, like Proust's madeleine.
>>22184532>why don't Americans eat much fish?Freezer burn
>>22187649>TongueAka lengua.Tastes like the very best roast you've ever had but the mouth feel is a bit too soft, almost slimy to me, which I find off-putting enough to skip it when I run across it.
>>22184424>>22183939And we wouldn't miss anything about you, ever think about that?
>>22188078>ever think about that?No because it's patently false. Time for my morning run. Peace, homie.
>>22183891All but sushi and pizza gt my thumbs up.Nothing wrong with sushi but I don't want a mountain of rice with micrometer slices of raw fish.
>>22183891I went to america once, and I think the only thing that I liked over non american stuff was dr pepper. And all my friends made fun of me for that
I eat more cheesesteaks than I'm proud of.
>>22188439e-hee-hee-heee
lobster roll, easy
Corn dogs.
Oh look it's this thread again.
