If you cut pizza like this I'm never eating at your house.
I use a pizza bat'leth, is that okay?
>>22185118i cut it with my mouth. pizza's at 7. see you at my pLace.
>>22185118you are not supposed to cut pizza like some retard, you eat them with a fork and a knife
>>22185126it's a real thingwtf I need one
>not driving a pizza scooter
>>22185188God damn anon
>>22185166What is the knife for?
>>22185268Cutting like a non-retard.
>>22185322If it's tender enough you should be able to cut it with the edge of the fork.
>>22185118>How'd you get in my trailer?
Good. Keep off my bridge pylon.
>>22185188I think I saw you post this in some other thread last week and I’m still considering buying one
>>22185126
>>22185118I used to use a sword.
>>22185358That wasn't me.
>>22185118Never darken my towels again.
>>22185118I don't cut pizza like that. You're invited for pizza. The entire yard is filled with hidden bear traps and every window and entrance has a 12 gauge pipegun rigged on a tripwire. If you try to approach the house in any manner besides very carefully you're going to die.
>>22185118I don't recall inviting you to eat at my house
>>22185556Fine, it's not like I wanted to come over anyway. Enjoy your cold pizza alone.
>>22185556I'm Davis. I WILL come to you.
>>22185556Don't. You're pre-rejected.
>>22185166I'll try one of these when I can get one for $5 or less until then tongue my anus Mario.
>>22185188Based
Make it so.
>>22185118>againw-what?
>>22185774>Cheese pizza IS my favorite! How did you know anon?
>>22185807
>>22185118You have provided rage bait, an insult to a very normal practice, and zero alternatives to the topic at hand.Shit thread.
>>22185941i agree, but at least we got to see this cute little thing >>22185188i prefer using a proper kniffeliff, pizza cutters are usually annoying to clean
>>22185941Well thanks for the bump.
>>22185807So he's normal?Because who doesn't?
>>22185941>zero alternativesI literally pictured >>22185689 as soon as I read the op because that's what I've seen used in pizzerias.
>>22186054Didn't realize that Davis frequents pizzerias.
>>22185118what's wrong with the wop wheel?
You may not like it, but this is what peak performance looks like.
if you drink your milk like this, you are my sworn enemy and I curse you and your whole bloodline to centuries of suffering and despair
>>22185118finally, a good thread. anybody worth a shit knows the gourmet and authentic way to eat a pizza is uncut and just grab it with both hands and slobber all over it. really get your tongue over all that cheese, and then bite gently when your ready for the climax of actually eating the pizza like a civilized man
>>22186054Sorry anon, I was not talking about you. I appreciate you posting alternatives. I was talking about OP. OP could have posted that or any other pizza cutting device but instead chose not to do so, creating a shitty thread. Not saying the others in the thread might make it less shitty, but that the beginning of this thread is in the top shitty ways to begin a thread. (the others being vagueposting, frogposting, and "lust provoking image irrelevant question")
>>22186224How else would I drink it? Directly from the bag?
>>22186396Yeah, the milkbags.
>>22186393I'm not saying I posted the picture. I'm saying I mentally pictured that kind of pizza cutter and was able to infer that was the alternative cutting method op was getting at.
>>22186393Posting pizza is lust provoking.
amateur hour is over
>>22186224I cannae imagine drinking milk any way other than right in front of an open fridge 1L at a time
>>22187105You're not a maverick or a hardman, you're not special
>>22185774>>22185689>perhaps today is a good day to... dine
Good. Now make the pointy end sag so the toppings slide off.
>>22187105I hope when the muslims take over they make it illegal to talk like that.
>>22187173
>>22187355>you... are not prepared for this pizza
>>22187355fucking hell its a real product
>>22187355>>22187371That's cool, I'd like one, but it's the wrong way around.
>>22186553what does your wife's taste like?hope you're not just blowing hot air, anon
>>22185689>>22186820>>22187355>>22187371These are never marketed with pictures of cutting salami. I'm no salami man myself but I know that cutting in a straight line through a salami doesn't work. Maybe it works on ultra thin slices but then they fold and curl and stick to the blade. That's why rollers are superior, because you can cut zig zag and leave the delicious salami in tact.
>>22187391Salty coins.
>>22185268It's for stabbing people who try to take your pizza.
>>22187839Look out Noid...
>>22187839Oh so it's more of a Hobo KnifeYeah that makes sense to me
>>22186224i warm mine on the stove before drinkingdrinking cold milk is a sin.it is known.
>>22187498>I'm no salami man myselfI think you’re being modest
>>22185525booby trapping is mega illegal btw I'm sure you're joking but the fact that you posted this means the thought has crossed your mind. if you ever injured someone, even a trespasser, with a booby trap they would nail you to the wall. imagine if a child wandered off and stepped on a bear trap or a .12 gauge landmine.
>>22185118>lots of though with microscopically thin slices of whatnotWe be grilling here, boy!Been grilling and stuffing my face for 7 days I though I was gonna pass out.
>>22187879How do you stop the skin from forming?
>>22188402It's good for lifting up a cheap cut but good meat doesn't need it. It's a straight up crime on a nice steak.
>>22188402Use a cartouche.
>>22186224
>>22187839Ah, the Yuropean way.Stab it with the fork, pull it up and eat it from the crust while moving the knife around in the air yelling "Don't come any closer to my pizza!"That's how we do it.
>>22188421in the US they use guns or reality TV for thatit's true because i've read it in a "book"
>>22188212lol
>>22188405Are you talking about milk or steak?
>>22188421UK hasn't been Europe for years now,cut this crap meme
>>22185118a cleaver works for me, I hate having a drawer full on single-purpose tools
>>22188725>he doesn't have a dedicated pizza cutter drawer for at least 19 different typesNgmi
>>22188515You're so fucking boring
What pizza should I order for tonight?
>>22189173pepperoni and cream cheese
>>22189173pineapple and spiders
>>22189173White pizza with extra extra garlic, olive oil base, and no less than 2 kinds of cheese, cooked well done.
>>22191546I don't know what your kike codewords mean
>>22185166you are a retard, you have ro roll it up and eat it like a wrap, you uncultured swine
if you breath air through your mouth and nose i cures your entire blood line to be bald
>>22186820You have to stack at least 5 pizzas and than smash with a sledgehammer on the device
>>22188212your soooo fucking gay
>>22185118What about like this?
>>22188515Oh did i miss something, has it finaly sunk?
>>22191574Im not shure,everithing in me says no. so it has to be controversial art
>>22191574when I make my own pizza I slice it like this. I just get a knife and cut off random chunks.
>>22185188It's cute but it just doubles the surface you need to clean for no real benefit.
>>22185166if you went out of your house for once and did this in public people would laugh at you loudly"look at that fat weirdo, ahahaha who eats pizza like that"thats your destiny
>>22191614>for no real benefitscooter funy
>>22191622everyone I have ever seen in a pizza place uses a knife and fork.
>>22186221He’s right, you know.
>>22186221>no gloves
>>22191622try visiting a restaurant that's not a fast food joint - they dont always cut them up before servingso if you try eating it like a frisbee, people will talk about you behind your backyou need to travel outside your neighbourhood
>>22191755I have literally never encountered this in my life. Even at the most posh Italian restaurants, pizza is always sliced
A Very Sophisticated Way to Eat Pizza
>>22187371>>22187355So it's a gimmicky mezza luna?
When eating pizza, be sure to use a knife and fork to cut off the excess crust before eating.
>>22191856A guy in my class used to cut his pizza with regular scissors, and then he put them straight in his pocket so he had some when we were out playing. Still makes me laugh like 30 years later.
>>22185118Haha that's nothing. People who use scissors are the ultimate faggots.
>>22192142They're called shears, discsperg
I use my Chinese cleaver. Great for both cutting and transporting the slice.
>>22185941>You have provided rage bait, an insult to a very normal practice, and zero alternatives to the topic at hand.>104 repliesOn the contrary I think that's the sign a very successful thread
>>22191888using a sword for cutlery is one thing, but Frostmourne is above and beyond>>22192142pic relatido is what i think of when as shears, but i guess a pair of scissors are called shears if they're designed/made with a specific purpose in mind..?is there some sort of rigid definition to this?
>>22193175>My face when I have no face
>>22193175førgot the image>>22193196køk
>>22187355It really bothers me that everything is backwards on that Bat'leth. I understand why. But because of that alone I could never buy It.
>>22192294Insisting on having your pizza-cutting tool being called shears and not just scissors is way spergier.
>>22191753Mask up!
>>22187371Felony to own that in England
>>22185118>I'm never eating at your houseso what's the bad news?
Check this out, guys.
>>22185149Should I bring 1 or 2kg of imitation crab meat this time anon?
>>22186221>>22191747
>>22188198Chuckled sensibly.
My pizza cutter brokeAfter I wash it, I like to whip it through the air to get the water off but this time the blade separated from the handle and launched across the kitchen
>>22195570If you had any friend, family, or loved ones, it might have hit them in the back.That would have been epic.
>>22195570I enjoyed the thought of your story for like 5 seconds until it hit me that the blade probably didnt stick into anything but simply wobbled through the air without any elegance to simply plink on some dirty floortile with that shit and unsatisfying sound every flimsy piece of sheet metal does.
>>22195462Explain, what is this actually meant to do
>>22186820I dont get why these aren't more common in restaurants, they cut the pie perfectly everytime and instantly
>>22195581You dont use both at once. You pick the wheel you deem fit at that moment. Its ment to be really fucking annoying to clean and ideally, its assembled to store small amounts of water in cravices that only drip off when you put the thing back into the drawer and only then.
>>22195581Perforate then cut. Seems like a good idea too me, I often have to go over the same slices I already cut to get them fully detached from each other.
>>22195583You'd have to be careful about cleaning them each time to prevent cross contamination for allergies and it looks annoying to clean for something you'd use on every pizza.
>>22195581I worked at Dominos for a bit, they roll the notched one over the Garlic and Cinni Dippers® to make little holes for better absorbtion of the grease.
you idiots just fold the pizza once don't bother using cutlery
>>22185126You dishonor your house if the food is not moving. Enjoy your burnt bird meat, man without honor.
>>22193211It's made by TOS Klingons. They're kind of weird.
>>22185118Okay then Ill bust the scissors ?
>>22195462Wtf is that
>>22191946>Not eating the crustI hate you.
