Agent Cooper edition This thread is for demystifying the lynchian substance called "coffee". If you're new and confused, start here: https://pastebin.com/UEzwuyLz if you're old and confused, that dark roast you like is going to come back in style. previous: >>22209948
I might drink coffee because of Cooper. I first watch Twin Peaks when I was like 10 and way to young to understand any of it. Rewatched the originals before the third season came out and I had a vivid flashback of the 10 year old me making a conscious decision that I would drink strong black coffee when I got older.
>>22224972he is a man who can appreciate a cup of black coffee from a diner or a hotel and i respect that. he doesn't need more.
playful little cà phê sữa đá
>>22224941What's your choice here?
Sippin on that wush wush.>>22225033Any cafe with that many espresso drinks makes shit espresso.
>>22225045Why is that?
>>22225033i have never had an actual frappé that wasnt a 'bucks frappuccino so i would try that.
Wow! It was that easy?
>>22224941>Wait a minute. Wait a minute.>*sip*>You know, this is—excuse me—a DAMN fine cup of coffee.Thread theme: https://youtu.be/0P3TWaDHe3ANothing like a great cup of black coffee.
>>22225033Espresso or Americano but if it has to be some cream/sugar involvement i like whatever the hell Vietnamese coffee is.I don't like booze in coffee.
>>22225045>>22225050I said, motherfucker, why is that?
>>22225149The filtered water thing is important. Even if you're like me, drinking whatever grocery store ground was on sale brewed in a dripper, running the water through a brita first makes a difference.
>>22225206based
>>22224972i remember seeing my elementary school teacher drinking starbucks every morning, and i decided that i wanted to become an adult that would go to starbucks before work.
>>22225261Did you?I am fairly certain the decision stayed with me in some corner of my brain, shortly after I turned 18 I bought a moka pot and started drinking coffee. For the first year or so I kept it a secret from everyone for some reason, only made coffee when everyone was asleep or out of the house and kept my moka pot hidden. I picked the moka pot simply because it was the most discrete option and could be easily concealed, I could prep it in my room and all I would have to do in the kitchen was set it on the stove and bring the whole thing back up to my room. I miss that year of my life, the coffee will never be as good as it was then.
>>22225287>Did you?no, i told my mom about it and she said starbucks is demonic and has a prostitute as the logo. i turned into a neet, so the closest i got to that dream was making sweet milk coffee before school
>>22224941coffee time?yes indeed
>>22225287>For the first year or so I kept it a secret from everyone for some reason,W-why? Nobody else in your family drank coffee?
>>22224941Do people actually feel a boost of energy after drinking coffee? I don't drink coffee often but when i do i don't feel any difference
>>22225421that depends. do you consider adrenaline spikes, hyperventilation, and dread of impending doom to be "energy"?
>>22225431Maybe
>>22225431based dehydrated anon
I've tried using a larger grain size with my V60 paper filter so I can brew 2 cups of coffee at a time instead of just 1. I'm not sure it's going to work, but I can't justify needing to use 1 paper filter for 1 cup of coffee. "A penny saved" and all that.
>>22225539>I've tried using a larger grain size with my V60 paper filter so I can brew 2 cups of coffee at a time instead of just 1explain your reasoning for why you think grinding coarser has any effect on the size of your cup
>>22225546Coarser grinds = faster infiltration = same flavor you DUMMYIf I use the same size grinds that I use for 1 cup of coffee to make 2 cups, then the water will sit longer in the grinds. This will cause the 2 cups of coffee to taste more bitter and ruin the 2 cups produced.
>>22225551
>>22225555EPIC double quads co/ck/gobbler
>>22225551something about this sounds incorrect but you say it so confidently that it must be true.
>>22225551>If I use the same size grinds that I use for 1 cup of coffee to make 2 cups, thenLarger faster bloom dump. If you want to be lazy.
>>22224678for science
>>22225214I would guess the idea is that a cafe that trains their baristas to make such a wide variety of beverages probably doesn't focus too much on ensuring the actual coffee is good, considering the customer probably won't be tasting it much, anyway.
>>22225760
>>22225760based science experiment
>>22225033none of these drinks are right
>>22225299shes right
>>22225033do they have coffee?
>>22225853no
>>22225355If it was that simple don't you think I would have given the reason instead of "for some reason?">>22225760The acidity in the coffee might result in cream cheese full of coffee grounds.
how young were u allowed to drink coffee from?
>>22226010i was allowed to try it when i was a kid but i didnt start really drinking it til i was like 16
>>22226013it was off limits for me but tea wasn't so i didn't start drinking coffee till like 19
The Brikka has defied all my expectations and not necessarily in a good way. I thought I could use it much like a moka, but no it just works totally differently.It should be considered its own brewer, not just a moka variant.Anyway after a month I'm sorta getting the hang of it now. Had to switch to a light roast so it wouldn't burn the coffee.
>>22225787Other than learning the ratios there's no more "training" required to make any of those than a latte.
>>22226010i don't remember ever being prohibited from it. i remember one time drinking like 5 servings of instant coffee when i was 11. caffeine never worked as well after that
"Honeybee latte" from a bougie coffee shop near me.
>>22226032what's in it
>>22226034honey and espresso and whole milk and whatever that herb is
>>22226031retard legend
>>22226035So it's a london fog but coffee. That's nice, I do that sometimes.rosemary probably
>>22226035Rosemary.
>>22226039>>22226038it's obviously lavender, plebs
>>22225149>use cold water https://youtu.be/VrICQ_cl8dc
>>22226030>latte>2 cups milk>1 cup espressoCool cool how about a cortado, the connoisseurs milk drink>two kinds of syrupsCool cool. Sounds like your kind of cafe.
>>222260107
>>22225760the milk won't go through a coffee filter, small yeild, makes a huge mess, and worst of all .... it tastes like absolute ass. worst thing my tongue has ever laid taste upon.DO NOT DO THIS.
>>22226280on the flip side I added a little monk fruit syrup and it actually tastes quite heavenly now. i think this could be a very valid method of brewing if you have the right filters for it
>>22226288you would probably have better luck just making coffee syrup and mixing it with milk
>>22226289it tastes similar to cold brew concentrate mixed into milk
>>22226032>bougie coffee shopis it the kind where the baristas wear butler uniforms?
>>22225760>leaving milk uncovered in the fridge for 12 hoursfucking retard
>>22226409its just milk bro
>>22226409How dirty is your fridge?
>>22226409>t. moldy old fridge full of green dust
>>22226435
>>22226412>>22226423>>22226435air is airyour fridge has air in it.milk + air = bad taste.you could leave it uncovered in a clean room for 12 hours and it would still taste bad.
>>22226280try again with cheese cloth
>>22226442life must be very hard for people who have whatever you have.
>>22226480prove me wrongoxidized milk tastes gross
>>22226412You’re fucking stupid. Fridge has smells and stuff. >>22226423Cope. Your fridge isn’t clean.
>>22226510>Fridge has smells and stuff.yeah, if it's filthy and smelly like yours.
>>22226442>>22226508theres air in your milk carton.
there's air in my coffee
coffees to pair with getting ripped off at the mechanic?
>>22226552starbucks caramel mocha frappochini venti maciato pumpkin spice latte cause you're a fruit cake if you go to the mechanic
>>22226529retard
>>22225033>red eye>one cup espresso>one cup hot coffee>chai teaNot coffee>Irish Coffee>No cream head-floating ontopThis image is retardedCoffee made of coffee + coffee?
>>22226778>Coffee made of coffee + coffeeit's called a red eye and it's made of drip coffee + espresso coffee. hope this helps.
Enjoying how easy it is to pour over a clever dripper. Still haven't got a better taste than with a v60 though.
>>22226569we can't all be white trash knuckledraggers, I'm sorry to say.
>>22226879>Still haven't got a better taste than with a v60 though.i wouldnt expect it to bethe ease of use is why you use it. not because it makes the best coffee.
>>22224941Does it really matter if I grind my coffee beans in an electric bladed grinder or a hand-cranked mill if I didn't roast them myself?
>>22226934redditors will tell you that you aren't allowed to brew coffee from freshly roasted beans
>>22226934yes and it has nothing to do with reddit obsession
>>22226934it doesn't matter for immersion brewing, only matters for percolation brewing
>>22226946
>>22225760>>22226280>milk solids vs. water content>adjust bean ratio to latter>do 16 hours minimum as if it were cold brew>probably needs higher ratio to overcome the aforementioned
>>22226934lazy bump
not lazyjust efficient
can roast anon do a science experiment where he adds a little baking soda after brewing freshly roasted beans to see if it tastes like degassed beans?
>>22227013I'm certainly not going to do that but the skillet retard can.
>>22227013why would that do that>>22227020shhh... don't wake him up.
>>22224941What are your feelings on airplane coffee?
>>22227039>why would that do thatremoves dissolved co2
>>22227040sounds like a good way to have a stroke
>>22227049but my water already has baking soda dissolved in it
>>22227058your water would taste bad if it had enough baking soda to remove enough co2 from the coffee
>>22227061so you're saying the coffee would taste bad if it had enough baking soda to remove the co2
>>22227078there would be no more baking soda left in your water if you managed to add just enough to reach perfect stoichiometry
>>22227040the pipes ain't ever clean, chief.
>>22227013now this is a good bumpbelievably retarded
>>22225216Even just letting the water sit uncovered for a while would make a difference. It's primarily the chlorine in treated water that tastes like shit.
am i retarded if i only drink my coffee out of one of those green mugs?
>>22227120not if you're referring to a fire king oven ware D handle jadeite mug
>>22227122no just like a standard chinese hunters green coffee mug lelthat looks like the reasonable upgrade tho
the goat...
>>22227126nothin wrong with a good sturdy mug of a single color
>>22227124just watch out for cadmium
>>22227138the lead paint in my teacup counteracts this?
>>22227128it blends in like a prop I love it
i use a santa mug
>>22227155based
>>22227155Grow up
>>22227223
>>22227040I got diarrhea once for drinking this shit
for me, its a clear glass mug with a floral pattern embossed on it
>>22225045>wushDid you get it from Elixr?I thought it was ok, nothing too crazy, very subtle
>>22227590Homeroast. I bought 20lbs of greens last year and I'm on the last like 200g. 96hour anaerobic wush is anything but subtle.https://thecaptainscoffee.com/products/ethiopia-yirgacheffe-wush-wush-96-hour-anaerobic-natural?variant=41912356307033
>>22227596>anaerobichow do you know it isnt artificially flavored?
>>22227600Fermented top notes, not perfume.
>>22227596I got a bag of washed wush wush so that might be why it's so subtle>anaerobicwhich notes did you get?>>22227600cofermentations are very obvious since the notes you get at the start don't change at all even after the coffee cools down
>>22227612I dunno man, its like sangria? Jungle juice? Layers of fruit and wine with a crisp finish. Swapped from kalitas(slow) and sibarist(fast) to xbloom filters and now I'm getting some crazy herbals on the back end as it cools. >400rpm Wug Sweet>1:22 on a no bypass Sworks dripper(.3mm hex screen)>20 sec of immersed bloom, wet wdt, melodrip,>Glacial water buffered to taste
>>22227619>Jungle juicethat's not a thing
>>22227623
>>22227596what is your roasting method
>>22227663120v ac heater120v dc fan(no fucking idea why he picked that, I should be looking for a 16v rc car motor to swap in)https://artisanaltechnologies.co.uk/
At home I like to pull 100-120 ml (from a double shot portafilter) for my americanos. If I wanted to order that at a cafe, what's the correct phrasing?
>>22227763"Do you do lungos here? I'd like a double-shot lungo, please."
>>22227808Thanks, but hmm.. I still like to add hot water.
>>22227825A double-shot lungo works out to 100-120ml. You can still add your usual hot water.
>>22224941Here's a question: does anyone ever change up their type of coffee to pair better with whatever they're eating, or is pairing not really done with different types of coffee?
use case?
Of course, there's still the chance that the barista will misinterpret/fuck up your order and give you something completely different.
>>22227678how long might it take to get to first crack in something like this, with this kind of bean?
>>22227832Yes, I do this.
>>22227842Describe some of your preferred pairings.
>>22227838~4minutes on ~half power.>>22227836Fuck off faggot.
>>22227832if I'm eating something spicy i need to have very hot black coffee because it enhances the perception of spiciness and pain in the mouth. in a good way.
>>22227836Fuck on, pussy slayer.
>>22227829What if I say "12 oz Americano, long shots"? Would that make sense?>>22227836This is why I generally try to just order basic shit... Otherwise, things get fucked up and I'm too much of a pussy to complain.
>>22227868>Would that make sense?It would confuse them more than saying lungo.
>>22227871fuck... I'll just stick to basic americanos then
>>22227847>~4minutes on ~half poweruh oh. i suspected i have been roasting too high and i think i probably was. i think i was getting first crack around 3, maybe even less sometimes.
>>22227881I used to roast UL like that because I heard thats how Moodtrap did it. Just raging the heat for as short of a time as possible. He was also renting time at a roastery so maximizing output was probably the actual goal.
>>22227877It doesn't hurt to ask, Anon. Maybe you can educate them on different espresso drinks? :)
>>22227832I usually don't drink cofee during my meals, I do it at a time of its own
>>22227892That makes me too nervous. It's fine. I can just make my stronger Americanos at home.
instant americano with cheese pastry this evening
>>22227985>cheese pastryyummers
>>22227988yeahit lush
Thoughts on prosumer espresso machine?
>>22227832sure i pairmy dick to your mouth
>>22228043i dont know what that means
>>22228043They don't make you a pro consumer.
>>22227833>decafi think people treat that like a chamomile tea before bed
>>22228204>i want to go to bed soon but i also want to taste coffeebasically
>>22228207i am so JUSTed right now... drink coffee all night and wake up at 4pm
>>22228209thats the life
>>22228108I just found out about them a few days ago. Google it, it is between kitchen espresso machines and commercial. Prosumer. If someone has one one, I would like to know. I want one. It seems worthy. Otherwise, I get the gaggia one day. >>22228112I am not here for jokes.
>>22228263do you mean this
>>22228353or this
>>22228353This. I like the semi-proness of it. >>22228355I think this is just home and amateur.
>>22228388>Thisokthen i would say my thoughts on it are that they are good
