Life is a curse

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>>77317445
A white russian for me, boss.

Any other anons that have accepted their hermit status? I've kind of become more cheerful and easygoing, learning guitar, drumming at the gym with my hands, playing videogames on my PS1 and other old consoles. Just enjoying my solitude.
Close school friends finally forgot my birthday, girls keep being selfish.
I think my time of living as a wizard in a tower has come as I become more accepting of peace.

>>77317635
Yeah i accepted my single life a while ago and honestly it is based. I just spend my weekends going on walks and do things i enjoy.

>>77317445
Awful, people are rude assholes and bullies. I wish I was a neet.

>>77317684
What happened anon?

>>77317445
Coffee, and then water please. Quite a bit of water and some Tylenol to help with the headache from the cialis I'm about to take.

Kids both have something that gets them out of the house this afternoon, so high chance of getting laid. This is where my life is, excited for a chance to actually have sex with my own wife. Getting upset about it doesn't do me any good, but, well, shit.

Saturday was good. A little gardening, a few hours wrenching on my project car, went to a little party in the afternoon and only had one drink. Resisted the urge to get out of bed at 11:00pm and hammer down a whole box of cheerios. Today should be pretty good too, and it looks like I'll finish the weekend without having destroyed my weekday progress on my cut for once.

>>77317445
2 days in on quitting nicotine. I have been addicted for 13 years, most of that time I have been using snus. I feel like I am going absolutely insane right now but I am so sick of this addiction

If any of you ever consider using nicotine, dont. Its by far the hardest addiction I have ever ended

>>77317779
im very glad i never went all in on it like some of my friends. Ill have a cigar every so often, maybe once every two months at most, and thats about it. makes it easier to control when its not regular

however my sugar addiction is painful. i really have to control how much soda i take in, im down to one can of diet a day now

>>77317779
>>77317837
>be me
>chad height and frame
>never took up the ciggy-wiggies
>lifelong struggle with the jelly rolls
>little brother has same build
>he's a smoker
>lean and buff his entire life

I am a friendless kissless virgin who barely leaves his room for nearly a decade straight. I just work (at home), lift (at home), post here and sleep (of course, also always at home).
Yesterday when I went to get groceries I ran into an old high school friend who was very happy to see me, invited me to BBQ and a certain house party today to come with him and catch up on everything. On the spot almost instinctively I made up some bullshit that I can't go because I have to go to xyz place, "another time then" and then we split ways.

And here I am still in my room solving Captchas and posting on 4chan.org instead of going to a friendly barbecue and meeting other people on a beautiful sunny Sunday. I deserve to die alone

>>77317779
>hardest addiction
Fuck yeah it is. For me it was harder than low dose opiates and weed. I was still thinking about nicotine daily 2 months later.

I’m doing good in one area and bad in a sort of opposite adjacent area that doesn’t matter so long as I continue doing well in the other
>good
Found out I can get the certs I need without school. I want to go into a trade. No one will hire unless you have school, certs, or 5 years of experience including entry level. Which I get, they don’t feel like training a greenie up. Fine whatever. I’m hoping I can get the certs and they’ll consider that good enough to give me a chance. I only need a few weeks to start learning shit and to be able to prove I can do that crap when given the opportunity to practice it. So hopefully that happens soon. Probably going to spend this month studying and attempt the test by July.
Also side note I’m an uncle now. I held my nephew and fed him. He’s adorable. I don’t think there’s ever been a happier or prouder moment in my life. I want to be a better person for him.
>bad
People keep fucking with me. Idk what it is. Idk what I could be doing wrong and I’m certainly open to the idea I could be doing something I’m unaware of, by which I mean I’m not saying “oh boo hoo woe is me there’s no way I could be the LCD or the problem” But ultimately I don’t bother anyone. I mind my business. I show up to my job I socialize I laugh I discuss weekend plans and play that whole game and joke when appropriate I work hard and I do my job well. I’ll go do my errands and just grab what I know I need. I may go for a walk in my neighborhood. You know normal shit. It’s not even like Im some quiet shut in. Inevitably there’s some faggot who has to cross lines and shit talk me. Say shit under his breath drive by insults, spread lies to other people. I would say 99% of people o get along great with but that 1% is always lingering around. I’m tired of it. It’s almost always some nigger who’s obese or pathetically scrawny with those dead soulless NPC eyes. The types who if I treated even slightly the same would lose it

>>77317445
I worked 14h wedding filming last night and 5h filming today and im exhausted. Also didn't get a lot of mires at the wedding which is extra sad

>>77317876
Go then

>>77317880
You sound like a schizo

>>77317880
didn't read

>>77317885
No clue where his house is located and obviously I don't have social media so no direct contact either

>>77317880
Example of being fucked with:
At my job there were two guys who just kept shit talking me. One is some white Hispanic who thinks he’s an MMA fighter after like a month of classes years ago, he would try to stare me down and all this crap but would always look away if I looked at him. He actually started wearing lifts to make himself taller than me legit came in one week with his heels almost out of his shoes and like 4 inches taller than the previous week. I accidentally embarrassed him because I scratched my beard and he started doing the same and I began laughing realizing he was watching me out of his peripheral.


The other guy is a 5’8” black around 20 years old. He tries so hard to have stare downs with me. Wannabe gangster type with a rolled up shiesty on his head empty jansport backpack while on the clock. Last week he tried to stare me down and I caught his eyes and just looked at him and nodded in that “what’s up bro” way and he got uncomfortable and looked away got bent out of shape like he wanted me to look away first and kept doing drive by muttering under his breath insults at me for the rest of the day.


This is genuinely so retarded that grown adults act this way.

>>77317880
If youre going trades get used to the passive aggressiveness man. I know what you’re trying to describe and I know how annoying it is. These are insecure people who have pegged you as a somehow semi successful autist that has made it to their same level. They don’t even know what they’re doing not consciously for whatever its worth. Most people cant be fucked to even notice people like this because it really does not matter and youre fuckin up by placing so much importance on, in your own words, NPCs. Keep doing you have fun with the people you get along with get those certs and go walk into some businesses asking to speak to whoever handles hiring with physical copies of your resume. You’ll have an apprentice position within a few weeks and then get to deal with the same kind of screw ups in a different field. But you will probably be happier about it

>>77317907
Ever since i developed my social skills people stopped fucking with me.

>>77317876
This is probably a copypasta because I feel like I’ve seen it before. But I know the exact feeling. Being a completely alone kissless friendless virgin, and miserable because of it, but then being too self conscious to actually try to participate in social activities so you remain alone. In my case I have never had a person invite me somewhere to catch up or anything, but moreso not even putting myself in situations to try to meet people, then being miserable about how lonely I am. I hope I die soon

>>77317907
You're an autist. Many neurotypicals smell your neurodivergence and hate you for that. They cannot help it, it's an animal instinc, kind of like the women married to average men who just HAVE to spread legs to Chad.
These people operate solely on lower cogntive functions, such as the lymbic system. It's not that they're dumb (well, some are), it's just that all the intelligence they possess serves one purpose and one purpose only: to satisfy their basic impulses... be it to fuck Chad while being a married woman, or hate an autistic guy, or anything else that their lymbic systems dictate they should be doing.

>>77317926
I already know this I’ve heard stories but I don’t think I’ll mind as much if I’m doing something I actually wanna do and make more money. You’re right though I’m too concerned with what can even be called a bump in the road for me. I gotta get out of this job
>>77317928
I’m a lot better than I was even just a year ago, near 180 of how I was like 4 years ago. I guess I have more work to do though. It IS weird for someone to be so upset towards some random autistic dude for no apparent reason though

>>77317945
So it isn’t even that I’m doing something wrong they can just tell “this guy is a little different” and it’s like “I don’t understand it and that infuriates me” or is it more like “he’s probably an easy target for me to take my bitchiness out on”? It doesn’t make a world of difference. This is so ironic actually what they’re doing is actually such an autistic thing to do normal people would either not care or would just avoid the autist

>>77317953
>this guy is a little different
>I don’t understand it and that infuriates me
>my emotions don't lie so if I hate him it MUST be because he deserves to be hated
This is basically their thought process.

You shouldn't care about them but also don't make the mistake of underestimating them. They may be intelligent creatures that will use their intelligence to screw you up in clever ways, because they hate you and you "just deserve it", without ever considering using their intelligence to reflect upon why they hate you or if it even makes sense to feel that way about you. That's how they operate.

>>77317837
Funny you should mention it, diet soda is my new addiction while Im quitting nicotine. Currently on 5-6 cans a day, but I imagine this habit will be easier to kick

I saw a bbl in real life today. Looked absolutely silly. Like a giant water balloon. I tried not to react but once I got around the corner I couldn't stop laughing. Clown ass.

>>77317876
I had something Iike this 20 years ago. Initially said no, then went back and said sure, why the fuck not.

Changed my entire life for the better. Ended up with a nymphonaniac butterface girlfriend that tolerated my sperginess and essentially gave me a chance to experience everything I had missed out on to that point. By the time I broke up with her I'd caught all the way up to where I should have been.

Not saying the BBQ will automatically get you a desperate, horny girlfriend, but that one little yes could change your whole trajectory. If it's too late to change your mind on this one, just be ready for the next one.

>>77317445
I'm a 35yo friendless virgin who's never had a gf, but last week a girl in my apartment building left her phone number written down underneath my windshield wiper and i've been texting her. she seems to really like me and she's kinda cute, but i found out she moved her to "get sober' and i'm not sure what to think of that. on one hand, i'm kinda lonely and getting old, and on the other, do i wanna risk that? can i save her? she's been here for a few years and said she's been doing good. i don't know what the addiction was though.

>>77318052
Anon no. You’ll be happier to not risk it. I’ve seen dudes get into this position and they think “oh wow I just got lucky” and then 2 months later the bitch is a sloppy drunk living rent free in their home having dudes over while they’re at work and they can’t get her kicked out, when police are involved they side with the chick and now he can’t even live in his own home while she does god knows what and wrecks the place. Don’t be captain save a hoe

I literally can't comprehend what it's like to be normal. My friend (who I talk to once every few months) has fucked over 10+ girls since I've known him and I don't understand how. I see my normie coworkers constantly texting somebody on their phones and I wonder what it's like to have an actual friend group to talk to and do things with.

>>77318052
Go for it. It’s not like you have to marry her on the spot.
>>77317445
Club soda with lime. Weekend was great, worked out, napped, fucked, bbq‘ed and chilled. Life is good.

>>77318052
I was in a similar situation with a girl that had a questionable past. I took it too seriously and of course it didn't last. I should have just taken advantage of the opportunity to get laid and have fun until the inevitable.
So go into it with that mindset.

>>77318215
>My friend (who I talk to once every few months) has fucked over 10+ girls since I've known him and I don't understand how.
If you can't understand how something has happened there is a chance that it is because it's abnormal
How and why is someone fornicating so much
You are more normal compared to someone with a double-digit bodycount

>I wonder what it's like to have an actual friend group to talk to and do things with.
It feels like being the one that lags behind so that everyone can fit in a row while walking together on the sidewalk

been overthinking about someone I can't be with again, almost broke down in public like a bitch.

>>77317715
They wouldnt let him sit in the shopping cart today

>>77318254
Obsession is a cope for an unfulfilling life. Examine where your life is weakest, and make it your mission to fix every element of it. You dont need a woman, you need a project to work towards, an ideal life to cultivate.

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>32
>Good job - £60k a year
>Own my own home
>In the best shape of my life
>Should be happy but
>No friends
>No social life
>No gf
>Just spend every weekend alone in my house
>Feel no direction or ambition in life
Life without people in it really is just miserable. I find myself watching sicoms or RLM and just dreaming about having a close groups of buddies to do shit with.

>>77318291
Trying to give people socialization advice is hard because its actually a need for a deeper rewiring in people. The ability to want to go outside, meet people, laugh and talk with strangers, share your vitality with them and build connections, whilst not being knocked off centre by anyone anti-social you encounter should be a internal deep certainty within that person as something they genuinely want to do anyway.

Join 2-3 interest groups, sit with any anxiety and awkwardness as dragons to slay to eventually overcome, not with force, but detachment from outcomes, love the process of socialization and not the end result, and you will naturally begin building bonds. You just got to go where other people go and share some light with people.

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>>77317635
>Any other anons that have accepted their hermit status
Yes. I wish things were different but I've accepted how it is. I don't get depressed about it anymore, I'm pretty content.

>>77317445
my workout is going great, started october last year and have been consistently going at it since then with pauses due to seasonal sniffles. I was lucky enough to get some decent money with crypto and haven't been working for the past 2 years, focusing on myself but I'm bored now and want to get back into the working field. I used to do frontend engineering for corpos and have been playing around with AI assisted coding for the past week and it hit me; I will never be able to work in the field again like I used to. I'd more likely have to become a pseudo manager to wrangle a bot to do the thing I used to love as there's no reason to ship "hand crafted code" when a machine can do the same and the client doesn't care. that kinda put the sads on me today and I sinned and got 2 liters of beer, watched a sad movie and will go to bed early tonight not knowing wtf I'm supposed to do with my life now.

>>77318680
Get a manual labor job and become a man

>>77318291
I am in the same boat. 37 years old, no wife, no gf, no kids. I have a good job, with comfortable income. A healthy 401k. I get 6 weeks of vacation a year that I never use because I have nobody. I spend every weekend alone as time goes by. It didn't really eat at me until recently. I looked at my retirement building and thought about how life would be once I do retire. I got depressed because I am working toward the end goal of not working anymore, but work is all I have. If I was offered to retire today and never work again, I couldn't do it. I would waste away in my home. Work is the only normalcy I have in my life, and the only time I can socialize with people. I have reached out to coworkers in attempt to hangout or do things, but everyone always has an excuse. I have been going to my local gym for 3 years now and have never talked to anyone in there before. I have put it as a priority in my life to talk to someone in the gym, but it's so difficult. I feel like I need to corner someone to get their attention. Today, a beautiful girl got on the machine next to mine. I wanted to strike up a conversation but she had her headphones on and was buried in her phone between sets. I felt like a creep, but I just kept glancing to try and get her attention. She just wouldn't look at me. This all feels pathetic.

>>77318695
legit thought about that. I'm 38 years old, got a senpai with 2 kids. no employer in that field would get me an apprenticeship to start building a career. they're looking for people fresh out of school.
I'm kinda fucked and will probably have to go back to an office job or retail or some shit.

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>>77317445
Wife and daughter went to the gym with me both Saturday and sunday this weekend which was nice. I am getting ready to work on knocking out more of the /k/ innawoods challenges and went antique mall shopping today to find tools for bushcraft, found ome decent tools for really cheap and am excited to try them out

>28
>call center slave job
>55k a year
>gave up on gaming, lift and meal prep on my days off
>feel lonely most days, but it is pretty much my only problem atm

Coffee and sugar for me please, could be way worse I guess

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>>77318291
I'm the exact opposite of you almost.
>30
>shit job with whit pay
>rentoid
>only house I can hope to afford is 200k and that's pushing it
>no direction or ambition in life
>got a big friend group
The best advice I can give is to just push yourself out of your comfort zone. Speak to people at work more. Get a hobby and or try something you've always wanted to. Go to conventions and talk to random people. Try a trivia night at a bar. Join a run club or go hiking. Honestly having people around helps with the directionless feeling because the more you speak to people you realize almost everyone is. I don't have all the answers and I'm still as awkward as I ever was but I still push myself out of my comfort zone and do stuff I never thought I would just because. I'm modeling now just because I kept pushing myself. No real interest in it, just an excuse to leave the house. Even if you fail you just have to take your lumps and keep trying.

>>77318718
>6 weeks of vacation a year that I never use
Why not travel a bit? It’s not super fun alone, but its still worth it. See new places, meet different people, new experiences. For that alone it’s worth it, imho

>>77318929
I spent most of my 20's traveling the USA, so I have seen everything here. I would need to go abroad, and I don't care to do that alone. I have traveled alone to some places, but it's mostly a repeat of a place I have already been to and it feels like a waste.

>>77318291
>should be happy but
Why should you be happy? Because you think you have a good job and own a home? Having no social life, no relationship, and spending all your time in your house alone is guaranteed to make you unhappy. Oh no, you fell for the “dude if I have things I will be happy” meme

>>77318718
> didn't really eat at me until recently. I looked at my retirement building and thought about how life would be once I do retire. I got depressed because I am working toward the end goal of not working anymore, but work is all I have. If I was offered to retire today and never work again, I couldn't do it. I would waste away in my home. Work is the only normalcy I have in my life, and the only time I can socialize with people. I
Yeah why do you think so many men die quickly after retiring? When work in the only thing that gives you purpose, losing that purpose can slowly kill you. Your retirement that you’re looking forward to will consist of you sitting at home alone for the rest of your life or until you get too decrepit and have to go to a nursing home where no one will visit you and you will die alone and miserable. I don’t say it to be mean because a lot of us will have the same fate. I just hope I get the courage to kill myself soon

>>77318929
> Why not travel a bit? It’s not super fun alone, but its still worth it. See new places, meet different people, new experiences

This is such a meme and I’m surprised to even see it posted here. I figured 4chan was above the “dude solo traveling will change your life!” Normie bullshit.

Yeah dude, the people who have lived in the same country for nearly 40 years with people of similar ages, lifestyles, interests, language, customs, etc. yet have been unable to make friends or have relationships or marriage here will totally travel overseas into a foreign country where they don’t know anyone, don’t know the language, and have the added stress that travel brings with huge costs, transportation, hotels, restaurants, navigation, and having itineraries to follow with sights to see so that you don’t feel like you wasted your time and money going, and come out of their shell and suddenly be socializing with people and meeting women to have sex with a making friends from around the world. He definitely won’t be traveling alone thinking about how alone he is, seeing everyone else traveling with their friends and family, eating in restaurants alone with happy foreign people, etc. Totally bro. Solo traveling will be so awesome.

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>I value our friendship
Hello Darkness my old friend...

>>77318215
>>77318232
I have a friend like that and it’s because it IS abnormal. They’re almost exclusively fat trailer trash chicks. Dude has the healthiest delusional grip on reality I’ve ever seen, he’s shallow Hal’d himself with these nasty bitches. But I know he isn’t truly attracted to them because a chick like the type I typically get with started giving him attention for a while and he went all in until she ghosted him. I’m not hating, to each their own, I wish I could lower my standards but I literally can’t get it up if I’m not attracted to a woman. It could be that. A lot of guys do this.

>>77317445
I'm kinda confused.
I'm not desperate to lose a ton of weight fast or anything. But I've increased my activity by a substantial amount the past few weeks, and I've only been gaining weight despite not changing my diet at all.

My boss quit after 37 years last month. Bastard talked me into taking it over. Now I'm the meat market manager. They replaced him with me but didn't replace me with anyone, so I'm getting 60-70 hours a week. Don't have time to work out anymore, feeling worried bros.

>>77318910
Having a big friend group alone makes your life so much better than lonely losers like that guy and me. So what if you have a shit job and will only afford a small house at best. Why do you need extravagancy? Your social life makes your life more worthwhile than lonely wageslaves

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>>77318291
I'm in a similar boat

29 with a great paying job and tons of money invested yet I'm basically just living life on autopilot where its just work - gym then home. Two years ago I joined a BJJ gym where I actually started connecting with people but the training was too intense especially after a workout and I couldn't keep up with going 3-4x a week. Now I just cycle every Saturday morning and visit my parents on Sunday as my weekend. Also got scuba certified so at least I can dive anywhere in the world but that's only twice a year

There’s nothing like seeing how even the people living a similar social life less situation to yours are still infinitely better than you because at least they all have great jobs and have tons of money and they’re younger then you. At least they have the motivation to at least do that. I pray every night to get cancer or some other disease or freak accident

>>77319155
I only see them once or twice a year. I do appreciate them a lot because if I didn't have that support I know I would've killed myself already. That's why I recommend trying more stuff out of your comfort zone and trying to find that support. I'm not saying it's easy but it's possible. Especially if you have a decent paying job. It'll make affording hobbies and being able to try different things easier.

>>77318215
I know just what you mean. Must be a good feeling but I'll never know it

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>>77317445
Not too bad except had a depressed episode after consuming some psychedelics; however, today I'm feeling better, optimistic that I might acquire a job to at least give me more money to keep my new found alcoholic tendencies, and not to mention depending upon my budgeting skills, and as well as how much I could potentially earn. I might even be able to afford marijuana, THC, the devil's lettuce, and maybe make grandma, and ma proud that I at least can hold a job again. Fucking still pissed off that I lost a perfect fucking house, like everybody I was trying to provide for was given their own space, and while I'm still pissed off that I was the only one paying rent with a job, at least it gave me some experience running a household, and also wouldn't mind murdering a particular individual. I wouldn't mind marrying some ojou-sama achetype; however, at the same time I doubt that I could provide financially, mentally, and physically is a big possibility, but either way I think my family is fucking retarded sometimes, like I understand not being with the times since I also have a hard time keeping up, but like how in the fuck do you dumb ass hoes gamble the rent money where I have to personally bail you out from my savings, and not to mention guilt trip me into taking care of not one, or two hoes, but three of you deadweight fucking cunts, like holy fucking hell do you really expect me to work a dead end job for the rest of my life without at least giving me the luxury of smoking weed in the house, or drinking alcohol, and that's not even getting to my uncle who while did try to acquire a job, would constantly fucking test me to the point we almost started throwing hands at each other, but it ended with us just wrestling a bit until he called for a truce, but either way. I fucking love alcohol, wouldn't mind smoking weed if I could afford it, and by golly those psychedelic gummy mushrooms are really hit or miss.

>>77319103
Lmao retard, start friendzoning women before they reject you, its free preselection and access to her friends

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>>77319193
Yeah, because becoming deathly sick or tragically mangled would be a great boon to your life. As long as theres time on the clock, theres still time to change direction. Godspeed anon, you have faulty programming to rewire.

>>77319368
>its free preselection and access to her friends
Having female friends as a man is a meme. I tried that a few times and I was always kept around on the back burner whenever she wanted attention. Never did she introduce me to anybody else. I didn't even express that much interest in her or she was the one always texting first so I don't even think I was kept as an orbiter. It didn't really make sense.

I am very depressed again. Spent most of the last week wasting my life.

Yesterday I went for a walk in a forest and then a bike ride through farmland. It helped. I'm going to go to the gym today and train because I can't make excuses anymore.

>>77319368
I'm 32. For most of my adult life I had female friends. They're shit friends. They have inciative and they don't contribute equally to friendships. In like 15 years only one friend tried to set me up with someone. Meme

>single
>30s
spoiled goods

>>77319441
men and women yep

>>77319410
Same and one even set up another friend in front of me
It's hard to not think I'm not the ugliest sack of shit on the planet after going through that one

>>77319410
maybe they felt like you werent good enough for their friends

>3 months away from 28
Honestly the amount of problems I could talk about are too much for a single post, but really the fact that I've wasted my entire life is starting to catch up to me
I have some friends but the fact that I'm NEET and a virgin only makes the feeling of inadequacy whenever they complete another milestone in their life hit harder
I hate the fact that there are obvious steps to take to fix my life but I fail to take them because of anxiety and pessimism and hopelessness and IBS, failing at every single attempt to come out of my shell has done permanent damage to my psych

>>77319517
Be grateful you still have friends. I'm 28 and basically have none

Barr Hill, on the rocks. Thank you.

Cleaned up my apartment, went for a long ass drive out in the countryside. Cooked some chuck roast.

Pretty lonely lately. Dad died earlier this year. Spent most of last year in my home town dealing with his decline. He was the last of my immediate family that I grew up with that was still alive. I have half siblings that I love that are still around but they're all 20+ years older than me and didn't grow up with us and get offended when I talk about it. My dad's family blew him off twice while he was on hospice even though they were 2 hours away. And now they wanna fucking call and text all the god damn time.

I just want to deal with all this resentment. It feels very paralyzing sometimes, being angry at the world and the circumstances I was forced into.

>>77319482
Well then why does every other schmuck I know have the same experience. It's endemic.

>>77317445
Just some water for me.
Had a good weekend. A few years ago I moved away from chicken/rice/broccoli every meal, and try to eat plenty and enjoy cooking more. Sometimes I get stuck and have to buckle down and make sure I'm eating enough. Random youtube video was about boiled chicken wings, and I figued why not I'll try it. Was actually pretty good, was shocked.
Beyond that, cut my parents grass, ate dinner with them. Took a walk at a local nature preserve.
Was a good weekend.

>>77318680
>2 liters of beer
thanks, past me. this morning felt like absolute shit. fuck off with your stupid ideas about drinking in the future.
>t. slight hangover

>reddit
>nostupidquestions
>"guys my wife has been gaining some weight... we both eat fairly healthy so not much to do there, but she's 5'1 and currently 220-260 pounds"
Thread comments are pure ragebait. 2000+ morons telling him it must be perimenopause, some saying they can't understand how he could be losing attraction to her. Nobody questioning the "we both eat fairly healthy" obvious bullshit. I knew there was a lot of delusion out there but this is insane. Has the world actually gone crazy?

>single
>been a bit of a whore lately since I've been feeling good and confident and women like that
>classic case of every single other girl I sleep with I just miss other ones I was with before
>emptiness consumes me a bit

At least other things are good, hobbies are fun, seeing family again soon, I dunno. It's not like it's wrong of me to have multiple people I sex as a single person, but I feel like I need to find one person I really want to be with and commit and be happy and in love with

>>77319793
>Has the world actually gone crazy?
yes but also a lot of people don't actually understand what "healthy" in the context of food means. an avocado is healthy, but it's also insanely calorie dense and if you turn them into guacamole, add some smoked salmon and poached eggs and throw all that on a piece of sourdough, you're off with a healthy but very rich breakfast. and many people eat something similar each and every day without realizing how much energy they actually consume.

>>77319798
it's a fair point, but in this case a bit generous. A 5'1 woman is not reaching 220 lbs eating avocado and salmon

>>77319793
get chummed daggot

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>have best friend
>Genuinely amazing, rock solid person. Vibe with her like I've never vibed with anyone else. Not enough of a trainwreck for me to develop romantic or sexual feelings for
>beginning of this year get blackout drunk at her and her boyfriend's apartment and end up in the psych ward after I expressed pretty severe suicidal thoughts
>They visit me almost every day, promise nothing happened between us that night. She promises me she'll always be there for me
>about 10 days after I get out they ghost me with no explanation
>See her at work a month later when I'm finally cleared to come back
>She apologizes for the ghosting and seemed genuinely upset about it
>But turns out something did happen, I made her uncomfortable because I was touching her. Rubbing her lower back and getting really close to her. Wasn't interpreted as sexual which it wouldn't have been, but triggered bad memories for her
>Said just needed space
>that was almost 4 months ago, haven't seen or heard from her in a couple months since she took a leave of absence from work for other reasons
>tried to reach out a month ago with something light, no response

For some reason it hurts the most when things are going really well for me. I'm up can't sleep at 5AM crying because I had an amazing time with a girl I really like and I can't tell the first person I wanna share good news to. Everything else in my life is going amazing and I can't share it with one of the few people I'd actually want to. I have a poor relationship with most of my family, I genuinely consider her my "actual family". And now I'm not sure if I'll ever see her again. I think this is the first time I've experienced grief.

I miss her so much bros. Not a day goes by where I don't gotta fight the urge to text her something funny/retarded people we know did or share something good going on. I know I fucked up, I don't blame her. I've never missed anyone to this extent before. Genuinely feels like there's a part of me missing.

>>77319999
Grow up

>>77319999
There's probably more going on anon. Assuming that's all that happened it's really not all that bad on it's own. They reassured you after the incident only to pull away a decent amount of time after. My bet the boyfriend prolly got jealous. Sucks considering it seems to be platonic on your end but id prolly be jealous too watching my girlfriend promise to always be there for a different heterosexual man

>>77319999
>>have best friend
>>Genuinely amazing, rock solid person. Vibe with her
Whoops, stopped reading there
She's causing you a problem isn't she? Your bestest friend?
Cut it out

>>77317445
I got a new neighbor and he rides a Harley. He’s like 30 and looks about how you would expect. No, not like a tough biker like a soiboy chud trying to look hard. It’s not even an Iron or one of the cool bikes at least. This thing is loud hence my description. It wakes me up every night. I don’t know what to do. Would it be absurd if I asked the HOA to make him walk it out to the street to start it? He starts it and just sits there for over 10 minutes letting it warm up and then gets him sometime later doing the same thing so I’m being woken up multiple times. His parking spot is under my window. I didn’t sleep at all last night because he left right as I was drifting off and then I couldn’t fall back asleep. I called out sick today because I’m not commuting over an hour working 10 hours dealing with my retarded coworkers fucking up nonstop then driving home 1.5 hours on 0 sleep. I just don’t know what to do. I’m surprised some of the elderly tenants haven’t raised hell about it yet. He does this outside of the condominiums time period where it’s okay to make some noise.

>>77319999
Be honest with yourself. You like her. You want to fuck her. Everyone knows it so be honest with yourself about it. It’s OKAY. It would be weird if you didn’t. Grow the fuck up and come to realize platonic male and female friendships rarely exist. Even life long ones where you guys grew up together are rarely ever 100% platonic. It’s natural. Most people are not honest about this. Men usually lie because they have an incentive to do so and women don’t admit it because they’re stupid and don’t possess the same level of consciousness as men.
Man the fuck up, find a new bitch. Male and female relationships do not exist at least one party is always hopeful something more will happen.

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>>77317907
>>77317953
It's short brown people shit. Completely disagree with the other anon who says they do it because they hate you. It's like saying, "Well the Middle East hates Murica cuz freedoms!" Bullshit. Brown people often come from shitty homes and shitty backgrounds where the biggest guy wins. Literally Orkz logic. And if they think they can beat you, a tall white guy, by God they'll do it.

At my last job this 40-something spiclet manlet on coke (got arrested for it after he left) tried to play grab-ass with me, a 6'3", 225lb, "built like a linebacker" white guy after taking some MMA classes. Not once but TWICE he tried it when I could hold him in place and I could move him around like a small shopping cart.

Brown midgets ALWAYS want to play David and Goliath and, as the other anon says, if you are any bit on the spectrum and want to be peaceful, they'll take you as an opportunity to do so. Never start a fight but if they instigate something, be damned sure to finish it.

>>77319999
>Abandons you when you needed her
Wow, what a great friend. You gotta face it, she just liked your attention.

>>77317907
Just laugh it off. I worked in enough restaurant kitchens back in the day to figure out, just ignore their pecking order bullshit. Be friendly and just smile when they front. You are literally above them, no need to prove anything. Their aggression shouldn't even clock on your radar, no more than a kid's would. Make sure you don't jester for them, though. You can be friendly, but only in the way you'd pal around with a child.

You'll go through a phase where they think you're a weirdo for it, and then they'll get over it.

>>77317445
I fucked up a took a megadose of cagrillintide by accident, spent Thursday-Saturday vomiting and driving in and out of fever dreams.
Still feel like dogshit even though I need to get back to work.
I hate being retarded.

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>>77317445
Water for me barkeep, almost 7 months sober

>Women keep matching and ghosting on apps
>No type of communication from curiosity to horniness to blithe polite small talk keeps them around
>Birthday coming up and no wife
So like, should I give up and see a stylist and try to be a normie at this point? My hair is long but the few girls I do hook up with tell me I'm masculine and man pretty so I think it's a filtering thing, but there's no excuse to get 50+ matches a month and barely land 3 dates. I'm not ugly or balding, I get the initial interest but few girls put any effort in. Closest I get is when I call tell they read smut and ask about that and turn the conversation sexual but it feels so cheap and pandering.
I'm open to any and all suggestions, have already viewed some vids on youtube but playwithfire is a scammer and I'm not fucking retarded like the zoomers that go "Damn I could eat your ass for days get over here"

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>>77319517
Never give up anon, I managed to escape a bad upbringing and introvertedness halfway through highschool and into my freshman year of college before getting crushed with a parent dying and spiraling back into psuedo-NEETdom between 19-22. Picked my shit up and lost weight and grew out my hair and *really* worked on my ability to chat and talk to random people wherever and whenever and people now only know me as a gregarious, warm, and enrapturing conversationalist... their words, not mine.
Read how to win friends and influence people and start by chatting up people in your proximity anytime you're outside. Look up the "grandpa chatting" method, say you're standing in line at the store, ask the person in front of you "Hey you got the organic avocados, are they good?" doesn't matter if you've had em, you're flexxing the approach and open skill and developing conversations- this also serves to make you less shy and build up good experiences communicating with randoms. From there, just keep getting out. I was a virgin way late but landed an incredible FBB girl because I never gave up and took action.

>>77319410
>I'm 32. For most of my adult life I had female friends. They're shit friends.
Important steps, if they're into you or its in the inbetween, you friendzone them BEFORE they can reject you. And then you dont treat it like a normal friendship, you treat her like a bro without the effort you would normally put into maintaining the relationship, almost like letting her orbit you

>>77320767
>how to win friends and influence people
>i got my life together at 22
>bladerunner animu ugu faggotry
>he says to a 28yo neet
Shut the fuck up, you stupid kid.

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>>77320767
>Never give up anon
Stopped reading right there. Fight on!

>>77320810
Another butthurt crab in the bucket lurker, go back to freddit or just do us the favor and finally end yourself

>>77320490
I think part of why it’s even registering on my radar is that I’m not where I would like to be. I try to look back when I was on top of stuff and winning and can only ever remember a few very blatant instances of someone undeniably lower than me trying to be seen like passive aggressive but direct and semi confrontational beta shit testing that always blew up in their face. But I have to think the same shit I described still happened I just didn’t notice it because I was too occupied on more important stuff and generally having a good time. Some good news I have found some openings for different jobs than I was hoping for with a fat pay increase doing stuff I still wanna be doing and applied. If I can get those it means a lot for me.
>can pay off outstanding debt within 12 months
>can afford to get new used car that I want
>can get some stuff I have held back on buying
>savings grow
>investment/retirement accounts will begin growing
So maybe it will all change.
>>77320413
Well that’s kind of part of what gets me here. They don’t actually want a fight. Most people are not truly confrontational which is why it’s so indirect and passive. So the situation is literally just equivalent to a girlfriends bitchy fat friend being a cunt and making snide remarks to herself the entire time whenever you see her, she doesn’t want to personally be involved in any problems but she’s gonna try her hardest to cause them. If you call her out she’ll gaslight and claim not to have said anything and try to make you look crazy. It’s like having a roach in your house. You forget it’s there until 3am you get some water and see it scurrying under the fridge then you’re annoyed, any time you try to get it it flees.


To be frank I do not really care about the WHY all that much I just wish to be left alone. It does bother me having someone so much weaker than myself so hyperfixated on me. It’s weird, if not just ridiculous

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>>77317445

Just a Coke Zero, please. I've been real down lately and booze isn't gonna help. I'm 35 now and definitely not where I thought I would be by now. Wife, kids, degree, real estate, etc. but no good career or prospects on a decent job. Right now it's part time pay while my wife suffers through her bullshit corporate career (we really just need the insurance). I'm fairly healthy overall though my diet needs some work. I've sort of hit a plateau in terms of fitness because I haven't changed anything up either. Something's gotta give

>>77320754

Ask the woman if she shits with that ass, women love a good compliment

>>77320754
>apps
>wife
I have no fucking clue where to direct you, but I can say you're looking in the wrong place
Some retard will pop up and say their friend's brother found his wife on tinder 12 years ago but apps are for sex which is why your sexual approach is working

>>77320823
>my generic bitch advice is totally gonna help
Get a fucking clue, you fuckboy.
>bro how do i lose weight
>"just eat a sald, dude! what? my advice is perfect."

>>77320834
>They don’t actually want a fight.
So who fucking cares? Either ignore them, double down looking them dead in the eyes, or directly confront them about it in private. FFS, you fucking woman.

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Is it unusual to not look at people when walking down the street or at the gym?
I just kind of just look forward and people sometimes glance or even stare at me and I don't know if they want me to make eye contact or something.
Same thing with my housemates. I don't look at them unless they say hi.

>>77319793
Reddit is just utter garbage

>>77320754
Get off the apps retard, socialmaxx or die forever alone

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joined some online communities to try and repair the damage to my communication abilities caused by a couple years of remote work followed by a year of being a hikikomori.
my body reacts to voice chatting with strangers like it's a life or death fight: vocal chords and throat just locking up to the point where I can barely speak, high pulse, slower thinking.
bought a bottle of ashwagandha capsules since it worked for me in the past. didn't want to resort to this crutch because it makes me feel nothing and I'm already numb but I think I need it at this point.

>>77320883
I'm not a scum-sucking normie, and normies thinking drinking or stuffing their fat faces along with some alcohol is "hanging out".
Tried hiking and activity groups and they were full of chunguses.

Turns out after getting a job where I have to work with a bunch of old guys I'm not some awkward autist. It's unironically everybody else in my generation who is socially retarded. I'm best friends with the boomers joking all day while the young people at my job will ignore me until they need something. Not even saying good morning.

>>77321534
Too true, millenials and zoom zooms clam up, older gens can try to politick but generally are gregarious.

We lost.......

>>77317445
>8oz vodka
>2 beers
The bartender is me

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I'm pretty sure I've never felt manly or confident in my entire life. Just a whole lifetime of feeling weak and emasculated. No, I don't want to be a tranny. I just want to feel like a man for once. I workout, I'm in the best shape of my life, and it really hasn't helped.

>>77322563
I know this feel, i never have the self confidence to talk positively about myself. I went for a job interview recently and my feedback was basically that i didn't say a single positive thing about myself and what i can offer to the job etc and they're right, i don't think i can offer anything, i think nothing about myself. I wish i was some hyper self confident chad, even if it was complete delusion, the false confidence alone gets you jobs and women.

>>77321534
I found this out too. It’s normal to joke around and be friendly, it’s normal to do so many things these retards made me feel weird for doing or feeling like doing. Once you see it you can’t unsee it. I’m 30 btw. It’s for sure true for the generations below me down to like 18-20, but also true for my generation. They’re insufferable and super socially inept.

>>77319793
Reddit is an echo chamber. If you want to do an experiment make 2 accounts. Make these posts months apart but first type up a post asking for advice about your gf wanting to go clubbing and having male friends.Then make a second version where genders are reversed. Maybe even make the second version from the females POV and keep it vague say the guys are all besties and just coworkers who are like brothers to you lol. Post them on some dating advice sub and do it months apart. Watch the very different responses you get.
>fitness
They’re retarded. You can very clearly and specifically ask for advice like “this is my diet to a T I am choosing to do some extra cardio to burn some extra calories instead of lowering my intake can you recommend any forms other than swimming that won’t be rough on my knee injury. Please do not recommend I do not do cardio it is important to me and I care about my cardiovascular health, I prefer to lose fat this way instead of a 1000 deficit.” and you’ll get a ton of responses saying “cardio isn’t necessary. You can just lower calories. LE ABS ARE HECKIN MADE IN LE HECKIN KITCHERINOOOOO” fucking imbeciles are just regurgitating old advice and sayings from roided out pros out of magazines from the 90s/early 2000s that they got off BB dot com forums.

>>77321534
> It's unironically everybody else in my generation who is socially retarded
Right anon, literally everyone else your age is the social retard except for you, they’re all the reason you don’t have social relationships. That totally sounds reasonable. It’s surely not that you, the guy on 4chan, may be socially offputting to everyone. It’s everyone else who is the problem

>work as teacher
>schizophrenic (she hid this from me) ex girlfriend makes false allegation when I finally break up with her and we have big fight over me not wanting to potentially have kids with her because she's unstable and has a drug dealer family
>get investigated, no charges because didn't do anything, dropped
>years pass and I move locations, so have to quit one position and apply at a new district
>on the last steps to confirm my new job, find out I no longer can get a clear security check due to a history of police interaction, regardless of the outcome
>now blocked out of career of nearly ten years
>trying to find new job in collapsed Canadian job market for the past year
>burned my savings because employment insurance claim denied since I quit my job having no idea I wouldn't be able to move into a new position immediately
>moving back in with my parents at 33
>having to spend thousands in legal fees to *maybe* have the bullshit several year old allegation removed from police records
She won in the end. I'm so tired man. I have no idea what I'm gonna do at this point other than just go take a one year trade course. When it all ended I was able to move on and be positive because I just went back about my life. If I had known I'd never be able to work in my career again if I left that one job I would have just stayed at the same location forever. I have no money left, and I've applied for quite literally hundreds of jobs, got a few interviews. At best, hiring managers even for good jobs want to bring you on as a casual worker not full time so they don't have to pay benefits. She had threatened me before with doing some shit to me if I ever upset her too, or to kill herself. There's nothing I can do about it now.

>>77322785
>see Anon, literally everybody who treats you well and joke around is as maladapted as you, you all are collectivelly the problem. If people from your generation treat you like shit it's because you deserve it, and if boomers are nice to you they are, well, wrong for not treating you like shit as well
Things jews will say to demoralize.

>>77318718
I was you. Jesus saved me and gave me purpose. People usually disregard, but I tried everything, it's Jesus. Seek first the Kingdom of God and all these things will be added to you. Your Father knows what you have need of and is good and able.

>>77323059
bruuuuuhhhhh

>>77318718
So because u needed a gurantee before you could approach the girl you didn't approach and so u started trying to attempt to get a guarantee which is looking at her over and over again
U must act without a guarantee and know that the big other looking at you is paper thin and is a part of the structure of our minds and how language works and structures us. So u must act without a guarantee incels are just people who couldn't handle risk or got fucked bad enough and are exposed to raw reality and now their fantasy cannot mediate it and make it bareable

>>77323154
Jesus only gave u purpose because it's like a starter deck that has all the parts to it to create a ideal situation for your desire to circulate in a way that generates meaning. Heaven for example is a insurmountable gap of the BESTtm place you can get to but only if u die so... It's a place u cannot ever reach in this life but that u will go to.. that for example, u can enjoy the desire and the fantasy of going to heaven ur entire life. The "big other" is god etc etc