I was at the gym today and a guy in my school year came up to me (college gym and I'm here over the summer, I've spoken to him a few times but not much) and said hello and started talking to me about classes we'd had together and and asked what classes I'd be taking next semester. At one point I mentioned that I hadn't been that social during the school year since I didn't know about some drama he referenced and he said I should come to some student-affiliated bar events specifically, and that "I might even meet my future wife." What was that about? And what does proper gym etiquette require from me from here? If I see him in the future should I go out of my way to greet him and say hi from now on like he did, or is just a wave and like a head nod ok? I'm not the most social guy on the planet so this is new territory for me.
>>77337384you're an autist and probably a virgin faggot and he smelled it from afar and thought of helping you he sounds like a lukewarm christian, is this in american south perchance?
>the whole shebang in generalMost likely just someone who is sociable trying to chat up some person who shares interests with them (fitness and I assume subjects)>"I might even meet my future wife." Probably an attempt at a joke.As for your behaviour going forward: You don't need to do anything. If you are fine by yourself you can ignore him or (the more polite option) tell him you are not the most social person and not interested in going to any parties.If however you are interested in contact, greetings are a good way to stay in a persons mind, just a quick nod or fist bump are great to signal to someone else "I'm open to further interaction" and you can go from there. Personally I think you should really take his invite and check out the party. Events like these are generally how one meets others and you can confidently assume everyone there is at least open to you initiating a conversation. Even if you don't like it, you showed the guy you are interested and open and can explain to him it's not your preferred setting.Good luck, don't think about it too much is honestly the right call once you are there but I know that's hard af
>>77337394>is this in american south perchance?Yeah, how could you tell? Also I'm not gay
>/fit/ are scared and confused by normal human interaction
>>77337384>Guy attempts to be social towards the turbo autism 4channer>4CHAN WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT??Anon you are such an Autist. He was just being a normal guy.Just be natural next time you see him and don't ignore him. Start with shit like "hey man hows it going" and try to have a normal conversation. If it takes too long or he is bothering you just go like "haha thats cool, anyway gotta get my work out in, see you in a bit".You don't need to marry him or anything but he seems like a cool guy that is actively trying to be your friend. Just do your best and take it as social skills practice.
>>77337403>Personally I think you should really take his invite and check out the party. Events like these are generally how one meets others and you can confidently assume everyone there is at least open to you initiating a conversationThanks, and I honestly might try, I just get really anxious at social events like that not knowing what to do or say so I usually avoid them but I do feel like I need to force myself into more of that stuff. At a certain point being scared of social events becomes very pathetic I feel and I've got to be at least closing in on that cutoff point.
>>77337405by the innocence of his desire to help you, thinking that "bar is where you find your future wife", that being in a bar is some event of socialization and that you guys are in college which means bars are some this ephemeral thingquintessential american college humor movie style plot, my 142 IQ helpsbut I just called you a virgin faggot, you aren't a faggot or gay, you're just virgin and you reek of autism, he wants to help you and has no ill will towards you, you should go with him, it will help you with your socialization skills
>>77337418Social skills are... a skill, meaning you can practice it and learn it. You are bad at it now, but this is how it develops.Its normal to get anxious at these events because you aren't used to them. Its okay. If you feel too bad just call an uber and go home, thats fine. There will be more events in the future.Being outside your comfort zone is where most of your growth as a person happens. And If you hate it, you can always just not do it again, but at least you tried.That being said, social skills are one of the best skills you can develop in life. It will boost your life a lot by just being naturally friendly and nice to people.
>>77337384It would be good for you to socialize. You're at the gym to improve your health I imagine. Don't forget about your mental health. Studies have shown humans benefit from having friends and social interaction and you just got handed a freebie. Next time you see him in the gym, go say hi and tell him that bar thing sounded fun and that he should let you know the next time he goes. Instant friend with chance to multiply. You have nothing to lose and can only gain. Stick to beer at the bar if you don't drink a lot and have a water after every two or three.
>>77337421Classes don't start again and most of the student body doesn't come back until August, should I go to bars in the area and try talking to people as practice? My summer job is super chill so I have a lot of free time. I don't want to completely humiliate myself the first time I go with classmates I know, so strangers as a test run might be better.>>77337417Should I invite him someplace? Or see if he invites me somewhere? Or just keep talking to him at the gym if I see him until the bar event and then try talking to him there?
>>77337418Far be it from me to recommend the liquid devil, but....well alcohol is popular as a social lubricant for a reasonOther than that go at it from the perspective of learning a new routine. Do some reps of small talk and see how your verbal muscles and confidence grow (incredibly botched metaphor, but I hope you get what I mean, be there but dont force yourself to be the life of the party or anything)
>>77337429>>77337433>>77337436Ok thanks, I am definitely gonna try to go to them and be more outgoing next year. This year I basically just went to class, went to the gym, went home, and studied.
>>77337434>should I go to bars in the area and try talking to people as practice?yes>I don't want to completely humiliate myself the first time I go with classmates I know, so strangers as a test run might be better.keep him close, he wants whats best for you and that is rare nowadays where people only care about themselves and their interests.... which is why you intuitively thought he was gay
>>77337434>Should I invite him someplace? No need, he is just a guy that you talk to. You aren't trying to fuck him or anything.For now just focus on doing talk with him without dropping your spaghetti and see if he is a cool guy. After a while just go like "hey so where are those bars you talked about? I don't know much around here haha"If you don't know how to start just try to find common ground, you are both at the gym, just ask if he follows any routine and whatever he says just try to be interested in it. Like "oh really, you do that routine? thats cool, did you hear about it from someone? I do this other one but im sure sure if its the best". Try to probe for common interests, videogames, hobbies, classes, whatever.I'm gonna be honest, he probably knows you are a bit of a sperg because of his "you dont socialize much" comment so he is probably expecting you to be a bit weird. Just try to be a cool guy without forcing it. He will probably invite you places if you guys become friends.You will get the hang of it. Just try to practice socializing with him. It takes a while, don't beat yourself up if you say something stupid sometimes.
>>77337450Any people? And do you have any tips for doing that?>which is why you intuitively thought he was gayI didn't think he was gay, part of what we talked about was his girlfriend.
>>77337384Just stay polite and friendly but say no thanks if you're not interested. There's a certain ignorance from normie extroverts that makes them presume you should be just like them. It's not their fault, they're mostly just oblivious midwits who know nothing outside their little bubble.
>>77337421Are you an INTJ by any chance?
>>77337529>INTJthat psychological test is astrology for men, proven to shift with age and experiences and less reliable marker of any personality traits than people thinkI was never assessed as INTJ, mostly as INTP or ENTP
>>77337529lmfao
>>77337529I fucking laugh every time I see this posted.
>>77337454>I'm gonna be honest, he probably knows you are a bit of a sperg because of his "you dont socialize much"I was the one who made that comment though.But thanks, I'll definitely do the bar events when classes begin again.
>>77337443as someone who finished college a few years ago and did the go to class-go straight home thing, please go be more social, its genuinely hard to express how much more difficult it is to find friends when youre 27+
>>77337384>once went over to the squat rack>took off and loaded plates>started warming up>really pretty chick walks up to me>she says something but I cant hear her because I had 1 earphone in>I just smile and nod at her>quickly start squatting>she’s still saying something but I cant hear>panic>mid squat blurt out "yeah squattings my favourite, big weights you know how it is">thought she was trying to strike up a convo about my workout>do a set>notice her bottle lying at the base of the squat rack since I started>she was trying to tell me she was using it and I had racked her plates>enter pure autismo>while still resting the bar on my shoulders try asking her how many sets she had left>stutter bad>she doesnt hear what I said>I dont say anything else>rack the bar>immediately get my bag and leave the gym>driving home realise I left my towel hanging on the squat rackshe was a proper bombshell, that shit made me start going at 6 in the morning instead of evenings just to avoid any chances of seeing her again
>>77337907Does it get easier to get girlfriends when you've got an established career and aren't just a student though?
>>77337384Is literally every /fit/ poster autistic?
>>77337384>What was that about?CIA Honeypot, don't go
>>77337543wow, people change based on experiences?
>>77339233Owned that fraud
>>77337403Can confirm. I hate them so much it is unreal.
>>77337418Take a little bit of ghb and fuck a ho
>>77339502>ghbI looked it up and it said that's a rape drug. Anon?
>>77337384Is that dog real or AI?
>>77340189Real
>>77339867Dosage dependent, retard. Little for you, little more for her.
>>77342109And you will of course only be giving it to her with her fully informed and consenting right?
>>77338988kind of but not in a way you desire, I suppose. from my experience, it got easier for me because my peers are getting fat, losing hair, jumping from one shitty job to the next one, and their hedonistic lifestyle certainly doesn't help increase thier wealth while i impove slightly. however, if you don't use dating apps, the girls that you come in contact with are mostly damaged goods with too many emotional baggages, delusional, drama-seeking, as well as plenty of other toxic traits. plus, your work schedule may cockblock you big time. all in all, if you're still a full-time student, you should definitely get into dating, find someone who likes you and you don't dislike and go from there. dating is always messy, it only gets messier as you get old
>>77342163What if I'm extremely hesitant to get on dating apps because they feel like a humiliation ritual?
>>77342188check'ddid you just get dubs back to back?anyway, if you feel unformtable using it, then don't use it, I don't use it either. you can always find women somewhere else.
