You guys ever self sabotage once you start doing better at things? I am hitting that range now where it can appear like I have gone to the gym before to people. I have reached this stage many times when younger then gave up. The getting to this stage is a grind where its full of me dreaming of getting to some big goals but not even being close to itNow I am seeing actual results and the pressure comes on of becoming actually good at what I am doing or even above average. I tend to quit things around this area or I spin wheels. Anyone else? How did you overcome this? What is wrong with me It's like I am afraid of being successful
>>77348050You need to learn to have your biggest enemy yourself.Hate that motherfucker trying to sabotage your gains. Fucking asshole mocking you in the mirror. You need to start screaming ME! ME! ME! Like Lour Ferrigno yelling Arnold or Big Lenny doing Daryl reps.Man fuck that gut.
>>77348057Thanks chief
>>77348050being /fit/ is part of the healthy™ lifestyle and longevity project. If you're just doing it to get jacked or whatever you're missing the entire point.
>>77348050Same kind of. I honestly enjoy the process and grind more than the outcome. In fact, it has so often been the case that the "reward" is a disappointment that I think I subconsciously try to avoid it at all costs, either by quitting early or refusing to accept that I've actually achieved what were previously my goals.
>>77348050Yes, that’s called the Jonah complex. Well, for one thing, you should figure out why you’re doing this and realize that you’re not doing it for others. Whatever expectations others may have about your appearance or physical fitness, that really shouldn’t matter to you. As for me, it’s exactly the opposite. Since people see that I lift weights, I’m deliberately not going to stop, because I don’t want to be known as the guy who gave up. Maybe that mindset can help you.
i dont have this problem
>>77348050Fuck no. Redirect that energy- sabotage others when they start doing better.
Man, I’m telling you right now you have to quit with this thinking brother. It literally destroyed my life at 33 and I don’t even know if it’s recoverable. I self sabotage so much that I feel the most worthless guy on earth despite being successfull. >People complement me on my physique? >nah they are probably trying to make me feel good because suck >getting promotion at work?>Nah it’s not because I’m good it’s because I been working a lot and it happened by luck>Parents being proud of me? >Nah, I’m gonna do something to upset them anyway I can go on of days btw. I always shoot myself on the foot and it literally killing me
>>77350498Self-destructive OCDI have it too
never have i ever
>>77348084Shut up faggot! Live Large! Leave a Large Coffin!
>>77348057Based self-hating anon
Happens all the time with everything in my life, but for some reason fitness sticks in. Training to run long distances somehow helps to deal with it a lot
>>77350498damn bro take some shrooms and go hiking or somethingu got some demons
>>77348050>anond made it>got mires from normies>got a hot goth gf>chill with gf, don't hit the gym>break up>anon is now washed up dyel empty shell
>>77348084Fag
>>77348057Actual good advice. My life is always better when I'm fucking angry and pissed off all the time.When things are chill suddenly I don't care about becoming the best version of myself.
>>77348050I know exactly what this is. It's what lacan calls surplus enjoyment. What happens is that you have a fantasy of a goal that you are enjoying aka you becoming your goal body. Once you start making progress with that goal then you have to contest with the reality. Whatever dreams you have concerning your progress or goal body is now in danger of collapsing from A: the fact that you might not make itB: the fact that even when you do make it, it won't complete you because of the inherent gap of language and permanent symbols in that they cannot fully describe anything. In other words the ideal fantasy in your head will never fully reflect itself in reality because it is a fantasy of a gurantee of completeness, a gurantee which does not exist in real life. So instead of making progress on your goal you circle around it looking for a guarantee, this is where neurosis comes from. So what you need to do is realize that a guarantee is a fantasy and completion is a fantasy because of how language itself is structured. When you look at your body in the mirror and if you think your body can offer you a real sense of completion then there will always be that "one last thing wrong then I will be complete" because that is actually like hitting the Minecraft bedrock you are hitting the inherent gap of language itself. So what you should do is pursue your goal, enjoy the fantasy don't change anything BUT understand that it's just a engine to get where you want it doesn't exist. Just how when I DJ I think of all the girls I want to fuck but in reality life isn't like a rap music video however I will use that fantasy to mediate the pointlessness of life and get me to my goal changing your relationship with the symbolic world and pursuing your goal anyways, is how you escape neuroticism and endless circling, alternatively meditation will cure most of this if done properly.
>>77351672Not op, but I have lived that cycle more than once.
>>77348050I never had that problem, because I never got good at anything.
>>77351702>changing your relationship with the symbolic worldHow?
>>77351715Non clinical anxiety can be described as "looking to the thing that you perceive gives you value or meaning and asking what do you want me to do" that thing is the imaginary god we all have that looks at us. For me is women, when I talk to women I used to freeze up and get meek because for me that was the thing looking at me and giving me value and meaning so instead of acting I wanted to know what it wants from me what do I do to appease it? Lacan calls this the big other. To change your relationship with the symbolic world you simply realize that these are just structural mechanisms of the mind. God doesn't exist it's structural it tells you what you are supposed to do. We get our desires from what we percieve others want. Language cannot fully describe anything and how do we think how do we exist how do we refer to ourselves? Language and permanent symbols so this generates a inherant "something is missing" it generates lack. From lack desire to fill the lack is born. If I think fucking a goth will fulfill me my desire will circle that. If I act towards my desire accepting that I might get rejected and completion is a myth I can move on easily, if I don't act and I try to find a guarantee that she will fuck me first I am actually just prolonging the enjoyment of the fantasy itself, and thats what we truly desire, desire itself. By looking for a guarantee I can enjoy the fantasy that she will fuck me further, if I try I might expose that fantasy to the world and it might be shattered, etc etc etc this is what lacan calls , the graph of desire. You need to realize that there is no god looking at you but just your own mind working normally. You must act without a guarantee as a guarantee is a structural myth that cannot exist in reality You act knowing that this doesn't define you and you do it anyways. Once you achieve said goal your enjoyment of desire will collapse and your desire will eventually try to fill lack with something else
>>77351715If you want to do it for real and not force it because it will be very painful. Is you can achieve this naturally through an hour of meditation a day, focused breath meditation. Build up to an hour over the course of a year or two and you will feel like you have unlocked the life console cheat command table, it's difficult to describe but if u are neurotic it will melt all of the invisible walls and it will settle your mind so you aren't spending every waking second in your brain in a neurotic ocd frenzy like I used to
>>77351737Man I feel like hiring you as my life coach niggaAlright, here is what I want to ask you. What do you draw on for inner strength, in your sustem of thought/beliefs?(e.g. if you got locked up for a long time and needed to survive psychologically and resist intimidation/beatings without any human support)
Bump
>>77348050Anything "above average" takes disproportionately more effort to not only achieve, but maintain. That's Hollywood actors stop training immediately after a film shoot ends. Better to aim for good enough.
>>77348050I just keep going to the gym. It's not that hard nigga just go.
