>Alrighty, sir we're almost done signing you up for gym membership.>We just need one emergency contact that is not your mother. And yes we will call the number to verify.>Also please sign this acknowledgment that you may only cancel your membership after a 10 minute interview with a supervisor about why you found our gym unsatisfactory.
>also we have a strict no singles policy during peak female hours between 7AM and 11PM. We don't want the ladies to feel uncomfortable
>>77363985good thing I made a shiv out of crusty creatine residue on bottom of my forgotten car shaker on my way to this gym and hidden it between my buttcheeks just in case I needed to claw my way out of a normie gym
>>77363985>charge back>reissue card with new ccv it shows up 2 days later>life goes on
literally had this happen>guy's been slicktalking me like a car salesman, asking about my lifts, joking with me about gym memes like he gets a commission from every gym membership or something>he asks for emergency contact>too scared to make up a fake number because I thought they had a database to check>I feel the subconscious need to impress him so I chose the only female friend I had in high school who I haven't talked to in years>he calls her up right there to verify>she picks up>"who? Oh anon? I haven't talked to him since high school. what is this about?"
>>77363985>>77363996It doesn't happen, retards. Gyms want the signup to be as smooth and effortless as possible. They don't want you thinking about emergency contacts in the 0.001% chance you actually get hurt doing something retarded, and even if you did get hurt they wouldn't give a fuck with the waivers included in the contract.
>gym membership form asks for photo proof of the past 5 parties i've attended
>>77363985>and for your security question. Name of first girlfriend?
>>We just need one emergency contact that is not your mother. And yes we will call the number to verify.Why the fuck would I not use my mother? She's the only person on this god-foresaken Earth who would react appropriately if I were in an emergency (ie, wouldn't laugh and would try to help me).
emergency contact? how about a fucking ambulance. what's my mother gonna do in an emergency situation?
>emergency contact: ______911Problem solved.
>>77363985>We just need one emergency contact that is not your motherTough tits
I signed up for a gym recently using a pre-paid visa card because I know these bastards always give you a hard time when you want to cancel your membership. When I want to stop going I'll just use up all the funds on the card and not even bother mentioning anything to them. Let them try to bill it until the end of time.
>we will need an emergency contact that is not your mother>for your password, the security question is the name of your first girlfriend
>>77364243But american-senpai, how are you going to pay for your gym membership if you go bankrupt?
>>77363985Just signed up for a new gym on a month basis. Already regret it. Just put my own number down as the contact, lol.On an unrelated note, what's the etiquette for getting out of the shower naked walking to your locker to get dressed? Am I supposed to wear a towel?
>go to random gym in philippines>look around>pay $18 for a month >get a penned in membership card with no lamination>ask the 4' 9" receptionist out for coffee after her shift and she agrees with a giggle>do my lifts go home and message her>fuck her later>never go back to the gym again
>>77364584You just paid $18 for sex in Philippines which is not that cheap.
>>77363985Ok I'll just give you my Dad as an emergency contact, kek. Easy solution.
>>77364579I want you to wear a towel. Not trying to see some faggot's tiny dick as I make my way to the toilets.
>>77363996I wish this was a true story.
>>77364236
>>77364648Instructions unclear, wore an enlarged peen prosthetic and peen-mogged at the Zoomies and Boomers.
>>77364579>On an unrelated note, what's the etiquette for getting out of the shower naked walking to your locker to get dressed? Am I supposed to wear a towel?Are you younger than 60? If yes, wear a towel. If no, who cares, you're going to be dead soon, why waste time?
