draw your schizophrenia demons here...Oekaki Post (Time: 1m, Replay: View)
>>831929help me anon, how do I make her stop talking to me about futa porn :(
>>831929oh fuck its like someone made a thread all for me
>>831929the watcher and observed
shoggoth
doodles
ghost
how do i draw
>>833171>>833172>>833174some of the best paintings/sketches I've seen in a minute, you're very talented.
welcome to the waking world>>833171i figure this one comes from my general paranoia and fear of being watched. i make art to cope with fear>>833172general psychosis stuff. my brain was a clusterfuck at the time so my hallucinations were just as clusterfucky. drawing this one scared me so not all the details are legible because my hand was shaking>>833173general psychosis, neutral.>>833174ghost amalgam, something that could have been but couldn't really come to be. just a jumble of brain soupthis new one's a self portrait, /i/'s been really good for my mental health. thank you everyone, i think i'll stick around
t'nochsometimes i communicate with my psychosis guys. in my mind i think they're beings just outside our own reality, living inbetween the tiny cracks imperceivable to most. this is their language, i've been trying to transcribe it for a while but to do so i need to pick out the glyphs inbetween the scribbles and it's also a tossup whether or not its information i even want.t'noch is a lesser deity, part of the one i called shoggoth earlier. i don't know shoggoth's true name, i just call it that because it looks like a writhing pile of gross.>>833170i forgot this one but this one's a mess. neutral, he's fine like that, he can't feel anything so don't worry. when souls don't get reworked into a tangible, real thing they join this lump. this is just a part of that lump, i've never seen the full thing nor do i really want to. everyone joins it eventually
my hand started hurting so i stoppedOekaki Post (Time: 23m, Replay: View)
>>833300>>833303i'm sorry you experience this, it's unfortunate and unfitting of a person of your caliber, i think your dichotomy between art and your illness allows you to express yourself in this way rather healthily all things considered healthyhow do you typically cope with it? what do you do for fun? has it impacted your hobbies, your art, your relationship with people at all? has anyone sought out to try to understood you or your problems? have you met anyone that has? i have to imagine you must feel pretty isolated in general.great drawings btw, same person complimenting you from before
>>833379i was diagnosed with early childhood schizophrenia at 11, so most of my life i've lived like this. to me, it's just existence, there's no way out of my head, i'm used to it and medication only goes so far. imagine it's like autism but inverted, because it kind of is. it's caused by the same gene, just on the other side of the DNA helix responsible for that neural pathway.if autism works like a linear path, then schizophrenia is like a skill tree. schizos have a lot of special interests that they spec into, they jump from point to point making all sorts of connections in their minds about things that seem only loosely related. that's also where the stereotype of schizos liking conspiracy theories comes from, a part of it is true! it's that whole missed connections/pattern recognition thing. even i used to use /x/.the biggest way it affects my life is the isolation. humans are social creatures, it's hard to escape your nature even if to me, the thought of other people is a little terrifying. i can't read other people's minds, the thought that they perceive reality different from the way i do is interesting, but also scary.but, everything's nuanced, nothing is entirely good or entirely bad. sometimes the hallucinations are positive, like >>833300sometimes they terrify me, but i turn that into creative works to cope. people like outsider art, i think it's because it comes from a place of incomprehensibility. my mind runs on cosmic horror by default, so i write a lot. i see things, so i draw things.even in my isolation, i don't ever feel all that alone. there are good voices in there too, some of them are funny and make me laugh. i'm hardly ever bored because i listen to the stories made up in my head.hallucinations are dependent on the subconscious emotions. i make art to escape fear and paranoia, so looking at my art, you tend to only see see the more terrifying side. there are good things too
it also affects my art style a lot. check out this bait! every piece of artwork i make has pieces of psychosis in it because that's just how i see the world
here's a painting of my cat
