tell them to take a shower

>>221699041
why would i care?

>>221699041
>I know bro, I've always known. I went to your Bar Mitzvah for Christ's sake

>>221699041
I'd probably ask intrusive questions because I don't know how people tolerate Judaism or Islam. Like how can you be part of a system that forces you to memorize a text that has 0 to do with your tribal legal code, then have a set of secondary texts (hadiths/Talmud) that are basically only read by some nonsensical Confucian-esque scholar elite and not at all by the general public. It's decentralized Catholicism, except no one knows how the canon is managed. I lose a lot of respect when people tell me they're Jewish or Muslim.
>inb4 you're a prottie
I'm atheist

>>221699041
do my best rabbi yosef mizrachi impression to woo her

>>221699041
Eat his ass probably. I love me some long gray hair.

>>221703033
>Like how can you be part of a system that forces you to memorize a text that has 0 to do with your tribal legal code
And Protestantism is different because…? Most Muslims don’t even read the Quran, your mullah is supposed to interpret it for you. Non-laity getting involved in reading sacred texts is only a thing in Judaism and Protestantism.

Why are Jews so averse to the word "Jew"? They always insist on saying "Jewish people" instead of just "Jew"

>>221703267
it's just a dirty sounding word

>>221703231
Protestantism only requires that you read one text then there's a billion denominations that have supplementary material or get tied into Freemasonry which often runs into the same issues as Islam or Judaism or sometimes even worse since it's overtly esoteric. Between the Abrahamic religions Catholicism is the most straightforward, it doesn't expect anything from the masses apart from pointless ritual and all of the internal politics are immensely cloistered and esoteric, more so than any other religion. It doesn't pretend otherwise, it's just literally every other system is decentralized, so Catholicism is more primitive in this respect. It also had most of its secular function stripped, they used to own outright over 1/3rd the land in Europe.

>>221703326
Cool it with the antisemitism

>>221703267
Same reason why goyim are averse to the words goy/goyim. Because it can be used as a slur even though it’s not a slur.

>>221703267
"As a Jew..." is when you know its not and noone wants to be associated with goyim pretending to be Jewish

>>221703033
Many wrong assumptions here, about both Judaism and Islam.

>how can you be part of a system that forces you to memorize a text
No one is forced to memorize anything.

>that has 0 to do with your tribal legal code
What do you mean?

>a set of secondary texts (hadiths/Talmud) that are basically only read by some nonsensical Confucian-esque scholar elite and not at all by the general public
Kind of true for the Talmud, but not at all for hadiths. Obviously the general Muslim public doesn’t know everything about hadiths, but they definitely know a certain number of them and are opinionated about it.

>It's decentralized Catholicism
So not Catholicism at all?

>except no one knows how the canon is managed
These religions are not about "managing a canon".

>>221703033
This is why hew says he's Jewish and not a Jew, so you won't throw retarded relgious questions

>>221703622
>Memorize
They go to school to learn how to recite the Torah or Quran. They go to madrasas to study the Quran while jews go to yeshivot, Protestants go to Sunday school at worst.
>Legal code
Sharia and Halakha
>Catholicism
Catholicism means universal not centralized. The fact you can have Jews in China and Muslims in Indonesia tells you that they believe their religion is universal.
>Canon
Tanakh/Talmud for jews and the Sunnah/hadiths for Muslims are both legal canons. They're roughly parallel to the catechism.

>>221699041
That's fine but I'm still going to be eating pork
and then this >>221703217

>>221699041
ok

>>221699041
Now I know, you just told me

>>221703942
Did you know my great grandpa is German

ew lol

>>221703834
You’re mixing truths with bullshit.

>>221703966
Fr or you playin?

>>221704114
No im fr, but you were supposed to reply nonchalantly "well now i know"

Probably ask lots of sperg questions like I do to my reverand. I don't understand Judaism at all. The entire old testament is tales about Jews turning away from their faith.

If you don't follow the laws as written in deuteronomy or can track your family lineage back 2700 years, why would you so confidently claim to be a Jew. It seems like a big larp. Why are these people not just Christians as it is the natural evolution of Judaism. It seems very contriarian.

No one can ever explain this to me.

>>221704124
I actually did want to reply with it at first but wasn’t sure if doing it twice would ruin it.

>>221704262
No that just makes the joke funnier

File: jewlatvia.jpg (138 KB, 1241x804)

138 KB JPG

Why do you hate Latvia so much

>>221703376
>Protestantism only requires that you read one text then there's a billion denominations that have supplementary material or get tied into Freemasonry which often runs into the same issues as Islam or Judaism or sometimes even worse since it's overtly esoteric.
Protestants are the opposite of esoteric. If anything their problem is that they leave no room for the mysteries