want to see how everything goes but vant be arsed staying alive to see it

>>223396502
:(

peered into the toilet after having a shit and it looked like something was swimming around underneath the toilet paper

Sup scottie

Just watched these auditors to see what I'm missing out on, on Friday and Saturday night and it's nothing id ever be interested in.

>>223396516
yeah sounds lovely that

>>223396529
Pound shop made in China rings

>>223396544
fucking screaming

>>223396533
it's a dull activity for dullards. would like to know what the kind of person who enjoys these looks like.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6_ebstVBjv8
I satisfy his definition of a boring person that gives at the end

guess who did nothing today

Brits out
Blacks in
Simple as so

decided I don't actually want to turn my life around. rather just be a dirty odious smelly little hateful incel, fuck you

We can talk about pingas if you fancy?

>>223396574
right... you watched over 7 minutes of this shite did you?

>>223396569
A lot of the people he meets knows who he is

>>223396533
not a fan of getting fanny lad?

>>223396608
yeah
nothing to do is there

>>223396544
Why don't we just send the boats to "Derry" and gives these twats what they want

>>223396582
not everybody will see this but basically what she's saying is women are only horny as teenagers but the become materialistic as they approach 30 and their hunger eclipses any sexual feelings they have

this is why a smart successful man always has sex with younger women

fucking SCREAMED at a seagull yesterday cos it nicked one of my chips and an old women started shouting at me trying to hit me with her bag saying "leave that creature alone" caused a right fucking scene when i just wanted an incel walk along the front

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>>223396502
Keep at it lad

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they finally got mousey....

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>You didn't check Trivago?

>>223396613
Why are you larping

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today's luncheon: beef, red pepper and onion

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#3DEM

>>223396656
classic rorke moment

>>223396582
>yes, this one
Literally just her admitting that she doesn’t find him attractive. Honestly, it’s incredibly sad how women dream of having so much but then settle with someone who they just aren’t attracted to at all. Then they just have sloppy, fat sex once a year until they die.

>>223396665
What the fuck

>>223396674
ive taken a load of girls home out clubbing friday and saturday nights (and thursday tbf) believe what you want dont care

>>223396680
still in the shelters are we? blitz got you shaking yeah?

Where's commiemong

>>223396680
Braising steak is for cooking low and slow you silly little twit

gyaldempedo got buck broken by janny in record time

>>223396665
Trspongme

>>223396718
cooks up fine in a pan

ziedy vs bowden oxford debate

>>223396690
The sexual habits of females and homosexuals are the same.

Abundance leads to decay. There's no romance when there are 50 men down the road and 50 million men on the other side of the screen waiting to pounce.

Hence, if you don't control them, they destroy themselves and everything else.

>>223396582
At 15 she likes prettyboys and her sexuality is purely visual. At 21 she likes handsome studs that can fuck her hard and make her feel something because she's already got triple digit bodycount, and also wants to feel protected. At 28, she wants a pathetic beta provider to put a roof over her head and grovel at her feet while she still fucks the prettyboy and handsome chad on the side.

Lucy Liu I will have sex with you but JUST this ONCE!!

>>223396690
>sloppy, fat sex
corr

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>>223396681

>>223396750
neoliberal w

>>223396753
Grow up

>>223396709
I don't believe you actually

>>223396753
>>223396690
>>223396645
Ah yes I'm sure you, a bunch of unlovable fuckless incels, know her mind better than she

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Any wake up every morning feeling sad man in?

>>223396709
just fucking shut up mate, please just shut the fuck up

not my fault that im a specky runtish incel, i went to an all boys school you see

>>223396753
fungal one...

>>223396801
Pingas :/

lovely weekend spent at the gfs house, back home now and can spend all sunday larping as an INCEL oh it great

fungus

>>223396746
Nah it's chewy and crap

Current Account: £13.5k
Fixed Rate Bonds: £10k
Stocks and Shares ISA: £29.6k
Cash ISA: £52k
Lifetime ISA: £15.5k
Premium Bonds: £1.5k
Pension: £20.5k

>>223396690
They settle because they were only good enough to be plowed by chad and not committed to by chad. If you think they aren't cheating on the side if they can, you are lying to yourself.

Also plenty of men settle with some hag they aren't attracted to because they aren't getting pussy anywhere else, or they just don't get any pussy at all. Feel sad for men before you feel sad for women.

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>>223396772
ZAMN

>>223396845
Shags: 0

>>223396845
wow thats mental *gives you your medicine and wheels you back into your room*

>>223396853
Oh just have sex you autistic freak

>>223396819
Had a long distance gf and it was great but towards the end of our visits I'd always be looking forward to going back to being a grim incelmong for a while

>>223396844
god forbid you should have to chew while eating a meal

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>They settle because they were only good enough to be plowed by chad and not committed to by chad. If you think they aren't cheating on the side if they can, you are lying to yourself.

>Also plenty of men settle with some hag they aren't attracted to because they aren't getting pussy anywhere else, or they just don't get any pussy at all. Feel sad for men before you feel sad for women.

>>223396819
>he doesn't live with his gf
>he doesn't know she's getting her pussy split while he's not here
giga-cucked

>>223396809
Aha me too couldn't talk to women for the first two years of uni and probably still can't now (even though I have a gf)

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Songs from the Big Chair

>>223396799
I’ve actually held hands before nigga, so watch your fucking mouth

>>223396911
who hurt you lad

How many men on here have we lost to the tranny suicide epidemic

only got 4 hours sleep and i was drinking last night but i feel alright today strangely
that would normally have me in bits

Vile umchicken

>>223396853
I feel sad for all of humanity. Everything is terrible.

literally shat my guts out last night, was on the toilet and did one big push and everything just poured out of me

>>223396881
its a good feeling getting home and going into incelmode isnt it, can just mong around for a while

ok todays my final day of eating shit and drinking beer tomorrow I’m a new man

>>223396936
a 1, 2, 3 4 5

[Verse 1: Ziedy]
If you see me posting down /ita/
Staring at the archive
And dragging my two feet
You just pass me by
It still makes me cry
But you can make me ERP again

[Verse 2: Ziedy]
And If you see me with another poster
I'm wanking and I'm trolling
Doing what I can
I won't put you down
'Cause want you around
You can make me ERP again

[Chorus: All]
Looking back on when we first met
I cannot escape and I cannot forget
Fungus, you're the one, you still turn me on
You can make me whole again

A lot of incel talk in today.

I don't know why simps get so mad when you talk about the reality of female sexuality. Does it get you pussy to be this performatively defensive? Maybe I should try it.

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Why does the first image when searching gay police have a UK flag? Explain bongs

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this is stupid I want to talk about VAGINAS

being a virgin with a cuckold fetish is the ultimate, i just look at society and think about all the women having sex while i never will then i wank so hard

>>223397003
a plague on every online community

hello yes i am grotty smelly incel im a FREAK a ghoulish sprite with no business in this world

>>223396845
actual spastic

>>223397024
you need to stop watching porn and start valuing yourself

if my cousin from my dad's side of the family married my cousin from my mum's side of the family, is that fucked up? like there would be 0 relation if my mum and dad never married.

might get a car

>>223397084
weird lie

>>223397084
no you won't

mad ting

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actually mental how much graham lineham posts on twitter hes at it all day every day just seething about trannies

>>223397077
It's kinda weird

had a dream that i met jynx maze and she turned out pulled her thong to the side and present her bumhole before which i proceeded to eat then i woke up just as i got a stiffu

ughhh im such an incel!

>>223397090
>>223397110
bizarre reaction

>>223397075
why

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>>223397116
transphobes not looking dysgenic challenge impossible mode

>>223397116
Hope they have huge loud nasty shits in there

These cunts deserve it, you opened pandoras box, deal with it

>>223397116
Well he's Irish isn't he they have to seethe about something

the lack of football on the telly is maddening july is a fucking ABHORRENT month

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Not even a bad deal

his infernal majesty

not being funny but I'd have shagged chinese gordon

>>223397116
hes got a nice big spacious empty head to inhabit rent free

>>223397162
why do you watch football

>>223397162
Scottish league starts next week somehow

>>223397116
look at the fucking guns on that cunt
built like a brick shithouse

>>223397116
It's not an offence for a man to enter a woman's bathroom, nor vice-versa.

got a british flag up in the incel flat like yanks do with their silly banner and both women that have come back to mine didnt like it. maybe if it was tastefully displayed they wouldnt mind, but its just slapped on the living room wall where the only other decoration is a sofa and an old tv. dont want to play away games every time i shag so it may be time to get rid of it

rorke leaving Birmingham in tears because the locals and muslims kept calling him gay

Great goalkeeping by Handanovic

>>223397198
do you not have any interests or hobbies

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>>223397207
just a tall woman rorke

>>223397218
Replace it with a Jamaican flag

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shithole

>>223397218
maybe you've got it upside down and they noticed

>>223397242
FIRE STYLE DEAD JOCK NO JUTSU

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How do (You) reheat takeaway pizza?

>>223397230
yeah I do
why do you watch football

>>223397242
will be some guff tarq leaving a fag end or having a bbq

eaten my roast beef sandwich and it was very nice
how do you cut your sandwich, rectangles or triangles?

Got one of those slushie makers and the frozen cocktails you can make from them are fucking lethal. The drinks are so sweet you don't even realise you're drinking alcohol

my cousin married someone who was born on the exact same day as me and was born in the same hospital. somewhat interesting that innit

>>223397273
it is an interest of mine and has been since i was a wee boy
what do you find interesting?

>>223397270
splash of water on the top then I fry it with air in the airfryer

>So, tell me about yourself... do you have any interests or hobbies?
>um yeah actually I watch wogs play football

>>223397270
always hear mongs put their already cooked pizza from the fridge at 200C for 15 like nibba that's how you cook a pizza from scratch you fucking spastic if you're just reheading 160C for 5 minutes is enough

>>223397270
I don't, love cold 'za me

My cousin married an American
Just thought you might like to know

>>223397240
insanely mouldy post

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>>223397270
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/T6G4dW_QNo8

>>223397303
what's interesting about it

>>223397326
need her executed for treason

>>223397326
A black american

>>223397303
my interests? Learning. Reading. Researching. Creating. Looking at the beauty life with a curious eye and trying to translate it into art.

>>223397310
trying to make watching football sound like a hobby for freaks
bizarre just really quite odd

>Me? Uh, well I like putting on The Office and going on my phone haha

>>223397340
i asked you a question

>>223397339
stroke victims be like

>>223397348
No he's white

Me? I kill women
;)

wtf i thought the white stripes were brother and sister but they were actually husband and wife who did the siblings thing as a bit

>>223397024
Think of facing any of the people in your life that you respect and you’ll sober up very quickly.

>>223397326
Pingas

>>223397340
playing football is fun and it's fun to watch people who are really good at it + you support a team and when they win you feel good

>>223397357
why

>>223397326
Cousin's husband's brother is married to a very fit mystery meat Californian and he lives there now, picked up the accent and everything

>>223397354
know a couple who do this every night. not even kidding, they have the office on repeat in the background since covid and they spend their evenings scrolling reddit and instagram

both on ssris btw and they wonder why they're depressed

>>223397374
they're both

>>223397125
they don't make pornstars like that anymore

>>223397394
zomgroids

>>223397383
>playing football is fun
what does that have to do with watching it
>and it's fun to watch people who are really good at it
why
>+ you support a team and when they win you feel good
why do you support a team

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and the etruscans
where are they now

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>>223397361
stroke haha

>>223397386
are you a virgin by any chance

>>223397354
that's literally on the same tier as watching football

>>223397425
get your mind out of the gutter

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first ever instance of "sex arse" being used this way on /brit/

I want to fuck a French woman so badly

>>223397374
seven nation army couldnt hold them back :P

can't find my Zulu DVD

careful lads we have a VERY cool man in here who looks down upon people who like football. hes above them you see.

>>223397418
>what does that have to do with watching it
that's connected to the second part of the sentence you actual spastic dribbling ape boy
>and it's fun to watch people who are really good at it
people enjoying watching people who are good at things they enjoy. people watch streamers play video games instead of just playing video games themselves
>why do you support a team
because it represents the place i'm from

>>223397430
no, you?

(directed towards no-one in particular) grow up for god's sake

football is a bit shit now

>>223397383
playing or especially watching sport is one of the most low IQ and low class things you can do. it makes me cringe when people at work talk about the football results every Monday like they're part of it

>>223397530
why don't you tell us what things you enjoy then

havent watched a film in 4 years which is kind of pathetic, used to enjoy watching a film me now i just watch youtube and tv like a weird little freak

Am 32 and probably getting engaged soon but still wank to the gf I had when I was 19.
Still have her nudes hehe.

any turn their life around man in?

>>223397562
trying my best
x

>playing sport is one of the most low IQ and low class things you can do
one of the gayest things a man could possibly say
the ancient greeks would have raped you on the spot for this

>>223397530
next time just say your dad was limp wristed wuss who didnt have the intelligence to enter you into team sports with other children which set you back and is a significant part of why you turned out the way you did

at the pub talking to bossman about this interracial lesbian jav I saw

>>223397561
Shut it cansmong

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>>223397442

>>223397559
same. during my 30s i lost interest in everything.

What's the best streaming service? Pengflix? HBO?

>>223397584
her fannois. I've seen it

>>223397475
>because it represents the place i'm from
how so

>>223397616
don't know

notice how the people who hate sports always go quiet when you ask them what hobbies they have

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they've landed on the planet and are entering the big beehive thing

>>223397561
hahaha same lad im always wanking over ex gfs even though im long since settled down with my gf. sometimes i like their instagram posts just to throw a bit of chaos out there

>>223397616
They're called torrents, imbecile.

>>223397614
just want to die in my sleep

>>223397642
Shit film and only getting worse with age

>>223396916
>>223396809
Ktimming hard at these posts
Went to an all boys grammar and genuinely had zero female interaction for several years, went to uni absolutely CLUELESS on how to talk to women it was grim
Still wouldn't have wanted to be in a mixed gender school

>>223397530
tarqs love sport

got the mahavishnu orchestra on

>>223397575
>>223397544
I bet you're one of them talking about it on Monday aren't you. I enjoy making you people show how thick you are

We were in our Monday meeting once and one of them started droning on about how he watched women's football like it was impressive

>you mean the football?
>huh?
>you said women's football. you can just call it the football because she that's what it is

>>223397242
did the guy here who lives in one of those buildings die in the fire
he posted the view of arthurs seat from the window a few times
rip

>>223397681
tell us what your hobbies are

played and watched football growing up but don't really see the point in supporting a team any more now that I'm grown up and know they're just brands owned by wogs and populated with wogs
mighy get back into playing but most people I know who still play get injured so not really worth it

>>223397658
squandered potential for sure but still the most ambitious attempt at a decent ancient aliens film

>>223397686
prefer not to say...(wanking)

>>223397163
Had a dream last night that I was driving a Ferrari then I see this post
Proper weird that

>>223397685
I moved out at the end of May
Hopefully the guy I let the room to is ok

>Watching football/enthusiastically supporting a team is low status
>Occasionally watching football/pretending to support a team is high status
>Playing Sunday League is low status
>Playing 5 a side is neutral
>Playing racket sports is high status
I grew up on a council estate and this is my opinion

Tesco pastas are so disgusting is it really that difficult to make pasta taste nice? Grim

>>223397662
Did you ever...you know?

>>223397681
cor i bet youre popular at work what a neek

I read on tiktok that you can just not pay your council tax and they can't do fuck all about it

>>223397695
ssri stare

>>223397717
5 a side squash is fun and high class

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>because she that's what it is

>>223397713
suspicious timing to move out like that
been to aviemore lately as well, i bet. expect a knock on the door

>>223397562
nah. just praying for the end now

right nap time now

>>223397717
>>Occasionally watching football/pretending to support a team is high status
Alri PR advisor to every politician

>>223397739
Flabbergasted bradley

>>223397717
You're correct

what's that thing heathergenius used to say about the irish having an affinity for brown people because of haemochromatosis? did he ever expand on why the iron affects them that way?

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>>223397751
aviemore mentioned

>>223397725
that's a workplace 9

>>223397765
nap tight
x

>>223397739
I'm on my phone on the bus and the screen is small a d moving, thicko

playing table tennis is chinese

I've been thinking about buying one of those tenement buildings in the ghetto but I'm always scared of renters on the American dole(section 8)

I support the local team if it looks like they're about to win something

>>223397584
i want to be her slave

why dont you take up boxing or mma or muay thai. there is no discrimination for autistic freaks and in some cases it actually helps to be that way. if you dont want to get hit in the face how about judo or brazilian jiu jitzu. gain confidence and a healthy body. get the endorphins from being overpowered by another man or perhaps vanquishing him yourself. gain a clue.

>>223397814
vile incel

serena mello, alysa liu, moo deng, just don't hear about them any more

>>223397828
Violence is for people who have lost the argument.

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Ok I will eat it!!

>>223397792
Beautiful

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>>223397804

gf is sending me stupid skit tiktoks again

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I'd still have sex with Alyssa Liu.

>>223397876
mate sends me videos links all the time, wonder if he knows I never watch them

>>223397828
these are sports you do as a yute then drop as as an unc

want to start my reading books arc

>>223397792
gorgeous place
got engaged when there and it was all snowy

>>223397662
its not right. interacted with them in nursery and then was immediately ripped away from the opposite gender until uni, and by then i was basically a vegetable. should be able to sue my parents for child abuse

>>223397870
How the fuck are you supposed to tell what the box will contain? Is it the pastry, the beer or the pot of sauce?

>>223397924
I'm happy with either

Hate when you watch a tiktok and then a few weeks later you see the exact same tiktok copied word for word by some other gimp
Cringe my nut off

i couldnt imagine having a gf. one who leans in and takes photos of you with the front facing camera all the time. one who takes photographs of you with your plate of food or you staring gormless into your pint. one who gets a photo taken standing with you wherever you go together.

>>223397870
>Does not contain alcohol
Wack!

>>223397924
think it contains smaller versions of the big orange thing in the middle of the box

>>223397870
CHEEEEEEZ IT’THS
CHEEEEEEZ IT’THS

>>223397870
>enlarged to show detail
so they're not the size of a mountain range, then?

got al jarreau on

>>223397944
most of them dont do that shit

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Viewing the lust-provoking images again

with incels interlinked
with incels interlinked
with incels interlinked
with incels interlinked
with incels interlinked

>>223396809
>>223396916
>>223397662
>>223397920
If you go to an all boys school you're supposed to have bum fun with one of the cute lads with fluffy hair and fuck-me eyes. Then at least you aren't a virgin freak upon leaving. Imagine missing out on pounding those lovely bums, utterly fumbled.

Oi Cody wanker, do you have a licence to walk in the middle of the road with an open container? Jaywalking prick

@223397988
nobody cares incel

>>223397988
stop doing that

Oddest thing you've ever wanked to?
For me it was a Baldur's Gate 3 character.
Wasn't even rule 34.

>>223397983
bizarre post

27 now and feel old

might start acting like a FOB bame
littering, stealing from the white man, going to food banks even though ive got a job
at this point its just evening the playing field

>>223397992
right then, glad stephen fry could join us tonight

>>223397992
think you might just be bent lad

>>223397992
Only the rugby lads bummed each other

>>223398015
myself in the mirror, literally

>>223398025
28 and yeah I'm feeling old. Used to be on the cutting edge of culture. Now it comes and goes quicker than I can pay attention. The world is passing me by so it is.

heem all women

>>223398015
your mum

anyone see big poz load last night

>>223398025
this but 22

just before we entered secondary school one moved to an all boys school and we referred to it as the bent school

>>223397913
bet he loved that haha x

Not gay but if I'd gone to a boys school I'd definitely have given it ago
Would be hard not to really wouldn't it

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>when you're trying not to fall into the gay trap at the all boys school and the diminutive lad with the bieber cut and the pretty eyes looks at you like this

>>223398088
when in rome

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>>223397989
>Peng.
Peng.
>Have you ever been in a highschool? Peng.
Peng
>Do they keep you in cell? Peng.
Peng
>When you're not performing your duties do they keep you in a smelly bedroom? Peng.
Peng.
>Poo.
Poo.
>What's it like to hold the hand of someone you love? Poo.
Poo.
>Did they teach you wipe paper to arse? Poo.
Poo.
>Do you long for scranning a poo? Poo
Poo.
>Do you dream about doing a poo...
>Poo.
>What's it like to discover a poo in your arse? Poo.
Poo.
>Do you feel that there's a part of you that's missing? Poo.
Poo.
>Gay porn poo peng.
Gay porn poo peng.
>Why don't you say that three times: Gay porn poo peng.
Gay porn poo peng gay porn poo peng gay porn poo peng.
>We're done... Agent Rorke, you can pick up your bonus.

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the amir show

>>223398025
over 25 is old

>>223398044
nice well developed glutes I bet they had, corrr

>>223398106
s

>>223398094
VERY cute lad

was at a party in sixth form and the host invited the androgynous thing. he sat on my lap for a good part of the night even though i was fully erect the whole time. never spoke to him after that and none of my mates ever brought up my brief foray into the jungle of gay desire

wasnt that amir bloke taking 5 wickets when he was like 14 at the oval or something, career got fucked and was led astray
what could have been

>>223397992
In reality I was blue balled for five years and constantly fantasised about shagging all my female teachers

woke up at 2pm award

>>223398129
Not so cute now (s)he's actually larping as a real lad doey

>>223398159
no healthy that

sore as hell from mowing the lawn yesterday

got no crackers
got no brie
been reduced to a banana and wasabi peas like a cheeseless husk of a man