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mika

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Ha ha .. Yep .. He's a funny bloke .. Whatever next .. 10p Freddos Lol ..

I'm the smartest person on Earth (and I can't prove it)

got all the lights on
got the PS4 on
got the phone charging
got the appliances all running
just not gonna pay the bill am i

it would be funny if Farage lost to him though

>>223423425
I like trains ok
>>223423451
He looks old ok
>>223423480
I don't get it ok

>>223423497
haha what a silly sausage!

>>223423497
James O'Brien crying with laughter

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Watching you cunts work is a miracle

THREE monster raving loony party candidates? Jeremy you're insane

>>223423497
white people love this shit.
makes them laugh their rainbow coloured socks off

Uh, who are you talking to?

>>223423497
/r/UK bait, anti-comedy

Friendly reminder that anime is for nonces.

I'm a clown in clowntown clowning around

>>223423587
Don't be friendly about it next time

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never understood the “she’s only 18 you sick fuck” shit until my buddy decided to sleep with this ftm man (literally 10 years younger than him) this weekend

Unfriendly reminder that anime is for nonces

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>>223423486
diffed

>>223423497
Diego abstaining upon seeing #19

https://youtu.be/NNv2RHR62Rs

wait a minute this isn't /brit/

>>223423623
sounds like haken :)

He's a bad man! He's a bad man!

Sneak into his room and report back!

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1. Were you a class clown in school?
2. Did you enjoy being a class clown?
3. Do you think it has affected your life after school?

Generate an image of a woman a heart-shaped or oval face. High, thin, and well-defined eyebrows arched above the eyes, which were often accentuated with soft eyeshadow and long lashes. The nose tended to be straight and delicate, while lips were shaped into a defined cupid’s bow—usually painted with rich, glamorous lipstick. The overall effect was symmetrical, polished, and sophisticated. Imagine her with soft finger waves, perfectly framing her heart-shaped face, the glossy S-curves catching the light. She’s wearing a floor-length gown, bias-cut to skim her figure. The dress is draped in shimmering sequins—light reflecting with every move. The neckline is likely draped or cut on a slight bias, perhaps with delicate cap sleeves. She stands with that effortless elegance, sequins glinting, as if she’s just stepped into the golden age of cinema.

scranning a golden coontime

https://youtu.be/hKrAPSootn4

You cunts are living proof that I don't have to think for myself

>>223423636
um yes it is

>>223423657
>Were you a class clown in school?
kind of but in hindsight i was just annoying
>Did you enjoy being a class clown?
yeah it was class
>Do you think it has affected your life after school?
yeah i’m the most unaccomplished male in my graduating class

wasted the day so far award

>>223423497
bro just woke up and still thinks it's 2013

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Something's going to happen, isn't it

>>223423497
>Bin HQ, in Weeley
scream

I'm mentally ill, catch me if you can!

>>223423657
Until I was around 15 yeah, for attention (as I was neglected at home).

Then when I turned 15 I had a realisation that what I was doing was extremely cringey and distracting people who wanted to learn. From the until the end of secondary school I retreated into my shell and pretty much said nothing to anyone. I left with entry-to-medicine tier grades, not that it mattered as I later dropped out of uni and now I earn 13 pounds an hour.

>>223423657
>1. Were you a class clown in school?
Yh I was an autistic spaz freak lol
>2. Did you enjoy being a class clown?
Yh I got a lot of attention and was probably the most "popular" kid in the whole school almost everyone knew my name just because of how notoriously retarded I behaved ahah
>3. Do you think it has affected your life after school?
Yh I've got main character syndrome I don't like being in a group where I'm not the main one getting reactions and laughs

>>223423715
*grabs you by your trousers and accidentally pulls them off as you try to run*

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This isn't fair, I read your posts

>>223423657
yeah until puberty hit and i got really bad acne which tanked my confidence
no
yeah, i'm a worthless incel now working a deadend job

>>223423698
sup mouldie

clarissa is a novel in which a young woman decides not to marry the man her parents chose for her and instead run away with another man who rapes her and then she dies which is quite black pilled really isn't it

I've been played

This is impossible!

being the most recognised poster on /brit/ is like being the most recognisable person in a cafe in durham town centre on a saturday afternoon. theres barely anyone there little bro it makes no impact on the world

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have to wait four years for more 'CAM ON INGLUND' posting, feels bad lads

>>223423425
public transport is cool

Uh, actually I'm not mad

Also, you're a bad man!

>>223423805
Not attractive

>>223423805
shes gone all chinese

Truth is a colicking horse that serves no purpose!

I just saw the fittest latin american mom walking outside. Will have a wank to her. Trying not to forget her face

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>>223423497
>nationalizing adele
PFfffffhhahhahahahahhah BASEDBASED BASED

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>>223423805

https://youtu.be/xXlmJtk1VQs

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thinking about super hans' mute peng asian ting

>>223423832
Is he irish,Michael Fastbender?

Having a panic attack

Yes mate, talking to yourself is a sign of madness

Crack on

~ turning japanese I think I'm turning japanese I really think so

back in the day you used to have songs about scrunching up your face so much while ejaculating that it made you look like a little japanese man. You couldn't have that these days could you yeah wouldn't be allowed due to the woke you understand yep the wokes won't allow it

forced to consume food again fuck my fauna life

Where do I get a devout Catholic girlfriend? I am by no means worthy or better, but if you find these people online the first image is always ass out, which is not particularly what you want.

>>223423862
church

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>mum complains that i'm gaining weight
>told her i won't eat any more today since i hit my calories
>she gets angry at me and proceeds to force feed me
i can't wait to move out. fuck this chudcel shit

i genuinely do not believe that half of you are real. i can imagine how a poster in /cum/ or /mex/ or /fra/ looks but i cannot believe the average /brit/ poster is real

racoon girl sloppy top

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>>223423836
she's high as fuck

You've run out of ideas

This is sad

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>>223423857
You could if it was created in Japan.

By all means, fuck with me

If you dare

>>223423679
>yeah i’m the most unaccomplished male in my graduating class
mad because i'm the most accomplished whilst being the biggest freak in school
the 'tism worked out for me in the end

love japan and japanese ppl so much

Dancing away my problems. It's what Diego would've wanted.

>>223423881
i do this all the time but im usually not high i just dont know how to stay 'normal' and need to keep adjusting

>>223423722
why didn't you do medicine

>>223423899
you got the good kind of autism

>>223423913
lol hwo do yu know

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>>223423849
how the fuck would i know

was walking back from my lunch and saw 2 women walking in front of me wearing tight trousers with their arses jiggling
I'm going to go insane from the frustration

Where is Lenin?

read about the rape of nanjing and Unit 731 when I was bored in high school and I could never see the Japanese the same way again. They're deeply evil.

>>223423875
I look like the Anglo Saxon phenotype image.

>>223423754
why would you need good looks and confidence to be a class clown
if anything those would make you more of a clown
I was an ugly spotty insecure freak and I was a massive spastic lol

>>223423927
Red Square

dont trust anyone who owns cats

horrid little creatures

Right time to fuck off and restrategize

I'll be on redscarepod

the differentiator between millennials and gen z i their opinion on the Star War prequels

>>223423955
Wish the Ukranians would hurry up and blow up Lenin's mausoleum. The seethe would be biblical

>>223423955
Is he now

>>223423979
yeah

>>223423754
Maybe I am wrong, but this all comes down to how much you care. Never once cared about spots and never washed my face but my brother was obsessed with it until he stopped washing and it went away. I am not saying that will happen to you, but this is a universal law. It's like how guys who are obsessed with cars somehow always have something breakdown while moms in a 20 year old car never have a single issue. Hell, I'm even handsome and never speak to women.

>>223423987
Thought he was in Germany

>>223423916
Never interested me particularly. Also it was my perception at the time that the people who got in to study medicine were a cut above me. Not academically but at least at the school I went to all the medicine applicants had been primed, largely by their parents many of whom were doctors themselves, to be ideal applicants.

For them it wasn't just academics it was: playing an instrument to a high standard, speaking another language to a good standard, excelling in athletics, being very social and charming etc. I had none of that, was just pretty clever.

package is at Midlands Super Hub and it's on its way :)

>>223424000
no

>>223424007
What did you buy? Me? Kratom addict.

Don't fucking ring me you spastic, I'm busy

>>223423657
yes but because of autism and when I started getting teased and bullied for it in secondary school I retreated into a shell and never came back out

can you all shut up, I'm trying to get some sleep here

Oh dear, we've fucked up with this one

>>223423997
it did go away. i have clear skin and don't even have any acne scars but the damage was done

>>223424025
please answer. i just want to talk. please just give me five minutes of your time

>>223424024
prefer not to say

https://youtu.be/VeFMdVIFsgs

Mentally sane people talk to themselves don't they

the lunch?
beans, waffles, a fried egg, a clue gained

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right so it's almost August, summer is moving fast

worst/most embarrassing thing youve ever done in a breakup?

for me:
>called her tens of times leaving voicemails begging and pleading for her to come back, sent her emails filled with gay poetry and short stories, and wrote a song about her

>>223424102
rorkes gone vegetarian

Since a man can’t make one
He has not right to tell a woman when and where to create one

This is no longer funny

Why did I do this

>>223424102
just one egg? why not two?

>>223424119
told her I had never been in love with her and was just pretending the entire time

haha you guys are all hava

>>223424119
wow Cody that's nuts, I'll let you know when I have one

>>223424144
bloody bastard

something ive noticed:

>true chuds: aussies
>quasi-chuds: americans
>neutral: kiwis
>quasi-libtards: brits
>true libtards: canadians

>>223424144
what is hava

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>>223424108
Need summer done with pronto. It's time for autumn. It's time for a cool breeze and crispy leaves. It's time for layering.

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>>223424171
they ate the tomate

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>>223424166
hava good day

haha gotcha

Where is Lenin?

It pie night

I hate AI but it just makes everything so much easier now. If I Google something to find an answer then it'll be on a page or Reddit thread or something in the middle of a giant essay. But if I ask ChatGPT it hands the literal answer to me with the sources (so I can check if I think it's mistaken). It basically just gives me the answer instantly. I fucking hate it

>>223424138
did you mean it or was it just a spiteful larp?
if it wasn’t sincere yeah that sucks

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not filling me with confidence like

What's a paper bag?

>>223424193
lenin on deez nuts

>>223424191
thank you :)

rorkeing all over the world

>>223424156
my name is ryan

Going to Bali later this year. Reckon that if I leave without porking a hot European chick that'll really mean I'm destined to be a wizard, KV spec

>>223424233
hi mate

https://youtu.be/HsM_VmN6ytk

>>223424239
With your mates?

>>223424206
spiteful larp

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>>223424243
hello dude!!!!

has anyome seen my ligma

Solo trip to Thailand methinks

>>223424255
smells of dust and old people this

>>223424277
um

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sc

gfstein just sent a video of her slapping her big pale ass in the bathroom. brb

>>223424257
Yeah but my sole goal is to ditch them and end up chatting up a hot Swedish/German/British chick in a seedy bar and getting an STD

>>223424275
afraid not mate :(

>>223424277
erm

Yes mate, post CSAM that'll solve everything

Something something glasshouse

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Big change at 12-13

about to embark on a trek to the goon cave

>>223424277
make sure to drink from the buckets on Phuket beach
the bleach taste is just from them washing them out

right well he's started nonceposting again

>>223424297
oh ok

>>223424313
yeah she got braces

>>223424275
what is that?

I need to lie

I need to lie!

>don't flirt with women at work
>don't flirt with women at your hobbies
>don't flirt with women at the bar
where should I flirt with women then??? hmm?????

>>223424132
nigga do you know what lunch is
it's supposed to be LIGHT

>Nearside Front Suspension arm ball joint excessively worn (5.3.4 (a) (i))
Would u still buy a car if it recently failed MOT for this

i look fucking nuts much crazier than i actually am

smells of seaside here and is cold and dreary :3

>>223424119
honestly brilliant
shouldve asked her for money as well to solidify the chances of her never ever claiming you raped her because it would be embarrassing for her, ironclad ex-defense

Some of you are paid to diagnose people

It's a miracle

>>223424327
found it doesn't matter

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>>223424285

>>223424331
Bali.

rorke making a funny joke about hillsboro

What did one clown say to the other

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What's fascinating about the Carl Gustaf is it has no recoil. For some reason this causes more ear and head trauma to the operator. Learned it on /k/

i mostly talk about my gf to upset the incels.
i hate incels you see and i wish them to suffer enormously

>>223424361
that is me

>>223424382
yeah indians care a lot about carl gustavs and Mlaws theyre big wargamers

>>223424337
If it failed the MOT for that then it will have had that fixed in order to pass and be roadworthy.

Yes, none of you should have started this should you

Until next time (sooner?)

>>223424384
but im one of the good ones youre pwning me with collateral damage stop that at once

>>223424397
Yeah no it was fixed

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>>223424384
spend a day in our shoes, we only want to be treated like people, it not right

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What do you reckon Jurgen Klopp's knob looks like?
I've always thought he looks the type to have one of those thick, long ones that droop down at the end like a tree branch weighed down by fruit

>>223424428
good question, I'll email him now

>>223424428
not long but girthy with a big bellend

>>223424415
So you've answered your own question.

>>223424428
i'll let you know after hes done raping my arse later

>>223424451
we don't sign our posts here

>>223424457
don’t think u understood what I meant

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Didn't sunbathe enough this year me
Didn't build up my vitamin D reserves for the winter

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And I will just say hello to the folks that you know

>>223424428
it is pure enamel white, just like his fake teeth.

bennies secured
time to get the scran in

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dont look at me

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never had eggs benedict before
is it nice?

>>223424494
Thought benefits come on Fridays

>>223424512
I was on the bevs all weekend

Right lads we need to defeat this cunt

Ideas?

>>223424509
only women have eggs benedict, usually at brunch (a woman thing)

>Andy Burnham has been accused of planning an £18billion 'death tax' to pay for social care reforms as fears grow about how the Prime Minister will fund his plans.
Now we have to pay to die!!!!

>>223424525
Who, Andy Burnham?

>>223424505
dont believe in souls but if i did id be like most mammals have got souls but not these things

>>223424509
It is divine, I highly recommend it, especially with a nice mimosa and a side of fruit.


Simply scrumptious!

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>>223424538
Guido

>>223424536
death and taxes innit

gf staying over tonight, cuddles very much on the menu

>>223424208
dogberg when i am late taking him for his walk

>>223424563
gonna shag her up the arse?

Right so that's excel randomly freezing when trying to save a file that is only on my hard drive making my laptop completely unusable for 5 - 10 minutes

Mental how good Windows 11 is

>>223424563
can i come too

I don't get it, that's not funny

>>223424556
whatever happened to the uggz trend
sweaty sweaty feet

>Sydney Sweeney anchors this erotic thriller

based prime video recommending me what i want

>>223424563
tell him hi

What would the NHS collapsing actually look like

https://youtu.be/LfyxQecu5WI

Mad how incel just means what nerd meant 30 years ago.

andy burnham looks like the kind of dweeb that me and the gang would bully in high school, a real pathetic nerd

>>223424587
what you want is to have a wank so just look up her being butterfaced yet topless and have a wank instead

Strange how the media is trying to promote transgender people as much as possible yet it’s always young, semi attractive trans women?

There are ugly gay men in Hollywood so why not the same for trannys? Where’s the 50 year old chain smoker tranny with the blue wig

have to install it on my machine to learn about it in order to get a job as an "IT nigga" but I don't want to do it, it'll be so crap

>>223424604
Wouldn't you like to know

>>223424633
meant to respond to >>223424572

Oh, that game I thought I was playing...

This century belongs to BRAPS countries

>>223424614
incel is far more heinous than a simple nerds. simple nerds are usually able to have a life. an incel is the absolute worst of them, someone people are disgusted by via natural instinct and its universal too. like a vile mass of all the wrong evolutionary traits and the worst genes humanity has to offer. incels are highly offensive to the rest of humanity simply by existing

Once Andy Burnham steps down, Shabana Mahmood will finally become PM and fulfill England's destiny of being ruled by Indians

Where is Lenin?

Someone say please

>>223424644
Just get a cheap hard drive and dual boot

>>223424619
reckon he'd karate-kick you and your mates into the stratosphere

It winds me up how much of a joke we are in the UK when it comes to politics due to “tradition”

Letting posh spastic politicians sit and argue in commons with their little posh quips and letting retards like “count bin face” or “Mr roboto” stand for election and get to stand on the stage and make a mockery of our system even if they get 50 votes

I’d love to eee one of those towns vote one of the meme candidates and then watch their little shit hole fall apart when the crackhead in the costume doesn’t know what to do

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>>223424587
>based trad chud
>every acting role is her being a whore

oh my days

>>223424670
that would never happen
we will never have an indian PM
rorke would put a stop to that

>>223424664
looks like messi

All's Well That Ends Well

Charli xcx - brap

knock knock

who's there?

Lenin

Lenin who?

Please Lenin

no I won't let you in I don't know you

>>223424681
I would get that faggot in a headlock quicker than tom brady scores a touchdown

>>223424699
lol vrey good

>>223424689
looks like jurgen klopp's knob if I am to be believed

>>223424664
leftypol b liek: Trump when deciding what tarrifs to place !!!!!

>>223423497
Yeah hilarious mate

>>223424664
trade you our racoons for your badgers

cocky little freaks

>>223424731
sort of the point of the post but it took you an hour to miss what everyone else gleamed immediately

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Did you prefer the Lolita actress in the 1997 or 1962 film. Both were 14-15 iirc

>>223423497
Richards and Adrians love this shite

>>223424739
never met a badger

>>223424739
it's all the same shite innit

my collars blue but ma neck is red
Been working like a dog just to keep ma family fed

>>223424748
loooool slow autist OWNED

I'm positively cock-a-hoop

>>223424764
>>223424748
cringe

right well that's an afternoon of doing fuck all

>>223424689
ziedy and heathermong?

>>223424791
it's okay to be cringing, I would be too if i was you

I know where Lenin is

>>223424804
Excellent book!

Gf said something hurtful to me today

We met for lunch and walked past a tattooed goth lady who looked at me and looked away and I kinda smirked to myself and my gf said “you really need to stop thinking you are good looking enough for women to check you out, you aren’t in that category sorry”

Stupid rude cunt who’s dad is an alcoholic

>>223424751
haven't seen either x

>>223424804
fucking hate this type of book
just boring quasi-autistic bollocks for people called Ian and Lindsey

>>223424835
cheat on her with that goth

Off to see my in-laws this Thursday

Hope all goes well

Diego drinks a book a day
Cleverest bloke I know

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Chuds after Aryanolan won at the box office with The Odyssey

Btw Nolan is Danish and not British

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>>223424835
yeah?

poo nigger scream

>>223424854
this but LITERALLY

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funniest shit I've ever seen

>>223424854
Imagine what he could do sober

I wish I could wake go home and be praised once you know? Or told I am doing a good job

Forsen's live

What's at the end of a joke

A drop

>>223424890
ur well weird mate do u save every half interesting post you see on 4chan or summat? u need a get a life tablet asap

Why am I looking up?

Mental how you can cut the tension with a knife when you go into a major city, the Whites, Those on the right those on the left, the immigrants. All ready to go at eachothers throats.

Civil war must be coming soon