New goal gf edition
new thread
Poo containment breach
horrific editionboring yankified crapFUCK OFF
Love the wide eyed stare catberg gives me when I shove my cock in his gob
might read moby dick
dad and sister came round yesterday and my cat hissed at her but gave my dad a cuddleshes very perceptive my cat she knows a wrongun when she sees one
rorke on that jacksfit rizz
do you ever stop and just really appreciate garlic
>look bro its just how i felt me minds mental the voices told me to kill me children so it did>walk us through what your mind told you>noah yes
Delicious runtmeal
>>224474203Looks nic
>>224474201i appreciate garlic on the go
Why do guys keep using 4chan after your government decreed it should not be servicing British IPs?You all want to be americans that badly?
>>224474202the judge be like well thats me convinced. not guilty!
>>224474174She has already admitted she killed them. She's presenting to the court the reason behind why she did it, that she lost control, so yes she needs to prove how she lost control and it needs to at least make sense
Another wedding todayThey're never ending
I would rather kill myself than use an british website
survived a major car crash a few months ago but my life has been so shit since then i'm half convinced i actually died and have gone to hell
off for my nap soon
nth for the baddiedem
???
>>224474243She's honestly not that fit and that's not just me being an epic contrarianThe only reason people find her attractive is because she dresses like a Barbie doll and alludes to enjoying being fuckedStrip off the makeup, bleached hair and skimpy dress and she's an average skinny fat munter with no tits or arse
29 Fenuary
>>224474245given that all* the jurors agreed that the prosecution had failed to prove beyond reasonable doubt that she was lying clearly the defence presented a much better argument
>>224474284michaol owens greatest moment
>>224474275>May I ask why>noShe answered your question dude. Are you retarded?
>>224474275Should have called her
>>224474281you're right she looks like fucking hillary clinton but rarely it's the sexy bitches with the talent rightmaybe lauren mayberry
>>224474281>Strip off the makeup, bleached hair and skimpy dress and she's an average skinny fat munter with no tits or arseAlmost all women in this country
>>224472577vghhh….my New England cousin :)
going to make a VERY onioney curry tomorrow
>>224474281Jealous much?
>>224474302No is not a full sentence because you need a subject and a predicate
Falklands should go to Penguins
I'm afraid I don't quite follow
>>224474320tbf they look butters even with all that
>>224474330if garlic wards off vampires then onions ward off africans
>>224474330imagine the smell
Lmao what? i dont remember a single day from hs.
clankers can't into blinking
>>224474330your breath is gonna smell like absolute shit
>>224474291>you can't prove "beyond reasonable doubt" my imaginary and invisible "illness" that I can make up stories about and write and re-write and edit at will is fake, hmmm yes very convenient. Except reasonable doubt is predicated on the nature of the circumstances, and since this is all in the mind of a foid, a team of doctors and therapists have all said at trial that this illness didnt exist in her
quite enjoy the term hunky dorygoing to find opportunities to use it this week
>>224474320almost all women* FTFY
>>224474401the married doctor she was riding topped himself after he lost his job in the fallout following her trialshe's still killing even from behind bars
>>224474378hang one around your neck and report back
>>224474275But reddit told me no is a complete sentence :(
perusing r/Age_30_plus-Gamers
>>224474444quimps
>>224474453im a 30+ gamer
>>224474461gesundheit
Be. The. Provider.
>>224474337Of what exactly? I'm not a tranny so why would I be jealous of how a woman looks
>>224474349I can't tell if you're retarded, trolling, or an Indian that just learned English and thinks they're an expert now.
>>224474476why do zoomer men devolve into speaking like hip hop rappers when they're talking to women? fucking embarrassing
Sir Crna Gora
Protect our women and children
>>224474476Reposted a screenshot from Reddit award
>>224474523your man in the glasses gagging for a knock on his door
>>224474523this looks like it could be an ari aster movie
>>224474529dont think they give out awards for that
>>224474529Has no sex award
>>224474523She had an abortion and this is how the church is helping her reclaim her place in heaven. Where eternal stagnation is much preferable to eternal torture.
>>224474523should just put all politics mongs in a big colloseum and leave us nimbys in peace
don't really like how the internet is getting more and more mentally ill as more "normal" people use itimplies something really sinister
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8IgdL7tszS0
right well that's silo s3 done
child
>>224474570Yeah have you seen comments on instagram? They are worse than anything you see on 4chan.
>>224474476I mean you offered to buy her a meal. She's a big girl, she should be able to handle her own problems, and if she's really desperate I'm sure her family or friends to float her $40. Why ask a stranger for that much? Who does that?
>>224474523Why are boomers so vicious in every aspect of life?
>>224472577>New goal gfisn't that goal boyfriend?
perhaps i'll watch some television this afternoon
>>224474571no chicken fights
>>224474570mental that you hear normal people saying /pol/ stuff that would have been relegated to online incel hangouts 15 years ago
>>224474570Normies have been on the internet for 15 years, buddy
Finally leaving my incel hovel and demoralisation machine by going outside just to shuffle around my incel town and be demoralised irl
>>224474615bizarre image
>>224474620scre this is me
>>224474620justin ktimberlake
>>224474620the 'mass?
>>224474615very regrettable tattoo
>>224474635…yh
stayed up all night boozing again awardfeeling like death awardcan only communicate in memes because I hate myself and the choices I make award
>>224472577She should fry on an electric chair, dance on the end of a rope, or put in a gas chamber. at the very least given lethal injection. she isnt even worthy of the dignity off the firing squad. but America has turned into a pathetic nation of cowards, pussys, faggots.
bruvs replying to OP
>>224474592Those words are interchangeable now adays, my guy
>>224474620ktimothy james byrne
>>224472577I live in Massachusetts the worst part about all this is my cousin is friends with her husband on Facebook because they used to go to the same highschool. This lady used to constantly threaten to kys every other week and refused to work
>>224474201wild garlic is a lovely smell but its a Spring plant.
>>224474646>hate yourselfyou probably should
>>224474646>stayed up all night boozing again awardit's a global feel
>>224474670i dont think that is the worst part about all this
>>224474670I personally think the worst part is 3 small children being murdered
>>224474506It's females tooIt's weirdIt's mostly 20-28 year olds I thinkThey only do this through text. I think it's them thinking negros are now 'cool to emulate' like hjow wigger kids did it in the 2000s
>>224474523Leftists aren't human
>>224474703all children are small
>>224474670Maybe they really wanted to off themself?
>>224474703
I was a big child when I was growing up :)
the worst part is the hypocrisy i say
>>224474646SOMEONE HAD THE BIG CANS, LAD
>>224474281I suspect her 'hair' is a wig.
>>224474670i think the worst part is the murdered children actually
around 13 they develop that smell
bostonmong's only gone and doxxed himself hasn't he
what ever happened to cokelad? is he in prison again?
A set of bodyweight pull-ups will make you weaker at subsequent weighted pull-up sets But if you reverse it, a set or two of weighted pull-ups won't lower a subsequent number of bodyweight reps And I can't really explain why
https://www.abc.net.au/news/2026-09-05/children-in-hospital-jumping-castle-lifts-off-birthday-party/107120370why does this keep happening
could I have a quick word?
Was on the bus earlier and it stopped in the middle of the road so I looked out the window and there was a fat black spastic just staring gormlessly into the window with its mouth agapeHad to look away sharpish so I didn’t burst out laughing.I need to grow up badly
>>224474767bus spotting was he?
>the indonesian government is burning down the junglewhy, did the orangutans and tigers offend allah? lmao
Nottingham Forest XI: Sels; Jair Cunha, Milenkovic, Murillo; Aina, McAtee, Schlager, Williams; Gibbs-White, Ndoye; Delap. Tottenham XI: Kinsky; Porro, Van Hecke, Van de Ven, Udogie; Tonali, Bentancur; Savio, Gallagher, Tel; Marmoush.
I was dying for a poo and then I did a poo and heaven knows I'm miserable now
>>224474782Not sure. He was like fully down syndrome. Seems like their sort of hobby
>>224474788muslims hate nature
how it feels to be respectful towards women
>>224474767caught your reflection in the window?
ok so dominos pizza for tea
>>224474765f scri
If this had been a Just Stop Oil protest the police would have been all over this. Not only would hundreds have been dragged away by now but the police would definitely have known about this in advance The Home Office has serious questions to answer
>>224474765>In December 2021, six children died and three others were seriously injured after a freak wind lifted a jumping castle into the air at a primary school in Devonport, Tasmania.
>>224474476screaming how shameless people arebruh can this stranger give me money for a FUCKING PIERCINGnot even FOODa PIERCINGlmao
>>224474790don't know football so I don't know any of these names
>>224474384I only remember it for the bad times, which is a shame because I did have good times as well and I was popular though I never fixed to a certain clique and would hang with anyone and everyone.
>>224474799Go be miserable somewhere else
>>224474812grow up
sometimes i have a wank when i'm not even horny just as a brief reprieve from the agony of my life
mental how much better I look when clean shaven but I can rarely be arsed
>>2244747902-1 forest
devon mentioned
>>224474816>peoplewomen who will just find another real man to provide if you can't, incel
>>224474814Do you just spend all day trawling twitter so you can copy and paste terrible posts here in hopes you bait a few rorkes
>>224474836just say "sometimes i have a wank"it's cleaner
>>224474476great play there from purple, didn't fall for the bait but responded in a dignified self-respecting manner
>>224474848men giving random whores money is literally how the wives no longer are provided for lmao
>>224474766prickthere's a word
>>224474811..yh
just sent a mass DM to everyone on Earth to tell them all to grow up
Man City XI: Donnarumma; Khusanov, Dias, Guehi, Gvardiol; Anderson, O'Reilly; Semenyo, Cherki, Ndiaye; Haaland. Coventry XI: Rushworth; van Ewijk, Amenda, Thomas, Pinnock, Dasilva; Onyeka, Grimes; Rudoni, Mason-Clark; Awoniyi.
>>224474816>strangerMy boyfriend of five years was the only person who i ever asked to get me a piercing. I think that kind of stuff is pretty intimate, actually.
>>224474883i didnt get one
*phone blares with emergency siren*MESSAGE FROM GOVERNMENT: GROW UP
Brighton XI: Verbruggen; Kadioglu, Vuskovic, Dunk, Boscagli; Ayari, Gross; Gomez, Yalcoure, De Cuyper; Kostoulas. Leeds XI: Trafford; Elvedi, Muharemovic, Justin; Bogle, Ampadu, Stach, Gudmundsson; Okafor, Tanaka; Calvert-Lewin.
>mumberg goes outside>I got you a roll from the delIt's literally a fucking plain bread rollRight then
>>224474722Annoying unfunny hypocritical man. Wkuk sam in the bag skit, is better than his entire sad career.
>>224474848Not usually? Unless they are just after posessions. Will women want snuggles, movies time, making dinner together and soft, sweet kisses.
>>224474877screwm
>>224474909my dad always brings bread when he comes round my gaff its greatlove bread me
>>224474564im a nimby but your use of the acronym seems questionable in the context of the post.
>>224474909Should have pumped her last night
*hovers over the flag*MOUNT WHAT!?
>>224474895THANK GOD. Someone had to say it.
back from gymtoil lads. what's the good word?
You know I shit talk you guys a lot but I'm sure the average British person is fine. I'm sure that goes for most groups. Why can't we all get along?
just picked up an inflatable castle with children inside and threw it up into the stratosphere at 78387578925mph
imagine buying dominoes loldire
>>224474932bread wanker loves his bread
>>224474932ngmi carb loading breadhead
>>224474962you a pizza hut man?
>>224474245everyone who kills their kids has lost control. People do drugs and lose their temper. Get drunk and lose their temper. They're all in prison
>>224474893a gay relationship is different
helen of troy sex arse
your honour, i was going a wee bit crazy and then lost italright ive heard enough, NOT GUILTY!
>>224474958>Why can't we all get alongBeen asking this for years and have NEVER gotten an answer so fukkit
>>224474962It's cardboard shite but it's the only pizza place open in the morning when you're hungover
>>2244747138 months old is significantly different in size to an 8 year old.
>>224474836jolly good idea
just yawned
>>224474958the internet is a battleground and words are my weapon.POW
No point in eating pasta without bread
>>224474977I was being straight kek
>>224475008one on one neither would have any chance against me
imagine buying a sex arse only for it to come alive and start sexing you
Bunch of freaks calling me mario while defending joggers destroying the uk
>>224475001It's in our blood. We weren't meant to get along with groups of people bigger than 100. You start seeing strangers who don't act like you all the time and the caveman part of your brain sends off a signal that you're being invaded.
>>224475018Braead bowl bangers
>>224474439
>>224475038It's not a you, it's a me.
i eat all my meals off bread trenchers
/brit/ be like>corrrr wouldn’t mind shagging my mum’s fat arse haha mint>ewwwww inbred paki’s fucking their cousins AUSLANDER RAUS
>>224475061she definitely could have done better
>>224474767get a car. public transport is for teenagers, losers, and old people.
>>224475022ywnbaw
>>224474523>the new arabok nigga?
>>224474453is there a reddit for everything? 20something antisocial shut in female neets that are also cute as hell?
>>224475069There's always been a modicum of doublethink to the words and actions of Airstrip One innit sir?
>>224475069Ian be like>pasta for dinner
chawie kiwk
>>224475081been one a long time*opens shorts*yup, still a woman - just checked
i am actually having pasta for tea
>>224475074I am a teenager
Any railway signallers in?
>>224475095a bit ethnic that Ian
>>224475069Hahahah
>>224474960Throwing a bounce house full of children at 78,387,578,925 mph completely shatters the fundamental laws of physics.Here is exactly what happens when you unleash that kind of impossible power:## 1. Breaking the Universal Speed Limit Your specified speed is roughly 117 times faster than the speed of light (c ≈ 670,616,629 mph). According to Einstein's theory of relativity, nothing with mass can travel faster than light, as it would require infinite energy. Your throw has effectively broken physics.## 2. Immediate Thermonuclear Explosion Before the bounce house can even leave your hands, it hits the wall of Earth's atmosphere. At this speed, air molecules cannot move out of the way fast enough. Instead, the atoms of the bounce house and the air undergo instant nuclear fusion. This would trigger a massive thermonuclear explosion, instantly vaporizing the bounce house, the kids, you, and likely a significant portion of the continent.## 3. Leaving the Galaxy (In a Magic Vacuum) If we pretend the atmosphere isn't there and the bounce house is indestructible:* Earth's escape velocity is a mere 25,000 mph.* At your speed, the bounce house clears the stratosphere in less than a microsecond. It would blast completely out of our solar system and exit the Milky Way galaxy in a matter of days.------------------------------On a real-world safety note:While this is a fun sci-fi physics thought experiment, real bounce houses actually do face severe risks from wind. Weakly anchored inflatables have been swept away by sudden gusts in tragic real-world accidents. Inflatables should always be heavily staked down or weighed down with sandbags, and immediately deflated if wind speeds approach 15–20 mph.
>>224475069one is a joke and the other is reality tho
women are having sexual relations with chatgpts
>>224475095Damn, some pasta sounds real good.
>>224474790Where's Robertson and Solanke?
i am actually raping my own arse
>>224475113It's good to try new things
>>224475107Grow up
>>224475120prove it
my pasta of choice? rigatoni
>>224475097leave
>>224475140Here is the mathematical proof behind those numbers using basic physics and constants.## Proof 1: Breaking the Speed of LightThe speed of light ($c$) in a vacuum is exactly 299,792,458 meters per second (or approximately 670,616,629 mph).Let's convert your speed into meters per second to compare them directly:$$ ext{Your speed} = 78,387,578,925 ext{ mph} imes 0.44704 left( rac{ ext{m/s}}{ ext{mph}}ight) = mathbf{35,042,383,282 ext{ m/s}}$$ Now, let's divide your speed by the speed of light:$$ rac{35,042,383,282 ext{ m/s}}{299,792,458 ext{ m/s}} = mathbf{116.89}$$ * Conclusion: Your bounce house is moving at 116.89 times the speed of light. According to Einstein's mass-energy equivalence ($E = gamma mc^2$), as an object with mass approaches $c$, its relativistic mass approaches infinity, requiring infinite energy. Going past it violates Special Relativity entirely.## Proof 2: Clearing the Stratosphere in a MicrosecondThe Earth's stratosphere ends at an altitude of roughly 50,000 meters (50 km) above sea level.To find out how long it takes the bounce house to exit the stratosphere at $35,042,383,282 ext{ m/s}$, we use the standard formula for time ($ ext{Time} = rac{ ext{Distance}}{ ext{Speed}}$):$$ ext{Time} = rac{50,000 ext{ m}}{35,042,383,282 ext{ m/s}} = mathbf{0.00000143 ext{ seconds}}$$ * Conclusion: $0.00000143$ seconds is exactly 1.43 microseconds. The human blink takes about 350,000 microseconds, meaning it would pass the stratosphere 240,000 times faster than a blink of an eye.,
>>224474805bit rich coming from someone in England where there is no nature whatsoever. where every tree was planted. even the animals are almost all introduced. personally i love England and its curated countryside, real nature is horrible and scary. but im sick of the overuse and frankly inappropriate use of "nature" to describe the outdoors of England (and Wales, most of Scotland and Ireland)
>>224475151You can.
>>224475123
>>224475064hope this is real because I'd like to know what bread you use
dont ever really enjoy anything just get brief relief when one stress ends and another is yet to start
>>224475095>>224475106>>224475125>>224475132Just prepared and ate spaghetti with sea urchins
God dam, scampie fries are banging
>>224475120love it when they come with really concerned messages about your health as well. like if it said all that and then said "the urgent matter at hand however is your imploding ballsack. please ring 999 immediately as this is a life-threatening situation"
>>224475097hahhahaahahhahahhahhayeah u go sister manrock on!
>>224475164“Hercule Poirot: ‘But this is not the country, my friend. The country is full of trees. And flowers! And public houses! This is a desert!’”
Charlie don't surf
>>224475189AYYY TONY MADE PASTA WITH THE SEA BUGS AYYY NOW THAT'S A SPICY MEAT'A'BALL
>>224475188KEK NIGGA THIS IS ME
>>224474819if you dont know football then how do you know those arent rugby teams?
>>224475221law of total probability
>>224475221rugby doesnt have 11 players lol
>>224474243ugly cunt
>>224475210Charlie don't do much today
>>224475244name field is at the top mate
socially repulsive profoundly unfuckable aura
>>224475216Spiky meatball*
>>224475251>just gamingyou utter mong
>>224475251oh my days
>>224475148for me its the shells or the twirls
Action Man bowtie
Sipping covfefe>>224475265My grandma used shells a lot. She is dead
wish the shops sold bucatini
>>224475245He can plank like a motherfucker
>>224475148I think I gotta tagliatelle on this one
>>224475286Knee slapper
>>224475251>5 jan 2022
>>224475251thats someone pretending to be Rachel Zegler the actress
>>224475281thoughts on orecchiette? I personally do not like it find it very unsatisfying to eat
>>224475251I can one up you although I was young and on the dating sites about a decade ago
>>224474962dominoes are fun, used to play it with my grandad.
>>224475304incel freaks ruminate over trivial things for many years
>>224475320ever shag him up the arse?
>>224475310Yea me too. I also dont like bucatini, too stiff
>>224475320hope he's dead now
>>224475328yes very frequently
>>224475251I long to message a woman 4.5 years after she messages meit will assert dominance
How many hours do you typically spend alone posting on 4chan?
>>224475310they're like tortellini / cappelletti that couldn't make the grade.
>>224475025what if it were a hundred 8 year olds at the same time?
>>22447533975 billion per week
>>224475339Im not alone im here with all my friends
>>224475311>I was young>40yo uncGrim
>>2244753396but you dont know if that means a dayor a weekor a monthbecause you're a retard and didnt give parameters
>>224475311:o)
>>224475344that would be hard but i think i could boot a few heads clean off before they wore me down
>>224475263good lord, she's......she's NAKED! does she know about this grave wardrobe malfunction????
>>224475330I tried them in bari where they were all hand made and they were still shit.
>>224475253I chuckled.
>>224475263is that skin or pants
>>224475263Che troia
>>224475345Rookie numbers you can pump those up
>>224475360I'm 33 now I was 22 at the time and I had some kind of weird complex where I felt like I needed to clown on everybody as a guard against being rejected
>>224472577
>>224475325Time stands still when you spend your every waking hour on 4chan.
>>224475376I think it came out in the news recently, that gypsy fuckers were buying industrial pasta and selling it as handmade to tourists. You have to buy the stuff from the grandmas who prepare the pasta before your eyes
>>224475401Rorke's dad laughing so much at this that he dies
>>224475405snickers is shite
>>224475251See I can't get dating apps because I don't know how I wouldn't reply to that with a "fuck you too nigger". But that "I can't believe you messaged me" was desperate as fuck bro you can't be doing that.
turns out it was the most dangerous lead after all
imagine having sex with a british chick and she's like "gorr yea blimey love right up me dirty ol shit pipe that is proper phwoarrr"
Canadian.jpg
Went on a bicycle ride and then ate poached eggs on toast followed by a chocolate cupcake. I have vague intentions of doing some DIY today but I feel incredibly lazy after all that
>>224475410wouldn't surprise me there was loads of indians working in the tourist trap restaurants aswell
How was your Friday night out with your squad?
>>224475430Needs a seatbelt for the urn
>>224475426haha great bit of cultural humour that yes our women do indeed speak like that
>>224475426This but it's a British lad instead
>>224475328nope>>224475333he is, died in june. but he was blind for the last 10 years and gave up trying to play games. damn shame because he was great at a number of pub games and cards. still 93 was a bloody good innings for a man who lived his life as he did.
>>224475430>ah, how did you know i was bosnian?
>>224475426>spunk in me gob ya munter
>>224475454he crashes the car and the urn immediately launches up into space at 59852978mph
>>224475450Didn't go. Was keeping myself fresh for this morning's incel walk. 17 miles in the books today, so I've earned a drink or 2 (by myself) later.
>>224475426Imagine not being scared to talk to women.
>>224475443Yes and not just there. The quality of restaurant cooking is taking a nosedive. It's funny because people notice it and they keep repeating "it was good wasnt it" to convinve themselves and others
>>224475339100 a year, maybe
that new chaka khan tune is pretty good. not bad for an old bird
>>224475450spent it lying alone in bed researching smocks for hiking
>>224475311Based as fuck.
>>224475430This guy cna be funny
>>224475490>by myselfYou say that like you arn't alone most of the time.
>>224475493italian food has always been best when made at home to be enjoyed with loved ones 2bh, all food is best that way. i think most restaurants everywhere are overrated
>>224475514Damn, you got me lad.
>>224475505This guy is really from Nigger Mountain. I didn't know Nigger Mountain had its own flag.
Average Toronto anon
>>224475363yes the problem would getting tired halfway and no longer taking satisfaction with piling up the dead bodies for parents to collect.
>>224475493I maybe didnt go to any good places but the food was quite average. The best thing was the fruit best watermelon ive ever had in my life.
GM everyone just checking in to see if anyone has anything they want to tell me before I start my day
>>224475405soysneedoil go(y)obars
190 would've loved /brit/ becoming an incel general
>>224475565Yankie goober dandy
>>224475561i was on the exercise bike earlier and the seat was uncomfortable so my bum hurts a bit now
really have completely fucked my life up, there's no salvaging it
>>224475608>>224475608>>224475608
shitting and screaming through the disabled neighbours letterbox at 3am
>>224475561Yes it's half past 2, not the morning at all, you should be half way through your day at this point. Grow up.
>>224475606
>>224475606The bike in question
I've only ever shagged one arse. A South-East Asian women who was a bit overly eager for it so I thought i'd give it a do. Thankfully her arse was clean so the condom didn't come out pooey. Never bothered again, just not that into sex arses.
>>224475683We're referring to an Indonesian or a Laotian here?
>>224475910Vietnamese
>>224474187What's so bad about your sister?
>>224474201Rather than appreciate it I get mad that there are barely any key ingredients on this Planet. I feel like I spend my life eating Garlic and Onions every meal.I imagine there's a Planet far away with a totally different flaura that provides 100 different vegetables that are equally powerful with the same depth. Imagine the countless tasty but unique dishes that would come from them. I guess I should appreciate garlic though as he is quite a hero. Every cuisine would be way less satisfying without him
Sorry, missed out Tomato. Another ubiquitous essential
>>224474245Go away with your CNN news. We do not care
>>224474476In these situations always mess them around. Tell her to get the piercing and you'll bring the cash, or creative waste of time you can think of.They are no different to online scammers, and this is a big deterrent
>>224474275Could've given us more of a context
>>224474275
