Did you sing the postperson song today when the postperson delivered your post edish
postperson patpostperson patpostperson pat and his black and white son
>>225073592We should stop saying 'lads' and switch to something more gender neutral
Can you help us find Hunni?Hunni, aged 13, was last seen in Oak Flats on Thursday, 17 September 2026.
>>225073610cockmogs me tbf
thats a really slutty name wtf
>>225073600https://www.pornhub.com/view_video.php?viewkey=6a592054a020c
I'm So Proud to Be a Part of This Community !!!
the room is shouting in a language made of tin foilwe sit in the armchair breathing the grey foggently turning down the volume of a sun that isnt ourslet the noise bounce off the wallpaperthe kettle is boiling anyway
mi tink mi gwaan fuk mi own wife
SHEVA COME ON ROGER SHEVA HURRY
Free John Honey
Fuck it, going to buy that new wow forever beta access like a mong
just remembered that eddie izzard trooned out a while back
>>225073643postman pat is not a slutty name you freak
Love their legs
have a big knob but badly wish it was biggerthis must be how olympic silver medallists feel
>>225072881Well I've never seen any with obvious symptoms but how the fuck would I know for certain?Can herpes spread without symptoms?
>>225073621shared poowong
>>225073682YesThat's often how people spread it, they don't know they have it because they don't show any symptoms.
Sex The Rapist
Poo shit wank arse cum smeg willy willard knob cock dick wank penis fanny vag arse bumhole anus smeg wank sick fart shit poo diarrhea bum sick burp knobule jiblets goolies cottaging bumming rape dildo fisting blowjob earwank feet knobule shitearse wank
>>225073679How big?
>>225073682yes it can, a huge proportion if herpes carriers are symptomless, you might even have it and not know
>>225073678:)
>>225073705buy me a drink first x
>>225073592Post person Sam, they/them
Women actually hate big nobs, vaginas are only 4 inches deep
thinking about Apple the cat, hope she was adopted by someone in the end xx
>>2250737144.5 incher confirmed
>>225073701was just saying this to the job coach, it all fell on deaf ears of course
Just bought a cardcaptor sakura gameboy. Got it cheap because the gameboy is broken but the internals are the same as any other gameboy so I'll just clean the shell up and put a working board in itAnother cool console for my collection
There is no such thing as an American ethnicity
postlad pat
/brit/ wankers be like "it fucking cooms"sorry
>>225073729Is that what your mum tells you?
>>225073731
>>225073722#antifacist #antiracist #killstraightwhitemen
>>225073732Me when the rorke mousenonce tim spaki pooseal done him so this is okay i will doing a any man in
>>225073705an absolute mamba at 4.4 inches
>>225073746Bit of a gamer are we?
Everytime I hear a siren I assume my time has come and the police are framing me for either terrorism, hate speech or having nonce images. We live in an age where it is extremely easy to frame someone for crimes.
>>225073772i dabble
>>225073763haha silly catberg
Gonna watch Halloween soon
in the centrelink waiting room spawning gmod hunter choppers and roller mines
what happened to mambos number 1 to 4?
>>225073776>framing sure buddy
>>225073776I was accused of stealing art from a museum. I was framed
>>225073763Need that cunt fired out of a cannon over the city walls
>>225073781get halloween 3 on
>>225073789stolen by niggers
Erm... I said HELLO
>>225073776I used to have this same fear but for all the movies and music I used to download, then I found out almost everyone downloads movies and music and then I stopped worrying
we support the orange order don’t we
mad that “niggas” on /brit/ write their own head-canon about themselves but decide to make it bad
how do you join the illuminati? i assume you have to be jewish but that's fine i can convert
>>225073819you ain't Ian
I would take a bullet up my arse for Israel
What do we reckon to all this Fairford business then?Sloppy job Mossad?
Going to make some bigot sandwiches later
>>225073825Got a letter from my broadband company years and years ago about torrenting shit, just ignored it and have never heard since
>>225073832need to marry a jewess for that mate, and we both know that’s never happening (the marrying part)
Well that is truly fascinating wow, I'm impressed *goes to the other room and hangs himself*
>>225073846seems weird that they would eat mushrooms in a world that's been crippled by a mushroom plague
grow up
5 men with 3 ven
>>225073697fuck's sakeHow do I get tested for herpes?
40 minutes and the hunt is on, lads
>>225073864hmm… the fall must’ve killed him, rope most likely snapped the second he jumped off the chair, which we can see is bent
>>225073875desperately want to eat out a woman's sweaty hairy armpit like a vagina
>>225073845Perfectly executed job Mossad to sway public opinion of Palestine supporters.
women
>>225073889phone your gp and tell them you've been shagging prostitutes and might have picked up a disease off them
need my STI test results back pronto I don't have any sores or discharge on my penis but my legs feel achy and I get the occasional twinge/tickling feeling in my thighs
stds are a punishment for premarital sex. youre meant to wait for your soulmate not shag disease-ridden trollops
>Diesel is now selling at its highest price ever: forecourts are charing 199.18p per litre on average in the UK, according to the RAC, surpassing the previous record set in June 2022 after Russia’s invasion of Ukraine.it's so over
Australian missing children posts be like>Danyella is 12 years old. She was last seen at an address in Shrimpora Bay on the 22nd September 2026. If you have any information as to her whereabouts, please get in touch with Woggaville Police Force
just found out raf fairford was US base so i no longer careWhy the fuck are there American bases here anyway joke
>>225073918all need arresting
i know when that hotline bling
why you lot all going to the clap clinic?
>>225073895EEERGGGGGGGGGGGG ERGGGGGGGG AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
im poor as fuck and I’ve never once looked at or understood the price of petrol I just fill the car up it costs what it costs
Sir Poo Eater Starner
>>225073954we all had sex on the weekendnow someone reply with a witty retort about how we all had sex with each other
>>225073932if trump bans the export of diesel there will be big problems
Tights kneesocks
>1.8 million people assessed as eligible for work but are not in workOh so me then
sadly raped to death of course
>>225073959ktim same at the shops what actual nerds notice the price of things changing i swear ground beef has always been a fiver
>>225073983my amazon basket after installing Arch Linux
>>225073983for me its leggings
my pokemon cards approach i am so excited :)
The biggest STD you can get is life itself
>>225073678>>225073712
>>225074005bore off bloglord
not my fault they're so fit
Any CFNM fans in?
You will be disintegrated
*gets disintegrated*
OH MY DAYS TUNE ON THE TELLY RIGHT NOW LADS
doing the cha-cha slide
time for shavetoil
you can just be a nonce without trying to be covert about itnobody's going to arrest you for words and everybody already knows what you're talking about just a weird pathetic game to play i dont get it
>>225074042get that pussy waxed girly x
>>225074034swedelad can you have a word with the new swede he makes everyone uncomfortable
Tv shows, films, games, music all shite now because of woke
>>225074036FUCKING HELL
giving sweet baby angel catberg a kiss and a cuddle because i love and adore him with all my heart
the beatles didn't really live in a yellow submarine it was all a lie to sell records
>>225073931I got to 29 as a virgin, I was never gonna get a "soulmate"
>>225074063Cats don't understand kisses and cuddles you fucking retard, he thinks you're trying to eat him
Articuno is kino. One of my favourite legendaries
have had no running water since 7 this morning. it's a disgrace. i'm very thirsty.
>>225074069>29 as a virginscreamnig
>>225074051whenever i reply to him he replies back with “obsessed”, but i agree he’s odd
doing the cha-cha slide over an australian's corpse
>>225074083Are you working today?
>>225074086Just gone and doxxed yourself there you fucking chump
>>225074080wrong
>>225074083You should buy a bicycle
have my dinner before gymtoil i reckon. just makes sense dun it?
>>225074086think you're allowed to get a sip from the thames at times like this
>>225074086mi liv in kingston town ya'erdme
>>225074099No>>225074106I actually had a dream I had a bike. I don't know if I'd be able to ride one
why do bongs suffix everything with "toil"?
men were expected to shave every day and if they were the 5 o clock shadow type they'd give themselves a quick on in the bathroom at workmental that... i shave once a month lol
haven't been outside London for six years now
Just remembered the Rape of Nanking
>>225074083You're still a faggot, spaino
bracing myself to wrestle el niño to the floor
vidyatoil on the cards
>>225074125plenty of nature in london
>>225074044keep in mind the fact that the nonces on here are probably genuinely bottom of the barrel mentally ill human beings irl with no sensible baseline understanding of human interaction whatsoever, they probably either assume we're just laughing along with their wacky child rape jokes or their isolated autist minds just assume that everyone else is also a closet nonce
>>225074119Pathetic. Get a bike. Learn to ride the fucking bike. I imagine you can't swim either?
>>225074125some people are properly mental innit
For me, it's the Rapes of Sussex
>>225074123Before I had laser I used to shave 3-4 times a day. I remember going to school in year 9 with my face bleeding from over shaving it
>>225074086BENTALL’S CENTRE
>>225074101yes mine is the house with no water and a very thirsty bloke inside
>>225074120screaming imagining some gormless yank visiting the uk and saying "toil" after every word thinking that's how people actually speak
>>225074137I don't know if I'd even use a bike. I was able to swim but haven't swam in a long time now so it's possible I have forgotten
>>225074125>r/agender
>>225074161scr
Japan and Venezuela are currently playing a Friendly. what a pisstake time and day to do it
>>225074161engaged in poo screamtoil upon reading this post
visit norn iron
wish I had a job. and money
>>225074161>>225074168its funny but not ‘scream’ worthy imo
>>225074123I shaved this morning, hadn't done it in the last 6 months
Would love to sniff and lick employed woman's bike seat after a lengthy sweaty bike ride
Rorke falling off a ladder and breaking his wrist after trying to put an England flag on his nearest lamppost.
>>225074188look at little miss pipedream fantasy over here
>>225074193boringtoil
>>225073610ktim
>>225074187even their women are orange!
>>225074193vpn off yankmong foytoil
>>225074166If you learn how to ride a bike with proof I will send you 50 quid in bitcoin. Get it done.
>>225074166it's not something you forget. it's like riding a bike
paganism over Christianity
>>225074213
little miss muffet sat on a tuffet
>>225074193
yank in the pub ordering a pint of steller artoys
deeply nostalgic for an era I wasn't even around for
>>225074228actually fucking screaming
>>225074203Rorkes dad did something similar
>>225074235remember when they argued about the shoes in this photo for like 2 hours
heard a yank say bollocks once. ludicrous.
>>225074228Brilliant post
This is England, we speak English here
>>225074203imagining himself a wounded veteran from the somme like the book he just read
poo nigger
could never go to england cause i'd just start instinctively swinging at cunts as soon as i step off the plane
>>225074228bet this goes hard in the aus trancord
>>225074263scr
>>225074083only gen1 bird that feels legendary since you have to go deep into seafoam islands to find itmeanwhile Zapdos and Moltres are hidden behind some boxes in a warehouse and just plopped in victory road respectively
>>225074228idgi
>>225074149>bloke in knickers talks about shaving his faceCan't make it up
I’ve never been to a pub do you say pint of beer? Pint of lager? Pint of [brand name]? But then how do you know what type s they have because I’m pretty sure the brands logo they have on the tap thing isn’t always what they actually have available
>>225074265Oh my days, honey, you couldn't fight a paper bag
>>225074267*fists myself right up to the wrist and shoves my brown thumb and two brown fingers in your mouth and nostrils all bowling ball like*
inane
>>225074278i know the answer but im not telling you. go to the pub and find out for yourself
we have kind of developed our own zoomer-esque brainrot dialect round here
If you can't ride a bike and can't swim you should be sent to a detention camp for intensive training.
just imagined a yank saying oh my days out loud and instinctively swung at my screen
Ah shit just realised I've booked someone to come and cut the trees down in the garden but I'm fairly sure it's a guy who was the year below me in school who randomly decided to spark me out one day for no reason. He also shouted something at me when I walked past him a few years ago assuming it's the same person
>>225074235is that snood?
>>225074278They have a menu in Spoonsor you can see the taps at the barYou ask for a pint of whatever you want that they have on tap
>>225074278Bar staff are terribly busy and often rushed off their feet so you say >[drink]. Pint ofThen you keep it moving
>>225074278Pint of whateverIf they don't have it they'll say it and you can assk for what's recommeded that's like it>>225074309Mad the stories you invent about yourseolf, lad>>225074312Snood and the redhead. Not sure who the other two are
all the best memes on /brit/ were invented by one australian lad
>>225074228you cheeky buggers
You can't seriously be that autistic, fucking hell
>>225074309what if he pins you down and bums you this time
>>225074329his name is wacky bruce
>>225074332No I really am LOL
>>225074278depends oobviously
reckon very few people actually scream when they type "scr"bit dishonest
>>225074301i don't want to hear a soilennial complain about zoomer lingo ever again
>>225074353sybau
>I’ve never been to a pubgenuinely speechless rnsome lads having no friends or being virgins etc is usually understandable but the idea of never ONCE setting foot in a pub boggles my brain
>>225074353tough titties lad
I love her so much
If there is a TV, and it serves shite like Foster's, then it's not a real pub
>>225074353high key cringe post
>>225074326>>[drink]. Pint of>Then you keep it moving
yanks are the de jure authority on pubs are they
tell me lads how to brew a proppa cuppa inglish tea now innit
yanks don't even have pubs
homer, bart, lisa, maggy , marge, snowball II, santas little helper, grandpa, patty and selma, grandma bouvier
>>225074405Pg tips tea bags for starters
>>225074415the "simpsons" niggas
>>225074415And graggle. Don't forget him
>>225074362alri alkie there are other things in life like gardening or reading a book
moe, barney, lenny, carl, mr burns, smithers,
>>225074415I only recently understood the hidden joke of calling a black cat Snowball
had the pg tips monkey as a kidand his mugwhat tea do you lot like? personally a yorkshire tea lad with the bag left in
>>225074443the "simpsons ancillary cast" niggas
they made a robot of me
Give it a sniff!
Wunce upon a time thare livd a poor boy named Dick Whittington, hooze faather and muther were bothe ded. Having neether home nor frends, he roamed about the cuntry trying to ern hiz living. Sumtimes he cood not finde any wurk, and he offen had to go hungry. On market days he herd the farmers tauk about the greit city of Lundon. They sed that its streets were paved with gold. So Dick made up hiz minde to go to Lundon and seek hiz fortune. Packing hiz clothes into a bundle and cauling hiz faithful cat he started out. After days and days ov wauking, the hungry lad finally reached Lundon.
How do you eat your sashimi? Do you mix the soy sauce and wasabi together to dip, or do you pour everything separately including the ginger slices? What's your go to strategy?
>>225074119you'd like it because there is lots of women specific bikes and clothing that you can use to perform your gender
>>225074440sorry but this is complete cope mate you know full well the appeal of any drinking establishment is the social aspect also lmaoing @ the fact that you assume pubgoers have no inner lives but you do. a man posting alone on 4chan in the middle of a workday
>>225074278I love to fuck with bar staff so I just say pint of lagerIf they're sensible they get me the bog standard pint they doIf they want to make their lives harder they'll say "we have 4 lagers which one" at which point I ask them to name each one and ask for a taster of something really common like Carling Should see their faces
>>225074458And me, the Runt Slayer 3000.
>>2250744945'7 behaviour
>>225074484i dribble the soy sauce over all of the pieces first. then, i put a bit of wasabi on top of each piece. then, i stick a slice of ginger to each piece. then i eat each piece
*Blocks your path and doesn't even notice you're there*
another miserable day of my dogshit life
>like gardening or reading a bookBlud is Alan Titchmarsh
>>225074508try cheering up?
>>225074086Had this happen a few weeks back where the whole estate was without water for 3 days cause of a leak.Ended up getting a water storage container just incase it ever happens again.
Sir Abby Titmuss
>>225074484>>225074505the ginger is for palate cleansing lads>fish into wasabi>small dip into soy>eatno point in eating sashimi if you're going to completely ruin the taste of the fish by covering it in soy sauce and wasabi
only seeing others fail makes me happy
you'd think a water leak would result in more water not less
>>225074502I am quite literally five foot seven yes
>>225074350well no one actually laughs out loud when they write "lol", this has been common knowledge since the 90s
>>225074506She’s Asian, therefore she would notice my thick cummy fat White cock bursting at the seams needing to be drained
I have no mates
>>225074449I drink Tetley tea.It was the tea my parents drank so i just ended up sticking with it.
peter lois meg brian stewie quagmire joe bonnie cleveland
>>225074536i am a sushi professional. i know what i am doing. the ginger goes ON the fish
>>225074537>the man failed to kick the ballscr
>>225074542Not a fan of sharing a general with manlets. Going to have to ask you to leave
>>225074542small willy too
>pint thereoffucking roar
I'm 6'3 but I've got the spirit of a 5'6
>>225074086thats what happens when water companies prioritise shareholder dividends over improving infrastructure
sitting my white ass down and listening
>>225074576now you mention it, im actually 5'6
I'm white, but I have a black man inside of me
water's back on lads. weak pressure but enough to fill the kettle.
ordered more long socks and little skirtwill be shaving my cock balls and arse and hopefully this weekend someone will come over and fuck me
>>225074591fictional black men getting two wives while I'm stuck living in Nossex
Let's do this Bradley
>>225074610trip on spaino x
any fans of in?
can't be bothered to go to a barber so i'm going to get the clippers out and run them over my headshould be ok yeah
Young Bob is a 6'2 brick shithouse
>>225074602Flush the tap out for a bit incase there's sediment in the water
>>225074610Where abouts do you live? x
>>225074637What's he gonna do about the name when he becomes unc?
Cutting your own hair is bad luck
>>225074610my cock your arse do the maths
>>225074610dm me i'll fly you out to poowong international
>>225074637Raped I'm afraid
Mad when you’ve got cunts like cansmong here all day posting about imaginary people like spaino
any of you figured out how to drink every night and not get cirrhosis
>I'm 6'2" I should be incredibly intimidating
>out of office is on>work phone still rings on teamsDoes this cunt not know how to fucking understand what out of office means
>>225074691no plans for your day off today then lad? just being miserable here?
unc ahh shows both
>>225074686have you tried vaporized ethanol?
>>225074686get into weed as well and just drink lessdoes run the risk of you becoming addicted to both thoughbeit
>>225074686get a blood test. they can check serum levels of this compound associated with cirrhosis. mine was "elevated" or something. drank almost daily for about 10 years. can still recover apparently if i quit.
>>225074702Had a few days offThursday was spent looking forward to the cans so had the cansFriday was spent looking forward to the cans so had the cansSaturday was th e sameSunday I was recoveringMight hjave them tonight
>>225074690
Don't set off spaki his nappy hasn't been changed yet
poowong bungalow for half a mill
>>225074721Been happening for generations
>>225074718can't wait for you to drop dead soon so we dont have to read your dull dogshit posts and instantly forget about you forever
*starts cheekily watching gay porn in the middle of the thread**shoves a cheeky finger up my arse while doing gay porn moans*
I quit my job when mum died July last year and have just been rotting in my inherited house living off savings and the £200k I also inherited ever sinceonly leave to shop at aldi, spend less than £700 a month for everything
>>225074748ancient mogging
>>225074760are you happy
>>225074748scrim
>>225074750Only replied to a post asking about me x
>>225074760this is also what i'll be doing when mumberg carks it
>>225074770no but I wasn't happy before eitherat least now I sleep a full eight hours
only replied to cansmong so I could get him to say cans to test my filter
>>225074760how long will that last you?
>>225071982>>225071982
zoomers have to diarise and fixate on their schizo dolly list because their brains cannot comprehend anonymity
>>225074810You mad lad that's the old!
make a new new i say, recycling is for proofs
>>225073609>>225073609>>225073609
