Could service my iphone for 315 quid
screaming
right well we don't need three new threads do we lads
THREE bloody news what the flip
the news all showing up like buses lol
i only said i done it so i wouldn't have to eat any more of me own poo
made fucking mince meat of the new's lads
>>225455292don't ignore my vent post in the old you rancid swine
sex gifs
I liked the one with the little lad getting new clothes
went on a second date with the chick with the chopped teeth and moshe shaved the mo and was looking much cuter this time. I think I need to make her my gf
swore to myself that i would only ever suck a cock if three /brit/ threads were made and posted simultaneously
how come people like to take the piss out of dentists and say they're not real doctors, but a nigga who specialises in bumholes is absolutely considered a real doctor
>>225455320Shit, that's what people are going to reply to him with innit
>>225455322
>>225455322thanks mate, some /brit/ lads would do well to dress a bit better
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DJt17hz3YXI Tuesday's tunage. Been getting in to the Beatles lately
Lmfao based
nearly saw an old lady get run over onceshe was crossing the road slowly obvand someone driving thought the smart thing to do was not to just slow down and let her cross but speed up and swerve around herwas literally cms away from hergot so upset i actually shouting YOU FUCKING WANKER at the top of my voice then went and helped her acrossshe was visibly shaken and I waited with her by the bus stop until she calmed downfucking hate car mongs so much
>>225455311>>225455313>>225455333>>225455344have you lot all just got out of a dogshit australian poster meeting and logged on for the evening or what
>>225455363She's dead now of course
>>225455357genuinely a class fit
>>225455377cricket just finished
>>225455357he looked nicer before. now he looks like a pretender
>>225455377Oh look it's the Gordon Ramsay of /brit/ posts, if Gordon Ramsay never cooked anything better than a beef and tomato pot noodle.
rate the drip
>>225455397bet you wear crocs lol
>>225455357I've been in that shop
>>225455403>beef and tomato pot noodle.*lick's lip's*
>>225455363Taught her a lesson though didn't it
>>225455419i do not tho
>>225455377aye
>>225455357this changed rorke
tomato juice is grim
Think I just saw an old mateberg but I didn't really look cause if it was him and we saw each other I'd have to acknowledge him
>>225455484ktim I thought I saw an old mate in town a few weekends ago sat looking at his phone and I started to panic that I'd have to stop and chat, so I started walking faster hoping he didn't see me but it wasn't him thankfully
I used to watch h3h3 religiously when I was at school
im going to become a state trooper
genuinely been edging for three straight days
>>225455458I don't get it. You squeeze an orange you get orange juice. You squeeze a lemon you get lemon juice. You squeeze an apple you get apple juice. You squeeze a lime you get lime juice. You squeeze a tomato you get water. And yet they sell tomato juice and it's like they've boiled down 50 gallons of the stuff. What's that about?
>>225455505Why
>>225455357omg this guy actually looks like mefml
>>225455510not sure
>>225455512the big guy or little guy
Dont like playing new games or watching new shows Just like doing things I've done already Scared of the unknown you see
>>225455527little one obvs
>>225455249https://youtube.com/watch?v=OcZMn5ddSrkBritish people and tigers make me feel happy since 1968. Thank you, Altai!
Remember when there was a meme about Oreos being deliciousAbsolutely vile American shite for goycattle.
Been saying for a while that I think kemi badenoch will be our next Prime Minister and looking at the new polls it looks like that might just happen. Reform absolute bottlejobs
right well Chubb (who are in charge of insuring my phone) have just raised the cost of my phone insurance by 56 PENCE
>>225455509nice try pal but you're not getting my recipe
>>225455544boomers are VERY interested in their inheritance tax proposals
>>225455540They taste like cheap stale bourbon biscuits.
>>225455532oh honey
>>225455540was just saying this down the pub
this is the thread
looks like russia are losing the war
>>225455537are you an autistic 70 year old german man whats your story
>>225455582yup been on the dating apps for a week and almost 0 likes even in london
>>225455559>Chubbaw *rubs his cheeks*
>>225455599I was just too late on /int/. They all celebrated the tiger some days ago.
>>225455594vatniks wil fume
feel sorry for Russian and ukranian men their women are getting swooped up while they’re dying
>>225455627Sad thing is Ukrainian will be a paki nigger country in like 30 years
>>225455471If someone would just tell me what to wear I would wear that but instead they only ever criticise what I do wear
>>225455602oh it's you please consider my sympathy rescinded
Poo. Emma Watson's. Hot.
>>225455655wtf...
rorke: death decodes the howls from our hands
>>225455627The market for Ukrainian mail order brides is exploding, I'm talking buy two get one free type of deal
>>225455649No need for the racism lad
Remember when my mum wondered aloud who was that who played hermione in that harry potter, and I answered FAR too quickly for a grown man who has never seen harry potter
another salad eatenanother clue in the clue bank
the new commute
what if heathermong is cute
>>225455754Reckon he's ghastly
rewatching the rlm halloween specials in preparation for this year's halloween special
Emmayank has conditioned me to think of poo whenever I see her name
riding my penny farthing to my centrelink appointment
im english
>>225455787bizarre lie
>The BBC is planning to examine the life and career of J.K. Rowling in a two-part documentary that is likely to spark significant scrutiny. >The second episode will examine her interventions on Scottish independence, feminism, free speech and gender identity, which place her at the heart of increasingly bitter online exchanges. upset troons at your peril
once you realise you should be using the snack option of a meal deal to get a cheeky choccy bar or something nice and then just buy a proper sized bag of crisps in addition, the second half of your life begins
You know I got to have my Matcha Ngga
>>225455802hope this coincides with all the december seethe over the potter hbo series
im a egg
>our>us>weNigga who the fuck are u
sacked tranny pinning me down and raping me with his masculine penis
>>225455848had a potter about in your mum's (co)insides last night
>>225455842why do you people eat like children i'm not even talking about the food itself it's your entire mindset surrounding food consumption
>>225455878you H(ave)BO
strewth cobber, it's 12 o'clock on a weekday, better pre-heat the oven and sharpen my paring knives
Family Guy
midget gems
dying is quite a low income activity
>>225455865he arrived here when he was 11 ok he's as english as anyone
Joe Biden
Sat in the staff canteen alone browsing /brit/ while everyone else chats what a lifeStill, at least I can hold down a job which is more than can be said for a lot of you freaks Is that alright with you de lads?
>>225455977I can also hold down a jobwhat do you want, a medal?
>>225455977so do i mate kekbeing a dole bludger would be more honourable than whatever your fucked up normie purgatory situation is
dunno if i can hold down a job never tried actually so there
>>225455977reckon the majority of /brit/ are toilersthink the unemployment rate of 4chan in general has gone down as the average poster gets older
I mean it's borderline unsafe for work https://i.4cdn.org/tv/1791892477925371.webm
*starts doing the monster mash*
>>225456019Very close to the mark that one for sure
Umpoppingtons
>>225456019Is this a man or a womanI need to know so I can know whether to be aroused with my penis or with my bumhole
seeeeEEEEEEEEXXX*starts shaking wildly*
kemi gyatenouch
>>225455357he still looks like a wetwipe, just a wetwipe that borrowed someone else's smart clothes
when I first came to /brit/ I was 100% /brit/posting after toil just sat in my smelly bedroomthen in my first house I was 100% AT toil on a sneaky second monitorthen after covid I was 100% toilposting in my smelly bedroomnow in my second house I'm 100% toilposting in my smelly home office
Feel sad after therapytoil but dogberg always here to greet me and give me his equivalent of a hug.
use my arsehole as a cunt
>>225456054i dont need it.... i dont need it....
>>225456073Use my arseUse my arse
not allowed my phone at work so the only time I ever /brit/post is on my day off (such as today)
catching up on the latest rorke posts in the archive just incase I missed any developments and updates with rorke
bore off redditflaggers
Proper can't be arsed toil wise last few working daysDefinitely getting that end of year meh and just want to clock off for a couple of weeks and get pissed in the pub all Christmas
>>225456069>first house>pre covid
rorke you've gone feral
>>225456054mogged by ruby granger sex arse
>>225456118ktim but actually all year long. Genuinely such a tremendous effort to bring myself to do even the smallest of toil tasks.
>>225455977I'd rather eat my lunch literally anywhere outside than a break room. I don't get them, go to the park and sit on a bench or summin. I don't want to talk to my colleagues on lunch break or be inside the toil box
Having lunch in my car lads
>>225456118it's the middle of october lad there's still 2 and a half months left of the year, much work to be done entering numbers into spreadsheets, answering phones, perhaps moving items from one area of a warehouse to another etcit's all very important work and cannot simply be ignored
>>225456054Kemi Badenoch sucking your willie like it was a fresh piece of fufu covered in green leaf stew
>>225456168sih seve se
IMG_mould.jpg
>>225456152Had one of these doughnuts when I lived in America. These things are crazy addictive it's no wonder they're all big over there.
>>225456168six seven
British Mohels insulting one another: "you couldn't organise a bris up in a Jewry"
that's not him he is not having lunch in his car he doesn't have a car or job or even leave his smelly childhood bedroom
colleague was asking what shortened version of my name I like to go by and I said "you can call me anything you want" and she got a bit flustered
>>225456190Very good
>accidentally posted about raping rorke in the teams chat instead of /brit/
greensleeves was all my joy
my bretton? woodsmy liberalism? neomy charles? tyrwhitt
>>225456194we know lad, some autist crossposts an image from R*ddit of a meal deal/tesco poverty dinner almost daily
>smelly childhood bedroomkyle rigg projection
skipiti rizz
>>225456210Hate it when they do that. I just try a different name each time till they react with one they don't like then stick to it
skibidi burnham
skibly christmas
my friend is a window washer, he says he mostly loves his job but some days he can't handle the pane
>>225456215Thank you, I came up with it watching a BBC archive piece on breweries, wanted to tell someone but knew my friends and gfberg would be too uncultured to get it. Would have to explain what a Mohel is and what a bris is and before you know it its not funny anymore
>sorry we're not accepting new patients at the momentevery single clinic says thisif I'd known not seeing my gp for a few years meant I would never get to see a GP again I might have booked an appointmentneed my heart looked at but just outright don't have access to medical care
>>225456194yeah its one of his strange OCD rituals
Takes me 10 minutes to walk to the pub and about an hour and a half to walk back. The difference is staggering
>>225456236your sex life? nonexistent your fetish? black peopleyour gimmicks? fucking horrible
>>225456295Sorry mate all the brown families have all the spots now
>>225456300jet stream isn't it?
>>225456282
Got the leftover cottage pie in the reheatenator
It takes me ten minutes to walk to the pub but an hour and a half to walk back. The difference is staggering!
shagged myself up my own arse life-wise
>>225456305you aint never gon know this feeling lmao
num num num
>>225455249im a cat
Law and Order organised crime torrents been stalled for 3 monthsGuess I'm not watching this then am I
a few years ago vaping used to be quite heavily mocked and niche but now everyone does it, whatever happened there
>>225456349haha scream great one mate love it
>>225456351That's erotic isn't it
im on a seaweed diet. i see weed and friggin smoke it lmao
Starmer: Not quite my tempo..Burnham: *blushes*Burnham: *resumes bobbing up and down on his knob*Starmer: *raises hand into a fist indicating stoppage*Starmer: Now were you supposed to be sucking or jacking?Burnham: I-I...Stamer: Answer me!
>>225456362nobody will miss you when you're dead lmao
>blackboyjoyindian coded filename
>>225456349rpae fuck.roar shitting
>>225456351how weird is it to have a lactation fetish? Considering telling the proto gf but don't want her thinking I'm a perverted freak
>>225456388yo momma will LOL
>>225456375get your mind out the gutter lad its just a pair of soft milky leaking tits
im on a rape rorke diet, i see rorke and i friggin rape him
>>225456401Completely normal but will not be interpreted as such, keep it to yourself until (if) you actually get her pregnant and then introduce it as a joke
>>225456424gp
ok the zeidmeister general pulled it back with that one ngl
my nan sex arse
ooooh-aaaaaaarrrrseI wanna be with poo everywhere
>>225456387*WEF impressed*
>>225456415got me
remember that video of the old lady sucking a knob that was posted a few days ago
>>225456401Was pretty weird when my dad told me about his one. Didn't really enjoy the unpleasant associations.
>>225456426so when we start talking about each other's kinks should I just say I like feet or something
>>225456362that is just alcohol really isn't itthe feeling is alcohol raping your brain to release the good chemicals
https://youtu.be/Fm72DPJCX58?si=YDHE1H5QvslYzNv4Shout out to my Layne niggas
>>225456439>>225456476freak
>>225456489theyre high off neoliberalism
>>225456482Yeah that's the most socially acceptable fetish these days, also one of the most common, but don't go too hard on it because she might start trying to toe-ing your arnuse
>>225456479you best believe when she was pregnant with you daddy was sucking on those big engorged tiddies like a starving calf
meeting mumsy for a spot of luncheon later in the week, need to get her a little gift. Thinking some kind of homeware tat from the big supermarket like a ceramic glass pumpkin candleholder or some such. She'll enjoy that, can put it in her window.
>>225456525eshuta?
doing my lunchtime crosswordcan hear people shouting
>>225456516
the old people of today grew up in the 60s you see so they know all about blowjobs and anal
>>225456525wait you're supposed to get her spontaneous gifts each time you meet? I bring mumberg fuck all unless it's her birthday
what do you think made the first person to suck a willy think they should try sucking the willy?
>>225456525Lingerie
>>225456563This nigga doesn't buy his mum gifts
>>225456573seeing a baby cow suck the breast willies
>>225456516Come on lad, leave me alone. I've got enough shit to deal with over here.
>>225456554thought the 70s was the real degenerate decade
>>225456573cock lust
we don't see enough lava levels in video games these daysbring back lava levels
>>225456573I would say it's a natural human instinct to show affection with your mouth, lads were probably getting blowies as far back as the caveman days
>>225456618lava croft: poo wader
>>225456554They all fought in WW2
mr lava levelme lava hmmm
>>225456627>>225456645these are great keep em coming
>>225456618This nigga wanting lava levels
would love to have met the first man to invent tits
>>225456635no they didn't my nan is 80 and wasn't born in WW2
>>225456669rorke's mother
>>225456662tits have just been invented and you want to meet mensmdh
>>225456669hippo
>>225456662reckon he could fall headfirst into a barrel of tits and come out sucking his thumb
im big gay
>>225456703this wouldve been all of us prior to his invention of course
>>225456692these were nice. better than micro chips
whoever invented the fanny did a really poor job of it
>>225456669Badger
>>225456723you don't know what the fuck you're talking about
ziedbelg spending hours every day searching for videos of black men having fun with their friends
>>225456754the thread image is meant for you
>>225456754>whoever invented the fannyyour parents lmao
>>225456777scr
Going to eat two tesco milk chocolate oaties
>>225456777bludgeoned him to deathyour e-fit on crimewatchhis tombstone reads "here lies fanny"
I’m 24 and never been employed inshallah this time next year I have a job and a wife
>>225456764he's right you're wrong
>>225456782would love to watch her wipe her arse
>>225456782>>225456796thanks for arousing us
if I was prime minister I would sentence all women to immediate prison INDEFINITELY !!
Any 'he who holdsthe Congolese cobra' man in
>>225456796I'm a stay at home son
i can't get a job because i've got mental health
cunny
>>225456692how do they stay crispy after being microwaved
>>225456800getting a job is easy
>>225456833haha based helpernonce post
raping a tray of lasagne
handing out copies of final fantasy 15 in the hood (gone zesty)
>>225456855Not in my position lol
I can't get mental health because I've got a job
wish i were a stay at home husband
>>225456861garfield
>>225456861evil garfield
>>225456861you'll end up with a cheesy bellend
morning, rorke. morning, leftypol.
I have a job and mental health and it's all a bit of a shit show honestly
>>225456889>>225456890
>>225456861andrew garfield
>>225456907evil ian: bad evening
>>225456907Good morning Mrs Trudeau
>>225456894been there done that got the dvd and the t shirt
>>225456861marquis de garfield
>>225456919Can I come over and watch the dvd? Maybe wear the t-shirt for a bit?
>>225456861garfield sobers
watch out ladies of sheffield
guys Gangbang me tonight at my house Be there
hope the new is a free sheldon edish
transforming like werewolf michael jackson in the thriller video from a regular everyday twat into a ultra mega twat
slept on my front last night and woke up looking like this
women at work are always coming up and leaning their tits on my desk
>>225456966Work at the midget farm do you?
>>225456946black hands typed out that image
>>225456915>>225456930>>225456945begging it
>>225456966maybe you have a magnet on your desk and they have metal tits
>>225456966me at the RSPB
>>225456946>t. when shy niggas finally build up the courage to message a girl
doing the garfield dance at 8888 mph
>>225456975no there's like a high shelf part of it and that's what they put their tits on
>>225456960looks like that german comedian with the weird eyes
big man has his own desk at work, no one makes him write on the floor and kicks over his pencil tins do they mr important man behind his very own desk
>>225456988driving the magnet truck from breaking bad up to a tattoo parlour and turning it on so all the hot alt women with piercings get stuck to it then speeding off into the sunset. heist of the century
Watch as left wing NUTTER is called out for OUTRAGEOUS Nigel Farage comment!
Why are women so evil lads
>>225457012back in my day vtubers weren't slags
>>225457018Sc
idgi whats be snapping
Lasagnacord out in force this afternoon I seeFucking freaks
john from garfield
Sir William Chapmanhttps://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c3ewegny45jvo
>>225457059You raviolicucks have got to just stop, it's pathetic.
the proberbial ummypops
what did he mean by this
>>225457076HE WRESTLED WITH A TIGER IS WHAT HE DIDHE TOLD IT STERNLY TO STOP BITING!IN THIS HOUSE WILLIAM CHAPMAN IS A HERO
arse wide shut
>>225457076wtf he mogs
Must return to sitting in front of work laptop and continue phoneposting for the next 3 hours
>>225457120doesn't mog a tiger though, eh? not a tiger?doesn't mog the tiger very much though, haha
>>225457099he wanted to shag the teddy
recycle>>225455260>>225455260>>225455260
>>225457099scmrg
test
