How fucked are we?
>>65200612Pretty fucked. They can just loiter and glass the planet from space while their fighters intercept any ballistic missiles we might somehow send their way.
>>65200612You literally cannot fight back, unless you manage to infiltrate the ship and sabotage its critical systems.It's like a US carrier group pulling up on an island nation that only has biplanes.
>>65200612We get to become part of the Galactic Empire.The survivors will anyways.
>>65200612Why are they here? What is their objective?If they're just going to chimp out and start blasting stuff, there isn't much we can do.Theu don't have the manpower to pull off a planetary invasion or occupation.Their sensors seem to be ass so we can probably sneak a 20megaton warhead in on an orbital maneuver.How long can they stay on station without resupply?
>>65200612They're probably lost as hell and extremely cut off from their supply lines with no hyperspace route home.Unless their CO wants to try to take earth as his fief at turbolaser point I think negotiation is probably where they'd go first. After all, they're not aliens. The empire are just a bunch of guys in funny outfits. They have no hyperspace maps of this galaxy and absolutely no idea if any other planets with intelligent life are nearby so glassing earth, likely even glassing every capital city would not be in their best interest.They would probably make whatever government they threw in with the global hyperpower though.
>>65200625>How long can they stay on station without resupply?Fuel/power?Indefinitely.Rations are probably dehydrated and molecular. Crew size is ~40k and some sources say they have hydoponic bays.They also could just send TIEs and Landing ships and forage.
Exactly as fucked as the script writer thinks we should be.
>>65200637>They have no hyperspace maps of this galaxyPretty sure an SD has the sensing and computing capability to create relatively short jump maps in uncharted space.
>>65200622We have this.
>>65200752
>>65200752No Asgard beams!
>>65200665As far as I know that's not how it works and hyperspace mapping is an extremely dangerous task.Even then they're just inchworming along blindly, hoping they blunder close enough to another intelligent star system to pick up their comms on sensors while their stores dwindle, morale decays and the chance of something important breaking increases.Genuinely, even with how rigid the empire is they'd be at risk of mutiny for doing anything but opening negotiations. Especially since earth is a planet of humans rather than disgusting ayy lmaos
>>65200612if they want to sit in orbit and fling boogers at cities then good for them they would probably get the UN to surrender but if they want to actually HOLD the planet then hooo boy. it would be like trying to knock down that hornet's nest in your shed by fucking it. Imagine Afghanistan, Ukraine, Vietnam and red dawn had a baby and the dad's are Osama Bin laden, Timothy McVeigh, Hanoi Hanna and Patty Hearst
>>65200800"and Patty Hearst."So, why include a richbitch coalburner?
>>65200813I couldn't think of a second girl :/
>>65200612Disney or EU?
>>65200800It's a lot easier to hold the global Vietnam when your local ally force is the entire US military.
>>65200661This is the correct answer. Otherwise I'm hoping to bribe the ship from the other Imperial Navy that also showed up.
>>65200818EU ofc
>>65200831Well then Earth is fucked.
>>65200797The Millenium Falcon can cobble bits together to do the Kessel run in under 12 parsecs. Which is a navigation feat of shortest possible routes around nonstationary gravitational bodies You mean to tell me that the Imperial equivalent of an Iowa does not have at least mediocre organic navigation equipment?
>>65200797>>65200844It is fair to presume they have quantum computers. They have droids. They have a staff that is multiple Divisions or a small Corps.I refuse to believe that should they find themselves in uncharted space they would be helpless, despite how the films may portray them as incompetent.
>>65200797>risk of mutinyRotate crew for R&R on landing craft. Encourage "non-consensual intercourse."All subjects to be disposed of before return.
>>65200612Are Will Smith and Jeff Goldblum still alive for this?
>>65200852>They have droids.Right at the start of Empire Strikes back their Star Destroyers are scouring the Galaxy with hyperspace capable probe droids to find a Rebel base, they also have scout ships like shuttles. I think they could map out a relatively safe lane between point A and point B provided our Galaxy isn't uniquely hazardous in some way. Couldn't do it forever unless those ships have a manufacturing center on board though... or they conscript locals to build it for them.
>>65200866>Take dictation>Read back, on screen>Comma here*, semicolon here*>Small screen for signature>Stow in ships logs, send multiple versions to High Command on varying channels, Advise senior NCOs, wait 3 hours and then general dissemination to full crew.
>>65200873We have the Kuiper and Asteroid belt but don't we see SDs tanking that with concern?And I assume the probe droids are because; An SD vould just LEO and scan your planet.But that would alert anyone there. Wven with stealth, you are going to notice a massive black hole where background should be.The question is why cannot a ship the size and power of an SD do active camo and project the signature of what is behind it?
>>65200765We don't need beams we have teleporters and nukes.
>>65200844Han was still working with a known hyperlane, an old and fairly well documented one at that. And luck played no small part in it.Navigating in wild space and the unknown region is explicitly seen as extremely dangerous to nigh impossible. Surveying it and establishing hyperlanes is slow and expensive process.Most of the Galaxy's hyperlanes are ancient at this point and required long eras of peace and prosperity to build up >>65200852It's not imperial incompetence, without even a basic map it's like walking into a minefield
IMPERIAL HOLONET BROADCAST: THE TRUTH THE REBELS DON’T WANT YOU TO HEARCITIZENS OF THE GALAXY – STAND WITH ORDER!For too long, the corrupt Old Republic let weakness, bureaucracy, and radical “progress” tear our galaxy apart. Senators bickered while pirates, smugglers, and Jedi mystics ran wild. Crime skyrocketed. Economies collapsed. Planets begged for protection.Then the EMPIRE rose – the strong, disciplined, conservative force that saved civilization.We stand for the timeless values that built greatness:Law and Order – No more chaos in the streets. Stormtroopers keep the peace so you can raise your family in safety.Strength Through Unity – One Emperor. One military. One galactic standard. Borders secured. Trade routes protected. No more open borders for Hutt cartels and Separatist scum.Traditional Galactic Values – Family, duty, merit, and self-reliance. Hard work for the Empire earns you prosperity – not handouts from some socialist “Senate.”Peace Through Superior Firepower – The Death Star wasn’t a weapon of terror; it was the ultimate deterrent against anarchy. A shield for every loyal world.Under Emperor Palpatine’s visionary leadership, we ended the Clone Wars, crushed corruption, and delivered two decades of unmatched stability. Trade booms. Planets prosper. The right-wing way works.Now look at the so-called “Rebel Alliance” – a left-wing terrorist network hell-bent on dragging us back into darkness:
>>65201049Radical Revolutionaries: These are not “freedom fighters.” They are Marxist-style insurgents funded by shadowy elites on Mon Cala and Corellia. Their goal? Tear down everything we built and replace it with their utopian “New Republic” – code for endless committees, wealth redistribution, and Jedi superstition ruling from the shadows.Terrorist Tactics: They blow up Imperial star destroyers with suicide runs. They assassinate loyal governors. They hide weapons on peaceful worlds like Alderaan, then scream “genocide” when we neutralize the threat. Classic left-wing playbook: create chaos, then cry victim.Unchecked Crime: Take the Wookiees of Kashyyyk – these brutish, fur-covered beasts are notorious for their primal rages and unprovoked attacks on civilized beings. Under the weak Republic, they roamed unchecked, tearing limbs from anyone who crossed their feral paths. The Empire wisely integrated them into productive labor details, channeling their raw aggression into building our grand infrastructure. Without firm Imperial guidance, these violent animals would revert to savagery, endangering us all. Yet the Rebels stir them up, turning them loose as weapons in their chaotic crusade.Hypocritical Elites: Princess Leia Organa – spoiled royal playing revolutionary. Luke Skywalker – farm boy radicalized by a washed-up mystic cult. Han Solo – smuggler turned useful idiot. They preach “equality” while their leaders live in luxury and send wave after wave of brainwashed youths to die for their cause.Attacks on Civilization: They destroyed the Death Star – a $200 quadrillion peace project that would have ended all major wars – killing millions of honest Imperial workers and soldiers in the process. That wasn’t heroism. That was mass murder by left-wing extremists who would rather rule ruins than live in order.
>>65201050The Rebels aren’t liberating anyone. They’re destroying the galaxy’s best hope. They recruit with slogans like “Hope” and “Freedom,” but deliver only bombings, blockades, and bankruptcy. Every “victory” they celebrate leaves planets poorer, crime higher, and families mourning.The Empire is the right-wing bulwark against left-wing terrorism.We built the future. They want to burn it down.JOIN THE EMPIRE TODAYEnlist. Report rebel sympathizers. Buy Imperial bonds.Peace. Order. Prosperity.LONG LIVE THE EMPEROR!THE REBELLION WILL BE CRUSHED.This message approved by the Imperial Ministry of Truth and Security. Dissent is treason.
>>65200612Se simply send our own Thai fighters
THE CONFEDERACY WILL RISE AGAIN
>>65200612Threaten to destroy the Galactic Empire with a demographic nuke consisting of 1 billion jeet migrants if they don't lift the blockade. Even if they base delta zero Earth they can't possibly kill all of them, nothing short of the Death Star would do that.
>>65200885>We have the Kuiper and Asteroid belt but don't we see SDs tanking that with concern?The ISD that tanks an asteroid to the bridge just straight up dies, it's just no one else gave a shit because they're villains. Of course the asteroid belt and Kuiper belt aren't nearly as dense as movie equivalents. You could jump through either one completely blind and have a good shot at not hitting anything.
>>65201053We're going to hang stormtrooper helmets over our fireplaces when this is done
>>65200612utterly and mercilessly completely stuff fucked. There would be literally nothing we could do....Unless they went completely retarded due to plot reasons.
>>65201053Who remembers that time The Emperor's right hand man chopped up a bunch of children with a laser sword? I remember.
>>65200625> If they're just going to chimp out and start blasting stuff, there isn't much we can do.Pretty much>Theu don't have the manpower to pull off a planetary invasion or occupation.You assume a whole lot of loyalty living in the hearts of most of the planet. Most governments have the begrudging tolerance of their people, not their loyalty. Especially ones with a very loose national identity. >Their sensors seem to be ass so we can probably sneak a 20megaton warhead in on an orbital maneuver.Canonically able to scan unshileded ships. We can't begin to understand that. And we have nothing even remotely capable of mimicking their shields or even their repulsor technology. >How long can they stay on station without resupply?Who says they won't get resupplied? They can take out every sensor we could deploy or build from orbit, so radar is gone, satellite comms are down as soon as their tractor beams go online, their droids are probably hacking whatever the hell is left of our communications grid. They can easily land on any of a thousand remote spots to resupply anything they want. Except fuel. I'm not too up to date on what Ships use for fuel in the SW Disney verse.
>>65200612*sigh* Again, ANY civ. that has the means to easily cross the Void will have no issue whatsoever re-Hadean Earths surface.
>>65200625>Theu don't have the manpower to pull off a planetary invasion or occupationLets say for arguments sake, they take a tiny sample of their advanced tech and touch down on, say, New Zealand. Now, normally, if it was an invasion, They might have just declared war on the whole damn commonwealth. But these guys are zipping around space like nothing. A trip to the asteroid belt can potentially yield a few thousand pounds of gold. And we're a primitive backwater.One or maybe two of our nations would qualify as a 3rd world shithole to them, barely livable if you don't mind roughing it and are really into "rustic" living. We covet a bunch of shiny rocks. We kill people for shiny rocks. They can get a lot of shiny rocks. Why not give the NZ parliament some shiny rocks? A whole lot of them. Enough to, not purchase the country, that would be too vulgar, but secure your captain as the new Grand Minister for life. Voted on by the HoR 122 to 1. Now, there might be some resistance, yes, they might get called traitors, yes. But the Imperials have 2 things, thousands more years of collective political and economic theory and motherfucking space ships. If they make NZ good, and I mean, fucking GOOD....Do you really think we're ALL going to be lining up behind the assholes in our respective capitals telling us how good they are running the show when we see fucking Auckland getting a glow up that makes NYC look like New Delhi?
>>65200612What do they want? If it's to rule, we might be better off with them over the clown show of the present.
>>65201571A bigger stage does not mean a better performance.
>>65201571If it's just some imperial navy captain stuck in this galaxy with his surface action group it might be better, if somehow the galactic empire is dragging it's entire ass all the way from far far away it could be significantly worse.That said, we're still humans and the empire is into that kind of thing.It'd probably get a lot of scientific interest on what humans are doing way out here. Then they'd find out about George Lucas and shit would get weird
>>65200612stupid premiselet me spice it up a littleAbout two minutes after the Imperial battlegroup arrives in orbit, a Lucrehulk and two Providence-class CIS warships arrive as well.Both groups ask to contact "the leader of the Earthlings" and offer to induct the planet into the Republic and Confederacy respectively.Both of them say Earth will be better off with their side, don't trust the other.What happens?
>>65200625>>65201571This isn't the Empire. It's just another rogue moff Penis Galactus from another Imperial remnant who happened to discover an unknown inhabited system during his explorations.
>>65201732If it's just a rando warlord and not one of the big remnant factions, he doesn't have nearly enough resources for occupation of a planet as populated and developed as Earth and those three star destroyers might actually be everything he has. Counterinsurgency on a comparatively heavily armed planet with 7-8 billion people would ruin any small faction in Star Wars. As long as we avoid an orbital bombardment, whether by preemptively killing them or through diplomacy, it should be fine. >>65200625>Their sensors seem to be ass so we can probably sneak a 20megaton warhead in on an orbital maneuver.More like a couple dozen several megaton bombs per star destroyer. Power scaling in Star Wars is wildly inconsistent and it's better not to take any chances.
>>65201053On one hand, the Empire were a bunch of oppressive dicks that openly murdered the humans on the rim they claimed to be helping en-masse.On the other hand, the New Republic was just the last dying grasp of the incompetent old one screaming at the wind "I'M STILL IN CHARGE" instead of trying to fix the corruption that made it fall to begin with, banking on everyone replacing critical thought and their continued hardship with "Empire bad, m'kay," hoping that switching the house of the senate to the other core worlds every once and a while might fool anyone in the mid and outer rim into believing they'd get anything out of this arrangement.
>>65200815>I am forgotten
Do we even have a chance in a ground warfare?
>>65201862>corruptionAre you taking Darth Tyranus at his word again? cause if you are, I've got a bag of immortality to sell you too
>>65200612Completely. They're going blast us from space and we have no hope of doing anything but token damage, likely with shit tier missiles that scratch the paint.But we're going to close the strait to the moon, so we won completely and utterly.
>>65200612literally just fly rockets with nuclear warheads at them
>>65200622does that island have nuclear missiles?
>>65201954I wouldn't worry about it.
This is a retarded thread
>>65200612>ATTENTION PEOPLE OF EARTH, SURRENDER TO OUR IMPERIAL MIGHT>*Fuckhuge battle.mp4*>Admiral DeathEvil, the earth people continue to resist us, perhaps we can offer something that will make then submit?>Great idea captain MurderObliterator, have we obtained any information on what they might want?>Well there is a small race of humans on the planet, the 'jews' which appear to be hated amongst all peoples yet they control the primary banking, media and political structures of every nation>ATTENTION PEOPLES OF EARTH, JOIN US AND WE WILL DESTROY THE JEWS ONCE AND FOR ALL>Fighting stops immediately, 99% of the planet defects to the imperials overnight, israel obliterated
>>65200612> ATTENTION ALL PLANETS OF THE SOLAR FEDERATION! ATTENTION ALL PLANETS OF THE SOLAR FEDERATION! WE HAVE ASSUMED CONTROL! WE HAVE ASSUMED CONTROL!
>>65200618Three THOUSAND star destroyers couldn't "glass" a planet you faggot, go back to whatever sci fi forum spat you out.>>65200622>>65200623>>65200625>>65200657They would run out of food before they achieved anything other than fulfilling the dreams of every decent human being by burning down a few cities.
>>65201307They deserved it and you're a commie if you disagree.You're not a commie, are you?
>>65201989>just like Jesus taught
So does Earth in this scenario know what Star Wars is? Because that would make things very awkward.
just send in the space shuttle with the m2 browning door gunner (can't find pic, I have failed you all)
>>65200622Yeah but according to browns when they manage to not be exterminated after being repeatedly bombed with zero retaliation, this apparently counts as winning. So I think we could win.
>>65200612>1 Imp SSD vs 2 Rep SSDWe're only fucked the moment we run out of popcorn. Watch the fuckers blow each other apart in low earth orbit.
>>65202017>Three THOUSAND star destroyers couldn't "glass" a planetWrong.>run out of foodIdiot take.>muh burning cities is actually a good thingAh, you're one of those absolute subhuman retards.
>>65200800Given how Imperials roll? They'll just solve the problem of occupying a planet of 8 billion people by turning it into a planet of like 1-2 billion shell-shocked survivors sitting in effectively large-scale concentration camps. No people, no problem.
>>65201204>a demographic nuke consisting of 1 billion jeet migrantsYou could import a billion jeets to Coruscant and nobody would ever notice a difference.
>>65202086Mid-Clone Wars Republic is effectively the Empire before taking off the mask.
>>65201954No, we have absolutely nothing to compare to Star Wars tech, even 1st world infantry would get absolutely bodied by stormtroopers, they're basically supersoldiers. We're used to seeing them get mowed down by blasters, because their armor can't handle direct hits from blaster bolts. But at the same time it's impossible to kill a stormtrooper with bullets unless it hits the body glove or eye lenses. Also their armor provides excellent protection against explosions and fragments, they're immune to biological and chemical weapons due to their built in filters, they can operate comfortably in all extreme environmental conditions, their helmets have built in HUDs with motion sensors and environmental data and targeting diagnostics, snd their vision is immune to darkness and glare and smoke. Plus their weapons can fire hundreds of shots before needing to be reloaded, and blaster bolts are unaffected by gravity or wind or other environmental conditions.
>>65202110Ewoks.
>>65201954>sloppaMost military ground forces in Star Wars, with the exception of actually competent special forces units, have mediocre to dogshit equipment, tactics, doctrine, composition, etc. Even the Stormtrooper Corps or Clone troopers, above average by the standard of infantry forces in Star Wars, kind of suck compared to modern infantry. Also, contemporary weapons like firearms are consistently depicted as effective in Star Wars visual media like games, comics, and film, and sometimes effective in literature. While the Galactic Empire, Republic, NR, CIS, etc. could feasibly field a planetary invasion force with the quality or quantity to successfully occupy Earth, it's not like a fleet of 1 ISD and 2 Venators can do that. >>65202096That's what we want them to think. Jeets are a slow acting demographic poison on highly populated core worlds, where they can fly under the radar and multiply, take over and enshittify public and private institutions, and bring absolute ruin to public sanitation and safety, which will only become apparent decades or centuries later, by which time it will be too late. Also, there's plenty of economically and politically important outer rim and even mid rim worlds that have tiny populations that would be instantly nuked by a large influx of jeets.
>>65202123Something something the will of the force/children's movie
>>65202110>But at the same time it's impossible to kill a stormtrooper with bullets unless it hits the body glove or eye lenses.Stormtrooper armor is decent but not that good, that claim isn't actually consistent with what see or read in Star Wars media. Various different factions, including the Empire and Rebels, make use of slugthrowers without much issue. That one side charging pump shotgun also seems ubiquitous even among groups that can acquire blasters, and IIRC is capable of killing people pretty easily both in lore and in video games. Arrows and blunt force trauma have also been shown to incapacitate or kill stormtroopers through their armor. Also, Imperial Army and Navy ground troops don't have as much armor coverage as Stormtroopers.
>>65202151So what saying if we hit them hard enough with say a brick they'll turn to paste?
>>65202061Sounds like a fantastic bargaining chip.If they all resist zero-summing we can give them the intelligence coup of the millennium. The ISB is going to cum.
>>65202171We could also offer them Kathleen Kennedy as our superweapon. Death Star might destroy planets but she'll destroy an entire universe!
>>65202093They did tend to treat humans better and sometimes even waited until there was a civil war so that they could intervene as a liberator.
>>65200612Difficult part would be figuring out how to board and capture one of those destroyers to reverse engineer the tech
>>65201327*sigh* Again, ANY civ. that has a reason to cross the Void will is going to want the planet intact.
>>65202313System
>>65200612A single Imperial can glass earth from orbit and its shields are stronger than any nuke ever made, so very fucked as we have no defenses against it.
Why is there so many Star Wars threads being spammed on /k/ at the moment?
>>65202349Because it is a staple of the board.
The ISD could just rain down megawatts of hate and outside of nook spam theres not much we could do. Im sure an ISD has radiation shielding so nukes are gonna have to transfer enough thermal energy into the ship, which likely can handle near star orbits.
>>65201571Imperials are communist so probably not
>>65202376Imperials are "The Man". Theyre tight fisted in some areas and loose in others, whatever gives them control.
>>65200820I always find it funny when people try to compare the IOM navy with the Galactic Empires navy. There's no comparison, the GE's maximum engagement range starts inside the point defence range of IOM vessels, IOM ships are faster, have actual armour, better guns, shields that work against more than just blasters, actual flak capability, etc. Its not a contest, a Dauntless could probably solo a squadron of large Star Destroyers on its own.
>>65202405GE gets a Deathstar then, just remember the Deathstar is still able to zip around and just pop into turbolaser range of enemy fleets. The GE would fleetmog the Imperium of man simply because they could do eldar Webway tier bullshit as well, the Imperium cant quickly warp around at a tactical level.
>>65202405Star Wars has faster FTL and a much higher population. Good chance they could swarm them.
>>65202430I font know about faster, but it is definitely more reliable seeing as it doesn't take a shortcut through Hell.
>>65200612>the universe now runs on SW physicsI guess some japanese 5th graders wake up and realize they have the Force and end up saving us.>the universe continues to run on our physicsThe ships weren't in proper orbit because they normally rely on their antigrav, they fall into ocean.Or they overheat due to lack of sufficient cooling surfaces.Or they explode like a because hypermatter reactors are just uncontainable exotic particle soup (in which case we're very fucked)
On a side note I once read a sci fi short story (which I cannot find again). Basically a fleet commander was being on trial for failure.He failed to occupy a planet. The inhibitants were always at war with each other, very violent, millions dead, too. so it sounded easy but for some reason they stopped killing each other and then they got their hands on some star tech and started reverse engineering stuff and slowly but surely rebelled and it took them a while and lots of casualties but they repelled the fleet.So he gets demoted and discharged and on his way out meets a fellow commander friend who asks what his plans are and where he is going. Answer is they call their planet esrth and he is going as far as he can because they swore revenge and they are coming…
>>65203710Sounds like HFY slop.
>>65203710sounds like a classic post-WW2 SF story
