you fall into a tiger enclosure and only have the weapons that are currently in arm's reachhow fucked are you?
>>65577842I've got an SRK, an axe, a collapsing baton, a machete, a drawer full of pocket knives, a can of mace and an M&P. Probably alright.
I have an hk45c on my desk. I might be alright.
>>65577842>AR-15I'm good
>>65577842Can I lean to reach it?
>>65577903no leaning
>>65577842I'd kill it with a hammer because I'm not a retard who turns his back on a beast
Did he scold the tiger into stopping?
>>65577842So was he drunk or mentally fucked?
>>65577939Probably some schizo or a retard.
>>65577842Within arms reach I have a makarov, a USP .45 Tactical, a 1911, and an SR-15.I think I'll be okay actually, assuming I have any time at all before it just mauls me.
>>65577940Got it confirmed on Instagram just a couple of minutes ago while I was taking a shit: it was a deaf retard.
>>65577933he's british
>>65577960Those guys scream real good
does pspsps work on tigers?
>>65577933>>65577960Did he died?
>>65577991Yes.
>>65577989Yep. They like a scruff too.Not tried a belly rub yet.
>>65577992Poor tiger.
>>65577842>20 rounds of +p 124grain HSTI feel comfy. My pen now.
>>A witness claimed the man, who had a mobile phone and was wearing Apple Airpods, appeared to “psyche himself up” by doing a “dance” in the spectator area before entering the enclosure.I genuinely hate autists. They arent endearing, they stink like shit/piss, and they cause problems like this.
>>65578008Do autist stim when they die?
>>65577842I have a handgun, I'm fucked even if there's only one tiger.
Gonna go gladiator style on those bitch ass housecats
>>65578098Forgot pic
>>65577842>five seven and a khyber knifeIt could go either way but no matter who wins, it's going to make for a great news article.
>>65578019Unless you have a .22 derringer you should be fine.
>>65577923Damn, LC380, not the best, better than nothin.
>>65578151idk man. tigers are pretty big and tough.
New haven model winchester 1300 18.5 with a tube of flitecontrol 00. I mean it could be much worse. Oh and a g19 and some HSTs. I'd probably still want out though
If its any domesticated a hard smack to its head would make it fuck off
>>65578135I need you to put on some jorts and a cowboy hat, immediately. 5.7 fags have an aura to maintain.
>>65577842Aww, kitty wants to play!
>>65577842I circle around to the back, climb up on the deck, and wait for the TC to pop out of his hatch and look around.
>>65578135Is your knife strapped to your table leg?
>activate camouflage>leave hologram decoy to distract the kittytoo easy...
>he used the word 'weapon' in the OP, that magically makes the thread on topic
>>65577842keep in mind the enclosure is in the UK so you may not have a firearm or knoife larger than a butter.
>>65577842USP 45 Elite loaded with 255gr flat nosed hardcast .45 supers that chrono at 1220fps at 10 feet from the muzzle. I'll be alright if the fall doesn't stun me and give kitty an advantage.
>>65577984Yup. I fucked one up the ass with a mop handle once. They sure do screech and holler.
>>65577842Is there a full video up?
>>65577842>suppressed glock 19 with a dotI might die, but at least I won't damage anyone's hearing.
>>65577842I have a large box of Churu and a smoke grenade.I think I'll be fine.
>>65578008>was wearing Apple Airpods, appeared to “psyche himself up” by doing a “dance” in the spectator area before entering the enclosureIf he was listening to this he's a based retard.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=btPJPFnesV4
>>65578933
>Spambot posts off topic trending video from twitter>Mods leave it up until the bump limit What the fuck is the point of this site anymore?
its dull aswell...
>>65577933I think even the tiger sensed there is something very wrong with that guy
>>65577842>A mere pocket knifeI use my immense experience with house cats to make the tiger love me selflessly.
>>65578995>What the fuck is the point of this site anymore?It's where redditors go to wait out their bans
>>65578995>>Mods leave it up until the bump limitboard would be even deader otherwise.
>>65579133It would be a worthwhile trade
>>65577842would you rather 1v1 a tiger or a crocodile?
>>655778424 pills of cialis. Them tigers are fucked.
>>65579158Crocodile easily. Even in water. Fighting a fully grown tiger is probably more suicidal than fighting a grizzly
>>65577997Tiger is okay. They're not gonna kill it for clawing some retard to death
>>65577842A Glock 19 gen 5 with a 15+2 magazine of 124gr hollow point and a Chinesium dagger. At least I can kill myself before the tigers do.
>>655778428inch ak. I'm good
>>65577842The tiger didn't like it when he turned around and looked straight at it and yelled. Reminds me of how people wear a mask facing backwards on their heads to discourage tigers from attacking. Or was it leopards?
>>65579267They both have the instinct of pouncing on prey with back towards them. Tiger themselves have those little eyespots on their ears to dissuade others from attacking from behind.
>>65579286Talk about watching your back!
9mm pistol on the nightstand and a 12 gauge leaning up against the headboard. If I lean over just a bit, within arms reach is also an ar15 and mp5. To the nightstand on my right is an onahole and a bottle of lube if I want to subdue the tiger another way. But that is a little further considering I'm on the left side of the bed.
>>65577842In the bathroom so I’ve got a Taurus G2C with 12rds of 115gr FMJ. It would kill a tiger, but it might get me first, then bleed out.
What else does this remind you of /k/?
>>65579158Croc every time. Unless you make some gay situation like swimming in the middle of a river
>>65579158crocodile, at least I can outrun it or jump on its back and do a steve irwin impression before dying
>>65577842Is it me or is that a very respectful and polite tiger>"oh my apologies, did that neck bite hurt?"
>>65579433lmao what a fag
>>65579473It really just looks like it’s playing rough. This is not a tiger attack.
>>65579500I wouldn't even say it's particularly rough, just even gentle tiger play will fucking kill you
>>65579433>story about a tiger>still finds a way to crowbar shilling for russia into itMan fuck Alex Jones.
>>65579473It lives in a zoo, its not like its truly wild. Its probably more stressed out that this loud retard was in its space and is confused how to deal with such an unusual situation>>65579526Yeah even if it wasn't trying to actively kill him people are easily injured by shit like bears and tigers playing in a friendly manner.
>>65579527>Just by tolerating behavior of his NATOStates this is something that always makes me laugh about russians, they have this built in master-slave mindset the idea of having allies who are on even terms with you is completely alien to them, all they understand is violence and bossing around those who they perceive as weaker than them
$400 Turkish 1911 loaded with range reload 230 grain copper plated lead round nose. Seeing that it has never failed to feed, fire, or hit the target… I’m dead but that’s my fault not the guns.
Tiger.Tiger.Tiger.
>>65579527wow heidecker's not looking too good
>>65577842Well I have some homo to my left and a G3 to my right. I think I'm pretty well prepared for a tiger attack
>>65579658That tiger will be eating you by the time you reach for that pistol
>>65577842We should do this to all autists
>>65579702I don't want to stress out a poor caged tiger though.
Show it tiger furry porn
>>65579711This. I feel like hippos would serve as better retard mulchers
>>65578533go jump into a tiger enclosure :^)
>>65579664Heidecker died, he was eating a cheeseburger in his car and POPPED like a water balloon!
>cheap AKMS I mean, it would definitely hurt them, but I dunno if it would kill straight away unless I magdumped.
>>65577842>how fucked are you?It will be absolute kino as I align my sights with his eyes.
>>65578382Rolling computer desk, but yeah.>>65578995A Ukraine thread died for this. Many such cases.
>>65577939deaf and severely autistic
>>65579748Do you think mammals are bulletproof or what?
>>65577842>grosmesser within arms reach>uzi slightly too far awayfugg
>>65579286From behind these dick heads look like a coyote in dim light.
>>65579158depends on the crocodile
>>65579886That rabbit looks like he's on meth
>>65577842>ruger rxm with cheap 124gr blazer hollowpointscould be worse desu>>65578008>>65579049>tfw even the tiger knew tards are fucking weird
>>65579868we're talking about one of the largest apex predators here. people hunt them with no less than a 30-06. they're notoriously hard to kill with smaller calibers
>>65577851all collecting dust, but at least you keep your dildos nice and shiny
>>65579927They basically are meth: the animal
>>65577842>canned mforgery with 28 tbbc 1500 lumens and a dotOr>my cockThats a hard, turgid choice.
>>65579527Why the fuck is this mutant so goddamn red?
>>65580031high blood pressure or alcoholism, or both
>>65580006The ones living in my backyard just look like cute bunnies, I'm guessing different species
>>65580006>hyperactive >skittish>insatiably horny>a hair's breadth from cardiovascular eventFuck how 6 actually kind of right.
>>65577842replace the tiger with a dozen crazy orange cats.how fucked are you now?
>>65580063>i can fix her
>>65577842>1911 .45>couple of knivesI'll be fine.
>>65580044
>>65579886>look like a coyote in dim light.Get an eye exam and get some glasses, son.
>>65580089Just imagining the faggots on the left getting rounded up and clubbed to death by the thousands makes me happy. Just imagining the fren on the right makes me happy.
>>65577842Duct tape. It's a cat. Make a square out of tape and watch it sit in it.
>>65580089
>>65579868Anon, this isn't a rabbit.I wouldn't take an AK bear hunting, even though I'd certainly be able kill a bear with one. It takes too many shots to kill the animal humanely or quickly enough to get me out of immediate danger if the it is close.Tigers are hovering around the same ballpark in terms of weight and size, and they're also more keen to actively, intentionally hunt you well outside of the austerity measures that coerce bears into man-eating.
>>65577933Yes
>>65580716Apparently, the tiger got tired of being scolded and devoured Nigel a few moments later.
>>65580716>tfw a human points at you
>>65580076Awwww
>>65580063Okay, before this thread gets nuked any /an/ experts want to explain why the cat went 'relentless kill mode' on the guy?
>>65580818It's a tiger, if you put prey in front of them they're going to kill it. They are the most prey driven mammal next to polar bears. The only reason why it didnt crunch the retard's neck instantly is because it was raised in captivity and wasnt sure what to do.
>>65580829That doesn't look like a baby tiger in the video though.
>>65580833Correct, that's not a cub, that tiger was an adolescent. Regardless, they're built to kill or practice killing prey.
>>65580843You do realize I'm talking about this video, >>65580063 right?
>>65580818I reckon its a couple of things, cat hate high pitched noises so I wonder if the fridge was making some noise being dragged across the tiles. And, some cats are really fucking weird about territory, so they respond weirdly when things get mixed up.Being they're also asians, they tend to eat cats
>>65580716Poor tiger. Sure it was killing him, but he didn't have to be so mean about it.
>>65579957>>65580670>https://www.ammoland.com/2023/11/handgun-defenses-against-bears-170-documented-incidents-98-effective/Read this. You hunt with larger calibers for quick, clean kills and for not ruining the meat or hide. If you want a tiger skinned rug you don’t shoot it 10 times. Niggers its still made of flesh and blood and 7.62x39 passes clean through. A few shots and it’s down. I bet neither of you have even killed a deer.
>>65579158Land or water? Fresh water or salty?I lived in NT Australia for awhile and saw horses torn in half by salties, their legs would get stuck in the mud when the croc grabbed them and the croc would pull and roll until they spilt at the bottom of the rib cage.
>>65578008autists don't do this lol, normies who want attention do.
>>65580923I think a lot of people get mixed up with little alligators being the same as crocodiles. Big crocodiles are the weight of a small car and just don't give a fuck about anything, have a brain the size of a walnut and anything smaller than them is food. They're also able to run faster on land than people can
>OPI pick you up and throw you at the tiger for being a 5'2 shitskin spammer
>>65579433>randomly starts spamming his russia metoditchka while talking about some random dude going into a tiger enclosureit's so embarrassing how these retards think the "russian bear" is still alive and not a joke.
>>65580063the only difference between tigers and cats is when a cat goes into this mode it makes for a funny animal video and when a tiger goes into this mode it turns into a liveleak video.
>>65580917This anon is going to get beaten to death by a nog because he didn't have enough stopping power.
>>65580933I don't think it's possible to kill a salty with your bare hands, you couldn't choak it hard enough for it to notice and if you did you need to hold it for 2 hours.At least with a tiger if you get a good choak on it you could maybe kill it.
>>65580946>choak
>>65580949I'm very stupid and not a vampire that forgets the new spelling of words.
>>65580044Residential cottontails and wild jackrabbits are night and day different.
>>65580829Don’t get pissed at the polar bear. He’s just telling you to not jack it so often
>>65580941>implying my two world wars isn’t enoughMy African coon patrol speaks for itself even it is only a pistol
>>65579527How is it possible for Dugin to post anything online without getting spammed with pictures of himself right after Dugina got turned into a flaming onahole.
>>65580063>>65580076Ginger cats are absolute spergs. Mine is like a million years old and will alternate between smacking my kid for no reason whatsoever or jumping from the ground up onto my shoulder while I am standing and then squawking like a god damn parrot on a pirate.
>>65577842>4.5 inch barrel AR-15 with PDW stockI'm fine, anon. Just fine.
>>65580962Ceilingbear is watching you goon.
>>65580946I think you'd potentially have more chance of fist fighting a large tree than a large croc. They're just all thick skin, osseodermal armour plates and lizard brain that doesn't really register damage or much e lse..The other thing about large cats though, they're really fucking strong animals with both the bites and claws being absolutely devastating, large dogs are kind of scary when they want to be, but I'd be really wary around any kind of cat that's around say 20-25kg or 45lb. They might not kill you, but there's not a zero sum chance that if things got really heated that they might kill you as well. If you're not dead, you might not enjoy being alive either.
>>65581000Kinda crazy he's still online anywhere after that.Or he's just one of them double-down dumb-cunts that think any kind of attention is good
>>65580063Cat must be 1/8 pitbull or something, got triggered and went into "I must kill" mode
>>65580818Cats aren't domesticated, with dogs we selectively breed them until we got a chill buddy but with cats they just hung around to kill the mice attracted by our grain stores and we let them because it was good for us too.Even today there hasn't been hundreds of years of selective breeding so they are mostly a wild animal that hangs out with us for food.
>>65581045Not totally true, there are numerous breeds of cat out there that were bred for human companionship, Ragdoll and Burmese being two I can think of
>>65581082>Ragdoll created in the 1960s>Burmese created in the 1930sI get your point and we have started selectively breeding cats but as I said it hasn't been very long at all compared to ~10,000 years for dogs.
>>65580917>A few shots and it’s downThat's the problem: Will I be able to make those few shots consecutively in quick enough succession before this thing rips my neck open?A lot of it comes down to me not pussying out, focusing, and being practiced enough to able to hit shit, but even with those factors taken care of, we're talking about a relatively small, closed-in space and a very fast, agile target. I have a very small window to get my shots in before it closes the distance to my jugular. That's the problem.Most likely outcome is, it dies with my trachea in its mouth as we both bleed to death.
>>65581298nice dong bro
>>65581298Wtf is this faux wood airsoft shit.
>>65577842>My penorWelp time to breed the tigress.But seriously, what would happen if you show a Tiger your cock?
>>65577842>browsing in the bathroom>have to defend myself with toilet paperThis is what I get for literally shit posting.
>>65581304It would laugh.
>>65581329>It would laugh.Why?? That's disrespectfull as shiii.. bro.
>>65581336Tigers don't understand respect, they only understand fear.
tiger are wild man
>>65581341>they only understand fear.And they dont fear my cock, lmao. That is quite impressive to be honest.
>>65580818apartment cats that arent allowed outside are all mentally deranged in some way. they arent meant to be inside all the time.
>>65581301thx>>65581302>faux wood airsoft???None of the wood is fake nor is the gun airsoft, but okay
>>65579286Neat
>>65578008Maybe he streamed the whole thing somewhere..Cat will not be killed, reports say. Good.
>>65577842>Dude points his finger at its face like "I'M FUCKING WARNING YOU">It actually stops
>>65581460Big cats have really strong prey drive but are also really careful, like any cat. They see something that looks helpless, they'll attack. They see something that they thought was helpless turn around and get in their face mad about it, they literally have a "hol' up" moment
>>65581298>Will I be able to make those few shots consecutively in quick enough successionSkill issue. Seriously though, it’s a valid concern but I’m responding to posts that make it sound like a tiger can tank rifle rounds. That’s laughable untrue. Also like the bear defense with handgun article shows, animals hate getting shot. Bullets hurt. A lot of those were grizzly and brown bears which are every bit as big and fast as a tiger. If people can do it with a pistol, you shouldn’t have any trouble with a rifle.
>>65581319>he doesn’t have a shitter gunGit gud scrub
>>65581558Yeah, what if someone breaks into your house while you're pooin', pooin', all day long?
>>65581460>>65581464Yeah, predators have to be careful too, one target they thought was easy prey turning around and going for them can result in a possibly crippling injury and lingering death.
>>65579433T I G E R S
>>65579527Damn Pawn Stars owner looks rough after a years
>>65581045Cats are absolutely domesticated, just not as companion animals. A population of Felis lybica were domesticated into Felis domesticus by the Cult of Bastet beginning about 3600 years ago. They were not domesticated for pest control or companionship, they were domesticated to be economical to raise and fecund so that the Cult of Bastet could affordably sell cat mummies to worshipers of Bastet as votive sacrifices. They bred millions of cats for this purpose for about 1800 years and the Cult of Bastet and Felis domesticus were both exported from Egypt to the reach of the known world by the Alexandrine Greeks and the Roman Empire.They have smaller brains, larger litters, shorter gestation, earlier sexual maturity, more gregarious social lives, lower caloric need, and less defensive behavior than the wild stock Felis lybica they are descended from, which is exactly what you need if you want to mass produce cat mummies to the point that the 19th century Europeans could export literally thousands of tons of cat mummies for use as phosphate fertilizer.It’s why the generic domestic shorthairs are less predicable than dogs, they’re essentially livestock we keep as pets, rather than being bred to be companion animals. You need a specialty breed that was actually bred to be a companion animal if you want to avoid this.
>be security guard>nearest weapons are my duty gun, my duty baton, and my personal knife>fall into tiger enclosure>throw back out because I only lift to fill out my uniform>draw duty gun, pulls a bunch of kydex out with it because cheap fucking holster>ready my personal knife>tiger swipes at my vest, ripping through it and into my spleen>shove baton up my ass while I bleed out
I got a beretta 80x, 10 rounds of 95 gr jacketed ball ammo on my desk. Might be enough, maybe. depends on how hard I shit my pants when I got a tiger bearing down on me.
>>65581570even just losing an eye as a predator is insanely dangerous, which is why many predators are rather cautious around prey that fights back.this is all thrown out the window when the tiger is really REALLY hungry btw.
>>65578223Cats are pussies
>>65582004audibly kek'd
>>65577842>tiger looks away from the tard at 0:16Amateur hour, turning your head on a combatant like that. Tigger is lucky he survived.
>>65580829Tigers don't normal prey on humans, you're talking rubbish. >>65580818The causes for tigers killing typically tend to be territorial, because they were disturbed, they think you're going to attack it or steal its food, or a mother guarding her cubs. The "man-eating tiger" is rare, its tends to happen because the tiger in question can't go after its normal prey for some reason (ie because its in bad health and/or old), and a human in a tigers territory is a fairly easy target (even though they won't generally attack humans unless they have a surprise advantage). The problem is they get a taste for humans after that. As far as I am aware the tiger that killed didn't eat him, and there's no reason it should have, and the fact they are saying it won't be euthanised would suggest that. If it had I suspect they would.
>>65580818Isn't it obvious? If someone shoved a fridge into you, making you dodge it repeatedly, you would be pretty pissed off too.
>>65577992Prove it
>>65582332https://www.bbc.com/news/articles/c6n9r3n7858zo
>>65582128Where the fuck did i say they do? I said they are incredibly prey driven demonstrated by the fact they attack humans more than any other land mammal. Tigers are far more aggressive toward people than any other big cat.>oh they dont hunt humansMore than fucking most predators
>>65582007>depends on how hard I shit my pants when I got a tiger bearing down on me.I’d recommend not doing that. It might think you’re Indian and be more prone to eat you.
>>65580716OI! YER A BAD FOOKIN' KITTY CAT! NO TREATS FER YOU MY SON!
>>65577842Who was in the wrong here?
>>65584471>Who was in the wrong here?The trespasser.
>>65577842I love how you can tell that this guy was a fucking braindead retard
Just throw a retard at him.
>>65586078What the fuck dude. Why is he like this.
>>65586083Specifically because it takes zero effort and pisses people like you off
>>65586083He's a lion!https://truthsocial.com/@realDonaldTrump/117437302760197063
>>65586092Pisses off? In what universe. I chuckled. And it wasn't a heartfelt positive chuckle.
>>65586098See that last part of your post? That right there isn't "I'm not angry" that's "I refuse to admit this shitpost got a reaction from me". He will continue to post it because, again, people react. Do you also feel the need to tell your Mom she's stupid and ruining the decorum of the family for liking cat pics on facebook? Same thing man.
>>65577842All autists deserve this fate btw
>>65586078>>65586094Lowkey disappointed it's fake.
>>65586166Oh ye of little faith.https://truthsocial.com/@realDonaldTrump/posts/117437094956438218
>>65586171I think he's disappointed Don didn't really jump into a tiger enclosure...
>>65586171Why the fuck would he do this lmao
>>65579990>I never go outside and use my tools, so no one else must eitherI guarantee that you are fat.
>>65586171The sad thing is, on some levels, decades from now, I'm gonna really miss this cartoonish motherfucker.
>>65586106My mom isn't the serving POTUS and in charge of the greatest military on the planet and decides what my taxes are spent on. My mom liking AI cat videos on Facebook is annoying but it isn't damaging to my country's prestige or relevance or standing. The POTUS doing it for 'shitposting' is embarrassing when there are so many other things he* could be doing. Like not pissing off his own party and opposition party by bailing Putin out - again.*I know it isn't him but his zoomie account handler
>>65586609>pissing off his own partyLol, lmao. He legalize silencer and upheld 2a, thats all i care about. My rights as american is more important than some third world shithole that currently in a losing war.
>>65586668>He legalize silencer>My rights as americanSAAAAAAAAAAAR
>>65586065The fuck was going on in his tard head anyway? Make a funny tiktok video of it? Take the tiger on and kick its ass? Fuck it?
>>65586123>yeah, I'm the only normie on herepot calling the kettle...
>>65586083He has a social media team, ask them. Unless you really think he sits around photoshopping shit for twitter
>>65581460Works on geese. Pointing shows you're not afraid and it throws them off
>>65581104Domestication doesn't necessarily mean breed selection. Systematic dog breeds were dodgy as fuck until the latter 1800s when animal fancy societies sprung up in general. Look at the first German Shepherd, Horand von Graffath, that dog looks nothing like today's GSDs, and it was only about 120 years ago
>>65586171I love my retarded president.
>>65577842I call Donald Trump and ask for his helkp
>>65586716He's a former child actor who was probably looking to become an influencerBBC had a video from one of his social media accounts taken inside the tiger enclosure as he was walking towards it while it was chilling up on a wooden platform
>>65586952>former child actorOh man, that explains everything. Poor son of a bitch.
