highkey why am i so fucking tempted to destroy my body by training upper body. i want to go gym, I don't want to be a bodyhon, i want to improve my lower body so bad but squats are gay and bench is awesome wtf is wrong w meeeeee. my body is alr like tall cooked inverted triangle build (but like ectomorphic tbf tho) I can't be making it worse by gymmaxxing but like, the wrong way, while trying to troon out. and if i were cis i could just do it but nah I'm a hon instead so i gotta do my faggy squats and kicks and shit while just looking like a faggot man fucckkk. fucked up why can't i get this want out of my mind why i gotta be so malebrained
ugh i just wanna go jim lift heavy why couldn't i be a cis so i wouldn't have to worry about this as much. is there any way to like make this work without making myself a hon like what if I avoided like, back stuff at least??
>>43689424Why waste your time being conflicted about what you like instead of just doing what you like?
muscle is hard to loseif you go the route of upper body stuff dont complain when you fuck yourself up>wahhhh the squats are so gay and stupid!!!!youre already trans thats embarassing enoughjust do the fucking kicks nona
>>43689590cuz it's gonna make me a hon if it was just about it being malebrained i wouldn't rly care but it's gonna make me an even worse bodyhon than i alr am. kinda just hoping maybe someone will know a way to not end up too much of a bodyhon while doing it>>43689637i won't I'd only blame myself, as for the embarrassment i think part of it is because I'm a manmoder so ot does feel faggy idk, and also just idk i feel odd only doing lower body and i get more enjoyment from upper body and idk even like with the embarrassment doing upper body shit gives me permission in my mind to do the lower shit even if I'm doing way more lower shit so idk. hopefully i can fix my retarded brain before i fuck up my body. idk, i just find the upper body shit way more fun even though it goes against my actual goals, it's fucking stupid
>>43689424i dont lift anymore and do miss it, but throwing bales around and hauling wagons of muck satisfies the urge enough. t. roon who works on a farm
>>43689762what little manual labour i do at my job, mostly just lifting heavy bags of coal, i was p shit at but fine and the idea lf becoming weak to the point i struggle to do that kinda freaks me out like i esp want to.at least keep some baseline level of strength for sure
