A couple days ago, after getting a haircut I decided I was gonna stop repping. I turned 18 three months ago, so why not? I talked to my mom about it, who has been the biggest speaker towards me about how bad it is to troon out. I told her how regardless of her feelings, I will troon out or die. Got to hear more of “biological this and that”, disallowments and more. And even after reminding her Im 18, I just get told it doesn’t matter since “you’re Mexican, you do what your parents say”. Along with another threat of having me sent to a crazy house and how Im being groomed by strangers online. It felt good to finally say it to her since it was an open secret between us for years, but my dysphoria is still here. I can’t even look at mannaquins at stores without feeling angry at myself, and envy of anything feminine. Every dream I have I have a female body, and it feels so normal, it makes me sick of waking up and realizing I still have a penis and testicles. How can I continue like this, I wish I could just do as said, but how when it’s so painful. I hope she will know that if it keeps going, I probably will kill myself. But honestly, I think shes just stuck in those ways. And yet, I still live by her grace
>>43690920it sounds like you need to remove yourself from her control. Can you move out? Go to college? Maybe she'll come around when she sees the real you after a few years
>>43690920you should cut your throat right in front of her,she'll take you to the hospital and will probably think twice before neglectign your dysphoria. (or she will let you die, and your problem is also solved)
>>43691076Unfortunetly not easily possible or impossible. She has access to, or knowledge of my resumes, medical insurence and history, social medias. As for college, I have absolutely no idea if thats possible since I don’t even know what l would even study or do for a living. And moving out is impossible as I live in California. From how she speaks she never will come around to the idea
>>43691155where in california? if you want to answer
>>43691155>California if my own living situation were better I'd offer you a place to stay. For now I can only wish you good luck sister
>>43691185209 area
>>43691218im sorry nona...
Foucault talked about this. I think your mom's a stupid cunt and dumb bitches like that should be lined up against a wall and shot Well anyways either you need to do something drastic or get recognition of gender dysphoria by an agent she would have utmost trust inlast resort is trying to OD on pills because everyone knows that shit doesnt work lol but maybe itll signal the severity of the issue, look up the least painful/ramifications ones if you do that
>>43690920>crazy houseyou know what? Call her on this. Make her take you to a psychiatrist. Let them explain this shit to her
>>43691302moidggression with zero actual helpful advice for op
>>43690920start diy asap (check archives for hrtgen) and just boymode until she comes around or you’re in a better situation
>>43691155you're 18, your mom doesn't have to have control over your financial status or medical history. She can't send you to a crazy house and she can't control your medical status. you're going to need to get a job and move out or go to college or something, the idea that you're just never going to move out is silly. Your mom is not going to support you on this and you need to get away from her sooner rather than later.
>>43691332lol some people don't like facing uncomfortable truthsi can tell u are one such nigger
>>43691410The issue is, Im Mexican and she kinda does. The thing being is that defiance against your own mother like that can only really come from a place of pure malice on your behalf. Besides I dont have a drivers license or permit, tried but I failed about five times and havent tried again since I was 16. And I don’t even know the password to my own state unemployment things or health insurance account. I am practically a useless adult
>>43691436you sound like an angry autistic man who had problems with emotional regulation, that certainly makes me uncomfortable
>>43691483>And I don’t even know the password to my own state unemployment things or health insurance accountyou can do that thoughyou don't need a car to have independence, but obviously it helpswhat's your plan for the future, just live at home for the rest of your life? Someday you will need to get a job and move out
>>43691496I honestly never thought about that. I did do good in performing arts in high school, but you cant make food from that unless you are Taylor Swift or something. I dont have any goals or aspirations, and even if I did I wouldnt hold them down right now because of my dysphoria. Im just waiting for a freak accident to happen and take me away
>>43691483get a bike and a PO Box (or a trusted friend with an address and/or car)
>>43691532well unless you're going to spend the rest of you life living at home waiting to get hit by a car, you need to figure out a planhave you ever had a job before?
>>43691570I had job training through a county program that helps cripples, retards, veterans and elderly people train for normal jobs. But that’s about it for me in terms of expirience
