Anonymous
05/25/26(Mon)20:38:09 No.43700603

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Anonymous 05/25/26(Mon)20:38:09 No.43700603

As someone who just started transitioning (MtF), I'm still somewhat plagued by doubt so a lot of this is overthinking but I'd still like some answers to my doubts. So sometimes when I'm writing or in bed, I have daydreams about romantic scenarios with cis women but I realize almost instantly that those relationships are pretty much impossible as a trans person. I know everything on the internet is not real but every time I see a cis woman and trans woman in a relationship, it always looks like the cis woman is either a creep chaser or someone suffering and coping with loneliness with their trans partner even though they wish their partner wasn't trans. My main issue is that I wonder if these daydreams represent a latent desire for these relationships or if it's just my writer brain going crazy because I do write romance from time to time.

Maybe as an attempt to cope, though I felt this idea even before I started to transition, I began to describe myself as asexual. Not entirely because I don't like labels lol, but in my life, I don't remember ever feeling "horny" or enjoying masturbation without immense amounts of regret. Additionally, I've never felt the desire to get into a relationship, feel like I'd do better without one, and the main sources of sadness in my life have nothing to do with relationships. I've re-contextualized those sexual experiences in my life as addiction partly because I was depressed and still struggle with living without vapid dopamine sources.

The answer that I'll use to help me sleep at night is that as a human, I have complete control over my thoughts so if I truly like and would prefer to be asexual, I could just do that. Additionally, I believe that loss is a natural part of life and I'll hate it no matter what so I shouldn't worry about it too much.

Thank you and have a wonderful day.