can someone please comfort me or just talk to me for a couple of minutes
>>43767439hi, what’s wrong?
>>43767441i'm just really depressed and hopeless. i should be happy, things have been improving for me, but i still want to die. i feel like everyone hates me no matter what i do. i try to be kind and respectful but i still lash out. everyone everywhere is awful constantly. reading the stuff people say here definitely isn't helping but i have nowhere else to go. i feel trapped in my body, even being on hrt now. i don't feel like anyone will ever see me as a man and i don't think i'll ever be able to either. i'm just a failure. i think i want friends but i'm scared of getting close to people. i wish i had succeeded when i had attempted suicide in the past, but i backed out because i'm a coward. i don't want to end up as another statistic, i wish i could stay alive out of spite or whatever but i don't know if i'll be able to.
Not gonna comment on your life situation but just want to say life truely isn't that long so you shouldn't cut it short even if you accomplish nothing with your life and do nothing and are sad the whole time you should still just ride it out. think of how many people ever lived, not just live right now, and how many shitty situations there have been way worse than yours I know that's cliche but like what's the big deal just live it out and talk to people and make friends and be comfy and occasionally something will make you happy once in a while even if it's few and far between. totally worth sticking it
>>43767525you could be living in India anon
>>43767525Hey, I would describe my situation almost exactly the same way as you, it is almost uncanny, even though I am moving in the opposite direction(MtF). I tell myself that I am a vessel for future possibilities, and that I have to safeguard what I can become, inside of me, until it is grown enough to emerge. I try to pave the way for it, improve where I can, and prepare my life and body to create an comfortable place for my future self. It is unpleasant at the moment, the vessel is not who I want to be, but I am moving in the right direction, and you are too. HRT is a huge step that simply takes time. I see the awkward time in between as kind of a larval stage, not egg anymore, but neither the full Imago. The task of a Larva is gathering what it takes to grow. If you are not who you want to be yet, endure and make ready for your self yet to come
>>43767652i think thats a great way to think about it!
