it pisses me off so much seeing passoids and their luckshit proportions. are you having fun not being a shemale freak? are you having fun being desirable? hows being treated like a woman? fuck you.and the worst part is every single one is so bdd. i wake up every day with a ribcage bigger than a car, hips as vertically wide as a pencil, and the most egregiously male jawline with a FUCKING CLEFT CHIN. not to mention how estrogen hasnt done shit to change my fat redistribution after a YEAR. it hasnt changed a single damn bit, i look like a disgusting moid beer belly pig every time i weight cycle in a desperate attempt to have it go anywhere remotely feminine and not all only in my gut.>inb4 "what are your E levels?" HIGH.and then i have to go outside and act like im proud to be a troon and so so positive! being a troon is great! yay! cause no one anywhere else but here acknowledges that transitioning doesnt do shit to make you happier if your skeleton is FUCKED. the average wokie wants you to be content with being a neverpass ngmi hon. not talk about how much being trans fucking sucks cause the mass "empowering" hugboxxing and honfidence agenda is the top priority.and then these fuckers walk around living MY DREAM of being remotely fucking feminine and cute and are saying they are ugly????? fuck. you. i hate the confident ones to, i hope something horrible ruins your life and you never experience all that joy again, i hope you get lynched by a bunch of MAGAtards.i just want to be desirable so fucking badly but i never fucking will be and seeing someone who alsp trooned out be desirable makes me pop a blood vessel. and no its not an agp thing, its just the regular human urge to be loved. its all i want and its the only thing in life that i even care about but its completely out of my reach, its some kind of sick joke.t. midshit gigahon
Wow the unique experience of not being hot
>>43789569i feel u anon :(
>>43789650when cis people are "not hot" they are always more hot than when a trans person is not hot, be so fucking fr.
>>43789569You could just embrace being a gay feminized male on HRT if you know you don't pass. Just enjoy it for what it is.Honestly, sometimes I wish I was a neverpasser and hadn't gotten SRS.I live in constant anxiety about being clocked, I have several dysphoria, I have to hold onto and maintain the belief that I pass, but I have constant paranoia that everyone is just pity gendering me female out of respect. I spiral and wonder what people are saying about me.Worst of all is the isolation... my only friends are trannies and I've pulled away from them now that my transition is finished. The only cis woman I am friends with is a lesbian who thinks about becoming and is basically just another Austic queer friend, and she's great but I don't have any others.I wanted to become a normal woman, people say I pass, but I assume they're delusional or lying, I am paranoid I am delusional, I am lonely, and I still hate myself because I perceive myself as manly. The doubt and uncertainty and anxiety makes me so stressed that sometimes my boyfriend will make a joke about trannies and i'll spontaneously burst into tears.And you know what else? I fantasize about being a gay man, having a pot belly, losing my hair, being a "bear." I think about the carefree life I could have had if I could just accept myself as a gay male.
>>43789569Im so sorry that you have to deal with that. Really. I know it wont mean much but I was at the same Position as you are right now. You are a midshit so there is room to make it work. I know you probably want to vent and I totally get that, you have every reason to. If you want to change something you can try the same thing that helped me. First of all, e didn't do shit for my body the first 4 years. I still looked like a gorilla. First of all lose weight. Get a app and track your calories. You want to get as low that you can stand your belly and it doesn't look like a beer belly anymore. Second of all. Hit the gym. And I don't mean once a month or so. Twice a week. Train your butt and hips as hard as you can. Do shit like bulgarians, hip thruts, deadlifts, 45 degree cable kickbacks and abductions. Watch your protein intake. You want at least 1,5g protein for every kg your weight. Be fucking disciplined. It took me 2 years of consistent discipline to get near a X body. I'm not a supermodel but my body is at least cis passing. Face is a bit harder. You probably need ffs if its really that bad. So get a job. It doesn't matter how much it sucks. Dysphoria sucks more. Calculate how much you can save every month and see if you can get a credit for that amount.This is want I did. It suck fucking hard and I wanted to give up every so often but I countinued and live stealth now.
I'm >>43789873 and I relate to >>43789795 a lot. Living stealth isn't sunshine an rainbows. It's never ending anxiety if your really stealth or every is just playing along. Every little interactions is taken apart in your head and searched for clues that you don't pass and everyone can tell. You constantly check your self for every little thing that others might consider masculine and use to clock you. You look in the mirror and still see a man because you constantly worry about little things you are scared of Will give it away if someone watches to close. Its just trading one hell for another.
