I think "cis male on estrogen" is a good start, but it's not enough. I'm more of a "cis male trans woman". Like I definitely feel better as a woman than as a man, but I also prefer being a man to being a woman. Do you get what I mean? My preferences are like, being a trans woman > being a cis man > being a cis woman. Basically what it is is I want to look and act a lot like a woman and not at all like a man, but I'd rather not actually be a woman; I'd rather be a man. If I were born as a cis woman I think I'd be less happy than I am now, because I'd be missing something fundamental, which is the peace of mind of actually being a man. But like this is different from just being a feminine man, because I'm not really that invested in being feminine? My personality is a good bit naturally feminine but it's much moreso just extremely incapable of being masculine, and I want that to be visible to other people. Like, I want to have long hair and a pretty face and a soft, estrogenised body, so that other people won't mistake me as someone capable of acting in a masculine way. I want them to compare me unconsciously to a woman instead, so that I can settle more naturally into the social role of a woman. But it's the kind of thing that doesn't really work if I try to signal it through things that are obviously conscious choices, like clothing or makeup. I have to come across as a woman inside, even if I'm boymoding on the outside. Actually, that's kind of my ideal end state? Like being a cis male is something that can't really be taken away from me, so it's fine if I do that in a lazy way by just like wearing a men's hoodie or whatever, but I care a lot about being a trans woman, so it's something I need to commit to taking estrogen for. So that means I'm a cis male trans woman, basically. I don't feel bad about being a cis man but I do feel motivated not to be mistaken for one.
You are really self involved. Hope you are able to grow up one day.
>>43932468What do you mean?
>>43932350>No i actually prefer being a fake simulacrum rapist rather than a real woman because (made up bullshit reason)whatever helps you cope ig
>>43932574It's really weird that you say that. I've never wanted to rape anyone in my life. I basically completely prefer to be on the receiving end.
>>43932593Yeah that's what I assume that's why I don't get why you'd want to identify with the rape genderMy guess is that in your mind you associate trans women with sex crazed women with a moid libido and moid brain and view cis women as above that so you feel guilty about wanting to be a cis womanOr maybe you just think the same way tiktok ftfemboys do where you're really into the fag astheticEither way doesn't really matter as long as you keep taking estrogen and i agree with >>43932468 you'll probably grow out of it
>>43932674No, it's not really that? Honestly I don't like to think ill of people and rape is pretty far from the first thing on my mind when I think about gender. And I don't feel guilty about wanting to be a cis woman, like I said, I don't want to actually be one, I just want to be very much like one. I don't really view cis women as being "above" anyone; from all of my interactions with them I find it hard to envy them a whole lot. They have a lot of heavy social expectations placed on them and it's hard for them to just exist invisibly, which is the thing I most appreciate about being a cis man; the benefit of invisibility. But I don't want the visible parts of being a man. I feel like being male is my own private business and it shouldn't be something that other people should get to comment on or emphasize or take advantage of. It's okay if it's someone I'm really close to and I really trust, but it's not okay the way most people go about it. So that's why I want to look like and come across as a woman. Also I work with a lot of women because of my career field and I think they're just really inspiring the way they support each other and take emotions seriously but not destructively and face their problems in a healthy way, and I really enjoy getting to be a part of that, I've never felt anything like that from men before. As for the TikTok stuff I don't think that's the case for me either. I do think femboys are cute but I'm not so into them that I'd wanna make it my whole identity. It'd be nice to have one as a boyfriend, I guess.
