How do you personally cope with not having supportive cis women who help you transition?
>>44040318I repress
I’ve become intensely misogynistic towards cis women
>>44040356Just be misogynistic towards misandrists
I will probably just rope this Summer
>>44040356So why do you want to be a woman if you hate them so much
>>44040318My female cis friend in high school lept on my dysphoric feelings and was very supportive, but I turned her away I knew I would lose my male friends and family
>>44040368I didn’t hate them before I transitioned, but cis women have treated me very poorly since I did.
>>44040318Learn to cultivate inner strength and support yourself from within
>>44040318Not worth it. Had a very close cis friend make me girlmode once when we went to a museum together, and she helped me pick out clothes, did my makeup for me, all that stuff.I wince at the memory. Genuinely sometimes they're just parading you around as token fags
>>44040318>How do you personally copeit definitely feels terrible not having someone to support mebut i also know that, if given the opportunity, i would just feel so patronized and disgusting that i would avoid it completely
>>44040372Close enoughWelcome back, Jax
>>44040318I dont have to. Letting ur cis friends do ur makeup is always a disaster tho. Dont do it
>>44040318why they always gotta be cis
This pisses me off so much she literally already passes flawlessly before the makeover like come on
>>44040356Based
>>44040495that's what cissies wantif you're ugly kys and never speak about your agp fetish
>>44040457after high school we went our separate ways and haven't talked since. I repped until 22. She went to harvard later. The moral of the story is, I'm very stupid.
I haven't been sober since I started transitioning 8 years ago
>>44040318cry continuously:3 having no friends, not being a girl, and being a monster makes me suicidal:P womp womp woooooooomp
>>44040372did she abstract after tha tho?
>>44040580Yes, you are (I am too lol)How are you doing these days? Any better? 22 ain't bad (also same age as Jax during the period of the show lmaooo)
>>44040378what did they do?
>>44040318i feel like shit. my cis female friend group turned against me and started treating me like shit for no reason a couple of weeks ago and i had to ghost them (this was our semester at uni anyways). i didn't even attend my graduation because there's nothing and no one left for me there. i haven't even trooned out or anything remotely related to that, maybe im just an agp autist. sorry for the rambling i needed to get it off my chest
>>44040796I'm doing a lot better these days, thank you for asking! I used to be very upset at how the past me acted, but looking back I now just feel sympathy for a hormonal, misguided, and abused teenager that I was. Now I'm working on myself, and I've been lucky to reconnect with some people from my past who are very supportive. In terms of age, I had a very early male puberty (medically speaking, borderline precocious) which was very difficult at the time but had the result that it was relatively mild. >Yes, you are (I am too lol)Did you have a similar experience?
>>44041028That's awesome :D>Did you have a similar experience?Sorta.. I've been on hrt for a while, but I'm still in the closet (and I think it's obvious q_q). I made good friends with a coworker of mine who is kind of a Tumblr-adjacent afab she/they nb (let's be real, she would be called theyfab here :/). Basically, I had every reason to know she would be supportive, and yet I've always denied, dismissed, or deflected any questions that bordered on lgbt. I went to the Renaissance Festival with her and some of her friends, who are much the same, and I just acted dumb as hell. I dunno how to describe the whole dynamic there. If I wanted to be optimistic, then it was like they were all encouraging me to open up the entire time by asking if I wanted to buy a hair accessory I was looking at or half-jokingly offering to buy me a tiara that was on sale or any number of little things throughout the day. At one point, my friend half-asked if I was nb, like it was already a given, and I dumbly said "uhh no... just a guy"She has since quit due to our manager. We are still friends, but we talk much less frequently, and I think I should reach back out. I think the funny 90s 3D circus show has made me want to stop being so avoidant all the time. Weird.It's great to hear your story of someone who is actively making it out there. It is possible!
>>44040356>>44040363>>44040528Based It’s time for this board to wake up
>>44040318it’s really difficult nona. i’m sorry and i feel your pain. my mom and sister were very terfy towards me for a long time and i didn’t have many cisf friends. it’s a very isolating experience and i understand if it makes you feel bitter and lonely. please understand sometimes what we see in others isn’t really what’s going on in their heads. everyone, cis women too, have their own problems going on. you might have to be lonely, or reliant on other trans women for a significant portion of your transition, but i assure you there’s plenty of normal cis women out there who will treat you like one of them. i know it’s hard but keep living
>>44041684that being said i don’t really like most cis women. i think on average they are terfs but you can find normal ones i promise. we live under a bad society but that doesn’t mean everyone of the upper caste is evil
>>44040318I stayed at my friend's house a few months ago, who is a tranny with a cis gf, and I had this pic happen to me. Kinda, at least. I'm a boymoder and her gf got some of her old clothes out for me to wear and did my makeup, and I remember looking in the mirror kinda like that picture. It wasn't really that good, though. I'm very petite and short and stuff, but my face is awful and I just looked like a hon, in my opinion. I got drunk as fuck that night, though, so I didn't really care how I looked that much. I still go back in my camera roll and look at the pictures sometimes, though. It's the only time I've ever actually felt like a woman. I wish I could feel as free as I did that night.Besides that, my cis cousin used to wash my bras for me when I wasn't out at home and couldn't do it here. She also went out with me and bought a witch costume for a Halloween party. I tried it on when we got back to her house and literally cried my eyes out in front of her because I'd never worn anything like that before.
>>44040318they arent real so just.... go about my day i guess....?
I think of myself as a 90's female action hero.
>>44040318I became the woman and support myself. I've been taking care of myself for almost as long as I can remember. Why change things now?
>>44040318A) all cis women cannot be trustedB) not trooning
>>44042463>I still go back in my camera roll and look at the pictures sometimes, though. It's the only time I've ever actually felt like a woman. I wish I could feel as free as I did that night.nona this is a sign, reach out to them
>>440403564chan is the greatest website
>>44044018i think of you as an agp boomerhon
>>44040318They never have Ragatha being supportive in these and it grinds my gears. Ragatha would 100% help make over Jax and be kind and supportive it's her whole God damn thing
>>44045148Ragatha is fake nice
>>44046597Literally not true, Jax just said that to mislead Pomni into not trusting RagathaRagatha is a bit of a people pleaser sure, but it's pretty clear subtext that this is a trauma response to surviving her mom. That's even why she said the whole thing of like, "I hate you but I don't want you to hate me" to Jax, it's because she can cope being around Jax because it's kinda nothing compared to her mom's abuse. (But I think that's also why, among other things, she struggles to stand up to Jax as well)
>>44040318my misanthropy makes me view every act of kindness as a ploy or a joke so I would probably just ignore them anyways
When I transitioned the most transphobic friend I had was a woman so I blocked her soon after
>>44040318i had supportive cis women friends and they were nice to me but they never actually gave me help transitioning/looking femmost of them were either too nerdy to really know what to say or ended up being nonbinary (usually both) so maybe thats part of it
>>44040318I'm afraid of people. I'm afraid of people hurting me. I don't doubt that men can hurt me badly. I'm just scared of women hurting me more. If some cis woman I met ever decides to, she could easily break me and i guess that they would be right to do so. I'd rather be alone. I only spend time with the ones who I can trust 100%. I'm scared of meeting new people.
>>44047033>my misanthropy makes me view every act of kindness as a ploy or a joke...sameor as a debt that i somehow have to payback
>>44047913a cis man can just kill you, while a cis woman will socially kill you and use you as an example on how trannies are evil misogynist that want to destroy woman, same can happen with nonbineys/tman and they'll socially kill you and ostracize you. there is no salvation.
>>44047915bonus points if you grow up with a less than ideal mother and or were a socially stunted kid leading to all experiences with women and girls being tainted with fear and paranoia
Do trannies never look nasty(like moids) or do people just not have deep internal self-hatred when they dislike their appearence. Can not conceive of looking like s nerdy moid and telling a female foid that you're a trooner esp early on when you smell like a guy and look like one.?Tranny mindset baffles me
>>44047975most people aren't retards and don't come out until some time on hrt and some effort, terminally online tranbians are not representatives they just flood all spaces where they get to hide behind a faux persona to feel less disgusting
>>44047999I got the advice to "come out socially" before hrt(not trans the advicegiver was just confused on that point.)Seems like an insane thing to say considering you'd just look like a regular average dude since life isnt a cartoon where people predestined to troon have looked basically like a woman from birth.
im soon reaching 3 months on e and still a hon, should i kill myself?
>>44048121that was shitty advice by someone who does not fully understand the social ramifications of your situation, being any flavour of tranny/hrt user is an extremely personal and humiliating thing and no one else will really have any sense of reference for what you feel because of that
>>44048121This is why you shouldnt listen to them and go diy instead since theyre gonna hondose u
>>44040318drinking a lot really. doesn't have to be cis women either, i just wish i had someone supportive at all in my life. i wish i was dead but i'm scared of dying because i was raised religious and even though i'm an atheist and don't believe in souls, i'm still super scared that i will go to hell and suffer for all eternity
>>44048170this desu, the medical system for trannies is a humiliation ritual meant to wear you out through sheer shame
>>44048184Sounds like religious trauma, don't know if youre a repper or closeted but i'd recommend to stop drinking to help your transition
>>44048213i transitioned a long time ago. i'm just also very tall, ugly and apparently not worthy of being loved or even liked.
>>44048170Theres a protranny clinic that claims to dispense hrt scripts 1 meeting in and thats where i vill go if i decide to get oj h r t.Could also be a scan since they charge 150€ for the hour long meeting The claim is tho, that you will leave with a valid script which you then take to endo and then endo schedules 1 blood test and then gives you your dose
>>44048240>scanScam
>>44048240orrrrryou can get a years worth of hrt for like $80 and not have to humiliate yourself constantly in front of people about it as a bonus
>>44048261Yeah but i love following the rules and procedures
>>44048240I'd always recommend diy to not be in the pocket of pharma, if you have access to blood tests you can also monitor your own levels and are less likely to be hon dosed etc.
>>44048277You're goycattle then sorry hope you get well soon
>>44046597This is a dumb ass interpretation of her character lol. Her entire thing is being overly people pleasing is a trauma response from years of abuse. Generally when people don't break they bend and Ragatha's mom abused her so much that she bent and lives her life for the pleasing of other people. That doesn't make it not genuine it makes it misguided. Thinking being a people pleaser is "fake nice" is the kind of shit schizos think to cope with the fact that they see niceness as weakness so naturally someone being "nice" is doing it to trick or get something out of you.Shit ass take from a shit ass media illiterate zoom zoom.
>>44040318> last winter, attend fetish club event managed by friend> dance for the first time in a while at queer inclusive party> light a cig in the smoker lounge with bar> be chatted up by giant belgian bear mechanic> buys you a drink, sits down with you, absolute sweetheart, incredibly gentle> confidently asks if you would enjoy being touched more> tells you he's triple your age, has daughters older than you. laughs about it> kisses you softly with rhythm. knows when to slow down, when to twirl your hair.> buys you as many rounds of drinks as you ask for> start involving the pair of cis girls sitting next to you in conversation> he also buys drinks for them> cis girl pair find your manic tgirl power trip fun and the guy surprisingly charming> bear ultimately has to leave but professes he wants you to come live with him> supposedly owns giant mansion with an entire apartment unto itself that you'd be allowed to live in> you're drunk as fuck and he's gentle enough to let you "enjoy the rest of the night"> he writes his number on a piece of paper, you stick it in your dress and kiss him good night> you chat with the girls for a while, some sheik decides to sit down with you> sheik buys you drinks, the girls don't like him> girls leave for the dance floor, but tell you to reach out if this new guy is a creep> sheik's less gentle, keeps complaining about his brother that's pestering him about money in dubai> if he's not allowed to touch you he won't buy you cigs or drinks> ok. just wait until he folds, you know he won't make the effort to talk to anyone else> reluctantly buys you stuff anyway> continues to complain> gets sick of his own complaining, demands that you come home with him in return for the drinks, etc> tell him that you're not interested> he starts actually screaming that he's OWED this and you have no clue what "kind of life you're passing on"
>>44048395> the cis girls from before find you> one of them approaches the bar, which calls out to security> bouncers tell him to pack his shit and leave> sheik starts yelling some shit about calling the cops, that they're racist> spend the rest of the night telling the girls about what an insecure creep this asshole was> kinda close to 6am at this point anyway, wait out the rest of the party tho, don't wanna end up seeing the asshole waiting for me somewhere outside the club> the girls start talking about playing dress-up with you> get all flustered as they tell you your game with guys is insane> alc starting to take its toll on you> gonna throw up, one of them goes to the bathroom with you pushes you to the women's bathroom> come back, they buy you another round> exchange phone numbers as the club closes> other tgirl that worked the bar catches my eye> chat her up as the cis girls fetch their things from the club wardrobe> cis girls find you again> last thing they tell you is that "girls gotta stay together, and you're always welcome to crash on their couch. plus, they've got a giant walk-in wardrobe they've got to dress you up in"> go home with bartender> never talk to cis gals again, as your life takes turn after turnfuck, what life did i pass on???not with the sheik, the sheik can go fuck himself to the thought to the rejection
>>44048474>sheikHAG ALERTTTTT
>>44048474like, i still have their number? should i write them? i should.. but what would i say? "i'm that tranny from last year ^^' didn't mean to forget"
>>44048479ugh, i was 22 for what it matters. also being half filipina makes you know these things.
>>44048499yeah pretty much exactly that,you should also give me your number as well haggie
>>44040372Life-defining fumble
>>44048518_mens_rea.23on Signal
>>44048534the amount of self doubt and programming you'd have to overcome to make that leap makes it a pretty understandable fumble even if it's still frustrating
