im not upset with her and id never tell anyone if it is and im asking her so i dont have to ask my friends incase they judge her but there was a time that she wanted to have sex and i said no i wasnt in the mood i was really sad abt smth and she kinda just took my pants off and put it in at a point she said she felt bad but i told her she could keep going if she wanted i just wasnt in the mood and at a point she started playing w my tdick to try and make me like it and there was a time in the shower wear i was sore so i didnt want anything in me but she went to put her fingers in and i pulled them away a few times and she gave up and made violent gestures at me so i pulled tugged on her hair (it was up in a bun) and it was fine or a minute or too until she waited for me to late my guard down and kinda just forced her fingers in me and moved them faster until i stopped trying to get them out other than those incidences she hasnt rlly done much to make me think smth like this she at most just kinda pesters me abt sex or like just seems kinda annoyed/upset until i give in and its not like i dont understand why she gets annoyed its bcz boners are annoying and my body gets her off faster than her hand and it really is flattering that she like always wants me but like i dont know its alot i alr got a yeast infection from letting her cum in me too much shes really wonderful and i try to tell myself that i should just let her hit when she wants because of how much she does for me but sometimes i feel like gross and dont want to have sex or like its not always my responsibility to handle her arousal because she thinks im cute idk im sorry
>>44144126yes
>>44144126that sounds like rape. she's a rapist. extremely coercive.
its me anon the pic is basically unrelated unless you saw my post asking if i should detrans for my gf then it is related and youll understand the small girl is how my situation makes me feel (situation of the other post not this one)
>>44144143ik this is probablly a dumb question but do you think i could just get away w pretending its not or atleast that its fine ive had ppl treat me alot worse than she does and im lwk kinda used to be assaulted atp (i was b4 her not bcz of her)
>>44144126if you did not enthusiastically consent to the sex then you were coerced into it and coercion into sex is rape, so yes, you were absolutely raped.
chat the consensus seems to be she is raping me is there a solution besides breaking up she really great when shes not doing that or in the mood too she comes to see me whenever i need her and buys me food and stuff if the only option is just coping thats okay i can forgive her
>>44144252>>44144670You shouldn't accept evil things from somebody in exchange for them to do what sounds like the bare minimum of nice things too. I'm sorry. I can't tell you exactly what to do, but I really really hope you don't keep her in your life. She needs to face repercussions or at least be held accountable for her actions.
>>44144126"She" is a man. Perpetrating rape is extremely malebrained.
>>44144723lol if you think afabs dont do exactly the same shit and get extremely mad about being denied sex and do everything they can to coerce you if you say no
>>44144741>An estimated 91% of victims of rape & sexual assault are female and 9% male. Nearly 99% of perpetrators are male.Yes woman can rape but rape is overwhelmingly malebrained. "She" is a man and you need to report him to the police before he hurts someone else
>>44144796thats reported case you retarded female rapists go under reported due to victims often not seeing it as rape and as a win bcz female perps usually go for kids or they dont report it because most men are embarassed to be raped period i might be getting sexually abused but YOU are incredibly miserable, and misogyny brained (malebrained by ur asinine logic) because you think women are not just as capable of committing barbaric crimes when biologically we are egalitarian meaning women fill the exact same roles as men to the same standard your brain is poisoned by patriarchy male and female brained does not exist in terms of behavior its brain activity, but say we do go by your logic then there is a malebrained and femalebrained way to rape someone considering shes not physically violent with me when she does so it would be a femalebrained style of rape
>>44144904also im not calling the cops on a trans woman so she can go get v-coded and have a much worse time than me atleast i have an idea of the extent she will go with me her going to prison is a death sentence
>>44144706ill try to maybe ask if we can put sex on hold for a little and see if an across the board shut down on it might fix things but atm i cant really leave im like the only person in her life rn andi give her my extra prog pillsi know physically speaking i can leave but even if shes hurting me i cant in good conscience leave her like that i appreciate your concern and trying to help alot though
>>44144126Are you the dood from earlier who complained about their relationship.If this is all true you should probably break up, just don't publicly call her a rapist or whatever because the trans women/some trans men in your area will probably automatically take her side if she starts accusing you of raping her to muddy the waters unless you have proof.Get at least some undeniable proof so you don't get ostracized
>>44145121Trust me i believed this one girl for a year because there was no definitive proof on either sideand the people who were defending the other partner had previously batted for a trans woman with multiple allegations from other trans women like a month before so i ended up pitying this retarded theyfab and xe ended up harming more people.
yes dumbass get the fuck out of there
i think this is an unpopular opinion but i think its okay for the person in a relationship with you to do whatever they want with your body. they have a right to it.
>>44145121idk it depends on what post ur talking abt if it was the one where i was considering detrans for my gf yeah that one was me but like i def dont plan on telling anyone like ever its not a super big deal to me and we live in like theyfab hell theyd eat her alive i do appreciate your advice but leaving her atm is complicated still thank you though
>>44145209i think this opinion is okay to have if your partner has the same sentiment and you both believe it to the same degree
>>44144987You don't owe her help when she hurts you, forces you to have sex, or coerces you to do other things. It doesn't matter if she does nice things to make up for it.If she openly hit you and caused you to bleed, would you leave then? What if she threatened your family? Or forced you to quit your job and not talk to your friends? You need to take a hard look at your situation and figure out if somebody else was in your shoes, what would you think or feel or tell them to do
I think as a species we would be better served with more words than just "rape" because it's the same thing if a guy jumps a woman in the park at night and beats her unconscious then has sex with her limp body and then kills her afterwards, vs two dysfunctional people in a relationship and one is horny and the other isn't and the horny one is kinda pushy and the not horny one isn't really into it but doesn't exactly want to go through the trouble of saying nah not now I have a headache so the not horny one just kinda rides it out while thinking about a nintendo or did she remember to pay her cable bill or some shit.Because what happens is that the whole thing gets distilled down to "has a horrible crime been done to you" and my hot and spicy take is that in the second case, a horrible crime was not done. Especially if the passive one is also half thinking "oh I guess this reminds me that I'm hot, that's nice"Obviously everyone involved in a sex act should swear on the bible before sex and in front of a live studio audince that they affirmatively consent and before each escalation re-affirm this fact. Obviously both parties in op's case should work on their communication skills, but that's as far as it gets. I just don't see this as worthy of this >>44144283 "absolutely" raped. Yet that's what the word TECHNICALLY means and we have to let it account for both this, and the rape + murder in the park at night.Yet on the feminist internet it's the same thing and the rapist ought to be burned at the stake in both cases.It kind of makes me wonder all these stories about 1 in 3 women gets raped or something, what is really going on with those cases. I bet 95% of the "rapes" are like this.I'm open to being convinced that I'm wrong here, but I don't think it's likely I can be. I think most likely the arguments in favor of using the same word are just going to boil down to I'm a mansplaining moid who should be put to death, or something like that.
>>44145840i dont disagree or anything and this reply does make me feel better abt how im being treated but i did literally say in the post i tell her no when i dont want to "i said no i wasnt in the mood i was really sad abt smth" i know i didnt directly say it when bringing up other scenarios but i most definitely say no when i dont want it
>>44144987>ill try to maybe askSeriously nonny, why do you think someone who feels like they get to just take that option away from you is going to listen when you ask?Fine, using your body isn't a big deal to you, obviously it doesn't feel great and that's why you're asking, but you think shrugging it off is actually an optionSo you're settling. You're thinking, "This is the best I can hope for. It's not as bad as this other time, so it's basically like if it was good. Just cause I don't like it doesn't mean it's bad."This isn't something that improves with gentle persuasion. Each time it happens it's a test of boundaries, and if you make these excuses these things are going to lie between you as "proof" that you "like it"This isn't someone who cares about you, what you want, or what you need. You're giving the support you should have for yourself to someone who thinks of you like a couch or a shoe. You're not going to transform this into a good situation alone. If this happened to someone else, what would you tell them?
>>44145840The utility of the word is that it reifies the nature of the victims experience. Whether people should be skinned alive for their abuses is a different discussion, but the word is very useful in the context of saying, "This person did not want this."It sounds like your problem isn't with the word itself, so much as the equivocation between these two hypotheticals and the way people want to respond given the words WORST possible implication. Yes, there is nuance, it's great that you want the world of people to respond to that fact, but finding new granular terms to explicitly dissect the actions of someone who, at the very least, didn't think of what their proverbial partner for this act wanted? It doesn't do that. People already live on either side of a binary, "rape isn't real, the female body has ways of-" etc, or "touching hands is hitler and men should be castrated after puberty, their genetic FILTH stored for womxns convenience and pleasure.", and new terms aren't going to shift the entire culture. The work of convincing people not to seek revenge instead of actual justice and recovery is going to be the work of lifetimes, not a single linguistic hat trick.
I wouldn't mind being raped like that but if you mind you should tell her to stop
>>44145840>Yet that's what the word TECHNICALLY means and we have to let it account for both this, and the rape + murder in the park at night.tyler robinson and jeffrey dahmer both committed murder. one morally charged word can describe scenarios with a range of associated moral harms, that doesn't necessarily mean there's something wrong with the definition. obviously some rapes are worse than others, but they're all despicable and deserving of the term i think. op was touched where they didn't want to be touched and sexually engaged with in ways they did not want to be sexually engaged with. it doesn't have to be a stranger who kills you in the park at night, that's still going to be wildly traumatic and i'm not sure what better term we could use. 'sexual assault' is an option, but that encompasses a range of much more benign (though still terrible) scenarios that i don't imagine speak to the specific trauma rape causes.
>>44144126You're a victim.
>>44144904Sure but do you really think it's underreported by that much? Women are by far the most common targets of sexual violence. I don't think it'd be much of a stretch to say the vast majority of men who have been raped were assaulted by men as well. Ergo, "she" is a man because rape is malebrained. Please protect yourself by getting as far away from him as possible.
>>44145602Ok but she actually is raping you so you need to gtfo
i didn't read your post op but one time i was having pity sex with a fat tranny and she kissed me after i specifically asked her not to and it felt rapet.boymoder
>>44146361yes well good thing i had several other points as to why thats wrong such as male and female brained dont exist as categories that can be defined by actions you need a brainscan to determine it
>>44146409oh that really sucks and im sorry to hear that but are you saying youre a trans girl who boymodes as a trans guy??? or am i misunderstanding the T part
>>44146491it doesnt mean anything im sorry
>>44144126bait. you know the answer retard
>>44146508oh no i was just curious no apologies here
>>44144126>>44144134anons say yes but i was raped lowk and drugged my self up but i could have left or fought him off ( i had knife) anytime and i choose not to i am in control and i dnt rly consider it rape
>>44146575is the idea here its up to me to decide if im being raped for myself ? i am terribly sorry for being retarded im very bad at implicit conversation
>>44146511no i didnt because i am a retard and the #raped too many ppl raping u heavily warps ur perception of it
